I am truly sorry to see that this one didnt make it, you have my prayers...
Im very new to this. I just had a D&C on friday. My dr found that i had a blighted ovum on thursday and i had a miscarraige when i was 15 that was extremely traumatic and i knew the only way i could get through this is by having the surgery. what makes it more difficult is that i am a Navy wife and my husband is away while this has happened. My family is more than supportive but it doesnt make it any easier. I was almost 11 weeks so its all a little hard to take in so quickly.
I have been married for two years and just found out today that my first pg is not going to continue...there was no heartbeat. We ttc for 11 mths and during that process I had surgery to clean out scar tissue, clear out my tubes, and remove an ovarian cyst...that was in April. We had three months of higher fertility post sx and got pg in the last month before we would have started clomid and IUI. We were thrilled to be pg. My husband deployed to Guam a month ago. While he was gone my u/s started to look scary...things such as the heartbeat is slow and the baby had not grown much in the last week. However, I still had hope that the baby could thrive. Today I expected to see proof that my baby had gotten a stronger heartbeat and had grown more. Instead, I was told there was no heartbeat. I am scheduled for a D & C on Monday. They said we can ttc two months later. The Red Cross is bringing my husband home from Guam...he should be here Sunday night. I am so grateful for this supportive forum. The stories make me cry but also give me hope.
In addition, my lil sister is pg with her second child. Our kids would have been one month apart.
Last edited by srh38; 09-21-2008 at 05:53 PM.
My DH (33) and I (30) have been ttc since 6/08. I finally had a bfp on 09/09 (a week before my AF was due) and bought my DH a book titled "What to expect when your wife is expanding"... I wrapped it up and gave it to him... he was soooo excited and with this being his first he wanted to call everyone right away and give them the good news. My darn dog chewed up all "4" of by bfp's and on Monday 09/15 I decided to buy another one for a keepsake... it came back negative, I was so surprised and didn't believe it . I called my Dr and the next day I had my bhcg checked again and the levels went down significantly Needless to say, I started bleeding on Wednesday. I am still soooo sad and can't believe it's already been a week.
Hello I'm Doc and I am so glad that I found this forum.I have been lurking in the background and finally decided to register so that I could share my story.I am 30yrs old and have a beautiful daughter Victoria who is 10yrs old.I have multiple health problems that started when I was a child which include Lupus,MS,Multiple Autoimmune disorders and an Infection in my heart along w/"women" problems that started when I got AF at age 9.I was told that I wouldn't be able to have children so I gave up on wanting them a very long time ago.I ended up getting pregant w/my first daughter,Victoria when I was 19 but was very ill from the begnning of conception and very high risk so much so that at 5 weeks they told me I would have to have my one and only tube tied as soon as I gave birth to my first daughter.Things went as well as could be expected w/her even though I went into labor when I was 6 1/2 month along.I finally gave birth to a beautiful daughter a month early on Aug.30,1998.After having her I had my tube tied and even though I would have liked to have one more knew that I never would be able too.Well almost.In 2005 my DH (not my first daughters father) and I found out that I was pregant when I was 2 weeks along.My health had gotten a lot worse since the first pregancy and my symptoms where a whole lot more intense and worse than the first time around.After a few weeks of adjusting to the shock and deciding that ok this was happening I was happy but causious about being pregant.I had us every week and being that I an DH are Paramedics we could listen to the babys heartbeat whenever we wanted (which was wonderful) things we going ok.Mother's Day weekend my younger brother graduated from College and we went and had a wonderful weekend and Mother's Day then came home.Then things got bad really bad.I was 20ish weeks and I started having severe cramping and pain and after waking up to me bleeding I called my doctor in the middle of the night at home.He told me to come straight to his office that he would met me there.My DH was away for work and I was alone so I was alone I got up and went to the docs office.When I got there he already had the us and everything ready and we both knew it was not going to be good.He did all of his "stuff" and looked at me and told me that I was in labor and that there was nothing we could do to stop me from loosing my daughter.He proceded to tell me that I was having her but he was going to do everything to make it a easy on me as he could.After an epidural and long endless hours w/my DH and w/my doctor who has been a long time personal friend I gave birth to our daughter Sydney Ryan Taylor Hunt @ 8:48pm on 5/13/05.She was already gone but I just sat there holding her crying.After more than 2hrs w/her they took her from us.Three days later I left the hospital w/o my beautiful daughter in my arms.It was the hardest thing that I have ever had to do.The second hardest thing was having to tell my other daughter Victoria that her little sister wasn't coming home but had instead gone home to be in heaven w/God.I still can't think or talk about Sydney w/o crying my eyes out.
