Secular Confessions

**Gwenn** · 03-19-2011, 09:00 PM

Chrissy, that's great about the scholarship. Bobbie should definitely go if that school has what she wants academically. If Cornell would meet her needs better, she can wait a year and get the discount.

I get 5 sick days and 5 personal days per year. I can take sick time out of my personal days if necessary but not the other way around, and we can carry them over from year to year although I think they've given us a max. People used to accrue months worth of sick leave and then cash in all those days when they retired for a substantial amount of money, but I think they changed their policy to state that we can only keep 5 years worth. Irrelevant in my case - I take my sick days. Although I don't get sick as often in this new position so maybe I'll let some accrue eventually. We don't get "vacation" days.

We also get paid holidays (Thanksgiving, winter break, etc.) Summer is off without pay although I have my pay prorated so some is withheld during the year and I will still get a paycheck in the summer, which is really nice. I'd feel guilty about all the time I have off except I make about $15K less per year than I would if I didn't work for the district - and some of the contractors make that much more and also work over the summer (in nursing homes, etc.) so they make even more.

ETA: It's hard on the hourly staff, though. They don't get paid over breaks and holidays as they aren't on salary. I can't help but think that would just suck, because schools have lots of days like grading days, govt holidays, etc. that there is no school so the hourly staff doesn't work.

**missychrissy** · 03-19-2011, 10:26 PM

What I wouldn't give for a 10-month position. *sigh* I'm not aware of any 10-month IT positions at Cornell though. Maybe an administrative assistant one. I'd totally go for it if it were a Class D level at least. Then I wouldn't lose much pay.

**Gwenn** · 03-20-2011, 12:21 AM

Originally Posted by missychrissy

What I wouldn't give for a 10-month position. *sigh* I'm not aware of any 10-month IT positions at Cornell though. Maybe an administrative assistant one. I'd totally go for it if it were a Class D level at least. Then I wouldn't lose much pay.

Every so often I think of going to work for myself and then when I think of my summer vacations and regular paycheck I drop the idea. Hope that doesn't make me sound lazy, but I just like having time to be myself and not have to worry about stuff. When I first took this job, my thought process was that I'd have summers off to spend with my kids but who knows if that will ever happen...

**AmeriBrit** · 03-20-2011, 03:32 AM

I think the biggest thing that holds us back from moving to the US is the work ethic and healthcare situation. I do miss the people and scenery though and a lot of the other cultural stuff....sigh.

**3andMe** · 03-20-2011, 08:08 AM

Soren slept like a rock star last night -- ie, he woke up choking on his own vomit at 2:30 AM. It was scary, and I was glad he was in bed with us (except for the mess on the sheets). It just came erupting out of nowhere and was almost soundless except for a little gurgling and then the crying. So dh cleaned up Soren and I cleaned up the bed, and then we all went back to bed and I nursed Soren almost to sleep and it happened again... all over the bed. Vomit explosion.

We only had one more set of clean sheets, so I took Soren out to the living room after that and held him until he fell asleep. By the time I got back to bed, it was 5 AM and then Claire wanted to wake up. I convinced her it wasn't time, but 30 minutes later she soaked through her pull-up and wet the bed. So I'm up for the day, since 2:30 AM, and just discovered Soren is getting diarrhea, too. I think it's going to be a long day.

I consider myself an experienced mom by now, and I've never seen anything like that vomit out of sound sleep before.

**daylilies** · 03-20-2011, 08:51 AM

Poor Soren! I'm glad he was there with you. I'd never heard of throwing up while in a sound sleep either (except in passed out celebrity situations, like you said)
Bridget, I know I said I was going to get the book from the library on Friday but I was thrown off track because DH had the day off so we both went to pick him up from school and went off to do other things and I completely forgot. We've both had a bad cold over the last few days anyway so I didn't want either one of us hanging around the library for too long. If we feel better on Tuesday we'll go.
Did anyone see the moon last night? I guess it was supposed to look bigger than usual, but it looked the same here.

**Bridget** · 03-20-2011, 09:34 AM

Lydia, poor baby and poor you!

I do have to admit that the slept like a rockstar comment was awesome.

**3andMe** · 03-20-2011, 09:36 AM

Originally Posted by bridgetwu75

Lydia, poor baby and poor you!

I do have to admit that the slept like a rockstar comment was awesome.

Yup. I know I'm on APA too much when I'm lying in bed dripping in puke and all I'm thinking of is the best way to phrase my post.

