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Thread: Things I wish I'd known about BFing before Baby Came

  1. #61

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    I wish someone would have told me that the feelings I got with let down were totally normal and I wasn't a freak or a bad mom. It contributed to me weaning when I did.

    http://www.d-mer.org

  2. #62

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    Well, it's been 15 month here at Mama's Dairy and we're still going strong. Here's my latest addition to this thread:

    I wish I would have know that some people love BFing and feel a very special magical bond with their baby because of it, and if you're not one of them it's perfectly fine. I never have enjoyed it much and felt rather ashamed of that fact. But lately I've just gotten over that. I realize I do it for my daughter's health and now, even more, for her happiness. That's good enough, I think. It doesn't have to be hazy happiness and rainbows and balloons and birds tweeting, yk? It's okay not to love it.

    But I am a bit envious of the mamas who DO really love it. It would be nice to feel that way.


  3. #63
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Posts
    13,495

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    Wonderful information. Thank you.
    Audrey (38) DH (34), Lilly (DD), Logan (DS). Breastfeeding is more than feeding. It is communication between mother and baby. It is a form of nurturing; it is an act of love.

  4. #64

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    Thank you for such an informative post. I really want to breast feed (we have to get pg first!!), but DH is having second thoughts. I think he doesn't really understand the benefits, but we have time to discuss it. Thanks again!
    Amanda 26 Trey 24...Married 12/31/07 Pregnant with #1 and #2!!!
    Praying for our two boys!!!

  5. #65

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    FIRST AND FOREMOST:
    -It'll hurt like he!! for the first week, even with a good latch.. your nipples just aren't used to having a vacuum attached to them for 6 hours a day... and if you get mastitis (like I did with both babies).. you are really in for it.
    -Be persistent... PROMISE it will all be worth it by the 1-2 month... and then the rest is a breeze :celebrate:
    MommaRhyne(25) is the PINK in her house of BLUE. DH - (25)

  6. #66

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    I wish I had known that by waiting 6-8 weeks (like all the books suggest), my baby would reject bottle feeding altogether. I'm so scared he'll be hungry when I go back to work... Next time, I'm taking my chances and introducing the bottle at 2 weeks.
    Big Brother B.J. ~~July 2008~~ Coming to save the day!

    Baby Madison ~~May 2010~~ Our sweet pea!

  7. #67

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    No one else mentioned this...I wish I'd known that bf would make me stink LOL

    Apparently, my hormones kicked into high gear with bf'ing dd. I sweated all the time. I guess that's the high metabolism, eh?
    Children: Me - 2 (19 & 14); DH - 2 (32 & 30); working on OUR first! Both tubes are confirmed open!!
    Make an ovulation ticker

  8. #68

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    This is such an informative post. I plan on going the breastfeeding route and DH is really supportive so I am doing as much research as I can now. I will be sure to spend some time in here as well. Thanks ladies!

    Mommy to Piper 6/5/09 and an 11/2011
    Make a pregnancy ticker

  9. #69

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    This may have been mentioned before, but I wish I'd known how much WORRY comes with BF'ing! Worry about supply, is LO getting enough and gaining enough weight? Those kinds of worries.

    Oh, and what to expect when they have an appetite/growth spurt. Just plan to keep your boob out and ready to go at any given moment. No lie. No exaggeration. Better yet, just find some way to secure your baby's mouth to your boob 24 hours a day during those spurts (though a good latch from LO may just do the trick).

  10. #70
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    Posts
    12,626

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    I wish I knew that our GSs will be eternal - then I'd develop a way of securing my DD's mouth to my booby 24/7!!!
    Miss T (10.17.2008) Miss A(06.30.2012) Flipper #3 due 06.2014
    Follow my blog on Facebook

  11. #71

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    I never knew how rewarding it would be to BF. I cried A LOT in the beginning because of pain but in about 2 weeks that was gone. I now feel like I am giving the best of me to a little person that depends on me for survival.

    I never knew how hard it would be to watch someone else feed my baby (ebm of course). BTW it has only happened twice and both times were DH...now Adam wont even take the bottle...and that make me happy because I know he wants me.
    Sharon(28)~DH-Mark(28)~Married 9/24/2005~DS-Adam ~10/4/2008DD-Claire~7/27/2010

  12. #72

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    I wish I had known you could buy D vitamin for infants without the other ones. My pedi only recommended a multi vitamin and after forcing my baby to take something she hated, a lovely mama told me about "Just D" I found another one called Carlson's D for infants. It is so easy to give to her now. I put one drop on my nipple and she sucks it right off while having her milkies!