I keep thinking that if I weren't so sick then I wouldn't have lost her and she would be here next to me right now.I feel that it is my fault & I know that it ultimatly was my fault.I know this because of my medical background and even my doctor told me that it most likely happened because my body attacked Sydney as if she were a foreign invader and as it would happen my body got rid of what it thought was the foreign invader.Sometimes I think that having all of the knowledge that I have is a total curse.I can't get over this and the nagging guilty feeling that if it were not for me Sydney would still be here.
I'm sry this was such a long post but this is the first time that I have written about what happend to my Sydney and it is taking a lot out of me.Thank u all for the support of this forum and the chance for me to talk about this w/others who know and understand what I have gone through and continue to go through on a daily basis.
God Bless You all,
Mom to Daughters Victoria Leigh (10) 8/30/98 Sydney Ryan Taylor Hunt born to Heaven 5/13/05 21wks
I was 20 when I lost my sweet sweet angel Adrianna. She had muscle dystrophy and we were told she would not make it to the age of 3. As time progressed, she became stronger and was surpassing what the doctors had said. She took her first steps at the age of a 13 months (we were told she would NEVER walk). By July, she was soaring with improvements. Her dad fell asleep while driving, and we lost her July 7th, 2005 at 9:12am. Her dad, soon after.
Shane was my miracle baby. No complications, soared through the pregnancy with flying colors until my water broke. October 23, 2006 he was born into heaven at 5:34pm.
In 2006, I met my DH. We had a whirlwind romance and I moved in Jan 2007. The end of May I started what we thought was AF, but something was different. I took a HPT, and it was positive- But I was miscarrying. We lost our Isabella June 6, 2007. Never even knew, until it was too late.
2007, was no different. 3 losses. May(chem), June(chem), & August(9wks).
I am 23, my DH is 27.
We are now waiting to TTC in April of 2009. I am praying every day next year will be different. Next year will be OUR year to become parents.
I would like to thank u all for the support that I have recieved from everyone since I have come here.I have found so much support and that has helped me a great deal.I am still trying to deal w/the loss of my Sydney.It has been 3yrs since I lost her but the 15th of last month is when she was to be born and so I have had a really bad week.I still cry everytime I think of Sydney but I know it is not always going to be that way.Even though she was not planned at all I was incrediblly excited when I found out I was pregant but I was devistated when I lost her.I so appreciate all of the support that I have gotten from all of u and am so glad that I found this forum because I have been able to talk w/u all about loosing Sydney which is something that I have not done.I'm so glad that I am able to talk to u all and deal w/this by talking about Sydney and what happened to me and her.Thank u so much for everything.God Bless u all.
Mom to Daughters Victoria Leigh (10) 8/30/98 Sydney Ryan Taylor Hunt born to Heaven 5/13/05 21wks
My name is Lily. On October 24 my husband and I were delighted to find out that we were FINALLY pregnant after trying to conceive for two years and struggling with irregular ovulation and countless appointments making sure both of us were still fertile. I am 32 and Jeff is 31 this month. Both of us have a child from previous relationships but it's been years since either of us have had children. I have a 9yr. old son and he has a 14 year old daughter... In between those years we both did a lot of growing up and partying and doing unsafe things that our late teens and early twenties brought along that could feasibly jeopardize our ability to have a family later in life. Jeff and I met four years ago and were married in August 06. We decided before our wedding that we wanted to try for a family immediately after we were wed. We both felt that being in our thirties and much more financially responsible and mature that we were in a good place to start a family. Upon finding out we were FINALLY pregnant via 3 positive home pregnancy tests we scheduled our first prenatal appointment. On Oct. 29 we were given an EDD of July 3. So, we celebrated by going out and looking at stuff to start our nursery, and looking into cd's and books to help prepare our menagerie of animals for the impeding arrival.
Monday morning I woke up only to find myself calling my Doctor first thing in the morning. The doctor advised us to go to the ER. Needless to say this is not the answer I wanted to hear and scared me to death. I called my Mom at work and she picked me up to drive me. (Knowing that I probably wasn't going to be in any kind of emotional state to be able to handle it, and my husband was still on his way to work I couldn't reach him til I was at the hospital) Jeff showed up at the ER shortly afterward.
