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Thread: Thoughts on getting tubes tied

  1. #1
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    Default Thoughts on getting tubes tied

    So before we started having kids, DH said once we were done he would get a vasectomy. He said it would be easier for him to get it done, less invasive, less side effects, etc...made sense. So, here we are, twins will be here next week and he has made every excuse in the world not to do it, to do it later, blah blah blah...

    Well today when I was signing consents for my csection next week the surgical coordinator was trying to sell me on getting my tubes tied. I just don't feel it is the best thing to do, we agree we are done completely, I just worry about the side effects of messing with things in there. I don't want to end up with whackadoodle periods, awful hormonal changes, or anything like that. Also from what I have read so far the vasectomy is more effective and there is risk of ectopic pregnancy with the tubal ligation.

    I mean it does make total sense to do it while they are in there, but I also don't want to make a rush decision on this either.

    Thoughts?


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    No personal experience but my MIL had one in her 30's and regretted it. It messed up her cycles really bad (granted this was 25 years ago so things might be be different). But so much so that she had told us that once we were done, her son was to get fixed and not me. (this was all before we realized we were dealing with IF).

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  3. #3

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    My dh had planned on a vasectomy. When I found out I'd be having a c-section I decided to go ahead with a tubal ligation instead just because it would have been paid for 100% by insurance and they were already in there. Biggest mistake ever. I've even thought of having it reversed. I have had nothing but health problems since having it done.
    Mary Jane, doula and mom of Vada, Brynna, Tea, Moira, Kyan, Ambria, Aslan, and Anakin.
    “Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.” ~ Dr. Seuss

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    My mom had one, when she was in her 20s. She had no complications from it.

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    I had one after my last daughter was born. No complications. Best thing I ever did.


  6. #6

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    I had three c-sections and with my third I would have had a tubal ligation, BUT I delivered at Catholic Hospital and they do not perform them. Actually, all three of my children were born at Catholic hospitals, so I couldn't have had one done during any of my deliveries if I wanted to.

    After a lot of discussion, DH finally agreed to having a vasectomy. It was the least invasive procedure for either of us (my options are very limited with BC due to having high BP and a blood clotting disorder), and we needed something permanent. I was with him during the entire procedure, and the worst part for him was the 2 rounds of numbing shots. It went fairly quickly, and he was actually surprised when they said they were finished. His recovery time was short (he was only really down one day, but didn't over-do it for a week). We both agree that the vasectomy was definitely the way to go for us, and let me just tell you, this is coming from a man who was less than thrilled about "having his manhood operated on". He was even having second thoughts just days before the procedure.

    So, I would go with the vasectomy if I were you. Good luck with whatever you decide!

    ETA: I was shocked that it only cost us the copay out of pocket, too. $40 for permanent BC. Not too bad!
    Last edited by sparks3; 05-02-2013 at 11:14 AM.




  7. #7

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    Despite having struggled for 3+ years to get pregnant, I decided to have my tubes tied when I had to have surgery for an ovarian cyst (we were done and did not want an oops we thought we were infertile baby). That was 2 1/2 years ago and I've had zero complications. My sister had her tubes tied about 16 months ago, same OB, and she's had zero complications.
    Our mom had her tubes tied after having me, I'm not sure if it was during the surgery or not (all 3 of us girls were born via c-section). She didn't have any issues until she got remarried when I was 8 and they decided to try to have a baby. She had her tubes repaired. She got pregnant but it ended up being a tubal and she lost the baby and that tube.
    Last edited by MomOfAnOnly; 05-02-2013 at 12:01 PM.

  8. #8
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    I considered it since I had a c/s but chose not to after I learned about post-tubal ligation syndrome. I asked my OB if she thought it was real and she said she gets about 2 patients a year with it. DH would never have vasectomy (he has always felt this way and I respect that). I am glad I did not do it because I have been getting the baby fever lately and I am almost 40 and have felt "done" up until a few months ago. Not sure if we are ever going to have another but I think it would be very hard on me right emotionally if I did go through with it.

