LDS Moms

[EvandAl]

No babies happening in this house

I'm sad but not about being done.
DH and I always talked about having AT LEAST 4 kids maybe more. But being totally truthful, DH is just not a Baby kind of guy. He just doesn't have a clue when it comes to a child 3 years and younger. He can't deal with crying, the loss of sleep, diapers, nothing. And I think I will go insane having another and doing 99% of those duties on my own. And he is 100% done. So I am just going to LOVE LOVE LOVE the ones I got! He is great 90% of the time with John now because he's not a "baby" but he still has a hard time with Alan, I rarely get to do anything because he doesn't want to keep him alone and we have no family close by. Don't get me wrong he REALLY loves our kids and wouldn't return them or anything LOL, he just gets stressed by the smallest thing when it comes to them. So I know we've made the best decision for us.

[BrandiB]

Alison I'm glad that you 2 have made the best decision for the 2 of you. I dont think its an easy decision to make. Infact after today I'm leaning more on the fact of just having one. Not really but he's driving me nuts today.
On a side note AF should be here tomorrow and I have no signs at all. Other then I feel like I'm constantly hungry.

[ulovettfox]

No babies happening in this house

I'm sad but not about being done.
DH and I always talked about having AT LEAST 4 kids maybe more. But being totally truthful, DH is just not a Baby kind of guy. He just doesn't have a clue when it comes to a child 3 years and younger. He can't deal with crying, the loss of sleep, diapers, nothing. And I think I will go insane having another and doing 99% of those duties on my own. And he is 100% done. So I am just going to LOVE LOVE LOVE the ones I got! He is great 90% of the time with John now because he's not a "baby" but he still has a hard time with Alan, I rarely get to do anything because he doesn't want to keep him alone and we have no family close by. Don't get me wrong he REALLY loves our kids and wouldn't return them or anything LOL, he just gets stressed by the smallest thing when it comes to them. So I know we've made the best decision for us.

DH and I always wanted 4 but I'm beginning to rethink that. He is a GREAT dad, the kind of dad that I always wanted my kids to have, mostly because he's always the kind of dad I wanted. My dad was not the loving kind and he definitely didn't want to do "kid" things, he spent a lot of time telling us to clean up or yelling at us because we were making too much noise, etc. But I actually told my DH one day several months ago that I was thinking that maybe it'd be better if we didn't have any more kids - it had been a rough day! But the reason I said it is because he really doesn't discipline our daughter at all. I dunno if it's because she our first and is a daddy's girl or because she is so mild mannered and well behaved most of the time but he really has no back bone when it comes to her. Granted she's only 2 but he thinks I'm being harsh when I put her in timeout or in the middle of the night when I refuse to let her sleep in our bed. I sometimes laugh to myself at how easily he is manipulated by a toddler, haha. But seriously it does scare me at times because I don't want to have 4 kids and I am the only disciplinarian in the household. I guess we'll see how it goes with baby #2.

[LuTruPeMo]

We never had a set # in mind when we got married, unlike a lot of couples we know. We knew we wanted kids, but no idea if that meant one or eighteen (more like one of course ).
I never had a period in December. It was right before Thanksgiving I think. I still haven't started! I took 2 tests, negatives. This is so frustrating. It's only a 1 in 100 chance of pregnancy after a vasectomy in the first five years (and almost 0% after that - it's been 3.5 years). Still, I wouldn't be upset... ;)

[BrandiB]

We did have a set # in mind however, after having Preston I have horrible bladder issues that I'm just not sure I want to keep having kids and make it worse. So we will see how many we end up with. I tested last night BFN, so hopefully AF will show up today or tomorrow and then we can start over again.

[BrandiB]

So this coming sunday will be our first sunday in our new ward. I'm super nervous and I'm not even sure why. My cousin is in my ward and she has a little girl thats just like a month younger then Preston so they will be in nursery together. I know several people in the ward but I keep to myself a lot. I never ask for help and I rarely talk to anyone unless I'm talked to. Not to mention that its a new ward but its also a new church building, this next sunday is the wards first sunday in this new stake center. Its going to be a little crazy.

[Brandles]

When we got married we always talked about having 2 more kids (my 2 older boys are from a previous marriage), but now my DH (non-member) is saying that our house is too small for another baby and he wants to be done. His decision is just breaking my heart... I want another baby!!! Plenty of people have 4 kids in a 3 bedroom house, right? My friend in my ward grew up in a 4 bedroom house and had 8 siblings. Any suggestions on how to convince him?

[BrandiB]

I have no advice on how to convince him but I would just suggest giving it a bit more time and then reapproaching the subject maybe in a year or 2.

