The bible tells us that as wives we are to respect our husbands. What do you do if you just don't view your husband as really worthy of respect? I wish I respected my husband but I just don't. We have been married for 11 years. He is a good man. He is a good father. However he has got to be the worst provider in the history of the world. I am not going to go deep into it but suffice it to say that we live well below the poverty line because he just has to be self-employed. He is not the kind of person that is cut out for that. Ever since we got married he has had very inconsistent employment. If he gets a job making a good wage he gets fired. He just withdrew from school because he can't handle his piddly self employment and school too. I don't get that as I handle all household duties, parenting and grad school. So here he is almost 40, and has no real clue what he wants to be. I am sick and fed up with it and consequently I have no respect for him.
I would love nothing more than to be able to rely on him to bring home the bacon, and me stay at home and continue homeschooling. But no I realized a few years ago that if I ever want us to have anything, be off of public assistance, then I was going to have to go back to school and then off to work.
I'm resentful and I just can't respect him. Help! I feel like I'm being disobedient in this area, but I just can't force myself to feel and act like I respect him when I don't.