  9. #9
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    I had mine done after I had my son. He wasn't a C-section so i had it done right before my 6 weeks was up and i went back to work. It was super easy and i haven't had any complications, but i've since gotten divorced and re-married and we want another baby. I realize now that at 25 i shouldn't have had it done, even though i was sure at the time i was done regardless of circumstances. It's been nice not having to worry about BC, but it's about to cost us a pretty penny to have it reversed and then that's not a guarantee.
    ~Kim~Kaylee~Kai~

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    Quote Originally Posted by KimJ View Post
    I had mine done after I had my son. He wasn't a C-section so i had it done right before my 6 weeks was up and i went back to work. It was super easy and i haven't had any complications, but i've since gotten divorced and re-married and we want another baby. I realize now that at 25 i shouldn't have had it done, even though i was sure at the time i was done regardless of circumstances. It's been nice not having to worry about BC, but it's about to cost us a pretty penny to have it reversed and then that's not a guarantee.
    This was me except I do not regret getting mine done. I had a vaginal birth and went back six weeks later what I hated was they did not do it right after birth and the thing it did mess up for me was breastfeeding. I was told to pump and dump for 24 hours but, I've heard several things on that. Cost wise was a no brainier for us I am on Medicaid it covers it. If you aren't on Medicaid it can be more costly than the big V. However at the same time I would not want to wait around on my husband going back and fourth. My periods have gotten somewhat heavier but, the went back to they way they were when I was teen which was heavy. I didn't know it because I had been on birth control so long. However, to me that's a small price to pay. So JMHO I would have it done when they are going to be operation on you anyways.
    Last edited by hotpinkmomma0811; 05-02-2013 at 12:13 PM.



  11. #11
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    Since you are having a c-section, some of the risk is already assumed, rather than it being a separate procedure. However, tubals still have a higher risk of severe and sometimes permanent side effects. It may go perfectly without any problems at all, but the risk is still higher than with a vasectomy. For that reason, if it were my decision, I would want my DH to stick to the original plan.

  12. #12

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    I had mine done during my last c/s 19m ago mostly because I just didn't feel I had a choice. Another pregnancy just wasn't an option. I'm still sad about it, but resinged that it was the right choice. I have had no strange problems from it. Lots of men also have problems post vasectomy, so I think in that regards its a toss up between the partners who will take the risk. I just had it done during the c/s 'because they were in there anyway" and the effects are immediate, where in a vas there is a period of time they are still fertile. Also in my case it was me who couldn't have another baby. If for some reason DH ended up married again he could still have another child (or same for me, if I got remarried I still can't have another baby).

    I had mine done at a Catholic hospital, my OB had to take my case before an ethics committee for their approval. So I had to decide far in advance. I wouldn't have had the option a week before. Part of me wishes that I had waited until a few months after delivery because it was very tough emotionally to be postpartum and dealing with the loss of my fertility.

  13. #13

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    We were done when my twins arrived, and there's NWIH I was going to get a tubal. There are too many horror stories w/them, and you know what? I carried 3 kids, went through 36 hours of labor and two c-sections. It seemed only fair that he be the one to deal w/the long-term fertility solution. He got his vasectemy about a month and a half ago, and it was really easy. Getting the numbing shot hurt, but after that, he was fine. He even watched the surgery because he's weird like that. For the first few days afterward, he had no pain at all. Then for about a week, he had a dull ache, which went away. And he's totally back to normal.

    So I guess what I'm saying is your DH needs to suck it up because a tubal is a lot more likely to cause problems than a V.



  14. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by mla View Post
    We were done when my twins arrived, and there's NWIH I was going to get a tubal. There are too many horror stories w/them, and you know what? I carried 3 kids, went through 36 hours of labor and two c-sections. It seemed only fair that he be the one to deal w/the long-term fertility solution. He got his vasectemy about a month and a half ago, and it was really easy. Getting the numbing shot hurt, but after that, he was fine. He even watched the surgery because he's weird like that. For the first few days afterward, he had no pain at all. Then for about a week, he had a dull ache, which went away. And he's totally back to normal.

