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Thread: Peeing frequency and potty training...

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    Default Peeing frequency and potty training...

    Maiya is nearly 2 years and 10 months old. I have never, ever tried to potty train her- I'm letting her set the pace, but do model it and talk about it, so she knows what to do. I'm really in no rush at all.

    She, however, has shown interest in it on and off every few months since she was about 16 months old. Back in November / December, I thought she was potty trained, since one day she told me she wanted to wear big girl panties, and did great in them. We had a few days of no accidents at all, but then she decided, on her own, to go back to diapers. Fine by me...

    EXCEPT... During that time, she ended up with a bladder infection (which I imagine is WHY she wanted back in diapers, since she couldn't hold it as long). She had been going pee just like me- once in the mornings, once in the late afternoon / evening, and once at night. She did still have a wet diaper after waking (not sure if she pees in her sleep, or after waking but before calling me to go get her). I thought that was fine, since that's pretty much my schedule, too, until she got a bladder infection. All my IRL mommy friends tell me that the bladder infection probably has nothing to do with her infrequent peeing times, but I worry.

    Even though she is back in diapers full time (JUST starting to show interest again, though, so I want to address this before hand), she STILL holds it for hours at a time. I mean, we're talking... She pees about 9, but then not again until 4!! That's 7 hours... And she is drinking a good amount. Not as much as she does in summer, but still, she is well hydrated.

    She hasn't ended up with another bladder infection yet, but I worry that, if she goes back in big girl panties soon, she will. Because now she SOMETIMES pees in between, when she has a diaper on, but if she decides she wants to go diaper free again, I wouldn't be surprised if she goes 7 hours between peeing every single day.

    What do you ladies think? Is 7 hours too long between peeing for a not even 3 year old? If so, do you have any ideas how I can help her to go more often? I'm almost thinking I need to potty train her, I mean actually "make" her do it, just so I can "make" her pee more often. I know other moms can do it- I mean actually, really, potty train the kids, not just wait for the kid to do it on their own- so I'm guessing we could, too. I just really didn't want to do that. It sounds like a lot of work, haha, and I feel like it's better and healthier for her to learn on her own. Unless she makes herself sick!! If 7 hours is not too long, do you think it's just a coincidence that the ONLY bladder infection she's ever had in her entire life happened when she was going that long every single day?

    Thanks!



  2. #2
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    I do think it's a long time to hold it but my DS does the same. He will pee before bed at 9 PM and the next morning I have to urge him to go pee at 10 AM or later. It drives me bonkers, I worry he would get an infection - never has. But it can be different boys vs. girls. I don't really think you can "make" your child potty train. You can certainly encourage and I think that most kids are open to the encouragement but if they don't want to, they don't want to.

    How long does she go in between peeing when she is in diapers?

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    Although my son is mostly day trained, we will put him on the potty to go even if he says he doesn't have to. Not to force him to pee, but b/c often, he'll say no and then 20 minutes later, when there's no bathroom in sight, he'll tell us that he needs to go. He doesn't always have the cues to go when he should. So if we take him to the potty, he'll end up going. Problem solved.

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    I agree that it's a very long time, for anyone actually. DS is good about going to the RR on his own and was potty trained a few months after turning 2. None the less, he sometimes tells me he doesn't have to go potty in the morning when he first wakes up which I know he does. I make him go. The deal is, he can't have his morning juice until after he's gone potty which has worked well in our house. I've also realized that when he's playing, he doesn't want to go and will hold it as long as he can. When he does this, I ask him to go. He usually agrees but once in awhile his toddler self will come out and say NO! In that case, I make him go.

    DS is big with positive reinforcement though so afterward, I praise him. Before it used to be just about peeing in the big boy potty, but now the kid can do it all by himself. He even wants me to smell his hands afterward so I can tell him how clean his hands are. Lol!
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  5. #5

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    Found this online -

    Holding urine longer than necessary can lead to several urinary related problems, including urinary or bladder infection and kidney disease. When urine is allowed to sit in the bladder for long periods it can develop high levels of bacteria that may lead to these infections. A urinary tract infectionsóor UTIócan lead to the more serious bladder and kidney infections.

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    My DD is potty trained and does go a long time without peeing. She sometimes will only go three times in a 24 hour period. I've instituted some rules that have helped with this (she needs to finish her water with each meal before she can get down and she can't have any breakfast until she goes potty in the morning). Beyond that, there is absolutely nothing that I can do to make her go. If I force her to sit on the potty she will not go on principal.

