frustrated after m/c

[Lizamay]

Hi ladies,

So I had a m/c at about 5w3d a couple weeks ago. The day after I started bleeding my hcg was already down from 229 a week before that to 58, and my progesterone was only 0.5. So I think from my calculations I must have started losing the baby pretty soon after that second hcg. And then I bled like a slightly heavier AF, which stopped over a week ago.

So the more frustrating thing is that before I got pg my RE was going to do a hysteroscopy and sis (like a hsg but with u/s and saline bubbles) and then if that was clear start femara. But now after I had a m/c, she wants me to wait 2 months before we can do any testing or treatment. They say that is their standard protocol whether I was pg for 1 day or 1 trimester. I totally get waiting awhile if your body/uterus went through a lot of changes, but it was barely more than a chemical m/c, and resolved very quickly on its own. I am just so frustrated, bc not only did we lose the baby, but now I need to wait forever for a real w/u and treatment! I just wish they would adapt their treatment based on the individual patient and their situation. My work schedule will be a lot busier in a few months, so I will not be able to have time to go to the dr (I could if I was pg, but not for ttc, and I cannot quit bc I love it). SO frustrating!!! I never imagined I wouldn't be able to get pg by then, but now it is a big reality.

But on the bright side, I am on pelvic rest for only 1 more day, and my hcg seems to be coming down relatively quickly 58-8 in 1 week, and I retest tomorrow. they want it <5. And my acupuncturist just started me on chinese herbs (to see if it works while I am waiting for the RE). The RE did not tell me not to ttc during this time, only the 2 weeks of pelvic rest and no testing or fertility treatments for 2 months.

Sorry for a long rant. Just wanted to share what was on my mind and see if anyone has had to go through similar stuff, and maybe has some hopeful stories of ttc after a m/c. It has been so heartbreaking, especially after ttc for so long before the m/c.

[kellyowens]

Oh sheesh, how frustrating ! I'm so sorry they're making you wait !!

If you do ttc again would they be willing to start you on progesterone right after o and BD to see if maybe you just need a boost? Or would you prefer to continue with the testing and meds?

The waiting stinks...it really really does Thinking of you and praying!

[kellyowens]

Oh...I don't know if it'll go this way for you or not but I usually ovulate within a few days of my hcg levels being <5...just wanted to share

[Lizamay]

Oh...I don't know if it'll go this way for you or not but I usually ovulate within a few days of my hcg levels being <5...just wanted to share

Oh Kelly I really hope I do! My cycles are so screwy that would actually be a pretty great if I actually o that early!

Re: the progesterone, I feel like my progesterone was at a pretty good level bc I was bloated, kinda constipated and my breasts were pretty sore. Plus I normal have a pretty normal lp w/o any early spotting or anything like that, and have bloating and constipation during my lp. Do you think I could still have a low progesterone or it might benefit me? I know you and many other ladies on here take progesterone supplements during lp.

[Lunarmoon]

I know some people that got a sticky BFP right after their m/c! I hope that is the case for you too!! I'm sorry that you are going through this. I know how frustrating waiting is, and I can't imagine the pain you are already going through!!

[coelh102]

Huge hugs Cycle Buddy! I don't know the answers for this but I want you to know that we are all here to support you and I for one am rooting for you just as I know you are for me! It sucks they won't change their ways for each patient. Is there another RE around you can go to? I know this is going to be a tough time for you, my heart aches that you went through all this.

[kellyowens]

Oh Kelly I really hope I do! My cycles are so screwy that would actually be a pretty great if I actually o that early!

Re: the progesterone, I feel like my progesterone was at a pretty good level bc I was bloated, kinda constipated and my breasts were pretty sore. Plus I normal have a pretty normal lp w/o any early spotting or anything like that, and have bloating and constipation during my lp. Do you think I could still have a low progesterone or it might benefit me? I know you and many other ladies on here take progesterone supplements during lp.

I think the concern isn't so much the progesterone levels at any given point as it is the body's ability to consistently maintain those levels until the placenta takes over production of progesterone around the 10th-12th week of pg. Supplementing is kind of like insurance...if for some reason progesterone levels fall rapidly (which brings on Af) then the supplemental dose is there to maintain the higher levels that keep the uterine lining intact and able to support implantation and the growing baby.

I have no idea if it would help or not but it's so noninvasive, inexpensive, and has so few side effects (mild) that it may be worth a try!

Praying for o !

[proudmommyof3]

I know some people that got a sticky BFP right after their m/c! I hope that is the case for you too!! I'm sorry that you are going through this. I know how frustrating waiting is, and I can't imagine the pain you are already going through!!

You are extremely more fertile following a M/C, so I am praying that is what happens. I am so sorry you are going through all of this. I will be praying for your miracle baby and He/She WILL come, I just know it....Huge Hugs

[Lizamay]

Thanks everybody. My HCG was down to 1.9 today, so no more needle sticks for now!!!

Cait-There are only a few other dr's in town, and only 2 that share my insurance. I saw the other one when I started bleeding and their plan was the same, so I think that I am stuck with this plan for now.

Kelly- I will definitely ask about progesterone once we start the medicated cycles (or earlier if I get a bfp before then!)

Lunarmoon and Malia- I hope I am! That would be great if I could get a sticky bean soon! I am still a little worried that I will get a bfp, have another m/c, and then the testing and treatment will be pushed back even further, but I am just trying to tell myself that the chances of that happening have to be pretty low...

Oh yeah, and I am getting so sick of people asking if we are trying or if I am pg, so rude! And yesterday we got our 1st baby shower invite since ttc. It is a couple that got married after us, so it was kind of hard to see, even though we are very happy for them.

[coelh102]

I know what you mean Liz, My best friend got pregnant by the condom breaking one time, ONE TIME! So not fair! She isn't even married, nor does she have a stable home and insurance. I too got sick of hearing people ask when we are going to start trying or if I said I didn't feel good it was, "YOUR PREGNANT!!!" All I can do it fake a laugh and say no. Even though they will continue to say, are you sure? I got pregnant on the pill! You could be! I wanted to scream at them, slap them and run away. (never did by the way). So I totally understand that, plus my friend at work is Pregnant so I am reminded everytime she walks by or complains about the baby, every 5mins she is saying the baby is doing this, the baby is doing that. People are giving her all sorts of flowers, food, what ever she wants, she gets because she is pregnant. I am not afraid to admit I am very jealous, not of her, but of the situation that she is in.

It's not fair when others get pregnant and others don't and I can't begin to understand why it happens. All I know is when that day finally comes for you, you will be a better mother, and better woman for it!

[GatorGRITS]

Honestly? I would try to TTC on my own until the RE is willing to take over. But I'm notoriously impatient

[Lizamay]

Thanks Cait, I sure hope it does and I try to remember that. I just hope it happens! But DH said is down with adoption too, so it is always nice that at least we are comfortable with either way of starting a family.

Gatorgrits- I think we will NTNP during this time, just in case my body is ready to become pg (I don't really see why it wouldn't be, since it was such an early loss) and my RE's office didnt tell me I needed protection or anything when I asked if it was ok to DTD again (and they said yes it was). I would love to have another surprise BFP before we start medicated cycles!

Well at least I am going to be pretty busy for the next few days, so hopefully that will keep my mind off of all of this for a little while at least (I hope!)

[Melturtleluv]

I second what Gatorgrits said. I can't speak from experience, but from everything I've read it sounds like you are super fertile following a mc. Go for it Liza

[beanpop]

Big hugs to you Liza. I would also keep TTC