Karen, I am waiting for an update also...
My Christmas plans will be at home with my kids. We have no family to go visit other than my 83 year old half-crazy grandmother and she is Jehovah's Witness so she does not want that "Christmas garbage" around her house. Don't think we will be seeing her this weekend)
On another note...I have to remove my siggy because of the husband
At least I was able to share a photo for a while...
Dee Dee, Mom to 2 handsome young men & 2 beautiful girls!
Crap. The new APA and I are going round and round. Typed up a long response and for some reason it got deleted, ugh.
Dee Dee, sending you a response now and boo to your husband. I really enjoyed seeing your beautiful girls.
I'm gonna attempt to post my marathon picture. I haven't posted pictures in forever, so I'm not sure I even remember how to. Here goes nothing.
ETA: Looks like all wasn't lost as it actually showed up.Please excuse my 'I'm completely exhausted, cold, wet, and I can't walk look'.
Last edited by kadas33; 12-22-2011 at 12:39 PM.
on the marathon photo! I am not sure what happens with those responses that disappear...I typed up a long one the other day and it disappeared also!
Karen I sent you a pm back. I can't tell on here that I have a pm so, thought I would let you know I sent one. Did your APA show you any indication you had a pm?
Dee Dee, Mom to 2 handsome young men & 2 beautiful girls!
Thanks!!! Yep, I got your response and will be responding again soon.Originally Posted by twinmom34
Karen I sent you a pm back. I can't tell on here that I have a pm so, thought I would let you know I sent one. Did your APA show you any indication you had a pm?
My son & I put together the Barbie house for the girls. I have put out all the presents and ate waaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyy too many Rice Krispies but I think I am ready to go to bed and get some sleep so I can be available to play, play, play tomorrow.
I got kind of sad today thinking of what tomorrow is in reality...the last whole family Christmas. I just don't understand why he can't be the father/husband he should be. In my eyes it is sooooooooooo easy! I want nothing more than happiness for my kids and always put them first in everything I do. He seems to care less that his kids sufferI a going to do my best not to think too much of it tomorrow and just enjoy the day.
As for all my single momma friends...Merry Christmas and may the New Year bring you lots of happiness!!! I appreciate you all for the strength you have given me this year!
Dee Dee, Mom to 2 handsome young men & 2 beautiful girls!
Hey Girls!
I am finally back to work after the vacation and it feels good to be back in the swing of things.
Well we went to the mediation meeting on Tuesday and baby daddy insisted on a paternity test, so we did the cheek swab. He did his own and I did my own. Then when it was time for Eli's turn the lady handed me the swabs and I said, "No, if he wants this test then he can do it himself." So I handed Eli to him and made him do the cheek swab. I know without a doubt that he is the father but all of that still made me feel so low and trashy.
After we did that the lady handed us a paper and said, "See you in three weeks!" I didn't realize that we can't move forward until the results come back positive. Which they will. So another three more weeks until we can hammer this all out.
I hope everyone had a great Christmas!
Dee Dee, I'm sorry that things are going as planned. I forget that things are so much more complicated then just leaving. So did the news affect your timeline? What is your next move?
Hi Marissa!Please tell us more about yourself!
Amanda - 28 (Proud Single Mama)
Amanda, the news did not affect my plan...it just affected my income
That sucks about he stand-still on the mediation. I am proud of you for makind BD do the cheek swab. He should be stuck with the dirty work if he wants to play dirty. Is he already paying child support or is this part of the outcome of mediation?
Dee Dee, Mom to 2 handsome young men & 2 beautiful girls!
Hey ladies! The Christmas madness has finally died down a bit here. Bella has been surrounded with tons of new toys, and mama got pretty spoiled this year too! It was a really great holiday and it was nice catching up with family I hadn't seen in a while!
Amanda, good for you making him do the swab himself. I hope he feels ridiculous when the results come back with a big glaring positive. Hope its all over quickly for you!
I got a box in the mail from sperm donor with a wrapped Christmas gift for Bella. The tag said "To Bella, From Daddy" - which immediately made me want to burn it. I dont know who he thinks he is, but he sure isnt her "daddy" - he hasn't seen her or spoken to her since she was 10 months old and hasn't provided a single thing to her in her entire life. He may have contributed the DNA, but he isn't her daddy (can you tell he raises my blood pressure?!) - it ended up having a really cheap stuffed animal in it. I haven't decided if I am going to throw it in her already massive pile of stuffed animals or the goodwill box.
Happy New Year! I pray for peace and happiness for us all in 2012!
Why is out room so dead lately? I hope it is just the holidays...
