Would it be out of line...?

[Rae_1478]

So there is a young couple at my church with 3 children about 5, almost 4 and not quite 3. They are the BEST behaved children I have EVER seen in church. When their parents are greeters, they stand in a line and shake hands, too. During service, they sit in their pew quietly looking at some bible story based books and the older one even follows along with the service (she's just learning how to read).

My question is, my husband and I do not know this couple well (only by sight, not by name). Would it be inapproprate for me/us to ask them what they did so right to raise these incredibly well behaved children? If my child is half as good during church I think I would be happy!

[mla]

I don't see how that would be out of line. I'd ask.

[JJorn]

I would think it would be fine to tell them that their kids seem so well behaved at church. Tell them that you are expecting a child and would love to know if they have any resources or advice for you so that might help you with your child. I think that they would be more than happy to share with you.

For us, we always work to correct the heart and not just the outward behavior. It is hard! Some resources that we have used are Entrusted with a Child's Heart and Shepherding a Child's heart.

[KC's wifey]

If someone said that to me, I would take it as a huge compliment. I don't think it is out of line at all.

[Sakura]

I agree with the others. It wouldn't be out of line at all. And you may end up forging a good friendship with them, too.

[MaryJane]

I just have to say that I have had people compliment me on how well-behaved my kids are and how do I do it, but I've also had people sigh in dismay at what total terrors they are depending on the day, the situation, and the mood they're in at the time. I know people whose kids are very well-behaved but I think they are harsh and hateful to their kids and have seen them punish them for things I thought were just normal kid stuff. Just because kids are well-behaved doesn't mean their parents have some perfect parenting style. They might beat them into submission behind closed doors. That's what my mom's parents did to them. Whereas my dad's parents were loving and patient and attentive and they were also well-behaved. Not saying you shouldn't compliment them on their kids being well behaved, just that you shouldn't expect much enlightenment on how they got that way.