fanily problems please help

[logan99]

ok here it is.. first my mom never hits me. me and my bother got into a fight at mcdonalds we threw ketchup on each other.im older im 15 he is 13. i got some ketchup on some woman clothes and my mom had to reinburst her for the damage. my mom freak out on me told me i was a immature baby and my brother to in front of people in mcdonlads. Leaving mcdonalds she told us that she should get us some pacifers and some pampers and a playpen. people were looking at me. like she was right. she took away my x box my i pod and cell i cant go out on weekends now. on the car ride home she is yelling at us telling us when she goes to wallmart she should buy us a crib and stuff.telling me we made her look like a bad mother shes being a total ***** to me.

Can i turn her into CPS for abuse saying those things to me? isnt it slander or something saying lies about someone. saying i need pampers and making me look bad in public.For the record he started it my brother not me. its not fair shes doing this. she took away my games and i cant go out now cause of that *****. i want her to chill out and respect me

[cperry78]

Then respect her!

I can understand why your mom was upset. You say that you guys are 13 and 15 and you were throwing ketchup in a public establishment? No offense meant, but my kids are 3.5 and 2 and there is NO WAY they would be allowed to act like that. Seriously, they would be punished for that behavior. Even this young. So there's that.

However, that said, your mom's method of punishment (?) was to say those things to you/about you. That's not really appropriate either. Mostly b/c it's completely ineffective. She had to reimburse the person for the ruined clothes. You and your brother should be expected to get and keep neighborhood jobs (babysitting, grass cutting, etc) until you make enough to pay your mom back for that expense. That would be a much more suitable punishment than simply saying bad things about you (and it sounds like no actual action was taken)

So it seems like everyone needs to respect everyone a little bit more. Maybe try to concentrate on ACTIONS (appropriate ones) rather than words. Make sense?

And, finally, why are you on a pregnancy chat site? that makes me nervous...

[logan99]

what about the pampers comments she made though?

[christianaaa]

I don't think CPS will do anything.

[pumpkinseed2011]

No. CPS is not going to do anything. She is your mother, even what she said about needing pampers was not slander. While ineffective on her part, she was probably sick of you and your brother's actions and attitudes and pushed beyond her sense of reason. I agree, you need to be made responsible (both of you) for paying your mom back. Chores around the house that are hard, to help you learn some respect. You are lucky the restaurant manager did not kick you guys out, and that the person you hit with ketchup did not file a formal complaint.

Let it go,

[bowlerchick]

If you are in physical danger or if you are being mentally abused, CPS will step in. Your mom taking away your toys because you misbehave in public is not abuse. Her trying to make you feel guilty for what you did is harsh. She did end up having to pay another person for your mistakes though so I can also see her frustration. I would sincerely apologize to her, offer to earn money to pay her back and then make sure you don't give her more reasons to take your toys away. Good luck in the future, I hope things get better between you two.

[hotpinkmomma0811]

then respect her!

i can understand why your mom was upset. You say that you guys are 13 and 15 and you were throwing ketchup in a public establishment? No offense meant, but my kids are 3.5 and 2 and there is no way they would be allowed to act like that. Seriously, they would be punished for that behavior. Even this young. So there's that.

However, that said, your mom's method of punishment (?) was to say those things to you/about you. That's not really appropriate either. Mostly b/c it's completely ineffective. She had to reimburse the person for the ruined clothes. You and your brother should be expected to get and keep neighborhood jobs (babysitting, grass cutting, etc) until you make enough to pay your mom back for that expense. That would be a much more suitable punishment than simply saying bad things about you (and it sounds like no actual action was taken)

so it seems like everyone needs to respect everyone a little bit more. Maybe try to concentrate on actions (appropriate ones) rather than words. Make sense?

And, finally, why are you on a pregnancy chat site? That makes me nervous...

ita!!

[DucksLikeRain]

Your poor mom. Did she handle it how I would? No. But I'm going to go out on a limb and say this one isolated incident was more of an "icing on the cake" situation than "the first time my brother and I who both should know better have ever ever ever been so immature at home, let alone in public" sort of situation.

First world problems, kid. No ipod? boo hoo. No xbox? wah. Can't go out with friends? That's a shame.