  13. #73

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    I really wish someone had told me there really is no "right way" to BF. What I mean is, I'd heard it was hard, said "meh, I can take it, my kid's never getting formula". When I discovered I had low supply and had to supplement with formula, I felt like a failure 100%. Despite the supplementation, we're still breastfeeding almost 10 months later. I wouldn't have it any other way.
    Kate, mama to Madi (4/18/08) and Jacob (10/8/10)


  14. #74

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    Quote Originally Posted by Luna View Post
    I really wish someone had told me there really is no "right way" to BF. What I mean is, I'd heard it was hard, said "meh, I can take it, my kid's never getting formula". When I discovered I had low supply and had to supplement with formula, I felt like a failure 100%. Despite the supplementation, we're still breastfeeding almost 10 months later. I wouldn't have it any other way.
    Wow!!! Thank you SOOOOO much for saying this - you just nailed my experience with BF'ing so far (about 2 1/2 months in). I have had so much unjustified guilt about not being able to BF exclusively - I've often felt like I've let my LO down, and that I was 100% failure. I am SO encouraged to hear that you're still going at 10 months. And BTW - your LO is beautiful, and seems very happy and healthy.

  15. #75

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    ok so my milk supply was late coming in and on the 3rd day my lo was crying because he was so hungry .....I could hear his stomach .... I finally had to give him something ( he had already lost a lot of weight and was to the point of no wet diapers so I had to get him to eat or risk him being hospitalized) so I did give formula, but as I know this can affect supply I made it a rule to pump for 5 minutes for every ounce I gave.... and I kept putting him on the breast as much as I could and the next day my milk finally came in.... and I spent the next week feeding around the clock to get a good supply.
    Know it sometimes takes 3-7 days to get your milk in.... I thought it was so important to breastfeed so I pumped or had him on the breast every 2 hours now matter what.....
    I also found that I didn't want a lot of people around the first week til I got the whole breastfeeding thing down.... I knew what we had to do just needed to figure out how it worked best for me and my baby..... so basically I didn't have a lot of visitors and I would ask them to leave if it was feeding time again.

  16. #76

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    "bump"


    Stephmama rocks my socks.

  17. #77

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    this thread is the shiznit


    Stephmama rocks my socks.

  18. #78

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    you guys have so hit it all!

    for me....what would i have wanted to know:
    ~to ignore people in public when you are tring to be respectful about nursing
    ~that some LOs do not like to be covered up
    ~that not all women are supportive of BF....in fact some are downright nasty to you
    ~that my mom would be so unsupportive
    ~that normal people really don't care if you are nursing....
    ~that you may get emotional when you do have to pump because you are away from the baby


  19. #79

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    I wish I knew that "switching breasts every 2-3 hours" means "giving baby the same breast for 2-3 hours and then switching to another one for 2-3 hours" and NOT "feed baby every 2-3 hours"...
    I wish the nurses/doctors who told me to pump to bring my milk in told me that I should probably stop pumping after each feeding after the milk comes in.
    I wish I didn't try to put her on schedule.
    I wish I had her sleeping with me right away, instead of 2 months later after complete exhaustion and nearing serious post partum.
    I wish I knew then everything I know now...

  20. #80

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    I don't know if any of these have been posted but...I wish I knew:
    -Not to listen to the lactation consultant that told me to rent a hospital grade pump for the first month (even though I alread had a Pump In Style). She also told me to use it on the highest setting after each feeding. So unnecessary and practically made one of my nipples split in two.
    -Have snacks and drinks near where you nurse. Even if you aren't hungry when you sit down, a wave of extreme hunger/thirst can come on at any time (especially those first few weeks when you're nursing for an hour or two at a time).
    -You don't have to nurse in the nursery. Set yourself up in front of the TV and relax. Until I realized this, I felt SO isolated sitting up in the nursery for nearly 50% of the day. And, the middle of the night feedings don't seem so bad when you're watching something on the DVR. And, beware the infomercial (I was actually told this one in advance). I don't know if it was hormones or sleep deprivation but for some reason, I wanted Pro-activ, Bare Minerals, the best of 80's hair bands CD collection and the Sham-Wow in the WORST way.
    -When people tell you breast feeding should NEVER hurt, they're full of crap. There is no way you can constantly put suction on any part of your body and expect it not to hurt. But, the cheese grater on the nipple feeling does go away after a few weeks.
    -This one may not work for everyone but I wish someone had told me that I should not have visitors for the first couple of weeks. I NEEDED that time to get to know my baby, learn to nurse and sleep when I could. After a constant stream of visitors at the hospital for five days and people arriving at my house before I did on my first day home, I felt so trapped, imposed upon and frustrated. I finally had a full-on sobbing melt down and my partner told everyone to give us a couple of weeks. It was like a weight was lifted.


