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Thread: Secular Confessions

  1. #27841
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    Mandy, I don't know how you held it together. What a woman! Do you think she purposefully messed up your schedules on purpose, or is that utter incompetence?

    Bummer you didn't make it to the interview stage Ashley. I hope you have a good mums night out Friday.

    I'm feeling a bit better this morning about the whole job front. I might ask my dr to increase my Wellbutrin because crying like I was last night over a job change is not normal for me. I've left plenty of jobs, and sometimes with a bit of hesitancy/sadness. But nothing like this.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  2. #27842

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    Quote Originally Posted by demigraf View Post
    Yeesh. She sounds pre-menopausal to me. Which would only be made worse by the fact that she's only in the 6th grade.
    Had to LOL at this! Mandy your co-worker is a trip. I am getting like my DH with his "you are an idiot" looks and I probably would have shown her a look like that immediately upon saying such an idiotic comment about you being nice to her. People can be so ridiculous and adults can be so childish.

    And Ash so sorry you didn't make it to the interview stage. That bites! I have heard that teaching jobs in Western Europe and the UK are hard to come by and I understand your desire not to want to do office work. I am getting burned out at my office but I really don't want to leave because the pay is very good and they gave me a 12K raise. I would like a lighter schedule though because my house is falling apart IMO from me not being home enough and I feel bad for not being able to take Elle out to the park and zoo as much as I used to, especially now that she really likes going to these places and is becoming more adventurous. She frequently tells me she would like to go on an adventure and most of the places she wants to go aren't all that outrageous. She wanted to go to the top of a building or on a ferris wheel or to this new park we saw that has a big jungle gym thing that is made out of ropes but looks like a spider web. We went to the new park last weekend and she just loved it and even though I like to encourage her to, as my SAHM friend says I do to both my kids I encourage them to do "dangerous things at playgrounds" LOL, I was holding my breath when she climbed to the top of the spiderweb (it is around 20 feet high). I was proud of her though because she is afraid of a lot of things and hesistant about new places, all places really except playgrounds. She is like a park queen so I would like to take her to more parks but we really cannot give up my income since I make more than DH and DH has been working his job a long time and hates it so now that I am making good money he is trying to make a career change if he doesn't get the firefighter job in Chicago. He is one of the finalist and we will know in a couple weeks whether or not he has made the cut. If not he is thinking of going to work on the railroad, which sounds country and 1915 America to me but railroad workers make really good money and he has a friend who is head of the region now for CSX.

    Chrissy big hugs to you about your job change. I hope these couple weeks go by soon so you can get to work at the new place and put all this nervousness and anxiety behind you.

    Erin

  3. #27843

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    Quote Originally Posted by AmeriBrit View Post
    Molly, your IQ post will have the lurkers shaking their heads and muttering things under their breath. ;)
    I know, I almost didn't post it, but it was on the first page of Yahoo news. I actually don't know why the article focused on 'conservative beliefs' I just think it's interesting that there's a connection to paranoia and fear with lack of intelligence, and that leads to things like prejudice.

    I'm sorry about not making it to the interview stage... fingers crossed for you that the perfect opportunity comes up!

    Quote Originally Posted by Ky'sMom View Post
    I am getting burned out at my office but I really don't want to leave because the pay is very good and they gave me a 12K raise. I would like a lighter schedule though because my house is falling apart IMO from me not being home enough and I feel bad for not being able to take Elle out to the park and zoo as much as I used to, especially now that she really likes going to these places and is becoming more adventurous.
    Can you spend some of your raise on a housekeeper? It was really hard for me to do that when I was working, but it was either that or ignore DH and Abbey so I could clean during the few hours I had at home. That might give you a few more free hours a week.



    lost our bean to Triploidy Sep 2010

  4. #27844
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    Suja, the kid is soooo cute! I would probably just replace the stroller also.

    Ash, I'm sorry about the job. I know it's hard to get into teaching in some countries.

    Mandy, OMG I might have been tempted to do what we call the finger dance once she wasn't in visual range.

    Chrissy big Change is never easy but I do think that this is going to be a good one for you.

