Katy how scary. I too hope that is the guy they are looking for!
Oooh Good Luck Karen!
Chrissy....was thinking about you yesterday. Sorry that this has been so hard for you. But it will definitely be a good experience for her. Though you are right in that you probably don't need to know everything!
Jennifer, 34, DH 36
In retrospect, I should've kept my big mouth shut. IMO though, it doesn't hurt anything to have a child evaluated if they're not meeting the developmental milestones (I know my kid is talkative, but she really isn't any more talkative than a 3 year old should be). I do understand however that it isn't in my place to point that out to someone that was clearly not looking for advice.
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I just gave notice. I've accepted a position with Alumni Affairs and Development at Cornell. I got a bit of a raise and that IT department is more controlled. The users can't dictate what they get and they only have a handful of software to choose from and everything is centrally installed and updated. I'm really excited. And sad.
Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
I'm gonna be a Gramama!
Chrissy that is good news! Sounds like a better working environment.
Jennifer, 34, DH 36
Wow, Chrissy, that's brilliant! You will feel much better moving on in to a new role I think!
Really?!? Is this the job you'd turned down late last year? How did John react? Congratulations, mama.Originally Posted by missychrissy
Ash, I missed the earlier info about your mom. Sorry to hear that she was in an accident. How is she today.
Suja, I would have probably made the same type of comment as you, thinking I was being helpful. As you said, there's no harm in gleaning more information from an assessment. Your friend probably just took it a little bit personally because she's inwardly worried about perceptions of her child. I'll take Chrissy's advice from now on too. I've been doing a lot of biting of my own tongue recently anyway for work and such. Every time I do, I keep seeing this old fortune I got from a cookie once that I kept in my wallet for a long time: "Only in silence can man readily retain his integrity."
Um, I guess. LOL.
Congrats, Chrissy. Hope you enjoy your new job.
So kid wakes up from her nap just now. Usually, she has a yogurt as a snack. Today, she says 'No yogurt'. Then she starts saying 'Mitta la'. Her nanny's name is Mirtha, so we thought she wanted something to do with the nanny.
Mirtha laugh? NOOOO
Mirtha lap? WAAAAAH
Mirtha what? I don't understand. WAAAAAAAAH
Show me. Points to the kitchen, 'Let's go over there.'
Now what? Points to the pantry. 'Mitta la'
Lightbulb moment. You want Nutella? 'Yes, Mitta la. Not Mitta la. Nutella. Paru want Mitta la.'
This is just like kimpo kimpo, except it didn't take as long to figure out.
For the record, I have an almost empty container of Nutella. She likes to "eat" with a baby spoon from it. Mostly, she digs around, gets a smear on her spoon and then proceeds to get a molecule of it in her and the rest all over her. It's good clean dirty fun.
Mmmmm Nutella!!
Congrats on the new job Chrissy!!! I am so hoping it will be a better fit for you.
Wanted to note I am like Chrissy as well and usually will not offer advice in regards to children or anything actually unelss someone specifically asks me for advice. People are way too defensive and offend way too easily and I am kind of a blunt person so I have had to learn not to say anything in a lot of situation except, uh huh. Even if people ask for advice and I give it a lot of times they will take offense from my advice. I tell them they shouldn't have asked if they didn't want to know my opinion.
I also didn't/don't worry so much in regards to younger children speaking. Ky did not speak a lot until he was nearly three and even then he didn't speak all that clearly. I could understand him but it took a while for everyone else. Elle is exactly opposite. She has a wide range of vocabulary and she speaks better than a lot of 5 year old's I know and she isn't even 3.5 yet. People are amazed she is only 3 even though she is tiny. She frequently can hold a long conversation with adults and her daycare staff are always telling me all the topics they discussed throughout the day.
One of my fondest memories is of moving into this house, and having a serious conversation with my neighbor's 5 year old about cloning. It was around the time Dolly the sheep was cloned, and really big news, and he wanted to know, so I explained it to him. Didn't have to dumb it down at all. His father found it amusing that I was talking to the mom about bras and his 5 year old about cloning. The problem with DD is that she is a clear talker usually, so it throws me a bit when she calls something by an unrelated name, because I'm expecting that what she's saying is a close approximation of the actual word.
I am very strongly in the intervention camp for young kids. If the kid doesn't need it, no harm done, and if (s)he does, then the sooner the better. One of my cousins has a kid that I strongly suspect is somewhere in the Autism spectrum, probably on the mild end. There are really no services there, so practically no intervention. His communication skills are seriously lacking. His social sklls are worse. He is 7 or 8 years old and has NO friends. I feel sorry for him.
Last edited by Suja; 01-25-2012 at 02:02 PM.
She's fine, just really angry that it happened. The insurance people are taking care of it. She also has to pay a fine for "careless driving." I talked to her today and asked her if she's driving more carefully and just got a 'mmhmm' in response. LOL.
Speaking of nutella, I could have used some to mix in with the peanut butter I just ate out of the jar! I have a real craving for sweets right now.