After spending all day in the ER, we didn't really any real answers as to what was going on. They suspected that I wasn't pregnant, or not as far as we initially thought, and the U/s didn't show what was going on really well because of the heavy bleeding in my uterus. They felt that I may have already passed the baby. I had a follow up ultrasound with my doctor Tuesday. Tuesday morning they discovered that my pregnancy is in my right tube and diagnosed me with an ectopic pregnancy. I'm on bed rest for the rest of the week.
They gave me Methotrexate, a drug used in cancer patients, to dissolve the pregnancy to hopefully avoid surgery. The drug may cause some scarring in the tube and I may lose the use of that tube. However, I risk the same with surgery. From what I am able to gather from the explanation of the doctors is that the drug is used to try to dissolve tumors in cancer patients and is very caustic and likely to make me very ill while on it.
We lit a candle for "Christopher" yesterday evening and had ourselves a good cry. Today we've cried some and talked more... we even managed a couple giggles and sweet nothings between phone calls and emails from friends across the nation and my family dropping of some comfort food for me. I know that I am blessed to have so many people that care about us, and that Jeff is the loving husband that he is. I don't know how I could get through this if he wasn't here with me.
About 11 years ago I got pregnant the first time with my exhusband. The pregnancy ended badly and almost killed me (literally) when I had the miscarriage. I had hemorrhaged and almost bled to death from the loss. My exhusband refused to even show his face at the emergency room and had the audacity to fight with me when I got home. He wanted to know where his van was because he had to be at work in the morning. I had left it at the hospital. I was in no condition to drive the 6 blocks home. The doctors had filled me up on a few pain killers and god knows what else. Shortly there after I moved 500 miles away from him and started a new life.
This time while I was in the emergency room I knew Jeff was there, but that fear of him not being there definitely reared its head when he moved his truck from the 30 minute parking zone.. I don't suppose it was too irrational a thought to have considering I have been through it before.. It was probably the greatest gift I got from this was knowing that through thick or thin, no matter what the cost, my husband was with me and loves me unconditionally. He wasn't mad that I called my mom. He wasn't angry that he lost a day at work. I was glad to see that he was as heartbroken as I am about losing this child... It let me know that he felt something.... I suppose being glad he was hurt by this isn't a nice thing to feel, but I don't know any other way to put it... I went from one extreme to another.. From a husband who could give two ######s less if I lived or died losing his child, to one that was brought to his knees in grief by the loss of his child... Is that really cruel and insensitive of me?
no. it's not cruel at all. it's not that you are happy that he is in pain you are happy that he cares.
Hi ladies... I figure it's time to come over here... I have had a total of six losses and two live biths. My first loss was in April 2001 and the cause is unknown. The second time I got pregnant, I gave birth to my DD (March 2005) early but she was healthy and honestly, I saw her as a miracle. I had been told that I'd probably never conceive again after having her, so DH and I decided to try to beat the odds...
I got pregnant three more times in 2005 (July, September, November)...all of which ended in loss. We decided to try once more time, but I ended up losing yet again in January of 2006. After that, I gave up. I didnt want to take the pain anymore and I slowly became okay with the fact that maybe my DD would be my only child.
Much to my surprise in December 2007 I found out I was pregnant again. The pregnancy was rough, but I gave birth to another healthy girl in August 2008. She's beautiful and we are so thankful yet again.
I was put on the mini pill because we thought it would be best to hold off TTC for awhile due to the past. ...Well, the pill failed and I got pregnant, only to just recently lose over the holiday weekend -November 2008 and I'm just numb to it.
As of now, we are still not preventing and putting things in God's hands. If all else, we will TTC either Jan/Feb 2009. The causes of 5 of my 6 miscarriages has been confirmed as Incompetent Cervix.
Last edited by BleedingBlack; 12-01-2008 at 04:21 PM.
Welcome.. this is a great place to share our experiences and find support!!