    Myles sorry you had a lot of annoying things happen. Though I gotta admit, I would be the one standing on the escalator...never heard of the rule of standing on one side. I always figured that if someone didn't want to just stand there, they would take the stairs.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  5. #27845
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    Quote Originally Posted by AbbeysMom View Post
    I thought this was interesting:

    Low IQ & Conservative Beliefs Linked to Prejudice

    And was afraid of being flamed if I posted it elsewhere.
    I agree that is interesting. And i have to admit that I have kind of always thought that (snobby side of me). I know that there are some very bright conservatives but the mass maybe not so much. Example would be in my state we are recalling our Gov for a variety of reasons. DH works in a factory and has to listen to his coworkers talk about how wonderful the Gov is....reality is they are factory workers and the Gov has done NOTHING for this population of people. It is just so illogical why they would support him. Now I could get why say Mr. Menard would support him.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  6. #27846

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    Hi all! Just wanted to say that I'm reading everything but not posting much. Sawyer is at a stage now where he wants to bang on my computer whenever he sees me on it and if he can't reach it he screams like I'm ripping his tonails out.
    He's sleeping now but I am in the middle of making a pirate ship out of box so duty calls!!
    Love you ladies!!

  7. #27847

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    LOL, Jen. Well moving sidewalks and escalators are also reasonably good tools for helping people go faster in addition to moving people who don't feel like moving at all. Anyway, at least here it's a fairly well-known convention - very easy to figure out by observation when you take trains at commuter hours and literally hundreds of people stream out of trains and share the same escalators.

    Dense population = everyone needs to be a little more cooperative with the higher # of warm bodies you come into contact with, each with his/her own needs. Takes an extra step to anticipate what others might need, or at least how not to be an impediment to someone else. City living sorts out the considerate from the self-absorbed pretty quickly.

    Ash, I'm sorry about the teaching position. It's a travesty that there aren't more well-paying teaching jobs out there when it's such an important job. You'd make a wonderful teacher too.

    Erin, I was gonna ask about your Dh's prospects with Chicago. He's still in the running. I hope you hear back something definitive soon. I think Molly had a good idea about the house cleaner and it being worth the extra time with your family.

    Chrissy.. give this one time. You'll soon be in your new job and learning the ropes. This transition will be behind you. xoxo

  8. #27848

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    I have to admit after only one day of no internet I feel completely lost here

  9. #27849
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    LOL Yeah I mean I think if I saw someone was trying to get around me, i would move over. Just not something I normally see. Course we don't have any escalators in our town....even the mall is one story. So the only time I would see them is if I went to the Twin Cities or was back in Milwaukee.

    So I know before I have said how much I don't like non-fiction books and rarely read them....well I'm just about finished reading this one. http://www.amazon.com/Escape-Carolyn...8025691&sr=8-1

    It is soooo good and so incredible to me that this happens in the US in modern times. And hard to imagine the cult mentality and how people could believe some of the stuff they were/are being told.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  10. #27850
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    Over here a lot of times, there are signs at the escalators that say to stand to the left so that people can walk on the right. My country bumpkin mother only went on an escalator once when she and I went to pick my DH (then BF) up from Little Rock airport. I convinced her to go on....she held on to me so tight and was so off balance that I don't think she'll ever go on one again....she was worse than Travis at 3 years old! He loves the "magic steps" and goes on them as much as possible if we see them anywhere. The other day, though, he stepped on when it was in the middle of a step and he awkwardly laid down as the steps went down while screaming, "Muuuuuuuuuuuuummy!!!!" (I just stood there behind him, laughing; bad, right? hehehe)

    If y'all ever get the chance, you should watch the English version of The Office....that is exactly how it is in offices here!

  11. #27851

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    I saw someone on my fb go off on a rant because "escalators aren't for standing on". Really? I hardly ever see someone actually walking on one.

    Jennifer, I've always been drawn to real life stories like that. They horrify and fascinate me at the same time.