[EvandAl]

We have gotten quiet in here again

I just had to share. We had a great weekend here. The boys and I made a quick trip to FL. It was our nephews 8th birthday so we got to go to his party on Saturday and then his Baptism on Sunday. It was awesome to watch. He is my SIL's youngest and they decided to let their Oldest who is the only other boy to Baptize his brother. They looked so sweet together in white and they have an amazing relationship despite their difference in age.

Plus I was so happy to get to go to church with family and not be alone. Makes me want to visit more often. and I just have to say I love my In laws so much. They are always such a great support to me, I always feel like I am one of their children. And I was extra excited by a gift they gave us. I had purchased a scripture study book to use with John for the New Test. and it was not what I thought it was and I was bummed and it just happened to be that my IL's got the book I wanted for us.(they actually got one for each of their kids families) it's a great book for studying the scriptures and I was reminded that I wanted to share it with you guys when I got an email from desert book with it listed
http://deseretbook.com/a/i/3700605?s...aign=spotlight


hope you guys are all doing well

[LuTruPeMo]

How fun! Lucy's baptism is next month. I'm nervous. I get weepy just thinking about it. Seriously.

[BrandiB]

I was thinking I was just a thread killer. Thats awesome that you got to go to the baptism.
And Lucy gets baptized in a month! Thats so awesome!

[ulovettfox]

My mom gave us the BOM version of that book for Christmas. I have wanted it since I first saw a friend's copy a few years back. My daughter loves reading the scriptures every night and even asks to see certain pictures in the book.

[LuTruPeMo]

Brandi's wanted for first-degree thread murder.

We got Lucy's baptism dress the other day. I have to admit, I got kind of teary-eyed helping her try it on.

[EvandAl]

Brandi's wanted for first-degree thread murder.

We got Lucy's baptism dress the other day. I have to admit, I got kind of teary-eyed helping her try it on.

I saw your pic on FB and she looks so sweet in it!!!

[BrandiB]

Aww you ladies have facebook? Look me up! Brandi Scott Bentley. I have Tif but thats about it.

[ashers]

Haven't posted in here for awhile but you ladies are the only ones who would understand the frustration I am feeling right now. I was finally feeling well enough to go to church and was actually looking forward to it! We got all showered and were getting dressed when DH went ghost white and about passed out! I got him to the bed and he started shivering and has a low grade fever! What in the world, we were both doing great, now he is passed out in bed, we have missed church now and I feel so guilty!! I know he cant help not feeling well and I dont want to spread anything around to all the little new infants and kids in our ward. They have actually asked us to stay out of church if we feel ill because of all the RSV and pertussis going around in our area. I am just upset!! Its so frustrating and hard in getting to church, especially the past few weeks. I feel horrible in not going and yet it seems our ward could care less. Thanks for reading, I just needed to get that all out!

[moosh34]

Haven't posted in here for awhile but you ladies are the only ones who would understand the frustration I am feeling right now. I was finally feeling well enough to go to church and was actually looking forward to it! We got all showered and were getting dressed when DH went ghost white and about passed out! I got him to the bed and he started shivering and has a low grade fever! What in the world, we were both doing great, now he is passed out in bed, we have missed church now and I feel so guilty!! I know he cant help not feeling well and I dont want to spread anything around to all the little new infants and kids in our ward. They have actually asked us to stay out of church if we feel ill because of all the RSV and pertussis going around in our area. I am just upset!! Its so frustrating and hard in getting to church, especially the past few weeks. I feel horrible in not going and yet it seems our ward could care less. Thanks for reading, I just needed to get that all out!

I'm sorry it seems that your ward doesn't care, but believe me when I say that I'm sure there are people who notice that you aren't there. I'm in the RS presidency and dh is in the Bishopric in our ward (we're in the slc area too) and there are often people we miss but we have two little children and I don't get out to visit or even talk on the phone that often (cuz it's hard to concentrate on a phone convo with two kids needing your attention.) I worry that some of these sisters (and one who is having a difficult pregnancy in particular) think that nobody cares. It's not true though. I think about them a lot and worry about how I can contact them and if they'll think that I'm pestering them or pressuring them. Don't worry too much about all those past weeks, try your best next week and when you are trying your best you don't need to feel guilty. Call the RS pres if there's anything they can do to help you. They'll be happy to hear from you.

On a separate note, DS gave his first scripture in Primary today. We practiced in the primary room yesterday after the worldwide leadership training. He did such a good job. I was so proud. The transition from nursery to sunbeams has been challenging. I think it's starting to get better. The sunbeam class is huge.