I plan on having a safe night at home. The husband is threatening to take the twins to a party with him as soon as he gets into town so I might have a long ugly night ahead of me!
If he goes to the party and leaves the twins home with me I will probably go to a good friend of mine's house to have lots of fun. I am hoping she will come over here instead since we have lots more to do at my house.
As for right now, I have no idea what the night holds...
Dee Dee, Mom to 2 handsome young men & 2 beautiful girls!
Hey guys!
Sorry I've been out of the loop. I blame it on the holidays.
Cassandra, I probably would of slipped it into her pile of stuffed animals. Stuff like that angers me so much. If he thinks being a "Daddy" is sending a crappy gift to her every 2 years then he is truly deluded. It makes me angry for you.
Dee Dee, how did your New Years pan out? I hope that it was drama free!
Amanda - 28 (Proud Single Mama)
That is exactly what I did. It was just a plain stuffed rabbit that got piled with her other hundred animals. Its not even the cost or value or utility of the gift that I'm mad about. Its the fact that he hasn't had anything to do with her in nearly 2 years and has never provided anything for her in her life yet has the nerve to send a box labeled "From Daddy" - yet he cannot bother to call and find out anything about her so that he could maybe make the gesture of sending something she may actually love or get good use out of. I'm still angry about it!
Well since my birth room is dead now I will be hanging out here more often and try to keep this thread alive!
So how is everybody? What's the latest with all the kiddos? Do we have any birthdays coming up?
Amanda - 28 (Proud Single Mama)
Sorry to be MIA lately, things have been CRAZY for me since right before Christmas. Thankfully they are finally settling down a bit now. Let's see, what do I need to update you ladies on.
Oh, there was the Christmas night blow out with dd, complete with her running out of my mom's house calling me a b!tch then refusing to get in the car with me. Needless to say, Christmas was a bust.
Christmas night my dh took my dog to the vet because he was sick all day. Come to find out he had eaten one of ds' socks and it was stuck in his intestine. He spent 2 days in ICU before they did emergency surgery on the Tuesday after Christmas then another 2 days in the ICU before coming home. Yep, that was a $2,400 vet bill...money we didn't just have laying around.
Things with dh got ugly and that was a whole can of worms that I won't get into. We had a hearing yesterday, but I didn't have to go thankfully. Still waiting for a detailed message from my attorney about the outcome of it. I'm hoping we can enter into a temporary agreement in the divorce in which he would not have access to the marital home and we'd have joint physical and legal custody of the kids and continue visitation as we have been. Fingers crossed.
And to top it off, I finally ended my friendship with my BFF for good. In dealing with all the drama with dh I realized I couldn't tell her about it because she and dh have suddenly become chummy. Of all people, she should be the one I could tell and I couldn't so I decided it was best we parted ways for good.
How is everyone else doing?
Oh wow, Karen. Sounds like the holidays were craptastic for you. Hopefully this will be a new year for you and you will get to move on from the divorce and everything that you've had to deal with in 2011. I still can't believe your BFF.
Amanda - 28 (Proud Single Mama)
Today is my birthday actually!
Happy Birthday!!
A 2 week break from work apparently meant a 2 week break from APA. Oops. Well, We got all moved out of our rental house. Yay, that sucked but it's done. I love living back with my parents. The whole sleep situation hasn't been fun though. I have had my boys very well trained when it comes to bed time. That training did come with some crying, but that's my parenting style. My dad on the other hand believes that no child should cry for any amount of time for any reason. Well, you can imagine that the move disrupted our routine a bit and caused me to have to retrain my little guy to put himself to sleep in a new environment. My dad had some objections, so I told him he was welcome to put him to bed if he didn't want him to cry. An hour and a half later my dad comes tip-toeing out of the room. I just shook my head.
I have found though that he doesn't like his pack-n-play, so last night I tried putting the boys to sleep together in the same bed. So far so good. Fingers crossed it stays that way. I would love to be done with the pack-n-play. Plus, they are just so cute sleeping together.
Christmas went well. I had the boys on Christmas Eve and then ex came and got them Christmas morning. No problems. Wasn't even too sad. It was actually nice to be able to go to church without him complaining the whole time.
Karen, sorry to hear about your Christmas and your BFF
So now it's back to work, and boys soccer season is about to start!!
3 posts in one day, see I told ya'll I would be living in here now.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY CASSANDRA!Do you have anything fun planned?
Ashley, I am glad you are liking living with your parents. My parents actually gave me an open invitation the other day if I ever needed to move back in, kind of shocked me but it was nice to hear. So how often does exDH get the boys? Besides the sleep thing are they handling everything okay?
