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Thread: Birth Day

  1. #1

    Default Birth Day

    I lost my son, John, in January at 16 weeks gestation. After attending many supprt groups I thought I had a good handle on my miscarriage. However, as his anticipated "Birth Date" approaches I am becoming so sad and anxious. No friends or family have remembered this special day. I am desperately trying to find a way to commemorate his day. Any suggestions out there?

  2. #2

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    I didn't want to read and not respond, though I don't really have any suggestions. With my miscarriages (they were earlier than yours), I didn't commemorate my due date at all, really. I just tried to get through the day as best I could.

    I'm so sorry for your loss.



  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jul 2011
    Location
    Michigan
    Posts
    9,225

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    I'm so very very sorry to hear of your loss (((huge hugs))) !!

    My son Asher was delivered at 19wks but died sometime between the 16th and 17th wk. Dh takes me out to dinner on the anniversary of his delivery day ever year (it's on Veteran's Day...Nov 11th). For the first 4yrs I did remember his due date...usually by doing something fun with the kids but on the 5th due date anniversary my 3yr old dd was born almost 3wks early. Now, I can't think of a better way to honor Asher than to celebrate the birth of his little sister but he still gets his special day on his actual birthday in Nov. I feel like he's with us everyday in spirit...rarely does a day go by I don't think of him and his brother Joash (delivered at 15wks about 9months later).

    Some things I've thought about doing is getting a necklace or bracelet with my lost babies' birthstones, having a plaque engraved, and lighting a candle for them on the special days and holidays throughout the year when I'm especially thinking about them.

    Some things I've done: planted a garden in their honor, had their initials subtly added to our family tree (my sil painted it), dinner with dh on their birthdays, and fun activities on their due dates to remember their sweet lives and not the grief of their death.

    Breaks my heart that any of us have to go through this ! I can't say enough how sorry I am...my heart absolutely goes out to you !!

  4. #4

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    I'm so sorry for your loss.
    Melissa (41), DH Matt (41), & DS Mason (5)
    MC#1, 5 weeks, 3/2007 ~ MC#2, 6 weeks, 5/2007 ~ MC#3, 9 weeks, 5 days, 7/15/2013

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
    Location
    Chicagoland/NWI
    Posts
    692

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    I made myself a beaded charm with pink, blue and clear crystals and a butterfly for our lost twin. I carry it with me every day. We don't celebrate the twin, as we have our DD to celebrate outwardly, but I pray for him/her and know that he/she is in heaven.
    Phoebe Grace 6-22-11; 37.5" and 26.2# at 2 years old! She is my wild child!
    Me & Geoff, 40; DD Phoebe, our June Bug

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