I totally understand how you are feeling.. I had 3 mc in five months period (a total of 5 mc in two years) and I was devastated. a- I conceived last year - without any treatment - DD is 9 months.. but each mc was very painful. If you ever want to talk more.. you can PM -
I joined this site in August and haven't said much because I usually read other posts to make myself feel the comfort that other people know of what I have been through. I recently mc in August. It was early on, but any mc is hard. I have a healthy 20 m/o daughter and I got pregnant the next cycle after the miscarriage and wasn't trying. I love these forums b/c everyone is so nice a welcoming. I pray that everyone including myself that's pregnant has a safe pregnancy. I wish for every mom that has lost a child the peace in knowing that those babes are in heaven and in a better place with no suffering. Just wanted to introduce myself and say hi to everyone!!!
Me and my boyfriend were so excited to find out after 3 years of trying to concieve... we did it.
We went and saw our little ones heart beat and i was so happy and still in shock that i was going to be a mommy. I have wanted this for so long.
when we went in to hear the hearbeat my heart broke a little that day. They couldnt find my babys heart. The doctor told me not to worry because i have had no cramping and no bleeding. and they would try again at my next U/S appt. 4 wks from that day.
That very next week i changed my doctor due to location and had my first nurse visit on Dec 10. I went alone thinking i was going to do some paperwork and be out in no time. My boyfriend had to work that day so it was no big deal. I talked to the nurse about all the family history blahblah... i told her that the week before they couldnt find the heart. she told me that she would try again and not to worry sometimes it cant be heard with doppler for some time. she tried with two different doppler gadgets and then said that we would do a u/s just to see the heart. i was kinda excited to see my little one again since it had been 4 wks since i had seen its heart.
i went into the u/s room and the tech was very nice and talkative until she asked me if i was sure when my last period was. after that the talking stoped. and that is when i stopped looking at her face. something was wrong. she left the room in a big hurry without saying anything to me at all.
i went back to the room where i was jsut 20 minutes before and waited for the nurse. when she walked in i knew. she said that i was 12 wks along but my baby was only developed to 9 and there was no heartbeat. i lost it. my tiny miracle was no longer alive.
why did i have to be alone on that day. i went numb.
So fast forward to yesterday. me sitting in pre-op in my hospital gown waiting for them to take my angel out of me. with my family by my side i silently said goodbye to my baby and sent it to heaven.
In my belly for 12wks and 6 days. i will always remember this love i feel.
My name is Jessica & I m/c today @ 8 wks. I'm typing while crying my eyes out & trying deal with all the feelings pouring out of me.
I suffer from PCOS & my husband & I were elated when the pregnancy was confirmed - thought it would be difficult because of my condition. My Dr. said that concieving naturally is a good sign that we'll be able to concieve again, but now I fear that something with my PCOS may cause me to m/c again. I chose not to have a DNC & know that the intense cramping means my little angel is leaving my body. It's nice to know there is so much support on this site, it's definitely going to be a great help for me.
Thanks for listening.
I am so sorry for your loss. - my heart goes with youAs I was reading your post I remembered my first loss. I completely understand how you are feeling, I also have PCOS. I would recommend to take as much time you need to heal before you try again and to have a good doctor.
Welcome and please come here anytime.. we are here for you!
If you ever need to talk you can PM -
I can't believe I haven't posted this here yet…
After starting the TTC journey in December '07, we concieved in April and I got my BFP on Mother's day, 2008.
8 weeks later, I was told I would miscarry even though my HCG's had continued to rise at were at 267,000 at week 10.
I went thru several u/s and switched doctors before we could accept the fact that the baby stopped developing. I elected for a D&C at 13 weeks since my body hadn't even started spotting. After the D&C I spotted for 78 days waiting for my HCG's to return to normal. AF came a total of 105 days later.
As my 1/21/09 due date approaches, it gets harder for us emotionally.
Our little angel, Samuel, will be forever in our hearts.
I love him and miss him every day, and I will for the rest of my life.
My next loss was a chemical pregnancy in January, 2009. I would have been due 5 days before my own birthday.
I'm currently pregnant with a healthy little girl, due 1/17/10.... a BFP on Mother's day for the second year in a row. When the doctor ran Beta's, there was a significant rise at 20 dpo. The nurse commented that "there must be twins in there!" Sure enough, there was, but at that first ultrasound, it was discovered that baby B was already lost.
We consider our LO a blessing and her twin a guardian angel she will have for the rest of her life.
January seems to be a signficant month for us. Our first LO was due 1/21/09 and the doctor keeps saying the EDD for this LO is 1/17/10 - 1/21/10. We both cringe when we hear him say that. The chemical loss also occured in January - the week I was due with #1 and now #3.
