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Thread: This is getting so annoying...is this normal?

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    Default This is getting so annoying...is this normal?

    So DD talks about boobs all the time and it's driving me insane. Ever since I told her about breastfeeding, it's all she talks about. She wants to touch mine, is obsessive when I change in front of her (so I don't anymore), and talks about them alot. She refers to them as ching chings, boobies, and really it's gotten to the point to where it annoys the heck outta me. I've answered all her questions about them. She always tells me stuff like "Adri's gonna do this ya?" and puts her mouth on my boob and it's sooo irritating because I know she just wants to touch it. She always tells me she wishes she had big boobs like me. What the heck can I do to make her stop? She's 4.5 years old

    (Me) Autumn, (DH) Darren, (DD1) Naheana, (DS) Mahikoa, (DD2) Ku'ula'iokeakua, (?) Ku'umana'ookeakua, and our (FB) Hansi Boy..meowww and Oz..woof woof

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    I think it is probably totally normal. I would guess the only way to make her stop is to keep talking, keep making it no big deal and eventually she will get bored with it and move on. When Jericho came along the triplets got very interested in breasts and breast feeding, they would even pretend to BF their dolls.

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    She bfs her dollies too, which I love. But when she gets obsessive with mine, lol, idk it's just annoying already. I find it not normal behavior. My areolas have gotten darker since being pregnant so she calls them chocolate cookies, and asks if Adriana will be drinking chocolate milk. At first I found this to be hilarious, so now she says it to be funny and it irritates the heck outta me. I'm wondering if I made her too comfortable with talking about it because now she won't stop. and I don't want to scold her because I want her to feel she can talk to me about anything. How do I portray the message that enough is enough without being too harsh on her?

    What I've been saying is I ask her if she's supposed to talk about other peoples private parts. She says no. So I ask her if she would like for me to talk to people about her private parts. She says no, but often gets upset at me like I'm scolding her. Which Im not. But I try to bring my tone to a more mellow, serious one vs playing around and joking.

    (Me) Autumn, (DH) Darren, (DD1) Naheana, (DS) Mahikoa, (DD2) Ku'ula'iokeakua, (?) Ku'umana'ookeakua, and our (FB) Hansi Boy..meowww and Oz..woof woof

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    I'm sure it's normal but I can definitely understand how it would be annoying. I know I could get flamed for saying this but I would have one quiet talk with her about how talking about people's bodies and having questions is OK, but you don't want her to touch your breasts (boobies) anymore. I would stress to her that her body is her own and that she can tell people she doesn't want to be touched as well. After that I would treat it like any other annoying behavior and ask her to stop, then if she doesn't do the same discipline you do for any other annoying or 'naughty' behaviors. IMO it's just a lesson in respecting other people's boundaries (including mommy) and if you do it with love she won't feel like she can't talk to you about it.

    As far as repeating the same questions over and over, I would just say my answer once then tell her that we already discussed it and try to distract her. If she refuses to move on, it becomes a discipline point as well. To me repeating the same questions over and over is like "are we there yet"? and not necessarily about any genuine curiosity.



    lost our bean to Triploidy Sep 2010

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    Quote Originally Posted by TripMomma View Post
    I think it is probably totally normal. I would guess the only way to make her stop is to keep talking, keep making it no big deal and eventually she will get bored with it and move on. When Jericho came along the triplets got very interested in breasts and breast feeding, they would even pretend to BF their dolls.
    I agree.

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    I can see how that would be annoying and I TOTALLY understand how being pregnant plays into that. I get abnormally annoyed about things this pregnancy that otherwise would just be minor irritations. So I bet the pregnancy is playing into how irritated you are getting about it.

    You could try your best to ignore it or maybe tell her that breasts, while important for feeding the baby, are private and you don't want her to touch them. And talk about how no one should touch her chest or private parts but it's ok to talk about them if you have a problem or concern, etc. You want to be careful not to privatize them too much and create and issue where she wont talk about them or show you things that may be wrong but I don't see anything wrong with saying you don't want yours touched. It's about respecting your body and you can teach her in the meantime that others shouldn't be touching hers as well.

    My girls were OBSESSED with vaginas and would talk about them constantly (no touching luckily). We did tell them that discussing vaginas was only for at home but otherwise just ignored it and it basically stopped....it was really annoying so I am glad that is over lol!

