DH just got a new calling, he was released from EQ and put in as 1st counselor in YW. Ummm hello!!! We don't have any boys!!!! DH was never a scout, he is busy this summer going to girls camp with me to help me out, so he can't take time off from work to go to scout camp the next week. Grrr, Does this make sense to anyone else?? Why do they put people in there that don't have boys???
John would love to be put in YM. He's so burnt out on EQ. He's been either Pres or a counselor since we've been married, so for 4 years. We don't have any boys, and that's why he'd love to be in there. So he could experience some of what he might never get to otherwise. And also, he grew up living 50 or 60 miles from the church building so he didn't get an opportunity to participate in scouts or anything like that. He's volunteered to take almost any other calling besides EQ but the Bishop just laughs and tells him "you're not getting out of there any time soon"
John loves teaching primary, sunday school, whatever. He's never gotten to work with the youth and it makes him feel...inadequate? Almost like they think he can't, or something!
ooops...sorry, that totally turned into a rant about our ward
I'm sure it'll all work out for him. I know when I was in YW they didn't even expect/need me to go to camp-they had others in the ward doing that. Maybe it's the same for Scout camp? Don't they have YM counselors, and then "varsity scout leaders" or something like that?
He He He, yes you are right, YM not YW. Anyway, I am not sure how it will all work out for scout camp, as of now he can't go and with it being 5 weeks away I am sure they already have it all planned out. LOL ya right. I am sure it will be fine, he definatly wanted out of EQ so maybe he will have a good attitude about it and not complain too much. He thinks the best calling would be to help in the library. :rolly: Ha, I don't see that calling coming to him any time soon.
IMO it's better for someone who doesn't have children of a certain age to work with them. Like me? I'd HATE a calling in nursery or sunbeams, because I'm WITH kids that age ALL WEEK LONG! YW would be a nice break for me. My husband used to be in YM before we had kids and it was great because we had one young man who was a convert & his family had not converted. He really liked my DH and asked him to go with him on the 'father-son' campouts and stuff. Now that 'boy' is 19 and going to college in the town we've moved to and so they still get together for lunch once a month or so.
That is it, I am not answering my phone until after girls camp is done! We are 3 1/2 weeks away from leaving for camp and in the last 24 hours I have had 3 people from our stake staff call me and back out! Grrrrr! We are now looking for 1 craft leader, 1 3rd level certification leader and 1 YCL leader. Not very easy positions to fill last minute. Anyone want to go to camp and help. LOL!
aww that stinks. I hate it when people can be so unreliable.
But... I hate camping too so I probably back out.
Oh no you wouldn't I wouldn't let you.
How about if I can find some money in my budget if I get you a ticket to fly out here you can be our head cook, we just got word this morning that our head cook's mom is in the hospital and she needs to stay home with her. Or Tif, you are within driving distance of our camp site, drive on out and help me!!! LOL
I am sure it will all work out, but right now things are falling apart. And I didn't bring a lunch to work today becuase I was running late and I am hungry!Auugh! Thank goodness it is Friday.
So...where and when!?
You were kicked out of camp??? What the heck? I have been doing this for 4 years and have never had to send anyone home early. I'm very sorry that happened.
In washington the stake leaders had to send 4 girls home in the middle of the night for sneaking out of their cabin and meeting up with the boys that worked at the ranch. The boys were fired and the girls were sent home, not good. It was at Ensign ranch outside CleElem, WA about 6 years ago. Luckily I was a ward leader then and they were not my girls, but how awful. Their parents were called and they had to drive 2 1/2 hours to pick them up in the middle of the night. I bet that was a long drive home with mad parents.
I think that the baby blessing will be 4th of July weekend. I think. Either that or August...but it's coming up! And I'm so going...which means we're so going to meet, if it works out!
I grew up in Everett stake from the time I was 2 years old, then we moved to Marysville stake after we were married, DH has grandparents in Bellingham. That is so funny that you were up north, what stake were you in?
I'm sorry about your girls camp experience, where we go there are NO boys and we are the only stake that uses the camp site that week, so no problems there.
Tif you rebel... rowing over to boy's camp.
My one and only incident of this type (as a leader since I wasn't baptized til I was 19) was when I was secretary in YW and DH and I chaperoned a dance. We realized one of our girls was missing - she'd frequently end up missing and we'd have to go find her, she was kind of troubled - and another leader found her and a YM from another ward along in an empty classroom in the stake center. I have no idea what was going on but I was SO GLAD it was someone else who found them, not me.
If I remember correctly, that YW was then gone "to stay with relatives" for about a year and when she came back she looked like she'd gained some weight and there was talk that maybe she'd been pregnant and given up the baby... IDK. Sounded pretty 1950s to me. In any case, she was a lot more active in the church after she came back, and even starting inviting her nonmember friends from school.
I'm totally rambling here.