**Bridget** · 03-20-2011, 09:42 AM

Oh, Kate. I started the book. Sorry I didn't wait but I'm sure you won't have a problem catching up. I'm only on page 29 and I started it friday. Every time my kids see me reading they bring me a pile of books to read to them.
the book is awesome. It's really speaking to me right now. I think it will speak to you too. I relate with Buddhism more than any other religion.
Savana is letting me take her to get her unruly hair cut today and I'm thrilled. It's always snarly and her bangs hang to her nose. I will have to get all the tangles out before we go so they don't call cps on me.

It's bad. She hates her hair being brushed and it's a battle I can't have some days.

**Bridget** · 03-20-2011, 09:43 AM

Originally Posted by Lydia

Yup. I know I'm on APA too much when I'm lying in bed dripping in puke and all I'm thinking of is the best way to phrase my post.

Totally! I have caught myself doing the same!

**missychrissy** · 03-20-2011, 09:44 AM

Originally Posted by Gwenn

Every so often I think of going to work for myself and then when I think of my summer vacations and regular paycheck I drop the idea. Hope that doesn't make me sound lazy, but I just like having time to be myself and not have to worry about stuff. When I first took this job, my thought process was that I'd have summers off to spend with my kids but who knows if that will ever happen...

I don't think that makes you sound lazy at all. You have a great position and are wise enough to keep it. I don't blame you one bit.

Originally Posted by AmeriBrit

I think the biggest thing that holds us back from moving to the US is the work ethic and healthcare situation. I do miss the people and scenery though and a lot of the other cultural stuff....sigh.

Honestly, I think if I could find employment for myself in another country I'd go for it for just those reasons. I'm sure it's not easy, but the healthcare and vacation times would far outweigh missing what's familiar. The few times I've looked at working abroad, you really need to have a specialty, which I lack.

Originally Posted by daylilies

Did anyone see the moon last night? I guess it was supposed to look bigger than usual, but it looked the same here.

I saw it. It was big, but honestly I wouldn't have known it was bigger than other times it's appeared big to me if I didn't previously read about how it was special. I took pics from my cell phone, but they look like crap and don't really show how large it appeared.

Lydia, that's so terrifying about Soren. I'm glad he was with you.

**Gwenn** · 03-20-2011, 10:18 AM

Originally Posted by Lydia

Soren slept like a rock star last night -- ie, he woke up choking on his own vomit at 2:30 AM.

That must have been really scary, and I hope your day improves. But that comment was awesome!

Originally Posted by Lydia

Yup. I know I'm on APA too much when I'm lying in bed dripping in puke and all I'm thinking of is the best way to phrase my post.

Originally Posted by missychrissy

Honestly, I think if I could find employment for myself in another country I'd go for it for just those reasons. I'm sure it's not easy, but the healthcare and vacation times would far outweigh missing what's familiar. The few times I've looked at working abroad, you really need to have a specialty, which I lack.

It's actually kind of a dream of mine to go work overseas for a year or so. I need to speak English for my job, but I'd love to spend some time in England or in Ireland. And those are both close enough to France that I could travel over there and practice my French. I did some research and apparently my profession is in shortage in Britain so it would make it easier to get a visa and all that. But with DH and the animals and the house and everything, I don't see that ever happening.

I actually have thought if I'd had some more warning about DH deploying, and if it he hadn't left in the middle of one school year and come home in the middle of another, I would have tried to go for that year.

**daylilies** · 03-20-2011, 10:34 AM

Originally Posted by Lydia

Yup. I know I'm on APA too much when I'm lying in bed dripping in puke and all I'm thinking of is the best way to phrase my post.

I just burst out laughing because that is so me. Things happen and I write APA posts in my head. LOL

Originally Posted by bridgetwu75

Oh, Kate. I started the book. Sorry I didn't wait but I'm sure you won't have a problem catching up. I'm only on page 29 and I started it friday. Every time my kids see me reading they bring me a pile of books to read to them.
the book is awesome. It's really speaking to me right now. I think it will speak to you too. I relate with Buddhism more than any other religion.
Savana is letting me take her to get her unruly hair cut today and I'm thrilled. It's always snarly and her bangs hang to her nose. I will have to get all the tangles out before we go so they don't call cps on me.

It's bad. She hates her hair being brushed and it's a battle I can't have some days.

It's okay! I have a bunch of books I'm supposed to be reading right now including one for a book club next month that I haven't even started--I may have to drop out.

Good luck with the haircut! Josh needs one too, but like I said, we both have colds

Plus I'm waiting for a coupon because he likes to go to a kids place that is kind of expensive, but they're always sending out coupons.

**Cosmosmom** · 03-20-2011, 10:40 AM

I have considered moving to Canada myself...especially when I see jobs there in my field. Not like the weather could be much worse than it is where I am now.