[LuTruPeMo]

Aww you ladies have facebook? Look me up! Brandi Scott Bentley. I have Tif but thats about it.

I will friend you.
=Heather Harper

[LuTruPeMo]

ashers - that is totally scary about your DH! Is he feeling any better? I hope it's nothing serious. I know that is so frustrating. I absolutely hate missing church. We actually kept all 3 of our kids home today because 2 of them were up with pukes/diarrhea last night. The oldest is fine but we are so tired of the petri dish of bacteria that is our primary, we just needed a break! I went for sacrament, then came home and DH went to elders quorum. Fortunately we live five minutes away from the church now.

On a separate note, DS gave his first scripture in Primary today. We practiced in the primary room yesterday after the worldwide leadership training. He did such a good job. I was so proud. The transition from nursery to sunbeams has been challenging. I think it's starting to get better. The sunbeam class is huge.

Way to go! That's great.
They split our Sunbeams into 2 classes, we had so many of them. I'm really glad they did, because now each class is about 6 kids, which is manageable. An awful lot of babies born in 2007, apparently.

[DucksLikeRain]

Haven't posted in here for awhile but you ladies are the only ones who would understand the frustration I am feeling right now. I was finally feeling well enough to go to church and was actually looking forward to it! We got all showered and were getting dressed when DH went ghost white and about passed out! I got him to the bed and he started shivering and has a low grade fever! What in the world, we were both doing great, now he is passed out in bed, we have missed church now and I feel so guilty!! I know he cant help not feeling well and I dont want to spread anything around to all the little new infants and kids in our ward. They have actually asked us to stay out of church if we feel ill because of all the RSV and pertussis going around in our area. I am just upset!! Its so frustrating and hard in getting to church, especially the past few weeks. I feel horrible in not going and yet it seems our ward could care less. Thanks for reading, I just needed to get that all out!

Ditto to what Moosh said. I'm also in the RS presidency and I know at every meeting we talk about people that haven't been there and if none of the 4 of us know why we find out. If someone's pregnant and we know they've been battling nausea, etc then it generally is assumed that's what's going on, but we usually still call after 2 weeks of no one seeing them. Do your visiting teachers at least keep in touch?

I haven't been to church in....a month? And it'll likely be months before I make it again. I sort of wish they'd release me. I'm 1st counselor in the RS presidency and the president tends to rely heavily on me in the spring because of commitments to the sports program at the high school...and I'm out of commission. But she won't release me. I feel so stupid not know how my teachers are doing-I have 3 new ones that I have actually never seen teach yet and they're all pretty green as far as teaching goes. I don't know how my chorister is doing-she tends to be flaky-and all I get from the president is "don't worry, everything's going just fine. I don't want you to stress." So instead I'm left here isolate out at my parents' house 15 miles away stressing

John took the girls to church alone today. I know he'd so rather just not go but he's really working on his attitude, seeing as how he's EQ president and the Bishop refuses to release him despite his crazy work schedule which leaves literally NO time in the week for meetings or visits and how we keep having baby/health drama and he has 3 exams a year that require 350+ study hours for each one...

So he's working on his attitude and took the girls and Scharae was in rare form and just a pill for him all through Sacrament. And then she went to class fine but she has a hard time moving from her primary class to Sharing Time. John said it was 15-20 minutes of her melting down like a 1 or 2 year old in the cultural hall today. And then she finally went and was fine. I had to have a talk with her and tell her that Daddy was going to be the same as me. My new rule with her, before I had to stop going, was that if she didn't go to Sharing Time with her class, and someone had to come find me, she would sit in RS for the entire time and wouldn't have the option of then deciding to go. It was becoming too much of a pattern/routine for her. And she is HUGE on routines. So that's John's new rule, too. She'll have to go sit in EQ if she doesn't go. But he's also going to have a talk with her teachers. He sat in on the class last week. It's a man who's youngest child is 18 and then a 20yo guy that are the teachers. So I wouldn't expect it to occur to them to give the four year olds a 5 minute warning before switching gears, but Scharae really really really has got to have at least a 5 and a 1 minute warning. So hopefully if John can catch them before class next week they'll give that a try. I just know if every Sunday is like this for him, his attitude will spiral and he will probably quit taking the girls without me, which just isn't good for them. It's not like it's a week or two...more like at least 3 or 4 months!

[ashers]

Thanks for caring ladies, I knew you would understand where I was coming from. DH is doing much better now, he fell asleep for about 4 hours after I got him in bed and he woke up feeling better but still looked horrible. He said he had a bad headache, so I am thinking it was a migraine that came on suddenly, he has had a few in the past and his mom suffers from them off and on. Got some food, Excedrin, and a Pepsi in him and he started to do even better. By 4 PM he felt like going to his parents for dinner and as long as he stayed hydrated and kept Excedrin in him he seemed fine. He was ready for bed way earlier than normal though so I knew he still wasn't 100%, and really only wanted to go to dinner because his dad had planned this big bbq meal and had invited my parents over too.