Since ladybug and Tif decided to hijack this thread I'll try and bring up a new topic.
Have you ever had your feelings hurt by someone in your ward? How did you deal with that?
Quick question. We are trying to conceive. It's only been a couple of weeks. Is fasting still okay if there is the possibility I could be pregnant? Thanks
I'd think it should be fine if you feel fine, yk? In the first trimester your nutritional needs aren't much different than when you're not pregnant. So even if you ARE pregnant, it's so early it won't make any difference.
Yeah, it's probably fine...although I tend to not fast at all during pregnancy (but only if I know I'm pregnant) and the first few months post partum...my body gets so out of whack if I don't eat during those times!
So I feel like a total loser...but I'm not going to church tomorrow, yet again. At least this time it's totally legit-Scharae's needing to stay home. She's either got some asthma complications going on or else a cold. I think it's allergies combined with the asthma, but her coughing is horrid. I was a little self-conscious yesterday taking her to the grocery store because I felt like every person was looking at that horrid lady who brings her sick child in public! I'm pretty sure she's not actually sick-no fever, clear runny nose, etc. But just in case...no nursery for her! John has to teach EQ or else I'd let him stay home with her...hope he has a blast taking Keira to Sacrament all by himself
We went yesterday, and it turned into one of those "Why did we come?" Sacrament meetings. Ack. I hate those.
First of all, my husband is in the EQ presidency and was asked by the YM leader to get elders to help pass sacrament, because the YM leader decided to have all the YM (we only have six ) wear their scout shirts to church. Ok, so IMHO, that is just wrong. That's sending the wrong message to these boys - that scouting is more important than their priesthood duties - but no one asked for my opinion on the matter so I suppose it doesn't matter! Well it ended up that a large percentage of elders decided to wear sea foam green dress shirts yesterday oddly enough, so my husband had to pass too. Which left me with 3 kids flipping out and we had to sit in the foyer and have sacrament out there. So I started off in a bad mood. I was really grumpy.
But the day did get better, slowly but surely. We had our friends over for dinner. They're moving in two days. Bad thing about a university town... everyone moves away after a fairly short time.
So since no one wants to answer my question, I will. There have been 2 times that my feelings have been hurt my ward. Once here, once in our last ward. The first time was when my grandpa was murdered. I was engaged, it was the most stressful time of my life. I told my VT, who was also the RS president, about it and also the bishop. But yet no one did anything... no one sent me a card, no one came to the memorial, there were no funeral potatoes, nothing. I'd been a member about 16 months, pretty active that whole time. What hurt the most was that my family who are nonmembers took notice of the fact that no one from the LDS church came or did anything or even offered to do anything for our family.
The second time was after Penelope was born. I asked the RS for meals every other night for 2 weeks. I have no family here, had only lived here six months, and here I was with 2 babies in a year plus a 4 y/o and no mom or MIL coming to visit for several more weeks. My two VTs would bring me meals, so I needed 5 more. I was told "Unless you had a c/s we only give three meals, your two from your VTs and then one more." Hmmph. Yeah. At first I was like, well that sucks. Then I kept thinking and thinking and thinking about it. And got really angry. And hurt. I had not asked for ANY help in any way since we moved here - nothing at all - and the one time I do ask for help (which is hard for me to do) I'm shot down?
I told my VTs about it and they took it upon themselves to call people and ask them to help us out. It turned out wonderful. They were great women both of them. But I was so mad at the RS for having set a "limit on service" so to speak. I think if a sister asks for help with something like that, there shouldn't be a cap placed on how much help she can get. It's NOT following the spirit. Their excuse was, "Well we have a lot of babies born in this ward." My comeback was "But you never have funerals!"
I totally missed your question, sorry!
I remember that when you had Penelope...my mom was in the RS pres in her ward and I mentioned it and she was appalled!
I actually haven't had too many causes for being offended. Well, not since I've been a grown and mature adult. In HS there were plenty...you know how teenagers are!
The only thing I can think of, and it was more offended on the behalf of others, was last year when I was in YW presidency. At a presidency meeting the Pres and 2nd Counselor (who happen to be Daughter-in-law and MIL) started talking about how we need to "address" a certain concern when it comes up again. They told me that we need to be sure that we outright talk to the girl and let her know it's unacceptable. The concern? Clothing that's not quite modest on Sundays. The girl? One of mine. And honestly...she was doing great to be at church. Her parents were divorced and she only made it every other week when she was with her mom. They wanted me to talk to her about her sleeveless dress...not tank top, not spaghetti strap-just sleeveless. I think it actually had ultra tiny cap sleeves. OMG...I was ticked, offended for her sake, and hurt, wondering if things like that were talked about in the Pres mtgs when I was in YW. They started going on and on about how permissive her mother and this and that-total gossip fest.