Last edited by learningasigo; 10-19-2009 at 11:30 AM.
Well in September 2008 my hubs & I decided to TTC baby #4 I usually get pregnant very quickly but we didn't get a BFP til December 4 2008 when I realized I was 4 days late. So we told everyone cuz I had 3 normal healthy pregnancies with our sons & didn't think this pregnancy would be any different. Well on December 13 I went to the bathroom & when I wiped there was blood so I freaked out & called my hubby in & we called the Dr. who told me that IF it was a miscarriage it would be over in a couple hours with heavy bleeding & cramping so I waited for this heavy bleeding which didn't come & the cramps were no more than like a menstrual cycle so I went to bed & when I got up in the middle of the night the bleeding was very light & the cramps had stopped.
so on that monday December 15th I went to have my HCG levels checked & they were 10,000 so they were good on December 16th I went for an U/S & to our wonderful surprise the baby had a heartbeat so we thought that everything would be fine I went home & was on bed rest well I started to have more cramping & bleeding so on December 17th I had my HCG levels checked again but this time they were only 9,000, they went down which I knew that wasn't good so on December 18th 2008 we went for a second ultrasound & found that the baby no longer had a heartbeat,we were devastated, well that night I had severe cramping & really heavy bleeding & the next day when I woke up the bleeding had pretty much stopped so when I went to the Dr. to have my D&C done I told her I was no longer bleeding so she decided to just give me cytotec which would help get rid of any tissue that was left well when I left the Dr. office on the 19th I went straight to the hospital cuz my leg was very swollen & painful & what we found out was I have a huge blood clot in my left leg & since there really is no reason for me to get clots like that they are thinking that I have a blood disorder that causes clotting & that may have been the reason I miscarried but they have to do further test to find out....
So I was almost 7 weeks pregnant when we lost the baby & even though it wasn't there very long we loved it just the same as our other children so it has been very hard on us cuz I went from worrying about the baby to worrying about my leg so we didn't really have time to grieve so it hits us once in a while & we'll cry together & it helps
It has been awhile since I have been here and I just read thru all of the posts. I am sorry for everyone's losses and so inspired by the strength in all of you. We are still grieving our loss but I am functioning better and trying again. I hope all of us find a sense of peace because we will never forget.
I just miscarried. We only found out we where pregnant Jan. 5th, and it was clarified by our Health Department Jan. 9th. Then this past Tuesday (Jan. 13th) I started cramping and bleeding at work. I went home and decided to wait till Wednesday to go to the Health Department.
The Health Department sent me straight to the ER and after test and other things, my hCG level was 164. For me to have been 6 weeks pregnant that is really low. It should have been over 1,000. The ultrasound didn't show any sac or anything either. It is not official till I go back to the ER tomorrow to have my hCG levels drawn again, but I know. I just have that gut feeling.
I woke up this morning and bled alot. Passed alot of clots and have been bleeding pretty heavy all morning. That and also this morning when I woke up, I felt normal. No pregnancy symptoms or nothing. Just dull cramping in my lower abdomen and bleeding.
It is hard to fathom being pregnant and happy one minute and not pregnant the next. I was hoping I would be one of the lucky ones to never experience this, but I guess I was wrong.
We do plan to try again, though I cannot lie and say that I am not at the least bit worried that it may happen again. We can only hope....
I just got the results back from my d&c i had on Dec 17. The nurse said that i will be considered high risk in every pregnancy that i have because of TRISOMY 2.
What the hell is that. everything i see online is no good. and the nurse had nothing to give me that was of any kind of information except the dr would call me on monday.
please help, i am a complete mess right now.
Hello everyone, I have never posted about the specifics of my miscarriage and I don't know if Im ready to yet but I want to say thankyou to you all for posting.
As I am sitting here crying reading your posts it is just all so real. I have been having a really hard time lately because this month was my DD and everyone I was pregnant with is having their babies. As we speak actually my best friend is being induced! I just don't know how to feel.
We have been trying since Oct 06. and at this point I have almost given up hope of ever carrying to term a baby of my own. DH is leaving for Afghanistan within the year again so this will be another year of no babies. Sorry for the tangent......sometimes I just feel so alone because ALL of my friend have brand new babies or are pregnant with there 1st or 2nd and we have none. I really appreciate all of you ladies! I am sorry for all of your losses.