Homemade Nutella, anyone? I, for one, have never made this recipe because the jar would be gone in two seconds (along with a whole loaf of bread, cookies, ice cream, my chewed-down fingers...whatever I can find to top with the stuff). But I have tasted versions of it made at potlucks and it's crazy yummy.
Last edited by demigraf; 01-25-2012 at 02:22 PM.
Oooooh, now I know what to make my SIL for her birthday! She's a nutella freak!
Myles - Nutella on Madeleines. OMG, Delicious!
Every day is a gift. It's just... does it have to be a pair of socks?
Hopelessly Devoted
Good luck on the job front, Karen!
Congrats to you, Chrissy! How exciting for you.
I'm glad your mom is okay, Ash.
I try to keep my mouth closed about other people's kids in general unless I'm asked for advice. I am often asked about some skill that one of my kids is doing that is way advanced for their ages, so it's easy for me to say he's always been a good climber, or she's always been ahead in gross motor skills so the other parent knows that it's not expected for a child of the same age to do the same thing. I'll do the same thing about S's language. On the other hand, I have not really been around other kids who have been obviously delayed who have NOT already been evaluated. The ones I mostly meet who are even subtly delayed are usually premies who are in my twins group, and the parents and doctors are usually right on top of it.
Suja, I had a similar (but grosser) lightbulb moment with Baby S. this morning. He was pointing his finger and saying "Look at the bucket!" He was very insistent and I didn't see any of our buckets nearby, so I told him that. He said again, "Look at the bucket! It's right here, on my finger! Look at it!" I told him again there was no bucket in the room, that all the buckets were in the bathtub. He was getting mad at me and insisted that I examine his finger. He held it out. I touched it. I told him I couldn't see a problem, and definitely no bucket.
Yes, I was really slow. I'm sure you all are probably way ahead of me.
Anyway, then he put his finger in his nose, pulled it out, showed it to me again, and said, "Look Mommy, it's a booger! Right here on my finger." D'oh.
Our baby is 3 years old already!
Can I kvetch a little this afternoon? I am up to my eyeballs in corporate politics - the stuff is spilling out of my ears - and it's been incredibly frustrating. I don't know if I can explain it all without getting into too much detail, but I'll try. In a nutshell, my management has had terrible experiences so far with another team, and refuses to work with them to build something we designed. Our VP told their VP that we'll work with anyone under him except them. That VP agreed, but apparently didn't bear the message to the other team. So, since to build the new thing relies heavily on their knowledge, and we've been consulting with them on it, that team has started to assume they'll do the build and have "ownership" of the thing we're building. They're talking about it as though it's their project and are trying to set the agenda. In the meantime, my management is instructing me to move forward as though they have no ownership of it, having me proceed without their input, which ruffles feathers. I'm walking a very fine - unproductive - line here. Because I feel I'll end up cutting myself off from these people that I will ultimately depend on to get this project done. And my management doesn't seem to have any real power to demand the other team not get the input they want. I'm starting to feel like my team's just being really stubborn, but have no real tooth in the game (besides controlling the budget). So against the direction of my management, I've decided to accomodate and include the others in all the decisions I make for this project. Sounds simple, doesn't it? I have wasted at least 10 hours in the last week trying to placate and wade through these murky waters.
On top of that, I am extremely frustrated by this other project I'm trying to get done with an external company. They basically promised to give us a backdoor to their data, only to now find out that they've been leading us down a maze to figure out how to get to it. After 3 weeks of trying, we met with them to say we were stuck (at 6am today my time, I might add) only to find out we have to connect several hundred other dots to get to where we need to be.
So when I got a guilt trip from a friend because I am going to be late to her daughter's b'day party because Bodhi is starting some swim lessons on Saturday, it was the last thing I needed today. They live an hour away. And I found out the party is at a place where they have the room for a 2 hour time slot only, so we'll be lucky if we make the last 45 minutes. In a single text msg, she said, "Oh, I wish you'd told me earlier about your schedule conflict", and a few sentences later, she says "Don't worry about coming anymore. <My little girl> will have plenty of friends to keep her company." Why bother making me feel bad about being late if Bodhi's just one of many guests anyway?
I'm probably just grumpy, but am not taking this too kindly today.
Last edited by demigraf; 01-25-2012 at 02:57 PM.
I wouldn't dream of getting mad at a friend for having a schedule conflict for my child;s birthday party! Self absorbed much?
LOL at Baby S. And you, for touching his finger. EWWWW!!!
Myles, it really sounds like you could use some Nutella. Your friend is being huffy for absolutely no reason. It's a child's birthday party fercryingoutloud, not her coronation as queen of the known universe!
Yeah, I'm trying to picture myself responding the same way to someone who couldn't make B's party, and I can't see it.
BTW, Bridget, I'm sitting here eating a salad with a combination of alfalfa, amaranth and adzuki beans I sprouted in mason jars. It's delicious, and I'm wondering if you've grown sprouts too? If not, it could be a fun activity for you to do with your kids. I have plenty of seed supply to send you for free if you're interested. Sprouted lentil burritos were a hit, even w/ Bodhi last Sunday.
