I can't believe that it has been 4 years and 8 months since we lost our baby girl. We were into our 21st week, and had gone through so much with a Spina Bifida diagnosis. The weeks of tears, fear and sadness that ensued were unbearable. But we made it through, and I think about Elaina Marlette nearly every day. I don't have the bitter sadness anymore or the acute pain - I've gotten to a place of acceptance. I always try to find the good in things, and through our loss, I learned that my SO and I can make it through anything together. I learned I can survive when I don't think living is possible. And while I wish she were here, I know she will always be part of our lives.
Today, I am prompted to post because she was conceived 5 years ago this month. And oddly enough, SO and I chose this month to begin trying again. I hope that we have a more positive outcome, but I know that no matter what, we will have love for Elaina and we will weather the storms ahead.