Seriously. You're teenagers. Sounds like whatever went on was behaviour I didn't even tolerate from my kids when they were 2 and 3. And now you want to report her to CPS for taking away some privileges and saying a few rude things? Think again. Think about how rude you two were to HER by acting that way in public. You DID make her appear to be an inadequate mom, one who has never disciplined her teenagers. And maybe that's the case if you're getting this upset over losing your xbox. Maybe this is the first time she's stepped up to the plate after such an incident. If that's the case, good for her for taking some action. Hope she keeps it up.

As for the pampers/crib/etc comments? My kids are 6 and 7. I've said to them time and time again "if you're going to act like you're 2, I'll treat you like you're 2." And yes, I've made mention of setting the pack n play back up, pureeing all their food again, etc. Because that's how life was when they were babies. Your mom might have had a bit more creative wording of the same thing, but she most definitely was not slandering you-nor have I ever heard of CPS giving a rats about a parent slandering their child.

Sounds like you and your brother need a healthy dose of grow the heck up!

And I, too, have to question why you're posting this on a pregnancy board, and in a forum titled "Am I Pregnant?" at that...

[liontamer]

Seems like you we're abusing your mom so she got defensive and fought back with words. I don't blame her one bit for what she said. She should have calmed down first but you guys were acting worse than my 2 year old does. I tell my 2 year old to stop it and she does. You knew what you were dong was wrong so why did you keep at it? You deserve to be grounded because if I would have pulled that stunt with my mom I would have been grounded and had to work off the money she had to pay to that innocent woman.

[College_Girl_14305]

Your poor mom. Did she handle it how I would? No. But I'm going to go out on a limb and say this one isolated incident was more of an "icing on the cake" situation than "the first time my brother and I who both should know better have ever ever ever been so immature at home, let alone in public" sort of situation.

First world problems, kid. No ipod? boo hoo. No xbox? wah. Can't go out with friends? That's a shame.

Seriously. You're teenagers. Sounds like whatever went on was behaviour I didn't even tolerate from my kids when they were 2 and 3. And now you want to report her to CPS for taking away some privileges and saying a few rude things? Think again. Think about how rude you two were to HER by acting that way in public. You DID make her appear to be an inadequate mom, one who has never disciplined her teenagers. And maybe that's the case if you're getting this upset over losing your xbox. Maybe this is the first time she's stepped up to the plate after such an incident. If that's the case, good for her for taking some action. Hope she keeps it up.

As for the pampers/crib/etc comments? My kids are 6 and 7. I've said to them time and time again "if you're going to act like you're 2, I'll treat you like you're 2." And yes, I've made mention of setting the pack n play back up, pureeing all their food again, etc. Because that's how life was when they were babies. Your mom might have had a bit more creative wording of the same thing, but she most definitely was not slandering you-nor have I ever heard of CPS giving a rats about a parent slandering their child.

Sounds like you and your brother need a healthy dose of grow the heck up!

And I, too, have to question why you're posting this on a pregnancy board, and in a forum titled "Am I Pregnant?" at that...

I completely agree with this!!!

[logan99]

your right my mom never hits me. ok but i dont understand this. MY MOM JUST DIDNT CALL ME A BABY BUT TOLD ME I BELONG IN PAMPERS AGAIN look people heard her call me a baby in mcdonalds and tell me that she was going to get me diapers and a crib for what i did. i have witnessess dont you think that would help with soical servcies. its not fair it was only ketchup the people in front of us were old like in 60s they wouldnt even know it was on there clothes if my mom didnt say anything.no one got hurt. its not like anyone fell down or something like that. i dont want to sound like a whinny baby cause im not . she had to pay 45 bucks for the clothes i ruined but that was her choice. what gets me NO OTHER MOM WOULD TELL ME THAT I SHOULD BE IN DIAPERS AND NEED A BOTTLE ONLY MINE DOES THAT. thats how un cool she is.. it was mcdonlads no place fancy. her telling everyone im a baby and stuff was foul and abunch of lies. like i said she took away my x box and games and I pod. she wont let me take drivers ed in school saying im to immature to drive.
on the car ride home she is screaming and me and my brother. telling us we made her look bad as a parent that we behaved like a bunch of toddlers. when i try to tell her that is was my brother fault not mine. she told me i was to blame as well. she freaked out on me..