Plus I already have sort of a Canadian accent, at least I have been told that (tend to say eh a lot at the end of sentences). But I'm way too attached to our family...didn't even really want to move to another state when we were looking. Plus now I have my house and I'm super attached to it. So much that even if we won a big lottery, I am pretty sure we wouldn't move...just might do some upgrades like finish the basement and different kitchen counters.

I have heard that Dh's stepdad was one to puke in his sleep. Yet another thing that MIL hated about him. Baby puke is bad enough but grown man puke on you when you are sleeping...whole nother thing.

**daylilies** · 03-20-2011, 10:50 AM

OMG. I'm sorry but I don't think I could handle an adult puking on me.

**Gwenn** · 03-20-2011, 10:51 AM

Yeah, I couldn't handle that either. Did he do that drunk or was he sober? I'm not sure which would be worse...

**Cosmosmom** · 03-20-2011, 01:52 PM

Nope I don't think that he was drunk...and it happened more than once. Not sure WHY he couldn't just wake up a little and get to the floor at least or even a garbage can. Blech.

I'm not even sure that I have ever seen DH throw up and we have been together 13 years (he has only had more than a cold once and he's never been drunk).

It's almost 3pm, I'm still in my jammies and don't plan on getting out of them. It's cold and grey and raining...and Dh is sleeping so I have been on the couch watching TV most of the day.
Just when the snow is almost gone we are supposed to get more Tuesday night and into Wednesday I think. Wednesday is the second adoption class...9-5. OMG it's so hard to sit in class that long! did it for years but so not used to it anymore. At work I can change what I'm doing when for the most part and get up and walk around whenever I want for the most part.

**missychrissy** · 03-20-2011, 03:36 PM

Rich doesn't get sick either...thank goodness. I mean, I know he has since we've been together, but he's very private about it and always makes it to the toilet. Me, I have to have a bucket next to me if I'm really sick because just sitting up can make it come, and I can't stop it.

I just went on another shopping trip for Shannon. I hope she likes the things I picked out for her...like it or not, she's gonna do some cross stitch

I figured it was something that was easy because even I can do it.

**daylilies** · 03-20-2011, 03:56 PM

DH always made it to the toilet too

Or had a bucket.
I've never tried cross stitch. It's really easy?

**daylilies** · 03-20-2011, 04:33 PM

I don't know if it's awesome or really dorky that I just helped a friend find a book on google without knowing more than a brief synopsis. LOL

**missychrissy** · 03-20-2011, 04:56 PM

It's awesome!

And yes, I think cross stitch is really easy. I mean, I'm not someone that sews or nits or anything and I was able to figure out how to do it on my own. So it can't be hard.

**daylilies** · 03-20-2011, 05:06 PM

Thanks

DH just called and he's on his way home...there's something I wanted to do before he got home and I can't remember now! Hope it wasn't important.

**missychrissy** · 03-20-2011, 05:42 PM

I kinda wanted to go out to dinner tonight, but the girls had friends over and they stayed late into the day. It's easily $100 for just us and I'm trying to be careful about spending extra money so we have it for a down payment on a house and all...so we skipped going to dinner. I'm pretty lax and the kids can stay as long as they want, but it's sorta a bummer.

And now it's nearly 8 and I fear they've moved in because no one is making any motions to go home!

I might have to ask when they're going to go if it gets any later.

**3andMe** · 03-20-2011, 06:32 PM

Update on how the rest of my day is going:

They got into the markers while I was cooking dinner. And I was so happy they were coloring! At least they're washable. And at least all of my linens are washed and my down comforter is nearly dry and dinner is almost ready and I have a nearly full glass of wine at hand. Sigh.

**girlwonder** · 03-20-2011, 07:34 PM

Oh, Lydia, it looks like it has been a long day.

JoJo has been such a pill this weekend, all whiny and bossy. Ugh. Not a joy to be around.

We did manage to get out and see Black Swan last night. Two great big gigantic thumbs up for that movie. What a gorgeous movie and the sound engineering was so well done. I loved how they kept in all the sounds that you normally don't hear at the ballet that illustrate what hard work it is. And I am glad we saw it on the big screen because I might have missed some of the details (like the recurring pin-feathers on her skin or the unpredictable sounds of wings flapping). What a great movie. I love it when you see a movie that makes sense on all levels. And all the icky stuff didn't bother me too much, because it was a part of the story. Although afterwards, my husband said that maybe we are too inured to yucky stuff from watching "Spartacus" for the past month! Anyone else watch Spartacus? LOVE that series, but it is so gory and bloody that it was hard to watch at first.

