I haven't been posting for a long time but I need some Chrisitan perspectives on whether or not reconciling with my father who is terminally ill and very abusive is the "right" or "Christian" thing to do. He has bone cancer and was given 6 months to live. I want to reconcile, tell him I wish him well, that I care, and that I will be praying for him like I always have been. I feel like it is my duty as a Christian role model to my DD to be able to take this visible step in forgiveness and compassion towards a dying man. I am also worried that of he dies without my making peace with him, it will screw with my head and cause a lot of guilty feelings.
However, DH thinks that since the man is mentally ill and was very, very physically abusive and is currently very emotionally abusive I ought to just stay away. He supports me no matter what because he has no experience with a crazy, abusive parent. I am getting a lot of conflicting advice from friends and family.
DH said this evening that I don't seem to want to do this as my Christian duty and it isn't my Christian duty or commandment of my faith. I have forgiven the man for his past mistreatment and current mistreatment of me - but as a safety measure I don't speak to him. He makes me feel nuts and scared; he is toxic to deal with. But I don't want to miss this opportunity to do the right thing...which I think is speaking to him and trying to give him some confort during his last days. I live 1000 miles from him so it would be phone/email/mail contact.
Thoughts? Sorry if this is a little scattered, I am not even sure what I am asking. I just need some good Christian advice.