    Only equals can be friends.-Maya Angelou

  21. #81

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    Quote Originally Posted by Luna View Post
    I really wish someone had told me there really is no "right way" to BF. What I mean is, I'd heard it was hard, said "meh, I can take it, my kid's never getting formula". When I discovered I had low supply and had to supplement with formula, I felt like a failure 100%. Despite the supplementation, we're still breastfeeding almost 10 months later. I wouldn't have it any other way.
    I wish I would have known this also. I know this would have aloud me to be able to nurse. If I could do it all over again I would supplemented only until I had enough to feed him.



  22. #82

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    I wish I would have known that things dont always go perfectly and not every breastfeeding relationship starts with cuddling your newborn in the hospital. Sometimes it starts with buying a breast pump and trying it out in the car. But however you start and however it goes, you are still being the best mama to your baby.

  23. #83

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    I wish I knew that I needed to ask even more questions and do more research based on the OB's off-handed comment after delivery that my daughter had a high palate.
    I wish I knew that just because it looked like she was latching fine at that first breastfeeding attempt, it did not mean everything was okay.
    I wish I had been prepared for just how hard it is (physically and emotionally) to breastfeed a baby with a high palate, instead of being told that we must not be having real problems because she was gaining weight and that the pain would go away in a few weeks tops.

  24. #84
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Posts
    1,285

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    I wish I knew

    it would get easier than it was the first few weeks
    its ok to let your baby start crying if its the only way to get them to open their mouth wide enough
    *~Stephanie~*

  25. #85

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    BUMP here, too

  26. #86

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    Quote Originally Posted by Lydia View Post
    But don't worry if you never leak. Some women just don't, and it's not indicative of supply. I have a whole bunch of nursing pads that I never used and for which I'm trying to find alternative uses.
    Use them as gauze pads to stop bleeding. My MIL uses maxi pads for the same thing (they're also very absorbent).

  27. #87

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    I LOVED BFing my first son.. I got to 8 months before my milk was dried up and gone. I'm planning to BF my little bean due in October. My pain only lasted about 1 week. It took 3 days for my milk to come in, and after that, just the amount of time for the scabs to heal. After that, it was painless and wonderful.

    Things I wish I'd known:
    - Walking around the house without a shirt or bra would be more comfortable and convenient then wearing one (I'm relatively small breast size wise - so not wearing a bra was very comfortable and not having a shirt made my nipples happy.)LOL
    - Guests can be really irritating, not only did I have to put a bra and shirt on, but they usually were not BF supportive.
    - Sometimes Grandma's feelings need to be hurt. Instead of giving in to her temper tantrum to feed with a bottle (formula since I wasn't pumping yet) I should have asked her to understand my BFing goals.
    - DHs feel just as emotional post birth as moms do. But some need to help stand up to Grandma's temper tantrums and be more supportive of BFing.
    - Get a book! I Bought Dr. Sears everything you need to know Birth to age 2, and the Complete guide to breastfeeding. Between the two, I always found the knowledge to BF when I didn't know who else to ask. I didn't read the whole thing, but I used it as a reference, and it was very helpful with learning to latch even before delivery!
    - Lanolin is a wonderful invention-buy some your nipples will thank you!
    - Get over shyness! Shyness was a big part of my not making my full 1-year goal with DS.

    Thanks,
    This is fun!

  28. #88

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    Your DH is the more important person to support you. They will be the one there when you are thinking of giving up.
    Cluster feeding patterns can be different to what you expect. My baby fed for 6 hours and then slept for 6 hours....I had no idea what was going on.
    Hospital charts for recording feeding are breastfeeding unfriendly, especially cluster feeding. Mine needed to know how many ounces baby got!!!!
    Many women are very guilty because they fed their kids formula. This includes some of the nurses in the hospital. Try to get help from people who actually breastfed.
    Breastfeeding will take you out of your comfort zone. I never did anything on demand in my life!!!! I love schedule and measuring things. I was born to be a formula mommy. I concentrated these controlling impulses on counting wet and dirty diapers!
    Your mom/ mil is trying to help but could impact your nursing. She might be guilty about not breastfeeding her own children, she may still believe what she was told as a new mum (formula is great, bf is primitive) or she might just be concerned about the baby getting enough to eat (as she fed formula and her comfort zone is x no of ounces every x hours). Try to be nice but not listen. Try to get DH educated before all this starts happening.
    Normal output for the first pumping can be 3 drops. It does not mean you have no supply!!!
    Breastfeeding in a country where 85% of babies are formula fed makes you feel bad for the other babies, and a bit pushy on local forums.

  29. Default

    I wish someone had told me to check my milk for high amounts of lipase (severe soapy taste) before building up my stash and having to throw it all out.

    I wish I had known that I could have avoided tossing my freezer stash by scalding the milk before freezing. It inactivates the lipase...

    I wish i had known that I could have donated my 'soapy' frozen stash to a milk bank instead of dumping all 100 ounces...

    No more excuses... Just don't quit!

  30. #90

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    (With my frist baby) I wish I had known how much I would miss it when she was weaned.



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