[logan99]

look my mom can be cool sometimes .she not all bad..but this time she went off on me i thought it wasnt cool of her

[College_Girl_14305]

your right my mom never hits me. ok but i dont understand this. MY MOM JUST DIDNT CALL ME A BABY BUT TOLD ME I BELONG IN PAMPERS AGAIN look people heard her call me a baby in mcdonalds and tell me that she was going to get me diapers and a crib for what i did. i have witnessess dont you think that would help with soical servcies. its not fair it was only ketchup the people in front of us were old like in 60s they wouldnt even know it was on there clothes if my mom didnt say anything.no one got hurt. its not like anyone fell down or something like that. i dont want to sound like a whinny baby cause im not . she had to pay 45 bucks for the clothes i ruined but that was her choice. what gets me NO OTHER MOM WOULD TELL ME THAT I SHOULD BE IN DIAPERS AND NEED A BOTTLE ONLY MINE DOES THAT. thats how un cool she is.. it was mcdonlads no place fancy. her telling everyone im a baby and stuff was foul and abunch of lies. like i said she took away my x box and games and I pod. she wont let me take drivers ed in school saying im to immature to drive.
on the car ride home she is screaming and me and my brother. telling us we made her look bad as a parent that we behaved like a bunch of toddlers. when i try to tell her that is was my brother fault not mine. she told me i was to blame as well. she freaked out on me..

Personally, I think ur mother was too lenient... There would be a much harsher punishment if you were my children. My 3 and 5 yr olds would never act like that... U should be treated like babies if u r going to act that terrible.

[christianaaa]

Regardless of where you were at, you embarrassed her. If my children acted like that in public I'd probably tell them the same thing (or something to that effect). I didn't grow up thinking it was okay to act like that, and my kids will not either.

[logan99]

Personally, I think ur mother was too lenient... There would be a much harsher punishment if you were my children. My 3 and 5 yr olds would never act like that... U should be treated like babies if u r going to act that terrible.

MY MOM was to lienant? how would u like it. she stood there and ask me if i need my diaper change and do i need a bottle. this was in public in front of people. she yelled it..and people laughed at me cause of her actions

[DucksLikeRain]

Your mom might have been a bit over the line in terms of handling the situation maturely. But like I said before-from the gimme-gimme entitled attitude you seem to have, I doubt this was the first instance where you have been in the wrong. Highly in the wrong. It sounds like you're spoiled. And it sounds like perhaps your mom is realizing that and trying to figure out where to start in fixing problems.

You throwing ketchup-that's a problem. You whining about your xbox being taken away-that's a problem. You whining about your ipod-that's a problem. You thinking you're entitled to have your mom pay for driver's ed-that's a problem. You thinking it is unfair that you can't go out-that's a problem. Kudos to your mom for trying to figure out how to fix these problems. You might not believe it, but you'll likely thank her in the future.

Her asking if you need your diaper changed? Childish, but not a problem. Not even close. Embarrassing to you? Absolutely-which was probably her point. But why should she care what's embarrassing to you when you obviously didn't care about that fact at McDonalds? That was great of her to point out that her TEENAGER had thrown a CHILDISH fit and had ruined someone's clothes. I can't believe you've implied that the fact that the people were "old, like in their 60's" means they don't deserve to be compensated for YOUR negligence and childish actions! Oh wait, you don't have your ipod to go listen to. I guess I can believe that you would actually feel that way/believe that.

And really, CPS would laugh at all this. And then, if you pushed it and lied and said your mom does get physical with you, and an investigation started, you may just find you actually had it REALLY GOOD at home as being "in the system" definitely would not afford you the chance at having unfettered access to an xbox or ipod or driver's ed or going out socially...

[logan99]

Your mom might have been a bit over the line in terms of handling the situation maturely. But like I said before-from the gimme-gimme entitled attitude you seem to have, I doubt this was the first instance where you have been in the wrong. Highly in the wrong. It sounds like you're spoiled. And it sounds like perhaps your mom is realizing that and trying to figure out where to start in fixing problems.

