Beta!!!

[sammilynn]

NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO! ITS NOT FAIR! AHHHH! WTF! WTH is nature playing at? Ijfoijgwegjoisdgsgaknv I hate the human body. I am so so so so sorry Erica.

[swatty]

Dangit!! I'm soooooooo sorry Erica

[pumpkinpeejays]

This sucks the big one.

[auntmommy]

Erica, I am so sorry. I hate this so completely I can't think of words to express it. You will be in my thoughts. The other Erica

[akhiker]

Thanks everyone. I'm pretty numb today, trying to not think about it, distracting myself with school work and all of the flowers I have to plant tomorrow. I'm thinking that the 170 mile solo hike I now have planned for Yosemite in July will also help me work through all of this (and will give me the chance to tell the universe how I feel about all of this). We're not totally out of it, just going to regroup and decide which direction we want to go-probably donor embryo and/or traditional adoption. I think I've finally come to the realization that we tried our best, and that we might have to pursue more nontraditional options to start a family. One thing DH and I agreed upon last night (once we were into our second bottle of wine!) is that we definitely still want to have a family. Thank you all so much for your love and support, I never could have survived any of this had it not been for you. I truly hope that you all have a wonderful and healthy 9 months...I might not be too visible again this summer, but I'll be stalking!

[swatty]

[sammilynn]

I am sending you positive vibes that you get your sticky bean

[akhiker]

Thanks Sammi. The m/c started while at work today...I feel worse now than I did after my D&C. Had a very therapeutic day in the garden yesterday, today I'm just going to relax on the couch. Hopefully there is a sticky bean somewhere out there for us.

[sammilynn]

There is and s/he will come to you one way or another. I will be stalking you.

[djackson123]

My heart is aching for you right now. Saying it's not fair just doesn't seem to cut it but it's how I'm feeling for you right now. I'm so sorry for your loss.

[tikyg]

I am heartbroken for you....I do not think I have words that could make you feel better but do know I have you in my prayers! hugs

[The J Team]

I'm so sorry for your loss. I hope you can find peace and healing. I have been a silent stalker (sorry)... You are such a strong person with a great attitude. I hope you get a sticky bean very soon.

[akhiker]

Thanks everyone, I'm finally starting to feel better, physically at least. Being busy at work, going on vacation next week, and planning a big hike for July are all keeping me plenty distracted. I think we'll be ready to jump in to adoption and donor embryo later this summer, just need to grieve this first. DH is definitely grieving in his own way...he wants lots of nice things/toys like his other childless friends have...looks like we'll be buying a new car and couch soon if he has anything to say about it! I will definitely be stalking everyone, can't wait to see all of your families grow!

[mamamanda]

I am so sorry you have to go through this.