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Thread: 21M old asks for food but does not eat it

  1. #1
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    Default 21M old asks for food but does not eat it

    So DD3 is driving us batty with asking for foods but then not eating them at all and asking for more or something else. I know she is VERY young to even be asking for food let alone realize that you need to finish what we just made before asking for more. But we also can't keep giving her food that she isn't eating.

    How would you handle this? She is very smart so she might understand the concept of "finish this first then I will give you that" but maybe not IDK. She sometimes will ask for something and hear her sister ask for something else and then she will want that. Sometimes she will just ask and then when you bring it to her she says "noooooo!!!!!" And throws a tantrum. Sometimes she will eat a few bites and then bring the plate back to me asking for something else. It really varies. Regardless, if we say no she FLIPS. She isn't subtle with her wants and needs
    Thing 1 (8), Thing 2 (5), Thing 3 (2)

  2. #2

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    If you know for sure she won't eat it maybe put a little tiny piece of it on her plate so she won't be angry but, you aren't wasting food. We do this with Sophia.
    *** Lindsay ***



  3. #3

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    There are lots of ways to handle food--we are still struggling with it with our 7 year old. You can offer her something else or if you're trying to teach her to eat what is given, you can say something like I'm sorry but this is what you're having and you don't have to eat it but we won't give you something else. You could offer her a bigger variety of things that you can save for later if she doesn't eat, like make a platter of things you think she'll choose from. It's so frustrating having lots of ways you could approach this but I suggest picking one response and sticking with it as she grows up so eventually she'll learn what to expect.

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by mom2CodySophia0811 View Post
    If you know for sure she won't eat it maybe put a little tiny piece of it on her plate so she won't be angry but, you aren't wasting food. We do this with Sophia.
    Sometimes this backfires because we end up having to get up and down like 8 times to keep getting her more! Also, lots of times it's a fruit that once you cut into turns brown so I hate to not use it all. I usually give her half and apple or pear and save the other half whole so it's only brown on the 1 side.

    Quote Originally Posted by daylilies View Post
    There are lots of ways to handle food--we are still struggling with it with our 7 year old. You can offer her something else or if you're trying to teach her to eat what is given, you can say something like I'm sorry but this is what you're having and you don't have to eat it but we won't give you something else. You could offer her a bigger variety of things that you can save for later if she doesn't eat, like make a platter of things you think she'll choose from. It's so frustrating having lots of ways you could approach this but I suggest picking one response and sticking with it as she grows up so eventually she'll learn what to expect.
    It's true my other kids do it too but with them I will just say, "I'm not getting you that until you finish what you have" and they get it. She is too little to understand that. All she knows is she isn't getting what she wants and loses it lol. I suppose she will learn if we are just persistent with it. I like the platter idea although she tends to not like things on the same plate. Like if I gave her some grapes and she asks for apple I will add a few to her bowl of grapes and she gets very upset and will hand the whole bowl back to me. She is a nutty kid lol.
    Thing 1 (8), Thing 2 (5), Thing 3 (2)

  5. #5
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    I wonder if there's a disconnect (not necessarily in a bad sense at all) between what she's thinking and what she sees. Can you show her pictures of the food before bringing it to see if that's what she really wants?
    Natalie [31] DH [40] 9/01, 1/06 NaturallyNatalie's Hair Accessories!

  6. #6

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    My second one who is also very very smart does this all the time. I can't figure out why but sometimes I feel it is a control thing, sometimes he changes his mind... but it is sure wasteful and annoying.
    KEVIN (6) & MATTHEW (4)

  7. #7

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    Nathan is very much like this. Invariably he will not eat what's on his plate, but he wants (and will eat) off my plate -- no one else's, just mine -- so we've kind of taken the attitude that as long as he eats, we're not going to worry about it. When David was that age, our doctor at that time said not to turn food/mealtime into a battle because it will create problems for the rest of his life. I've lived by that rule as much as possible even though it does get annoying at times.
    Lynne, Grandma to three beautiful girls and one handsome little man!


  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by Geneari View Post
    I wonder if there's a disconnect (not necessarily in a bad sense at all) between what she's thinking and what she sees. Can you show her pictures of the food before bringing it to see if that's what she really wants?
    It's possible she doesn't truly know that when she says "pear" she knows what she is getting. She usually does though. Sometimes she will make me open the fridge and she will stand there like a teenager trying to decide lol. But she will find something and point to it and say it (pear, apple, grapes) and then she will get it and not eat it. I have thought of that as a possibility and I suppose it could be the case.

    I should add this is mostly with snacks but she does do it with meals too.

    As I mentioned part of the problem is she will see her sister ask for something else and then she will abandon what she has in favor of that. I can't handle how wasteful it is!
    Thing 1 (8), Thing 2 (5), Thing 3 (2)

  9. #9

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    My 3 year old does it. It is really annoying but I roll with it. I let him know that I wish he wouldn't do it, but the reality is that he is so tiny, I just want him to EAT. He gets a lot of leeway. Lol. Luckily I drink a lot of smoothies so at least his fruit never gets wasted.

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