Net???

[newmom84]

I want so desperately for this room to be active! I need some single mommas to talk to!

So what about a NET? Who's with me?

[kadas33]

I'm not quite single yet, but will be hopefully sooner rather than later. Just waiting for my attorney's okay to move out of the marital home. I was also a single mom raising my dd (who's 15) when she was an infant and toddler. Although dh and I were sorta together at that time, I was still basically a single mother with her.

[ushxcp]

I'll join....I'm seperated right now. Decided to divorce in June, live seperately right now, but we just need to do something towards divorce. All is very amicable.

Excited to get to know some of you single ladies

[Thaby]

I want to be a single mom and do all on my own...Just don't have the guts (or reasonable reason) to do so. Don't mind if I hang out here?

[Thaby]

What's NET btw?

[twinmom34]

NET= never ending thread...

Mind if I hang here? Anyone that reads my posts can see the direction of my marriage. AND I was a single mother to my boys before I got married in 2006 for 17 years.

[newmom84]

Yay!!!

We need some BTDT moms in here so I think everyone should be welcome!!!


How are you and your kiddos doing?

Those of you dealing with divorce or separation how is working out the custody going?

[ushxcp]

Kids seem to be doing fine. Obviously the littler one doesn't know what's going on but my 4 year old is very aware that mommy and daddy don't live together anymore. The lease on our house is through December, so for now my husband and I just switch while the boys always stay there. So I'm at the house Monday-Thursday nights, and then husband stays there Friday-Sunday nights. Working very well so far. In January I'm going to move in with my parents until the end of the school year, I'm a teacher, and I think he's going to his parents' as well.

All of our bank accounts and stuff are still together because this is very friendly. Kinda feels like a business transaction.

[twinmom34]

"ushxcp" I sure hope mine goes so well! I have not made a definative decision as to when and what I am going to do. Currently I have given it a year to change for the better. So, I do have a question...you have a 4 year old, how is he emotionally? My girls are 4 and I am sooooo fearfull they will be devastated!


My kids are a wide range of ages, 23 to 4. My 23 year old is a sweet heart so, I try to keep all talk quiet around him. My 21 y/o and my husband have not spoken for almost a year so, he knows a little of the drama (but he also still lives at home, so he lives the drama). My house is in an uproar at any given moment depending on my husbands mood/decisions for the moment I just can't take it anymore.

[ushxcp]

I'm Ashley btw. He's doing really well. I mean I don't know about any of this but he seems fine. We do talk a lot about us still loving each other but having to live apart, and that if he ever feels sad it's ok to cry. He doesn't really ever though. He did make one comment about wanting 4 nights with daddy and only 3 with mommy, ouch, but that's cause daddy gives him cookies and crap and mommy makes him brush his teeth...lol

[twinmom34]

Ashely, thanks for the into ... my husband and I separated for a week in February. My girls seemed to be ok with the whole situation but of course when they were in trouble or didn't get what they felt they needed from momma they would cry for daddy. I wish ours could be as friendly as yours sounds like it is! Makes me wonder why the two of you are choosing to live apart if you can get along so well????? Or is it that the two of you are getting along because you do live apart?


I have decided I really have no desire to "date" once we part ways. I am sooooo over and past that! I feel like I have tried for the last 20 years to be a good woman to someone and get crapped on in the process.

[Thaby]

wrong thread

[newmom84]

Ashley it really sounds like yall have things figured out. Its so great that you have your parents to live with.
What grade do you teach?

Dee Dee is it so much fun having twins? Im sure the baby stage is hard but I would think at 4 it would be a blast.

Me and baby daddy have actually been talking this week and civil at that. We have plans to meet next weekend so he can see Eli (for the first time) and we can work out what we want to do. He keeps going back and forth on what kind of involvement he wants so I hope we can talk face to face and hammer out a plan.

[ushxcp]

We're so friendly for the kids. It's not their fault we're divorcing, and we both play an active role in their lives so we mine as well get along while doing it.