    She used to be a water fiend and now isn't so much. But even in diapers she would go hours with a dry diaper and then it would be soaked. I can actually go a long time without peeing, too.
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    Cody is potty trained and has been for about 9 months. He was almost 4 when he finally was trained. He goes pee several times a day but, he doesn't wake up to go hardly ever. What helped Cody get motivated was reading "Duck Goes Potty". Its a funny book. Also, don't switch back and fourth with diapers and big girl pants because that will confuse her. Tell her she just has to wear big girl pants once you get started. We did with Cody he did pout sometimes but, he got over it.



  8. #8

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    Will respond more later, but to clarify, she does this in diapers. Like today, all diapers, all day, and she poured around 9:30, and hasn't peed since, and it's almost 3...



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    Quote Originally Posted by Krystal5 View Post
    Will respond more later, but to clarify, she does this in diapers. Like today, all diapers, all day, and she poured around 9:30, and hasn't peed since, and it's almost 3...
    I would say that if she does the same diapers or not, I would not let it hold me from potty training (if you are both ready).

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    Quote Originally Posted by impatient View Post
    I do think it's a long time to hold it but my DS does the same. He will pee before bed at 9 PM and the next morning I have to urge him to go pee at 10 AM or later. It drives me bonkers, I worry he would get an infection - never has. But it can be different boys vs. girls. I don't really think you can "make" your child potty train. You can certainly encourage and I think that most kids are open to the encouragement but if they don't want to, they don't want to.

    How long does she go in between peeing when she is in diapers?
    I know I can't really make her, that's why I put it in quotes. I guess I'm just wonering how strongly I should "encourage" it...

    A typical day, in diapers is like yesterday when I posted: She peed about 9:30, then again around 4:30, nothing in between. So about 7 hours.



    Quote Originally Posted by ibisgirldc View Post
    Although my son is mostly day trained, we will put him on the potty to go even if he says he doesn't have to. Not to force him to pee, but b/c often, he'll say no and then 20 minutes later, when there's no bathroom in sight, he'll tell us that he needs to go. He doesn't always have the cues to go when he should. So if we take him to the potty, he'll end up going. Problem solved.
    Maiya is the opposite. She will tell me she needs to go, and I think there's enough urine in her bladder that it would be possible, but when I put her on the toilet, she doesn't. Or if she doesn't ask to sit on the toilet, then she just doesn't go for hours... If I ask her or put her on the toilet, she doesn't go, either. I'm not sure she can make herself go yet.



    Quote Originally Posted by angmichelle View Post
    I agree that it's a very long time, for anyone actually. DS is good about going to the RR on his own and was potty trained a few months after turning 2. None the less, he sometimes tells me he doesn't have to go potty in the morning when he first wakes up which I know he does. I make him go. The deal is, he can't have his morning juice until after he's gone potty which has worked well in our house. I've also realized that when he's playing, he doesn't want to go and will hold it as long as he can. When he does this, I ask him to go. He usually agrees but once in awhile his toddler self will come out and say NO! In that case, I make him go.

    DS is big with positive reinforcement though so afterward, I praise him. Before it used to be just about peeing in the big boy potty, but now the kid can do it all by himself. He even wants me to smell his hands afterward so I can tell him how clean his hands are. Lol!
    Quote Originally Posted by JJorn View Post
    My DD is potty trained and does go a long time without peeing. She sometimes will only go three times in a 24 hour period. I've instituted some rules that have helped with this (she needs to finish her water with each meal before she can get down and she can't have any breakfast until she goes potty in the morning). Beyond that, there is absolutely nothing that I can do to make her go. If I force her to sit on the potty she will not go on principal.

    She used to be a water fiend and now isn't so much. But even in diapers she would go hours with a dry diaper and then it would be soaked. I can actually go a long time without peeing, too.
    Ang and JJ, this is why I'm thinking I may need to PT her. So I can set up some guidelines as to when to pee. Right now, she doesn't know how to go pee on command (mine or hers), so telling her something like "pee so you can have juice" is just mean... I'd have to teach her how first.

    And yes, Jess, same with Maiya. HOURS with a dry diaper and soaked. And I'm the same way, I can go a long time without, which is why it never worried me until that bladder infection.