    So I guess what I'm saying is your DH needs to suck it up because a tubal is a lot more likeily to cause problems than a V.


    I was going to say something similar to this as well. Considering all women go through to bring children into the world, men should be happily volunteering to step up for the V when its time.

  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by KimJ View Post
    I had mine done after I had my son. He wasn't a C-section so i had it done right before my 6 weeks was up and i went back to work. It was super easy and i haven't had any complications, but i've since gotten divorced and re-married and we want another baby. I realize now that at 25 i shouldn't have had it done, even though i was sure at the time i was done regardless of circumstances. It's been nice not having to worry about BC, but it's about to cost us a pretty penny to have it reversed and then that's not a guarantee.
    *** first off to the original poster I had it done worst mistake ever, horrible AF, cramping , heavy , clots you make it, horrible 16 years later reversed pg 6 wks post op have baby girl now 4 best thing I ever did, 1 because I have her n 2 because my cycles lightened up, less clotting, shorter AF days, waaaay less cramping during AF.
    **** Kim where are you going to have yours reversed?

  16. #16
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    Thanks for the insight ladies! I really am not feeling it, and the surgical coordinator was a bit pushy about it too. Time to sit down and talk to DH again....


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    I have found that they do often get pushy about c-section + tubes tied when it's not your first. Nothing was ever brought up with Keira or Scharae-but there was no reason to believe I would have a section and they were born at a Catholic hospital which did not routinely perform tubals. Less than 18 months later (in other words, I was still well under 30 and not an age that could be considered "at your age we would expect/suggest) when it became apparent that I would be likely delivering quite early and having a c-section very possibly I was asked about a tubal up one side and down the other. Didn't matter how many times I said no-I was admitted to the hospital at least 6 times before she was born-I was asked.

    I did have my tubes tied almost 2 years ago after our 5th baby. I did not have it done in conjunction with a surgery. I was 4 months post partum and we were done. Our insurance covered both a vasectomy and tubal at the same price (copay only). My OB talked to us about him having a V but we decided against that. Yes, I'd been through a LOT including nearly dying with the 5th baby. But for us, bottom line was as a couple WE were done having kids. If he passed away and I remarried it would be unwise for me to try and have more because of circumstances with my body. But if I died and he remarried there is no reason he shouldn't have more kids, physically. So for us, a vasectomy did not make sense.

    As for post-ligation, I've not really had any issues. My periods have gotten progressively shorter for the last year-for the first year they were text book normal for me in length, flow, cramping, etc. I've had no lingering issues at all. I opted to not have the clamps they typically use because my body seems to attach any "foreign" object in that area so I had large lengths of the Fallopian tubes removed and have been totally happy with it.

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  18. #18

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    It surprises me to hear that doctors and staff pushed tubal ligation. I had mine done during the birth of my 8th child. I was 30 years old and was having my second c-section with a vertical incision, and my doctor never asked. I asked, and he encouraged me to take my time and reconsider. I should have listened to him.
    Mary Jane, doula and mom of Vada, Brynna, Tea, Moira, Kyan, Ambria, Aslan, and Anakin.
    “Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.” ~ Dr. Seuss

  19. #19

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    Yeah that is sad that drs are pushing it "because they'll already be in there." They must get paid a pretty penny to do 2 surgeries in 1.

    I was the one who brought up to my OB that I was thinking about having my tubes tied during the surgery to remove a cyst. He discussed the options (clamped, cut, etc.) and then said I needed to sign a form stating that I wanted it done, and then we had to wait 30 days after that before they would actually do the surgery. That gives women the time they need to reconsider.

  20. #20

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    I talked to my midwife about this bc there's a good chance I won't be able to VBAC & will need a section. She was very supportive of the tubal, she said *most* women who complain of heavy periods and cramping have been on hormonal BC their entire adult lives. They don't know what a regular period is like anyway. Makes complete sense to me. If I am able to birth vaginally, DH will get snipped. If I have a section, I will have a tubal, as well. Both procedures come with risks.