  12. #27852

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    Oh, the book synopsis just gave me the chills. That poor woman. I can only imagine the all-out campaign underway by the people she escaped to defame and destroy her. Because of that alone, I'd be too paranoid to let my big photo fill a front cover the way she did. I have other reasons not to want to plaster my face onto a book jacket - primarily that I'd want people to actually buy the book ;) - but that woman is obviously brave. Her story kind of reminds me of another woman's I was reading about recently online, who "broke out" from the Quiverfull Movement. I first came across people from that movement on another mothering site, and let's just say that I do not agree with their definition of womanhood. To say the least. Although I've seen photos of some sporting some lovely head scarfs.

    OK. If I'm good, you won't hear from me again today because I have at least 12 hours worth of work to cram into the next 6. But let's face it. You probably will hear from me again today.


  13. #27853

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    Good luck Myles!

    I just had a renal ultrasound with one of the nicest ladies I've met in a long time (I mean in real life!). She was chatty and funny and she called me skinny. I almost asked her if she wanted to hang out sometime.

  14. #27854

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    I'm back.

    That's funny, kate. I would want to hang out with a woman who made me laugh and called me skinny.

    Want your opinion on this. I drafted a letter to my boss to let her know I'm drowning in work. Does this sound like I just don't want to pull my weight? I'm sure everyone else has too much to do, but I can't even see the light at the end of the tunnel (sorry about the acronyms and system references):

    A –

    You and M had mentioned to me that, if the T & D projects become really active, I might be able to step back from the RS project and remove myself from testing and other requirements-related activities. With the latest addition of work from TS (XML mappings), I believe it may be time for me to refer any questions/requests related to the RS project to DY from now on.

    I would continue to support questions on RS related to the D: Phase I, since we're currently building out the data model with regards to it. However - for example - we just finished updating the RS accounting flow with Controllers, and DY & I also told N & K that we would support unit testing of the Customer Setup screens.

    I’d be happy to stay on and support RS if needed. I just may find myself telling the CP/WQA team that it will take me longer to respond to their requests, if that’s ok.

    I just wanted to give you a sense of my bandwidth at this time.
    I'm just trying to put myself in the shoes of management and ask myself if it's a good idea to send this to her at all. On the one hand, it's good to manage expectation, and I'd want someone on my team to tell me if s/he can't hit her deadlines because I gave her too much to do. On the other hand, no one likes a complainer who took the time to write this while she shoulda been working.

    Thoughts? For now, this is just sitting in my drafts folder.
    Last edited by demigraf; 01-31-2012 at 01:41 PM.

  15. #27855

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    Well as much of an antisocial person as I am, I always think things like this are better handled face to face. Is there any way you could do that?

  16. #27856
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    I'd send it, Myles, if you do a lot of your communicating by e-mail. You know them best; will they reassign the work or would they rather you try to do everything and not do it at your best?

  17. #27857
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    I agree with Kate. I'd try to have that conversation face to face. I had to chuckle at your, "I just wanted to give you a sense of my bandwidth at this time."

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  18. #27858
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    Mylah, I think it's too wishy-washy. Too many "mays" and "mights" and "if that's okays." I actually got distracted by them. If I was going to do it, I would probably phrase it more like "I am not able to give my full attention to both projects with the recent increased activity on the T&D project, and I think I could delegate some of this to D and manage my workload better, or would you like me to prioritize it some other way?"

    This is my problem, this is my solution, brief conciliatory statement bowing to the fact that she's your boss and you're actually checking with her before implementing it.

    Unless she's super-insecure, you shouldn't have to use too much softening language, and it just makes you look more unsure.

    ETA: Also, unless it's a super huge deal, I think calling a face-to-face meeting about it would just blow it out of proportion. At least, with my boss it would. OTOH, I only see my boss in face-to-face meetings every few years.
    Last edited by 3andMe; 01-31-2012 at 03:34 PM.


  19. #27859

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    We all work remotely and my team is spread out. My boss is across the country, so no face-to-face. In fact, the deferential language I use mirrors some of her Southern mannerisms. I'm holding off on sending it now, since I think I just found an efficiency we didn't see before.