How did I handle it? I told them that I flat out refused to address the clothing my girls wore to church. I was willing to remind them that at mutual shorts were not allowed (yeah...welcome to Ricks College, I guess) but that was a "rule" that our Ward had put in place years ago. IMO opinion Sunday is for coming to church and learning, growing, feeling loved and feeling the spirit. It is not someplace to come and be told you're wearing something "wrong". What if she spent 20 minutes going through her dresses before finally coming up with that one, and thought it would be ok because it did have cap sleeves? The message she'd get sent was that she was unwelcome there as she is and needs to change to be acceptable. And also, what if there's a visitor (non-member) one week who's wearing something "worse"? I'd never ever ever say something to a visitor about her clothing! So there's a double standard right there. I did tell the other ladies that I was willing to mention something to her mother, in private, but I refused to do her parenting for her.
So....guess what the lesson was on the next week...the Pres taught a lesson on "modest clothing on Sundays". This offended me, too, because it was a very passive-agressive and calling-out sort of way to address what they felt was an issue...I was so so glad Cordy wasn't there that week!
The only things I can think of is when we first moved into this ward about 6 years ago, the RS pres came up and introduced herself, she asked what my name was and I told her "Lacy" then she goes on to insert her foot into her mouth without even noticing...her response..."we were going to name our DD that, but we decided to go with Lynsee instead, and she is sooo glad we didn't name her Lacy, she hates that name." Ummm okay, glad for your DD, but what are you trying to say? It was one of those moments when you think to yourself, oh my goodness, I am sure she did not just say that out loud. LOL The funny part is now she is my boss, I work for her and her family business and I really like her. So no hard feelings.
The other one was when I was asked to come to a Bishop training meeting and talk about the upcoming girls camp and what we wanted the bishops to do on bishop night, etc. The stake camp directors were trying to come up with a new rule that only bishops could come up to camp on the last night, not their wives, not counselors, not other leaders, etc....just bishops, it is very distracting to have 75 extra people come and interrupt our camp when we have been trying to build up to the last night...blah blah blah. We wanted the focus to stay on a great program for the YW. So this one bishop starts laying into me about how he wants all his counselors to come and doesn't get what my problem is and why would I want to change something that has worked for so many years. So I explained my reasons and he was not liking any of them. He was just very rude and embarrassed me in front of everyone, but I didn't back down, I stayed calm. The stake presidency even supported me and asked all the bishops to support me. So fine, it was going to be okay. Well, 2 months later guess who shows up to camp on bishops night with all his counselors and wives? GRRRRR...so we had extra guests to feed and accommodate that we were not planning on, and I had to put on my fake smile and act like it was okay. The cherry on top is that he also WAS my dentist, we have since switched dentists. LOL
Wow Tif I would have flipped about that too. I was in the YW presidency for a little while, and when we had a concern like that we either talked to the parents, or had a lesson on it, but never addressed a girl directly. That's not cool. I think there are much bigger issues to be worried about getting teenagers to be active in the church without making them feel bad about their clothes. Sounds like those two ladies were jealous of her young, skinny arms or something.
And Lynsee.. I mean, Lacy... that is so funny. People say the dumbest things don't they? When we announced we were pregnant with our first, the bishop's wife hugged me and said, "Oh I know you've wanted this baby for a LONG TIME!!!" But we hadn't... we'd only been trying a few months, even though we'd been married 3 years. People are so funny.
I just have to say that I love our little thread we have here...it has been really nice to get to know you ladies better and talk to people who understand.
So, like some of you, I check this CafeMom LDS moms board sometimes. I have been really shocked at some of the questions that have come up! I'm starting to wonder if there's a crack in the system where all wards & branches teach the same thing!
Example #1 - a woman said in her Gospel Doctrine (yes DOCTRINE not PRINCIPLES) the question came up about who do we pray to, Jesus Christ or Heavenly Father. And most people said, and agreed, that it's Jesus Christ! What??? I mean, that's pretty clear in the Gospel Principles manual. Plus, common sense.
Example #2 - there were a few ladies who thought masturbation was fine, and that since it's not in the scriptures (nevermind several latter day prophets' words) that it's wrong then it's not a sin. One even said if we taught YW it's okay to masturbate, there would be fewer teen pregnancies.
I'm not saying I know it all, or that I'm such kind of sexual purist , but heck at least I feel like I know the doctrine of the church a bit more than that. And I'm a convert!
...I don't think I have any words. Especially to that second one. Wow. um..."Dear HEAVENLY FATHER..." and considering we don't believe in the Trinity...that pretty much says it all.
And masturbation...um, yeah. I can just imagine standing in front of the YW and teaching them that it's ok. Pretty sure that studies have shown that it doesn't actually cut back on things like teen pregnancy. I don't see how it would...so you can get the satisfaction yourself, it's still not the same. Especially not for girls-they need/want the emotional aspect, too! Wow...