You throwing ketchup-that's a problem. You whining about your xbox being taken away-that's a problem. You whining about your ipod-that's a problem. You thinking you're entitled to have your mom pay for driver's ed-that's a problem. You thinking it is unfair that you can't go out-that's a problem. Kudos to your mom for trying to figure out how to fix these problems. You might not believe it, but you'll likely thank her in the future.

Her asking if you need your diaper changed? Childish, but not a problem. Not even close. Embarrassing to you? Absolutely-which was probably her point. But why should she care what's embarrassing to you when you obviously didn't care about that fact at McDonalds? That was great of her to point out that her TEENAGER had thrown a CHILDISH fit and had ruined someone's clothes. I can't believe you've implied that the fact that the people were "old, like in their 60's" means they don't deserve to be compensated for YOUR negligence and childish actions! Oh wait, you don't have your ipod to go listen to. I guess I can believe that you would actually feel that way/believe that.

And really, CPS would laugh at all this. And then, if you pushed it and lied and said your mom does get physical with you, and an investigation started, you may just find you actually had it REALLY GOOD at home as being "in the system" definitely would not afford you the chance at having unfettered access to an xbox or ipod or driver's ed or going out socially...

i didnt mean to come across like there old people in a nasty way. if she didnt say anything to them. then the people in the 60s woudnt have said anything to her and this thing wouldnt have gone on and on. that thing is what started the yelling in there.

[logan99]

drivers ed now is 150 dollars now ok. if she waits until the summer its going to cost her 250. so how i look at it im saving her money.she took away my cell my i pod and other stuff. i want to get my learners permit it means a lot to me

[Consensus]

Your mom might have been a bit over the line in terms of handling the situation maturely. But like I said before-from the gimme-gimme entitled attitude you seem to have, I doubt this was the first instance where you have been in the wrong. Highly in the wrong. It sounds like you're spoiled. And it sounds like perhaps your mom is realizing that and trying to figure out where to start in fixing problems.

You throwing ketchup-that's a problem. You whining about your xbox being taken away-that's a problem. You whining about your ipod-that's a problem. You thinking you're entitled to have your mom pay for driver's ed-that's a problem. You thinking it is unfair that you can't go out-that's a problem. Kudos to your mom for trying to figure out how to fix these problems. You might not believe it, but you'll likely thank her in the future.

Her asking if you need your diaper changed? Childish, but not a problem. Not even close. Embarrassing to you? Absolutely-which was probably her point. But why should she care what's embarrassing to you when you obviously didn't care about that fact at McDonalds? That was great of her to point out that her TEENAGER had thrown a CHILDISH fit and had ruined someone's clothes. I can't believe you've implied that the fact that the people were "old, like in their 60's" means they don't deserve to be compensated for YOUR negligence and childish actions! Oh wait, you don't have your ipod to go listen to. I guess I can believe that you would actually feel that way/believe that.

And really, CPS would laugh at all this. And then, if you pushed it and lied and said your mom does get physical with you, and an investigation started, you may just find you actually had it REALLY GOOD at home as being "in the system" definitely would not afford you the chance at having unfettered access to an xbox or ipod or driver's ed or going out socially...

Lol, I was going to suggest she go ahead and contact CPS. But that's the immature side of me ;)

Logan99, your mom is doing you a favor - perhaps a bit late - but better late than never. Learning that there are real consequences to your actions is a very fair life lesson. You will hopefully look back on this and feel a bit embarrassed and humbled. I hope you and your mom are able to have a calm discussion about behaviorial expectations, like setting an example for your younger brother and not engaging in a fight he starts, and taking discipline with a bit of dignity.

[logan99]

Lol, I was going to suggest she go ahead and contact CPS. But that's the immature side of me ;)

Logan99, your mom is doing you a favor - perhaps a bit late - but better late than never. Learning that there are real consequences to your actions is a very fair life lesson. You will hopefully look back on this and feel a bit embarrassed and humbled. I hope you and your mom are able to have a calm discussion about behaviorial expectations, like setting an example for your younger brother and not engaging in a fight he starts, and taking discipline with a bit of dignity.

right now were not talking

[cassi]

Based on the above I'd say you're definitely NOT pregnant!