There is only one lady in the ward that I really keep in touch with and she is just a sweet heart, she offered to come and scrub my floors and bathroom when my m/s was really bad, her kindness made me cry. I have never heard from my VT and honestly dont know who they are. I know people care and that life is crazy busy (I know we always are) and our ward is huge and they have lots of people to look after and they know that I am expecting, so they are probably are just assuming we are home due to sickness which is usually true (DH had pink eye for like 10 days that just wouldn't go away and he had to miss work and school and my m/s). So I try to not let it bother me when I dont hear from anyone but sometimes an acknowledgment of our existence would be nice.

Neither of us have callings and I think that is hard on DH, he has always had a calling or two in any ward we have been in, it helped him feel apart of everything and that he was needed. I on the other hand am thankful that I dont have a calling right now, I dont know how some of you ladies do it being pregnant and with kids. My SIL was supposed to teach yesterday and my niece woke up with a fever and was throwing up, I wouldn't know what to do (I guess I will learn, lol). I applaud you mothers who keep your kids home when they are ill though, that is one of my biggest pet peeves. We have a lady in our ward who brought her 4 day old new born to church the week after Christmas, I wanted to slap her upside the head for exposing her child to all the germs at church. My MIL (a NICU nurse) is constantly telling parents at discharge to not take their babies to church until April due to all the sickness!

I am hoping that we can really make it back to church this week, we both need the spiritual upliftment that gives us. We have been working hard on getting our temple recommends renewed but keep missing church so its made everything that much harder. Our goal is to have them by the end of March so I hope we can keep it!

[ashers]

Okay BTDT mommas when did you start wearing maternity garments if you ever did? I have a few pairs that are just not comfortable to wear any more and have been looking into maybe investing into a maternity version. What are your thoughts about them? Sizing advice? Are they comfortable or awkward?

[DucksLikeRain]

I'm not a fan of maternity bottoms. But I also tend to roll the waist of my garments down so that it's on my hips because I fiddle with it all day if it's pulled up and I can't stand having the elastic around my natural waist. So I just have some larger waisted garments that I roll the waist down to be comfortable.

The maternity tops are comfy because of the elastic under the bust...at least that's how they made them the last time I bought them....5 years ago! I think I bought some between 16 and 20 weeks. Now I usually just use some of my larger tops. I am fairly large busted so I have some tops that have the bust line-drysilque I think they are?-and they've got extra room in the shoulders and bust. Those are great for me when pregnant because they're also longer. I think they might actually be longs. I also like the jersey tops that have no bustline in them, but I also have those in longs for use as maternity ones.

For future reference, IMO the nursing tops aren't worth it. I just used regular garment tops and pulled them down. The nursing ones have a split and you're still having to pull a layer down, but also a layer up. For me that top layer has a habit of working it's way up out of my bra and showing even if I'm wearing a fairly high-necked shirt

[BrandiB]

I dont remember when I bought them but I also hated the bottoms. LOVED the tops! They were so much longer!! I never bought nursing ones though I didnt see a point.

So my husbands grandma and sister are here and I think they want to go to church tomorrow and I'm just not feeling up to it. UGH.

[ashers]

I totally forgot that I posted that question on here! LOL! I dont know where my mind has disappeared too...oh wait I think the baby is draining my brain cells! Thanks for the advice Tif and Brandi, I am thinking I may need to by either some bigger bottoms or just give in and try the maternity bottoms, these just aren't cutting it, and the tops that are comfortable right now just aren't long enough to role the bottoms down and keep my expanding waist line from peeking out of them.

Brandi I am sorry that you are feeling obligated to go, I know how you feel, sometimes you just dont feel like it. Every Sunday my MIL puts us on a guilt trip for not going to church and then she says she is just going to have to come down and drag us there. I know she is just worried but it still doesn't help that I am already feeling bad for missing so much! Do what feels right for you...pretend to be sick if need be :O)

[BrandiB]

I told my sister in law that I think we should just stay home and spend some time together before they leave to go home on monday. Who knows if that will work. I know my husband is not going to want to go, he works grave yard tonight 7pm to 7:30am he wont get home until after 8am and then he's not going to want to be up for church at 12:30pm and then back to work at 7pm. So maybe we can get out of it.

[EvandAl]

Hey Ladies!