Amanda - 28 (Proud Single Mama)
Well, well, well...the single mommas have come back out of hiding! Glad to see my peeps back!
Happy Birthday Cassandra!!!!!!! Hope you have a blast! Any special plans?
My home life still sucks and as the day looms I've become a little depressed thinking "This is the man I married to have a family with for a lifetime! Why can't he just do what it takes to be a family?" In my eyes it seems so easy to be a parent and a spouse, yet it seems as if being a parent/spouse is a chore that he despises! I guess I will get out of my pity party soon but I really am sad to see this era of my life coming to an end
I am excited about tonight! My boys play Division II college basketball (well, one son graduated in 2011 so now I only have one that plays) and the past 2 years they have made it to the Elite Eight Championship. (If you don't follow basketball...there are around 250 basketball teams in Div. II and at the end of the season the championship is slowly but surely cut down to one and basically being part of the Elite Eight meant they were 1 of 8 teams out of 250 still playing at the end of the season) At the game tonight they are going to unveil a banner honoring the past 2 teams for making it to the Elite Eight to hang in the gym. I think it is awesome my boys will both be a part of that history so I am VERY excited!!!!!!!!!!
Dee Dee, Mom to 2 handsome young men & 2 beautiful girls!
Just cupcakes with my girl and soaking up turning 23. I also got a new tripod and a kindle fire.
Dee Dee sorry to see that things are still bad at home. Hopefully with all of your plans that everything will turn a corner soon. That's awesome about your boys. You should be one very proud mama! And what genes you have to have two awesome basketball players! I would love for Eli to be involved in sports growing up. Did you do anything to foster the love of basketball or is it just something they have always loved?
Cassandra, glad to hear you had a good birthday. How are your plans for your trip this summer coming?
Amanda - 28 (Proud Single Mama)
Cassandra, happy belated birthday. Glad to hear it was relaxing, I'm sure it was a welcome respite from the daily grind.
DeeDee, I can completely understand your sadness and grief. BUT only your dh can take responsibility for his actions, don't beat yourself up over something that is out of your control. He's the one who decided to step away from his family and marriage, not you. You are doing what you need to do to protect yourself and your kids, give yourself the credit you deserve! You are one strong momma. You've been a single parent before and although it's not how you envisioned you'd be now, you can and will make the best of it.
Amanda, do you think you will move back in with your parents?
No I don't think I will. It's going to be tight when we move in May but I'm going to make it work. I'm going to save a large part of my refund for the move and hopefully kick us off to a good start.
What about you? I think I remember you saying youre moving from the house and dh is staying, right? Are you looking for another house or an apartment?
Amanda - 28 (Proud Single Mama)
I hope you can make it work on your own. It's always contentious to some degree living with the parents.
No, I think I'm gonna stay in the house after all. Dh has said he's not interested in staying as it was my childhood home. I don't necessarily want to be a home owner, but it's very comfortable staying there and my mortgage is only $30 more a month for my 3 bedroom home than I'd pay for a 2 bedroom apartment in my school district so it makes sense to stay.
Karen, thanks for the pep talk...we all need one every now and then so, I really appreciate it. I think I am just having a hard time dealing with the change this is about to bring. I am also glad to see you will be able to stay in your house. Although you didn't want to be a homeowner, in the end I believe you will be happy you have your house.
Amanda, I always played outside with my boys and enrolled them in youth sports as soon as they were old enough. Since they both have different fathers I believe I can account for some of my oldest son's advantage but not the talent in the younger son. DS23 has a HUGE height advantage. He is 6'7" and although the average person's wing span is equal to their height, his wing span is 7ft
I have loved sports with my boys so much I hope my girls enjoy it as much as my boys did. Although...I have always thought watching girls' basketball was equal to watching paint dry
Cassandra, I am sure you have told us before but, what is your major in school?
Dee Dee, Mom to 2 handsome young men & 2 beautiful girls!
I'm finishing up a double B.S. in Biology and Chemistry right now. Then I start my university's BSN program in August with plans to eventually be a CNM.
I am dumb I guess...what is a CNM?
Dee Dee, Mom to 2 handsome young men & 2 beautiful girls!
Certified Nurse Midwife
That was my guess but I was not sure
Dee Dee, Mom to 2 handsome young men & 2 beautiful girls!
Just started work today for the week. Eli has been sick since Sunday. He has some kind of virus that the doctor said that has to just run its course. He is still running a fever though.
How is everyone's week going?
Amanda - 28 (Proud Single Mama)
We have a solid 10+ inches of snow and its still coming down like crazy. Bella and I had snow ball fights all weekend, I love winter! University is still running like normal so I dont get to have a fun snow day and have to go to class today instead
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