**girlwonder** · 03-20-2011, 07:36 PM

Oh, and I read this a few days ago and thought it was interesting. Makes me feel a little better about my laissez-faire attitude towards teaching JoJo in an organized manner:

http://www.slate.com/id/2288402/

**Bridget** · 03-20-2011, 07:49 PM

Lydia! A day in the life eh?
I really want to see Black Swan. Problem being that while dbf will watch it, he won't likely appreciate it and I cannot hold my eyes open to watch a movie these days anyway.

I took Savana to get her haircut. I went against my die hard rule and we went to Walmart. It was the only cost cutter type place that was open today around here. I don't think it was much cheaper than going to my aveda salon so I think I'll take her there next time.
She really did not want to cut her hair. It's just certain change that she resists so adamantly. Anyway, she said she'd do it and when we got there we were walking in I felt her whole body stiffen and she said she didn't like the place we were at and she didn't want to do it. I just kept coaxing her and didn't show any annoyance or anger at all and she very begrudgingly went to the chair. The poor woman cutting her hair was trying so hard to make conversation with Savana to put her more at ease and everything she asked was crash and burn. It made me feel like we are so not normal.
What's your favorite tv show? What's your favorite candy? What's your favorite dinner? Let me guess, hotdogs? Did Santa come this year? Is the Easter Bunny going to come? Has the tooth fairy come yet?
Not one of those questions were relevent to Savana's life. The cutest thing in the world was that she answered all the santa/easter bunny/tooth fairy questions as if she believed. She said Santa came and she said she was excited about the Easter bunny. When I asked her on the way home what she was thinking about when Rachel asked her those questions she said, "I just didn't want to hurt her feelings in case she believes in that stuff."

Okay, do get home and I notice there's a chunk of bang that's longer than the rest. I ask Savana to bring me her scissors so we can fix it. She has a small, sharp pair of fiskars. I really trust her with things like that. She's like a little safely moniter and would never misuse them. But she came out and was overjoyed to show me she evened it out herself.

That chunk is now waaaay shorter than the rest. Like, an inch off her forehead.

**girlwonder** · 03-20-2011, 08:07 PM

Bridget - would he be more interested if he knew that it contains the most graphic depiction of a lesbian sex that I have ever seen in a mainstream movie?

**3andMe** · 03-20-2011, 08:33 PM

Originally Posted by katycat24

Oh, and I read this a few days ago and thought it was interesting. Makes me feel a little better about my laissez-faire attitude towards teaching JoJo in an organized manner:

http://www.slate.com/id/2288402/

That's a great article. It's also interesting, because one of the particular things that turned me off about the Montessori preschool I toured a year ago was how in one room Claire was playing with a set of different-sized wooden pegs that fit into different holes. She was putting them in and rearranging them, and some of them didn't fit and I asked her if she thought that was right. The teacher came right over and showed her which one went in which hole. She would have gotten it on her own, or at least I would have let her try to figure it out for a while. I'm pretty sure that's not the Montessori method, but if that's what they demonstrate for a parent on a tour I don't think I'd want my kids in that classroom.

I've been reading a lot more about how the content of the learning doesn't matter so much at all - everyone's going to know their abcs and their numbers eventually (although dh scoffed at that and held my sister up as an example for never learning math), but the ability to delay gratification, the curiosity, the patience, the concentration, everything that is not memorization and test-centric, is the best for learning in a global sense. My children are very excited about learning to read and learning about numbers, but only because dh and I are so enthralled by them. We point out how useful and fun they are. Plus we just can't read to them as many hours of the day that they wish we could.

Bridget, I'm so glad the haircut went as well as I can imagine it having gone, especially with the nonsensical chatter. Savana is so sweet to answer as to not hurt her feelings. I need a picture of her new haircut, chunk missing and all. I have the twins get their hair cut with dh at the same time, so they can all feel like it's special occasion.

Katy, back to media- you reminded me to tell Myles that dh and I have been watching Mad Men and we LOVE it!!!!!!! So much that I think about it during the day, as if it was a new boyfriend. It takes us about three separate evenings to finish a movie.

**daylilies** · 03-20-2011, 08:38 PM

Originally Posted by katycat24

Bridget - would he be more interested if he knew that it contains the most graphic depiction of a lesbian sex that I have ever seen in a mainstream movie?

That was a really good movie. But oh my the body horror. I couldn't handle it. I just started looking away whenever she starting screwing around with her fingers or toes or started taking off clothes. LOL

My mom just sent me a picture of the kittens she got in October.

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