I have to admit I never wore g's while preggo. I wasn't active when pregnant with John and with Alan I just couldn't justify buying them since I was pretty sure we weren't having anymore kids.
I HATE the nursing tops. I have one on now because it's laundry day (and very needed LOL) so I had to wear it ugh they drive me nuts.
In fact I just ordered some new g's. Have you seen they now have Carinessa Tops? I heard they are great for nursing and that the sleeves are really nice on them so I got one to try. They are more money than the other tops but I thought worth the try.

So I have been LOVING church Lately Alan is in nursery now and so far doing really well. He cries for about a minute after I leave but then has fun the rest of the time. And we combined our jr and sr primary so now as a presidency we have the 2nd our free and it is soooo nice to be able to meet with them without chasing Alan everywhere and really being able to focus more on my calling and the other kids. Plus we have been making it all the way through Sacrament each week. I just feel sooo much better.

Have you guys seen the DVD Reflections of Christ? We had a Baptism on Saturday that they played it at and the Primary Pres. loved it so she played a part of it for the kids on Sunday and OMGosh! It brought me to tears, the pictures/music are just so spiritual you can't help but be moved. It's pay week here so I used my spending money to order it and the newest one Another Testament. I am so excited to see them. I think they will be great to just play whenever to help bring the spirit into the house.

Oh and I am so not getting my hopes up but I just keep getting this feeling with my hubby that things may be changing for him. He started talking about his future schedule and talking about Sundays and Church! He can't change his schedule until next year so this isn't soon but I'm hoping that he is thinking of coming back. I KNOW that there are a lot of men in the ward that he would get along with. I just have to get him there

I'm always thinking of you guys! I hope all is well!!

[ashers]

In fact I just ordered some new g's. Have you seen they now have Carinessa Tops?

So I have been LOVING church Lately

Have you guys seen the DVD Reflections of Christ?

Oh and I am so not getting my hopes up but I just keep getting this feeling with my hubby that things may be changing for him.

I love the Carinessa tops they are so comfortable and the sleeves stay in place! I am hoping that these will work for me throughout my pregnancy, if not they will for sure work while breast feeding it seems!

I am glad that you have been enjoying church, I am hoping that I can get back to that point soon. We have been having such a hard time going, having a good ward is everything and ours is blah. Primary callings are so fun and I am glad that you are getting to enjoy yours more since DS is going to nursery!

Reflections of Christ is a beautiful DVD, my IL's has the missionaries over for dinner and they shared this with us after. My SIL is not a member and it even touched her heart!

I hope that your DH can continue to have a positive outlook on church and what may be able to happen, even if its not till next year!!

[BrandiB]

My sister in law and I were talking about the new carinessa tops. I'm going to have to try them. I LOVE my carinessa bottoms!! I havent seen that dvd.
One of our counselors in the bishopric called tonight and asked us to speak in church on sunday. My husband told them that I would not but that he would. He's supposed to just introduce us to the ward. I get panic attacks when I have to speak infront of people. No way would I do it. We havent been to church since our first sunday we moved in, in Jan. My husbands work schedule is horrible, but now we should get to go every other sunday. Also another girl in my ward I went to high school with and she told me I could call her for a ride.

Al I'm so excited that your doing so well and that your husband is becoming more positive!

[DucksLikeRain]

Glad things are going so well, Ali!

You inspired me to duck into Deseret Book (our distribution center recently moved into an adjacent suite instead of up near the Temple) on my way to an appointment this afternoon. I grabbed 2 different sizes of the new Carinessa tops. Oh my goodness. I got home and tried one on and it felt so great! I love that it's nice and tight and fitting-like the tank tops I like to wear overtop of my garments and bra. I got a Medium Tall and a Large Tall. The gal there said that since I'm pregnant to go with the tall, so we'll see how they work in action tomorrow!

Speaking of garments and bras...before I went in I did some quick looking on the internet to see if anyone had posted anything about sizes, just some practical experience. I came across some LDS discussion forum-I think it was for LDS moms, but not sure-and in their thread about the new tops a whole bunch of them talked about wearing their bras under their garments and how these new tops make it even easier because they are so form fitting, you don't need your bra to hold it in place.

Correct me if I'm wrong...but you're supposed to wear the garments against your skin and the bra over the top. And the point isn't to keep the garment top in place, but the actual fact that the top is directly against you...???

John has to speak in church this Sunday. The counselor actually asked him if I would speak. John's all "um...she's on bedrest. She hasn't been to church in over a month. I don't think she'll come just to speak." Never mind the fact that I refuse to speak when I'm pregnant. My anxiety over it goes up by like 100% and I cry at the mere thought of it