    You're right, though, L. Too many "mays" & "mights". Glad I ran that past you guys for when/if I actually do get around to sending it. Thanks!
    Last edited by demigraf; 01-31-2012 at 04:15 PM.

  20. #27860

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    Y'know what? Who cares about work. Bodhi just made his 2nd poop of the day on the potty. His 3rd ever. That's what matters.

    Wheeee!!!!

  21. #27861
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    I wish I could like this post!! Woo hoo!!

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  22. #27862
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    Yay, Bodhi!

    I agree with Lydia that if you do send the email, lay out the problem and solution as she described.

    Jennifer, I almost bought that book once. At some point I'll have to actually buy and/or read it.

    Chrissy, as far as I can tell it's incompetence on my co-worker's part, not malice. This time. Although she isn't above malice!
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  23. #27863
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    3andMe is offline Every day is a gift. It's just... does it have to be a pair of socks? Hopelessly Devoted
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    Yay for poop!!!!!! I mean, on the potty. I don't really celebrate it in general, despite what you may have heard.

    I always err on the side of incompetence over malice in making assumptions about other people's motives. Hanlon's Razor: Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity.

    Still, your co-worker seems quite strangle-worthy.

    After being weaned for six months, I have all of a sudden started having let-downs and spontaneous milk out of the blue. That, combined with my weight gain and my catastrophic menstrual bleeding, is making me feel more creeped out that something is awry in my body. My OB has already been testing me (I had an ultrasound and a uterine biopsy, both normal), but I have written to him about this latest finding.


  24. #27864

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    Yay Bodhi!

  25. #27865
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    L, I can't help but wonder if the author of that "Razor" is a distant relative. Add an O' and that was my name before marriage!

    I wish I had advice for you about the let-downs, but I really don't. I would be concerned, though.
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  26. #27866
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gwenn View Post
    Chrissy, as far as I can tell it's incompetence on my co-worker's part, not malice. This time. Although she isn't above malice!
    I think if I were her I'd be trying to find a job I could handle. I hate feeling like I don't know what I'm doing.

    L, I have no ideas but that does sound strange. I hope your ob can figure it out soon. And of course that it's not anything serious.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  27. #27867
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    You'd think, right? Why would you stay in a job that you just couldn't do?
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  28. #27868
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    So humor me posting my STC questions in here, since everyone ignores my posts in STC...

    I've been crampy and gassy ever since the day of the IUI. Looked it up online and found a lot of people complaining of cramping and gassiness after the trigger shot (same one I had). The last two days or so I'm less gassy but still crampy but different crampy. Like before it was painful when I used the bathroom. Now it's like a band around my uterus. What are the odds - just related to the trigger shot, or somehow a symptom of pregnancy? I would love feedback, even if you don't know. Just tell me you don't know. Or make something up and tell me what you think I want to hear.
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  29. #27869
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gwenn View Post
    You'd think, right? Why would you stay in a job that you just couldn't do?
    Agreed. My biggest thing at work is that my work is a reflection of me. I like it when my coworkers can say, "Christina did that. I know it's going to be right." I mean, they probably don't say that to themselves, but you get the idea. I don't want anyone else feeling the need to double check my work behind my steps. I want them to feel confident I did it right.

    I don't understand why everyone isn't like that. I mean, most of us have to work all day. We may as well put our best effort forward.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  30. #27870
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gwenn View Post
    So humor me posting my STC questions in here, since everyone ignores my posts in STC...

    I've been crampy and gassy ever since the day of the IUI. Looked it up online and found a lot of people complaining of cramping and gassiness after the trigger shot (same one I had). The last two days or so I'm less gassy but still crampy but different crampy. Like before it was painful when I used the bathroom. Now it's like a band around my uterus. What are the odds - just related to the trigger shot, or somehow a symptom of pregnancy? I would love feedback, even if you don't know. Just tell me you don't know. Or make something up and tell me what you think I want to hear.
    I don't have a clue. But every woman experiences pregnancy symptoms differently. This could be yours. I'm really hoping so.

    How soon before you can think about testing?

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


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