DH and I have a bit of a different philosophy when it comes to discipline. He is one of those, "the reason kids are the way they are is because they are too coddled" and I don't necessarily coddle but I believe in taking away something or not earning a certain reward but still giving them an opportunity to earn others. His father was very strict and didn't show a lot of affection. He is very different now. Also I should mention DH is Mia's step father but in her life since she was 1. We also have a 14 month old son together. He treats her like his own. For example, Mia (5years old) wasn't listening while DH had her and I was at work. She lost her episode of Berensteins bears she usually gets before bed. I got home and she wanted to take a walk with me like we do often. I love our walks, she shares things with me and we just talk and I love it because she's already getting that attitude about her and she's growing up so fast. I worry how long it'll be before she's a teenager and Mom isn't cool anymore so I cherish any time we get to spend together. Plus I work full time so she is dying to spend time with me when I get home. We have morning/afternoon together and then when I get home at night before bed. She goes to pre k in afternoon so it works out. DH feels like she wasn't behaving, it's to bed at 8 (before I get home) and no walk/no episode. He is a very loving father so I don't want anyone to think he's not but we disagree so much when it comes to that stuff. I feel like it's important to provide structure and discipline but I also think love and attention is just as important. How do you find a balance when you disagree? Also, what sort of discipline methods do you use? She's got an attitude and can be downright grumpy some days, also has some sensory issues with noises so she here irritated easily which makes things incredibly difficult some days. We both lose our patience with it and the one Dr we saw feels a lot of it is not sensory, but more her wanting to control.
There are so many situations where he just feels so harsh. She's still only 5. I worry too that he will try to be even more harsh with Coop because he is a boy. That makes me crazy.