Last edited by demigraf; 01-25-2012 at 04:09 PM.
LOL!
That offer for sprout seeds/beans is open to anyone, btw. I can give instructions with them too, although mine would probably be a cut-and-paste from sproutpeople.com.
Every day is a gift. It's just... does it have to be a pair of socks?
Hopelessly Devoted
As I recall, I told you we would be late because we had gymnastics class, and you said "No problem! Come whenever you can!" or something incredibly welcoming and flexible like that.
Our baby is 3 years old already!
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No, this is a different one. It's downtown Ithaca so I'll be very close to restaurants, banks, shopping, etc. Same salary though. My boss is upset and I feel bad but it was really necessary. We've had an unhealthy relationship for a while. I almost feel like I'm getting out of an abusive relationship. I like him as a friend, but as a boss he's not always nice, he's rarely on time, leaves early, doesn't take initiative....the list is endless. I want to work for someone that cares about their work. He doesn't. I think he's just burned out but I am sick of picking up the slack for him.
Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
I hope the new job is great for you, Chrissy.
I got a notice in Josh's folder yesterday requesting the kids to wear black in support of anti-bullying. I appreciate the sentiment, but I was having a hard time explaining to Josh how wearing a certain color would mean that you support a cause like that. I thought the concept was a little over his head. I talked to him a little about bullying and thought they were going to approach it in school but Josh said they didn't say anything about it.
Ooh, Nutella. I was so stressed about my trigger shot this weekend that I went straight to the kitchen for some Tuscan bread and nutella after I was done. Mmm.
I give a lot of advice all day, so I'm kind of used to pissing parents off, but I try not to say anything in social circles unless I am asked. I'm pretty straight when I am asked, though.
But as far as early intervention goes, it depends on the issue. If a child is over three and not talking, I don't care about the long term outcome to be honest. It's the benefits in the short term such as fewer tantrums and other behavioral effects of good language intervention that make such a difference in the life of the parents and child in the short term that it's worth it. Even if the child would have gone on to graduate from Harvard with no intervention at all. Or even especially in that case. But if a parent isn't interested, they won't benefit much anyway so there probably isn't much point.
Then again, I really could care less about how well they pronounce things. At work today I had a bit of a vent because one of the screeners, who is brand new to the profession, is only screening for pronunciation and then I get the child and he can't even meaningfully talk -and she said nothing about it. I am certain there have been similar kids she has passed because they were easy to understand. Apparently the result of my vent is that another SLP had a talk with her about it and told her she needed to use her clinical judgment and look at the big picture, not the small picture. Apparently she cried. Which made me feel wonderful. But it needed to be said.
Chrissy, congrats on the new job! I think that was a very positive step forward for you.
Last edited by Gwenn; 01-25-2012 at 06:01 PM.
Me (38) DH (45) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12
Nutella...we have some of that. I don't dip into it though. Once in a while Josh has a pb and Nutella sandwich. When I snack I go for fried food and/or cheese
I never had nutella until I was in france and my family was putting on bread for breakfast. I thought it was just a french thing until I came home and saw it in our grocery stores. LOL
Jennifer, 34, DH 36
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I don't like Nutella at all.
Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
I used to not like nutella for the longest time and said it was a British thing to eat such things, but the longer I live here, the more my taste buds have changed. I was the same way with mince pies. Now I love them with a drink of mulled wine.
Myles, that work situation sounds so stressful. I never did enjoy working in an office environment for the reason of having to do things certain ways just to please certain people. I think I came across as blunt and probably a little rude a lot of times and a lot of people said they just put that down to me being American. I always let them think that since I figured they wouldn't try to change me if they thought it was ingrained into me to be like that!
Oh, and your friend is totally being over emotional with you about the party.
It's 8am here right now. I still don't feel great (sore throat, coughing, and run down) but i 'm going to have some coffee and whatever sweets I can find and will then be ready to face the day.
I used to not like nutella for the longest time and said it was a British thing to eat such things, but the longer I live here, the more my taste buds have changed. I was the same way with mince pies. Now I love them with a drink of mulled wine.
Myles, that work situation sounds so stressful. I never did enjoy working in an office environment for the reason of having to do things certain ways just to please certain people. I think I came across as blunt and probably a little rude a lot of times and a lot of people said they just put that down to me being American. I always let them think that since I figured they wouldn't try to change me if they thought it was ingrained into me to be like that!
Oh, and your friend is totally being over emotional with you about the party.
It's 8am here right now. I still don't feel great (sore throat, coughing, and run down) but i 'm going to have some coffee and whatever sweets I can find and will then be ready to face the day.
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Myles, your work environment sounds like a nightmare right now. I hope there's some resolution soon that appeases everybody involved. I'm sure it can't be fun for them either.
I'd take advice from you Mandy. You're my friend.
I'm sitting at my desk all teary eyed. I'm going to be an emotional wreck until I start my other job. I know I'll like it there. I'm just going to miss 'my' people here.
Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
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