I am the reason we are getting divorced. We've been together 10 years, married 7, and I haven't really been happy most of that time. He's a great guy but he doesn't possess a lot of traits I want in a spouse. Basically I should have never gotten married to him, but I was young and stupid and thought it was what I was "supposed" to do in the time line of my life. I cheated, and he found out about a year and a half ago. We tried to work on things but I realized I just didn't want to because there were obvious reasons why I cheated. So, he moved past the anger of me cheating and that's why I think we can be friendly now.

*Whew*

I teach 6th, 7th, and 8th grade. 6th math, and the rest I teach the English language learners. It is sure a challenge to do this all day and then come home and take care of my boys.

What do you all do?

[kadas33]

Wow, Ashley. My story is so similar to yours in that I'm the reason we are divorcing. Been together for 16 years, married for almost 9. Looking back, I too realized that he's not the right spouse for me either. He thinks I'm cheating on him because of all of the positive changes I've implemented in my life in the past year or so, but that's just not the case. I think he's just grasping at straws because he even asked me if 'I've changed my orientation'.

We are both still living in the marital home for now. We told our daughter who's 15 and she seems to be coping okay with the it. We have basically been living separate lives for several years anyway so it was no surprise to her. Since we are still living together, we have decided to not tell our son yet as it will be hard enough for him to process and even more so since nothing has really changed as far as he can tell.

[twinmom34]

Amanda, twins are HARD! I am not sure if it is because they are girls, if it is b/c there are 2 of them or if it is b/c I am 20 years older now but they. wear. me. out!!!! I had my boys while I was in highschool and raised them as a single parent until they were 15& 17. It was 100x easier raising them than it has been with the girls!


Ashley, I am a nurse. I went to LVN school straight out of highschool and then went on to RN school within a year from graduating from LVN school. I have been a nurse for 20 years and I love it! It gives me an income to where I feel self-sufficient and has awesome hours in my current job. My patients are wonderful, caring individuals and I can't imagine any other type of job.


My husband is pretty selfish and is what I believe to be an alcoholic. I have tried for 5 years now to get him to get with the program and this year I finally decided I was fed up! I am happier now knowing I will probably be divorcing within the year. I don't feel the stress of each and every arguement we have. I don't let the small stuff he does bother me anymore. He is very volatile and has extreme ups/downs. Just like tonight he was screaming at one of the twins for crying in the shower . Yea, scream at her, that will make her quit crying. I don't know, I just don't like a lot of things about him anymore. I often ask myself if he quit drinking and told me he was ready to get on board if I would still want to divorce???? Sadly enough I think I would!

[Thaby]

Please ladies I need moral support....http://www.americanpregnancy.org/for...d.php?t=328211

[Thaby]

Right now I'm thinking about getting a job, rent a storage unit, buy a piece of furniture off of CL in every pay check and put some money aside to get my won place. My only fear is doing all this and when me and DH get divorce I'll have to divide everything with him...SO I wonder if I should worry about getting a place and things after.
What do you think?

[kadas33]

Thaby--I'm going to read your other thread and PM.

[newmom84]

Kadas, what is your name if you dont mind me asking? And how old is your son?

I am an Office Manager. I like my job. Its a lot of data entry which is right up my alley. Plus they are real understanding if I have to take off short notice.

sorry Dee Dee about the running you ragged. I'm sure I will understand a little bit about that when I'm chasing a 4 year old around.

[kadas33]

Kadas, what is your name if you dont mind me asking? And how old is your son?

I'm Karen. My son will be 5 on Christmas Eve and my daughter turned 15 in March.

[twinmom34]

Good to know your name Karen I think it helps to be on a closer level


Thaby, I can only imagine how tough your life is right now.