    Quote Originally Posted by hotpinkmomma0811 View Post
    Cody is potty trained and has been for about 9 months. He was almost 4 when he finally was trained. He goes pee several times a day but, he doesn't wake up to go hardly ever. What helped Cody get motivated was reading "Duck Goes Potty". Its a funny book. Also, don't switch back and fourth with diapers and big girl pants because that will confuse her. Tell her she just has to wear big girl pants once you get started. We did with Cody he did pout sometimes but, he got over it.
    Maybe I'll try that book. She has read many books, and two of the few TV shows I let her watch has to do with potty training. But still, her interest comes and goes.

    And yes, if I ever told her she had to wear big girl panties, then I would just PT her and not look back. But I have NEVER told her to wear them, it's all been her asking if she can, and I say yes. I guess you can say I've been letting her "potty learn" at her own pace, which I thought was best, even though sometimes she wants underwear and sometimes she wants diapers. I'm beginning to wonder if I need to switch from PL to PT, though...


    Quote Originally Posted by impatient View Post
    I would say that if she does the same diapers or not, I would not let it hold me from potty training (if you are both ready).
    See, that's the thing, I believe neither she nor I are ready for her PT. I mean, if she wanted to, I'd be all for it, but I see no reason to PT now. She seemed ready back in December and almost did it, but then got the bladder infection and hasn't seemed to want to since. My big question is, even though we're not ready to PT, should I do it, anyway, so I can try to "make" / encourage / help her to go more often...? Or just continue to let her go at her pace, and hope the bladder infection was a coincidence and doesn't happen again...?


    Thanks all for the responses!
    Last edited by Krystal5; 01-29-2013 at 07:47 PM.



  11. #11

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    Quote Originally Posted by JJorn View Post
    My DD is potty trained and does go a long time without peeing. She sometimes will only go three times in a 24 hour period. I've instituted some rules that have helped with this (she needs to finish her water with each meal before she can get down and she can't have any breakfast until she goes potty in the morning). Beyond that, there is absolutely nothing that I can do to make her go. If I force her to sit on the potty she will not go on principal.

    She used to be a water fiend and now isn't so much. But even in diapers she would go hours with a dry diaper and then it would be soaked. I can actually go a long time without peeing, too.
    This is how my daughter is and we too have some rules about when she has to try to go pee... before breakfast, before we leave for somewhere, and before bed. If I let her in the morning she will (after holding it all night) wait until around noon before she decides she has to go.

    Quote Originally Posted by Krystal5 View Post
    Will respond more later, but to clarify, she does this in diapers. Like today, all diapers, all day, and she poured around 9:30, and hasn't peed since, and it's almost 3...
    My son did this in diapers too, around 16 months... he didn't go during naps or night either. When he'd be dry for a long time I would put him on the potty and he would go then but otherwise would hold it. After a month or so of this I put him in undies and he did great and after he got used to it (about a week) he started going more often. I think he just really didn't like peeing in the diaper and once he got the hang of the potty frequency increased.



  12. #12
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    How often does she hang out around other kids her age who are using the potty? My preschooler goes at least once an hour, and when my kids were actually potty training I had to set the timer for every 15 minutes or I would miss the messes. Once we get over this current illness, you are welcome to hang out out with us and my hardwood floor all day with Maiya sans diaper if you want, and potties available for the asking. It seems like sometimes just being around other kids who are using it will be more of an incentive.

    For me, I took more of a lazy approach with my youngest and trained more slowly, but he was more interested because he saw his older siblings doing it. For the twins, I did the 3-day method and it was hard work but it was over after that. During the actual potty training, I gave them salty snacks and a lot of fluids to drink to reinforce the pee-potty-pee-potty connection, but they were younger and not as verbal.

    I would suggest trying to get her to pee more often. Maybe if you can encourage her to try using the potty, that will actually help? Suggestions, opportunities, and enthusiastic applause if she pees could help. If she is taking in a lot of fluids, and still waiting that long to pee, it could have some negative consequences.


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    Oh, thanks for the offer! She does spend a lot of time around her potty trained friends, but it's not very obvious, ya know? They're there, then they disappear for a minute, then they're back... I'd love to try with you guys!

    When she is showing interest in using the toilet, I do all of that. Remind her, take her, have her sit on it and try, praise, reward... And still, she ended up with a bladder infection...

    Reading your guys' responses, I was leaning towards PTing her... But the more I think about it, the more scared I get! What if that makes it worse??? Where's my manual...



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