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Thread: Puppy Paws

  1. #1
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    Default Puppy Paws

    I went to my first homeschool conference this weekend. It was fantastic! One workshop was about helping children be engaged in learning. The speaker shared this analogy about kids, and I thought it was great for moms in general, so decided to share here! She had a stuffed toy dog with her on stage that had the huge paws that puppies (especially large breeds) tend to have.

    Puppy Paws- the traits in our kids we find awkward or annoying will become valuable parts of their personality later. No one makes fun or tries to train out the awkward size of a puppy's paws. We cherish them knowing the puppy will grow into them nicely. Do the same with your kids.- Diane Waring
    I know there are personality quirks or traits about my kids that drive me bonkers some days (or sometimes EVERY day). But I thought this was a neat way to look at it. From now on I will be calling those quirks "puppy paws".

  2. #2
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    Cute term, and how great to have a reminder of this. DD1 was very reluctant to try new things as a toddler and preschooler. It sometimes drove me nuts as it was like pulling teeth to do or try *anything* new. As she has gotten older, I see this as a positive trait: she does not jump on the bandwagon when she is around kids doing risky activities and she is her own person with a strong sense of what she wants to accomplish because of her own ideas and not what others think she should do. I hope this personality trait stays with her through the teen years as it will help her navigate and make good decisions in situations where peer pressure is an issue.

    ~ Cassie, mama to Madison (8), Ali (4) & Wesley (new dude!)


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    Love that! I put it on my FB.
    Natalie [31] DH [40] 9/01, 1/06 NaturallyNatalie's Hair Accessories!

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    Oh I love that analogy! Thanks for sharing!
    Jennifer


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    i love Diane Waring! Who else did you hear/ who was keynote? I havent been to a conference in ages. probably 6yrs or more.

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    Quote Originally Posted by runningmomofmany View Post
    i love Diane Waring! Who else did you hear/ who was keynote? I havent been to a conference in ages. probably 6yrs or more.
    Yeah, she was great.
    I was only able to go to one day (MIL backed out of watching the kids last minute). The two other classes I went to were "Getting Started and the Homeschool Law" with Charles Nettles, and "Exploring Your Homeschool Options" by Amelia Harper. Honestly, I wish I had chosen different classes, even though they were good. I am just starting homeschooling, but I have researched enough, and know enough homeschoolers that those classes didn't give me much new information. Diane Waring's class was for general audience rather than just beginners and I got a lot out of it.

    Keynote speaker was Dr. Anthony B. Bradley. That was the highlight of the day for me. One of his points was that we push our children (and ourselves) to HAVE to be "extraordinary". Its not enough to do our personal best, even if its "just good", we have to be special! gifted! unique!, etc. We are taught to somehow stand out among the crowd. We have the mentality that if we end up with a normal job, with a normal family, living in a small town, etc., that we have somehow failed, are "settling", or are inadequate. It puts a lot of pressure on our children, and we have young adults out there feeling shamed because they can't figure out how to break out and "be a star". He said our society is built on regular people who are doing their best, and are living quiet, average, hardworking, honorable, beautiful lives, full of meaning and purpose. So we should be proud of our children, regardless. Teach them first to live moral lives, rather than extraordinary ones.
    I loved that.

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    Quote Originally Posted by KC's wifey View Post
    Keynote speaker was Dr. Anthony B. Bradley. That was the highlight of the day for me. One of his points was that we push our children (and ourselves) to HAVE to be "extraordinary". Its not enough to do our personal best, even if its "just good", we have to be special! gifted! unique!, etc. We are taught to somehow stand out among the crowd. We have the mentality that if we end up with a normal job, with a normal family, living in a small town, etc., that we have somehow failed, are "settling", or are inadequate. It puts a lot of pressure on our children, and we have young adults out there feeling shamed because they can't figure out how to break out and "be a star". He said our society is built on regular people who are doing their best, and are living quiet, average, hardworking, honorable, beautiful lives, full of meaning and purpose. So we should be proud of our children, regardless. Teach them first to live moral lives, rather than extraordinary ones.
    I loved that.
    Sorry you didn't get to go to more classes!!

    Dr. Bradley's message is great, I love someone is putting it out there!

    One of the most liberating things I figured out for myself that normal/plain/ordinary is perfectly fine and even desirable to me. I definitely had that push as a kid to fulfill my "giftedness" and I embraced that for a long time--until it just wasn't working for me anymore. It was hard to accept, but so wonderful. I have a simple life in a small town that I love and I wouldn't change that.
    Natalie [31] DH [40] 9/01, 1/06 NaturallyNatalie's Hair Accessories!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Geneari View Post
    Sorry you didn't get to go to more classes!!

    Dr. Bradley's message is great, I love someone is putting it out there!

    One of the most liberating things I figured out for myself that normal/plain/ordinary is perfectly fine and even desirable to me. I definitely had that push as a kid to fulfill my "giftedness" and I embraced that for a long time--until it just wasn't working for me anymore. It was hard to accept, but so wonderful. I have a simple life in a small town that I love and I wouldn't change that.
    Yes! It was really refreshing to hear, both for myself and for my kids. Parents have pressure to "make" their kids superstars, because they feel that is a reflection on them.

    He noted that this is a result of the values our society holds like individualism and narcissism. Love yourself above all, get as much attention as you can, don't let others see your flaws, etc.

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    That is a great message. I have heard both from homeschool/religious leaders. Even a former pastor who was well known in the early homeschooling years perpetuated, probably still does, the dont-settle-for-average mind set. His children, mostly adults now, are doing amazing things. Authors (I would guess if you were a christian as a teen you have read this guy's books on dating, lol. wanna guess who?) Pastor of a well known mega church, director of a music school, students of Harvard law school...

    It is nice to hear that homeschoolers can also just be ordinary people living their quiet lives.

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    I agree that both messages are important. Everyone has to decide for themselves at some point what is important to them. I don't think there's anything less valid with ambition and drive to be highly successful in any (non-illegal) field. It just seems like we're not often offered the simpler life option as valid. Or when we talk about the highly successful option, the downsides are glossed over: how much sacrifice is involved, how much work it takes, what level of education or financing is required. We should be openly talking about how different life choices might play out and what sorts of values and ideals we want to emphasize and how our life paths can achieve or hinder those values.

    I think as a parent it must be very difficult to guide your kids through these things. I can't wait. lol
    Natalie [31] DH [40] 9/01, 1/06 NaturallyNatalie's Hair Accessories!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Geneari View Post
    I agree that both messages are important. Everyone has to decide for themselves at some point what is important to them. I don't think there's anything less valid with ambition and drive to be highly successful in any (non-illegal) field. It just seems like we're not often offered the simpler life option as valid. Or when we talk about the highly successful option, the downsides are glossed over: how much sacrifice is involved, how much work it takes, what level of education or financing is required. We should be openly talking about how different life choices might play out and what sorts of values and ideals we want to emphasize and how our life paths can achieve or hinder those values.

    I think as a parent it must be very difficult to guide your kids through these things. I can't wait. lol
    I agree with all of this. I think as parents its important to pay attention to what the child wants, rather than what we (or culture) want them to be. The motive is important. Is it something that is a passion? Or is it for other people's praise, approval and/or attention?

    There is beauty and worth in the ordinary. I don't think culturally we accept that, though.

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