Girls, my house is a tough house! I have a 21 y/o son that lives at home and the twins. They are my life and my core! I also have a 23 y/o son that I love just as much, he just doesn't live it at home so, it doesn't feel like my life is so intertwined with his.... But, my issue is my family! Like over the last hour it has just been me and the 3 kids. We have had a great dinner and everyone is in the living room having a blast. This is only b/c my husband is not home. If he is at home, my 21 y/o is in his room with the door shut and if we (me or the girls) want to interact with him it is always in his room. It is such a sad situation


Enough whining...what are you all doing this weekend? We are going to Oklahoma City Zoo and staying at a hotel to let the girls have one last summer hoorah!

[ushxcp]

Thaby, I think of you often and hope you have the strength to do whatever it is you decide to do.

Dee Dee, your house does sound tough.

This weekend I actually did a few things. Since my husband has the boys from Friday to Monday, we're going to shift a day soon so he'll get one weekend day, but I got to do happy hour and a movie on Friday. Then Saturday I did breakfast with my best friend and her family and then we went to a tattoo convention where she decided to get a tattoo. We had to go back for her appointment, and I had to leave before she was done because I had tickets to see Steve-O do some stand-up last night. He was so funny, and then after the show he mad the point to take a picture with every person who wanted one. It's now my new FB profile pic. I think I'll make today a lazy day before work tomorrow.

[twinmom34]

We are home. We had a really good time. The zoo was hot but we rode the tram most of the time. After the zoo we went to the river walk and had lunch. Went swimming and did lots of shopping. Overall, we had a really good time which was nice!

[kadas33]

Dee Dee--sounds like it was a great weekend for everyone.

My weekend was a total bust. Dh and I are switching primary custody every other week at this point, but since we still live together it's all so odd. It was his weekend with the kids so I felt like I couldn't really just chill at home but didn't have anything to do either so basically I wasted a lot of time just bumming around. Took an impromptu road trip about 2 hours south to eat at an awesome restaurant just to kill time and get away. Went by myself which was kinda lonely.

[newmom84]

Ashley and Dee Dee sounds like yall had a great weekend!
Dee Dee are yall as hot as we are here in Texas?

Karen sorry about the lonely weekend. I'm sure it will get better. What did you have at the restaurant?

I had a low key weekend as well. Not much you can do with a 3 month old anyway. Got some reading and cleaning done.



So glad we have a three day weekend coming up! Anybody doing anything fun for the holiday?

[twinmom34]

Amanda, I know I asked this before but, where in Texas do you live? Yes, we are hotter than he!! here! I.can.not.take.it.anymore!!!!! My yard is dead and my trees/shrubs are dying. We have had more than 80 days above 100 degrees this summer!


Ashley! It sounds like you had a really good weekend, way to go!


Karen, I think an impromptu roadtrip would be fun, especially to try out a new restaurant...but I see where it could be lonely I have told a couple of my friends that if I do end up with the big D in 2012 I plan to take a solo Alaskan cruise to "find myself again". I was really happy and content as a single mother before I got married and hope I will find peace one way or another in the near future.


As far as Labor day weekend plans go...I am a real party girl...I am going to work a 12 hour shift in the ER so I can get the time & a half holiday pay I have a goal to pay off my son's car by 12-31-11 so I work a lot of overtime and holidays in an attempt to reach my goal. I think I will be safer if I end up alone if I have his car paid off.

[newmom84]

Dee Dee I live in Austin. I can not wait for some cooler weather. I want to be able to take my LO outside.

Getting the car paid off is a great goal. I just bought a new car about a month ago so I have a ways to go. Are the twins in daycare or do they go to a preschool? I don't know ages of when they start stuff like that.

[twinmom34]

The twins go to daycare but once they turn 4 they have a "school like cirriculum". Here pre-K is only for low income, military dependents or kids who speak English as a second language. They will start kindergarten in 2012 which is waaayyyy too soon for me, although daycare for twins is a fortune! What about little man? Where does he go while you work?


I have a conference in Austin next April, I may try to do a meet-up! We live about 4 hours North of you.

[ushxcp]

Dee Dee is it your birthday today?? If it is...Happy Birthday!!! If not, APA is just plain wrong and I'm going to complain...lol