  21. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by midgetlb6 View Post
    **** Kim where are you going to have yours reversed?
    East Coast Tubal Reversal Center in Charlottesville VA most likely. There's also a place that specializes in NC but the one in VA is closer to home.
    ~Kim~Kaylee~Kai~

  22. #22

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    I am doing it when I have my section(during this baby delivery). The effectiveness of them doing it when in there is a lot higher(per my OB) if they do it when they are in there, versus laparascopically. The effectiveness is also higher than a vasectomy...and vasectomies don't come without side effects either. I have two friend's who's husbands got one and both ended up with infections that kept coming back for an entire year and one of them had to have a repeat surgery to go in and clear something or other out.

    I asked my doc about side effects from tube tying and she said...seriously? I have no patients complain of anything from it.

    my thoughts are this...i know I am DONE DONE having kids. so i have no problem doing it...

    Quote Originally Posted by Scarlett View Post
    So before we started having kids, DH said once we were done he would get a vasectomy. He said it would be easier for him to get it done, less invasive, less side effects, etc...made sense. So, here we are, twins will be here next week and he has made every excuse in the world not to do it, to do it later, blah blah blah...

    Well today when I was signing consents for my csection next week the surgical coordinator was trying to sell me on getting my tubes tied. I just don't feel it is the best thing to do, we agree we are done completely, I just worry about the side effects of messing with things in there. I don't want to end up with whackadoodle periods, awful hormonal changes, or anything like that. Also from what I have read so far the vasectomy is more effective and there is risk of ectopic pregnancy with the tubal ligation.

    I mean it does make total sense to do it while they are in there, but I also don't want to make a rush decision on this either.

    Thoughts?

    Jenny~ Mama to Katelyn(7), Ben(my angel in Heaven, 6), Megan(5), Allie(2years), Nora(8m)

  23. #23

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    this, this is what my OB told me too...
    Quote Originally Posted by Chayah View Post
    I talked to my midwife about this bc there's a good chance I won't be able to VBAC & will need a section. She was very supportive of the tubal, she said *most* women who complain of heavy periods and cramping have been on hormonal BC their entire adult lives. They don't know what a regular period is like anyway. Makes complete sense to me. If I am able to birth vaginally, DH will get snipped. If I have a section, I will have a tubal, as well. Both procedures come with risks.

    Jenny~ Mama to Katelyn(7), Ben(my angel in Heaven, 6), Megan(5), Allie(2years), Nora(8m)

  24. #24

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    sometimes I think docs are wrong and can be pushy, but in this isntance...if you trust your doc, i would believe otherwise. Mine asks me every single visit if i've changed my mind just to be sure about how I feel about it and not forcing me to do it. Basically just telling me that if I want to do it, the best outcome is during the section, not after...which i can't deny her. I would really think hard about it...

    Jenny~ Mama to Katelyn(7), Ben(my angel in Heaven, 6), Megan(5), Allie(2years), Nora(8m)

  25. #25

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    I had mine done with my second c-section. It was very easy and I have had no complications.


  26. #26

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    I had my tubal 9 months post partum. I had a c-section delivery but it was baby number 1 so doc didn't give me the option of a tubal during the section. No side effects or complications at all. My periods have remained the same as far as everything is concerned, including cramping and flow. Don't regret it a bit and I'm glad I did it.

