I do not understand my husband. Erin talked to the lawyer about what happened with J being so late to pick up Nathan last Friday and also about filing for child support. So I was talking to DH and he got PO'd. He says "the kid is trying. Why make it harder for him?" (meaning about filing for child support). He said "we could bend over and take Nathan to him when he can't get transportation to come get him." He said not every time, but every now and then. His view, he said, is that Erin knows what it takes to raise a child, and J does not. Erin has family support and J does not. WTH? J lives off his family 100%, so how does he not have family support?
DH says J buys Nathan clothes, he came home last visit with a new coat -- it wasn't cold when Nathan left for the visit, so Erin only had a jacket on him, but then it turned cold, so they got him a new coat -- he came home with new shoes one visit, DH said, to which I pointed out that no, Nathan went there with new shoes that he got extremely muddy and they put USED, TOO SMALL shoes on him when they brought him home. We never did get those new shoes back and had to by him another pair because the ones they sent him home in were too small. I mean, I understand J and his family provide for Nathan during his visits, but that's only what? 4 days a month? Child support is supposed to help support the child the rest of the month for food, shelter, diapers, clothing, etc. DH says "Well, Erin isn't supporting Nathan totally on her own. She has family support." I get that, I really do, but J also created this child and he is not helping to support him at all. I don't understand. I just don't understand.
Am I wrong? Am I being too hard on J?