[christianaaa]

Based on the above I'd say you're definitely NOT pregnant!

I hope not.

[Consensus]

right now were not talking

That's understandable - you are both pretty mad. I recently heard you should HALT before a difficult discussion to see if it's the best time to talk. Don't talk if you're Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired. Emotions are complicated, and it's going to be easy in a conversation with your mom to get sidetracked off the main focus of the conversation. If you can, take a walk outside to cool down. Come home, grab a snack or eat dinner. When you can think about the issues that you are most concerned with (your brother starting things, her embarrassing you in public) without feeling like you're going to explode, then it's time to talk to your mom about the fairness of the issue. Chances are, if you are given enough time to cool down, so will she, and you can probably sit down with some mutual respect.
This might be the easiest way to deal with the situation. The hard way will be her making and enforcing rules with an iron fist, which she can do because she is the parent and you are a minor in her house, and you constantly fighting her every step of the way. Remember, even when she gets frustrated or mad your mom loves you and wants what is best for you, and started taking away privileges today because she, in her judgment, thought that was best. Your mom was your age once too - and to her it may not feel like that long ago. When you begin to show additional maturity, there will be different ways available for you and her to resolve conflicts.

[liontamer]

I can't believe you really would call cps over this. Your mom is being a **** good mom to you obviously because of all the material things you have. You shouldn't have thrown the ketchup, it doesn't matter who started it. You are 15 years old, you know better! Your mom calling you a baby was stating the truth and is not slander. You were acting like a child who should be wearing diapers and be in a crib. Realize what you did wrong and apologize to your mother who obviously has given you so much and felt extremely disrespected by her teenagers acting like babies!

[logan99]

I can't believe you really would call cps over this. Your mom is being a **** good mom to you obviously because of all the material things you have. You shouldn't have thrown the ketchup, it doesn't matter who started it. You are 15 years old, you know better! Your mom calling you a baby was stating the truth and is not slander. You were acting like a child who should be wearing diapers and be in a crib. Realize what you did wrong and apologize to your mother who obviously has given you so much and felt extremely disrespected by her teenagers acting like babies!

she stood there ask me and my brother if we need out diapers change in front of people. i dont no any other people besides her that does that.

[liontamer]

Look your mom only reacted that way because you did something childish Hun. You really got to step back and look at all the amazing things she does for you.

I have heard many parents use that type of line with there child. I have told my nephew who was 5 in public if he was going to act like a baby I guess it's time to go get him a bottle. He stopped throwing a fit and straightened up. You deserved to be talked to like that because of your actions. Come on don't you think you throwing ketchup was childish?

[logan99]

Look your mom only reacted that way because you did something childish Hun. You really got to step back and look at all the amazing things she does for you.

I have heard many parents use that type of line with there child. I have told my nephew who was 5 in public if he was going to act like a baby I guess it's time to go get him a bottle. He stopped throwing a fit and straightened up. You deserved to be talked to like that because of your actions. Come on don't you think you throwing ketchup was childish?

ok but when u said that to him it wasnt in front of people right?

[liontamer]

Yes it was because he was throwing a fit and disrespecting me in front of people and he needed to know how it felt.

[Gwenn]

she stood there ask me and my brother if we need out diapers change in front of people. i dont no any other people besides her that does that.

I don't know any 15-year-olds who throw ketchup in restaurants and are unable to understand why other people around them might be upset by that fact, despite them being old and in their 60's. So if you don't see other parents talking to their teens that way, it's probably because their teens weren't acting so childishly.

And WHY are you posting in "Am I Pregnant?" exactly?

[logan99]

I don't know any 15-year-olds who throw ketchup in restaurants and are unable to understand why other people around them might be upset by that fact, despite them being old and in their 60's. So if you don't see other parents talking to their teens that way, it's probably because their teens weren't acting so childishly.

And WHY are you posting in "Am I Pregnant?" exactly?

i peed on a etp stick it came back +
im wating for an email from another member to help..my mom is going flip out on me. she going to send me to live with my dad after this