  27. #27

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    Y'all have given me a lot to think about. I was pretty sure I was going to get my tubes tied when we were done having kids. I read somewhere along the line that having your tubes tied reduces your risk of ovarian cancer. I figured with all my Clomid cycles increasing my risk, tying my tubes would even things out. Looks like I need to look into it more. I've got time though since we are STCing #2 right now.
    Jen (34), DH (36), DS (3), Baby #2 EDD 10/21/14


    Lost a loved baby 9/2012

  28. #28
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    With baby number 3 I considered having the tubal done but I just did not feel right about it. Then a year later when I got pregnant with #4 I just felt like that we were done. So at my first OB visit I told my doc I wanted to have the tubal upon delivery since I knew it was going to be a section. We never talked about it again except the day of the delivery. Then I was asked about five times from different nurses and doctors just to be sure on their end. So far I have had 1 PP AF and it was fairly normal. But I can't say what the future will hold. I have had 4 c sections and healing from the last one was my toughest. I have to believe it was due to the tubal. But the extra pain only was minimal and I think it took me another week than normal. So, I felt physically it was a no brainier. However mentally, that was a bit tougher for me. The lose of my fertility was and is kind of sad to me. I was infertile for so long and to knowingly give my fertility up was a tough thing to face. I still have these thoughts and I am 100% positive I want no more kids.

    So all in all, I am happy I dis it. Good luck with your decision.

    Jeanne, mom to Dev0n (6) Isabe11e (5) and C0rbin (3.5) Vio1et (almost 2)


  29. #29
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    I had my tubal ligation with my last C-Section. The recovery was by far the easiest out of 3 C-Sections. I have had very awful AFs since then, however, so much that I have had uterine biopsies to rule out cancer, ultrasounds, bloodwork, and multiple offers by my OB to go back on the pill. This is not just a change from not remembering what is was like to not be on hormonal birth control, because I've gone without hormones and just used condoms in the past seven years.

    Now, I have not been able to go for walks in regional parks during several days of the month because I leak through super tampons and through the pad below them every 20 minutes and there aren't bathrooms spaced closely enough on the trails. I don't get frequent enough breaks at work to deal with this issue. In the past year, it's gotten a little better, and I have discovered Super-Plus tampons (which I never knew existed), and I use a night-time pad for the breakthrough bleeding that invariably occurs when I can't change the tampons within 30 minutes during the heaviest days. My AFs last for 7-8 days, and come every 25 days. This month, for some horrible reason, I only got a week of no bleeding before it came again. On the bright side, everything has gotten incrementally better over the past year, aside from the discovery of extra-large tampons.

    I was well-aware of post-tubal-ligation syndrome before I had mine. I thought it was more common with women who were more affected by hormonal fluctuations, and since I never had an ounce of PMS, I didn't think I was a candidate. I have not taken the birth control pills that were offered. I have also read that the problems tend to be most severe in the first 3 years following a tubal, and after 5 years there is no statistical difference between women who have had a tubal and women who have not, as far as symptoms go (to the best of my recollection). So, as I have said, there has been an unpleasant lifestyle impact on me, but it has been slightly lessened lately and I'm holding out hope that it will continue to get better. I'm also 43 and don't know if any of this might be related to perimenopausal changes.

    In any case, I would probably opt for the vasectomy if I had to do it again. I would just set up the appointment and have my dh go, and not leave it in his hands to make the actual appointment.


  30. #30

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    My dh is getting a vasectomy in about 2.5 weeks. If I were having a C-section I might think about getting a TL done at the same time but only because the one week where dh has to take it easy after the procedure makes me nervous since he is a carpenter and the sole bread winner right now. His personality is to push through and make everyone happy-he's very self-sacrificing and hard-working, so I am going to have to call him multiple times a day to make sure he is not pushing himself. We have planned ahead and he will be taking 5 days off before going back to work also, just to be sure. The doctor was very adamant that he will feel great almost immediately but not to overdo it for a week. I am also a bit nervous about the time it takes to get all of the sperm out of his reproductive tract. We can and WILL use a backup method for up to 6 months if necessary (usually after 3 you are A-OK but...what's another 3 months in the grand scheme of things just to be super sure, kwim?) I like that the vas is less invasive and I have read about post-TL syndrome, which is why he's having it done, but the mandatory resting and post-op fertility factors about the vas make the TL option appealing if I was already going in for a section. Either way it really should be you approaching the doc about the option you feel most comfortable with, not the other way around. GL with your conversation with dh and the doc!
    Last edited by CoffeeCat; 05-04-2013 at 06:37 AM.

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