I do think offensive comments should be addressed whether that is the intent or not. Just because someone is not meaning to offend by what they are saying doesn't mean it isn't damaging or hurtful. Like people who say awful things to parents who have lost children. They never mean to hurt the person - it's quite the opposite but really some of the comments I have heard people report are downright cruel! I think pointing it out in whatever way you choose at least lets the person realize it's not a nice comment and maybe they will not say it to others. I just don't always feel like being the person to point it out in this case. The comments I listed are varying degrees of offensive some highly and some not at all....

I think the worst offenders of the gender divide and applying certain stereotypes to girls and boys are people who have one of each. From my observation, they tend to see them as girl vs boy and not 2 children with different personalities. Any differences between them tend to get applied to their gender. For me, having 3 girls, I can see how each child is VERY different and their differences get applied to their personalities not gender. If DD3 were a boy I would probably be applying a lot of her behavior to being a boy. She is wild, a major climber, very bold and physical. I am sure if she had been a boy I would just be thinking it was due to that. I hear SO many people comment about their boys being the ones who climb onto tables, couches, out of the crib, etc. And sure it may be a biological thing but having 3 of the same I can see how these traits are not gender-specific.

And in my experience, it's been those people who make the most generalizations because their girl is one way and their boy is another so therefore all girls are that way and all boys are the other way. And since they have one of each they somehow feel qualified to make these distinctions.

I also think it has to do with the personality of the parents. I was not a rebellious, hormonal teen and I think my brother gave my parents more trouble than I did. Whatever. The teen years will be what they are.....