    Thing 1 (6), Thing 2 (4), Thing 3 (10M)

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    Quote Originally Posted by macksmom View Post
    I can see how that would be annoying and I TOTALLY understand how being pregnant plays into that. I get abnormally annoyed about things this pregnancy that otherwise would just be minor irritations. So I bet the pregnancy is playing into how irritated you are getting about it.

    You could try your best to ignore it or maybe tell her that breasts, while important for feeding the baby, are private and you don't want her to touch them. And talk about how no one should touch her chest or private parts but it's ok to talk about them if you have a problem or concern, etc. You want to be careful not to privatize them too much and create and issue where she wont talk about them or show you things that may be wrong but I don't see anything wrong with saying you don't want yours touched. It's about respecting your body and you can teach her in the meantime that others shouldn't be touching hers as well.

    My girls were OBSESSED with vaginas and would talk about them constantly (no touching luckily). We did tell them that discussing vaginas was only for at home but otherwise just ignored it and it basically stopped....it was really annoying so I am glad that is over lol!
    Well said!
    Kirsten (34), DH (36) & DS (born 12/8/09) + 1 Angel (1/17/2012)


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    Quote Originally Posted by macksmom View Post
    I can see how that would be annoying and I TOTALLY understand how being pregnant plays into that. I get abnormally annoyed about things this pregnancy that otherwise would just be minor irritations. So I bet the pregnancy is playing into how irritated you are getting about it.

    You could try your best to ignore it or maybe tell her that breasts, while important for feeding the baby, are private and you don't want her to touch them. And talk about how no one should touch her chest or private parts but it's ok to talk about them if you have a problem or concern, etc. You want to be careful not to privatize them too much and create and issue where she wont talk about them or show you things that may be wrong but I don't see anything wrong with saying you don't want yours touched. It's about respecting your body and you can teach her in the meantime that others shouldn't be touching hers as well.

    My girls were OBSESSED with vaginas and would talk about them constantly (no touching luckily). We did tell them that discussing vaginas was only for at home but otherwise just ignored it and it basically stopped....it was really annoying so I am glad that is over lol!
    Thank you. I do feel extra annoyed at certain things, and sadly it's a lot of things DD does/says. But the boobs thing is over the top. She's kinda calmed down about it these past few days which is awesome, but we will see when the BFing starts.

    Thank you to all who answered.

    (Me) Autumn, (DH) Darren, (DD1) Naheana, (DS) Mahikoa, (DD2) Ku'ula'iokeakua, (?) Ku'umana'ookeakua, and our (FB) Hansi Boy..meowww and Oz..woof woof

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    Quote Originally Posted by AbbeysMom View Post
    I'm sure it's normal but I can definitely understand how it would be annoying. I know I could get flamed for saying this but I would have one quiet talk with her about how talking about people's bodies and having questions is OK, but you don't want her to touch your breasts (boobies) anymore. I would stress to her that her body is her own and that she can tell people she doesn't want to be touched as well. After that I would treat it like any other annoying behavior and ask her to stop, then if she doesn't do the same discipline you do for any other annoying or 'naughty' behaviors. IMO it's just a lesson in respecting other people's boundaries (including mommy) and if you do it with love she won't feel like she can't talk to you about it.

    As far as repeating the same questions over and over, I would just say my answer once then tell her that we already discussed it and try to distract her. If she refuses to move on, it becomes a discipline point as well. To me repeating the same questions over and over is like "are we there yet"? and not necessarily about any genuine curiosity.
    I agree boundaries need to be set. Will she be in preschool will the baby comes so you might have more privacy?
    -LINDSAY-



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    This is kinda us, but not quite that extreme. I want dd to feel comfy with her body and not feel insecure and I don't want boobs to be made sexual. I grew up thinking boobs were sexual and that really bothered me...it bothered me enough where it was even hard to bf, but thanks to apa I got over those issues. So, I have been very laid back about dd seeing my breasts and not making a big deal about it. I always tell her how they are used for feeding babies (even tho I bf very briefly). My dd is about the same age as yours, so I understand where you are coming from. It's hard to know if what we do and say are the right or wrong things. I think we just need to trust our gut since we know our LOs the best. I am glad you posted this.
    Heather-35 , Dh-33, Ds-9, Dd-4 our IVF baby & Dd-1 our surprise baby

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