Would you allow your 6 year old DD to have a shaved head?
**I meant to put daughter in the title***
Hypothetical here. So far. Savana has mentioned a few times (while we are brushing her hair or doing tick checks) that she wishes she could gave short cut like Kai's in the summertime because it is so much easier for him. I have told her she can if she wants, essentially calling her bluff. One of these days she just may call mine, though.Dbf says no way. I say why not?
I dont think I would shave it but short is cute but you are the parent and do what is comfortable to you no matter what anyone else says.
Yes, I do what is comfortable to me no matter what anyone else says but I'm just curiousOriginally Posted by rtroth
I only have boys and keep their hair short because I like it that way, but I think that if I had a daughter I would let her have a pixie cut if she wanted it really short.
I am pretty open about letting kids express themselves..... but I don't know if I could go along with my litte girl shaving her head. Short yes, shaved.... I just don't know if I could TBH
I've been wondering myslef when I will be ok with cutting Chanas hair, she is almost 4 and has never had it cut I dont want it crazy long I just feel sad when thinking of cutting it, like she is getting so old already!
No, I would not allow it. Short haircut, sure, shaved head, No. Kids are mean and I wouldn't want her to get picked on.
I have three daughters and I would not let them shave their heads. They could have a pixie cut if they wanted a short do
Becky
I *want* to say "sure, why not?!?"....... but as far as hair goes I've for the most part bought into the expectation that boys and girls each have certain hairstyles. I have much of my own identity wrapped up in my hair, and I admit I sort of hold DD to what my idea of a girl's hairstyle is. Not that I've denied her a haircut or anything--- right now her hair is over halfway down her back and she's needed a trim for over a year but refuses to let me cut her hair- but I would have a hard time even letting her have a super short pixie cut. I would do it, but I admit it would be hard initially. Shaved head- I would have to say maybe when she's older---- not sure how old. But not at 6.
I agree with many here. Short, but probably not shaved. I had my DS1's head shaved a little while back and regretted it! I won't go that short again unless he specifically asks for that. I'm all for letting kids express themselves though, and would have a hard time telling my kids they can't look how they want, to a certain extent.
~Andrea~
A pixie cut would look adorable on some little girls. I think if I had a daughter who wanted short hair that's what I would do.
Megan (28) and Jayson (31) Happily married 8 years
No, but mostly because kids are impulsive and I would think she would likely regret it then have to wait many months for it to grow in (while possibly enduring ridicule from peers). I do think there is an age when kids can make there own decisions about hair and appearance to an extent, but not at 6 years old.
I would definitely offer a pixie cut or other shorter hair cut and look at pics online or in magazine to see if she wants to go for it.
lost our bean to Triploidy Sep 2010
Every day when we are brushing hair Scharae complains about it and every time I tell her if she doesn't like it we can certainly cut it short. And she has taken me up on it. Until she was almost 5 she was consistently choosing to keep her hair pretty short, 1.5-2 inches or so. If she wanted to shave it I'd certainly let her, but I can almost guarantee she wouldn't want to do that because Keira would never do it and she likes ito be similar to her sister. Keira is so vain about her hair it's ridiculous.
No, I don't think so. If my hypothetical daughter was sensitive at all, then no way. I don't think a small child can really understand how much attention something like could attract and it would take a thick skin to ignore comments, questions and stares. From a philosophical perspective, I think people should be able to do what they want with their appearance but the world can be harsh and more so to people who are different.
My chalk loving 2 1/2 y.o. boys!
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No. But I wouldn't shave my boy's hair, either. I just don't like that look.
For a girl, I would let her have short hair if that's what she wanted, but I'd still try to choose a feminine style. I have a friend whose 5-year-old daughter prefers super-short hair, but it hurts the girl's feelings when people assume she's a boy in spite of her girly clothes.
Bethany (39) & Brian (37) ~ Happily married for 6 years!
No, but I know some that have shaved heads/mohawks...well on boys anyway, I don't think I would let Xander much less the girls..
This is me completely. I don't like that style for my boys and I wouldn't for a girl either. A short pixie cut is fine as I've had my hair that short myself. Just not crazy about shaved heads.
I really don't know. I really am not sure she would fully understand how long it may take to grow back and what it would look like. I am all for them making choices, especially about their bodies, but not if they don't have the ability to understand what those choices may mean. I might cut it short and then in a week or 2 ask if she wants it shorter, and then so on so she can see the differences but not have it be so dramatic? If it's hard for her to manage I would try to either find a hat, clip, or bandana solution or a hairstyle that requires less maintenance - like having her grow it one length so it can all be pulled back.
I would look online for some cool short hair cuts....maybe she will find something she likes? I don't blame her....I have been tempted to do the same before lol!
Thing 1 (6), Thing 2 (4), Thing 3 (10M)
This exactly. The only way I would allow a boy or a girl to shave their head is if it was one of those school things and they were supporting a classmate who had cancer and lost hair. Otherwise, until very much older than 6, both a son or daughter of mine would have hair (and a boy could be shorter but not shaved).
And really I have found longer hair so much easier than shoulder length. Will she let you braid it or keep it pulled up in the summer? I hardly ever have snarls....I got a lot of them when my hair was shorter or layered.
Last edited by Cosmosmom; 06-22-2012 at 02:07 PM.
Jennifer, 34, DH 36
I first shaved my own head when I was 13. My mom was so upset, she wouldn't let me come in the house for hours ... made me sit outside on the front porch. I had had long blond hair that got a lot of comments. I think she had some vested interest in my hair, and it killed her when I shaved it off. Not to mention that she was embarrassed at how she felt my appearance reflected on her. Now that I am a parent I do see how hard it can be to separate ourselves from our children, and I have more compassion for her reaction. But the experience has still left me with conviction to try to separate my own feelings from my kids' actions and desires. It is not easy. My older dd went through an "experimental hair color" phase at 12 and I really, really had to work on being okay with the colors and styles she chose.
That said, a shaved head feels great! Especially in summer. But very short hair feels *almost* as good. I think with a young child, most of the stares and comments you would get would be because they thought she'd been ill (since it's such an uncommon style for a young girl to have). If it were me, my reluctance would be based on knowing I'd get sick of having to answer "No, she doesn't have cancer," every time we went out.
I don't know. It really doesn't take too long to grow out from a buzzcut to a short-but-girlish style if it's what she wants. I guess what I would do if my little girl kept asking is to cut it short, and then shorter, and then shorter still ... and if she had a little pixie and still wanted it shorter, we'd give her a buzz. Then take lots of pictures.
Last edited by pepperlru; 06-22-2012 at 02:10 PM.
-- mom to DD1 1/98 and DD2 10/09
Every day is a gift. It's just... does it have to be a pair of socks?
Hopelessly Devoted
I ditto Pepperlru's second paragraph, mostly because I never shaved my head. A shaved head would garner a lot of attention and questions about illness, and I think that no matter how much individual style and comfort she might desire, she also might want to be sensitive to how much other people would be concerned for her well-being or would be noticing her appearance. And then before shaved, it would make a lot of people assume she's a boy. She may not care about that, but it does get tiring answering the same questions over and over and over again.
I agree to go fairly short, then shorter, then shorter, and do it in steps and see if at any point she feels comfortable enough and likes the look.
Our baby is 3 years old already!
After thinking about it and viewing the responses, I would actually let her do it if she really wanted to, but I am one to draw out a decision such as this as I would want to remind her of how she would get weird stares and how people will think she is ill with cancer or something, and that it would take a long time to grow back.
But really, it is just hair. It won't stay bald for long. Not sure I would go all the way, shiny scalped bald though. I would give her a buzz cut. A lot of black girls have really short hair, my 4 year old niece barely has any hair at all and she is a cutie-patootie so maybe I am thinking of that perspective. She has probably 2/3rds of an inch of hair styled in an afro.
Even though this isn't as dramatic, Elle and I have been having the ear piercing discussion off and on for about 6 months now. She wants her ears pierced. I told her that it will pinch a little and she will have to go to the doctor to get it done (keloid skin runs in my family and so I would never just get a child's ears pierced as a baby). She keeps changing her mind, because of the hurting part. She said she is not brave enough yet to endure her ears hurting. So it is a back and forth thing every time she mentions wanting to get them pierced. I figure she will not do it until she's 12 like I did. I would have similar discussions about any sort of hairstyle as well, except those that take a lot of maintenance from me. Ky wants to get dreadlocks but I refused because they are too much maintenance so I did say no to that one and told him when he goes to college he can get dreadlocks.
Erin
Last edited by Ky'sMom; 06-22-2012 at 02:22 PM.
What about braids - like Jamaican-style? When I went to Jamaica I got my hair braided and it stayed that way for a months. It was easy and cool and looked great. I am not sure what the tick-factor would be....I would assume you would just have to worry about the parts of scalp exposed....the braids are tight. I can't imagine a tick borrowing down into one. It may lead to even easier tick checks. Who knows, if you did it before you know it Kai might be asking for braids
Thing 1 (6), Thing 2 (4), Thing 3 (10M)
I wouldn't let her shave her head, and I'd be a little hesitant to let her have too short of hair. I worked at a preschool and one little girl got a pixie cut, and the other kids made fun of her and called her a boy and sometimes parents mistook her for a little boy and it would really upset her. (Conversely, one year we had a boy with really long hair and he got mistaken for a girl all the time and it upset him. So much of little kids' gender identification comes from hair length.)
I think I would allow my daughter to have a pixie cut, as long as I explained to her that she might be mistaken for a boy. If I was sure she understood and that she was okay with that, then I'd go ahead and let her cut her hair short.
Last edited by hpfan04; 06-22-2012 at 02:33 PM.
Kyli (26) DH (29) Liam (5/13/09) Evette (10/18/12)
Probably. I shaved my head all the time when I was a teenager.
I didn't read responses but I'd be more than willing to let her do a cute pixie cut. Not shaved shaved, but you know. Short and cute.
**Lizzo**
no way. i think she is too young to choose a shaved head.
i agree with this....I think with a young child, most of the stares and comments you would get would be because they thought she'd been ill (since it's such an uncommon style for a young girl to have). If it were me, my reluctance would be based on knowing I'd get sick of having to answer "No, she doesn't have cancer," every time we went out.
I don't know. It really doesn't take too long to grow out from a buzzcut to a short-but-girlish style if it's what she wants. I guess what I would do if my little girl kept asking is to cut it short, and then shorter, and then shorter still ... and if she had a little pixie and still wanted it shorter, we'd give her a buzz. Then take lots of pictures.
i have considered shaving Q's head, he always puts his food in it and its a pain to get out. but i can't bring myself to shave it all off.
Ditto!
This situation occured with my daughter, Bridget! She had long straight hair and it tangled so easily, she hated me brushing it, and often I wouldn't brush it because it wasn't worth the struggle so I asked her if she wanted a short cut and she said she did. So she got it cut shoulder length (no where near shaved) but dramatic none the less. It's been a dream!! About a week after she got it chopped off, she was saying that she missed her long hair, but I assured her that hair grows fast and it will be long again soon.
But no, not shaved!!
As much as I love her long, beautiful hair (minus the tangles and brushing drama), I would cut it short if she asked me to and was serious about it. It grows quickly. I would not shave it though mostly because I dont want people constantly thinking or asking if she's a cancer patient and she's very sensitive and would get upset if people mistook her for a boy on a regular basis.
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