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Thread: Secular Confessions

  1. #17701

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    Quote Originally Posted by AmeriBrit View Post
    That's cool, Kate; sounds like a fun job!

    I love camping but my DH is a city boy, so I've never been with him, but me and my cousins and sister used to camp out in the woods behind our houses all the time when we were teenagers....and there were bears in those woods...we were very naive! When my boys get a bit older, I'm sure I'll convince DH to go camping; there are some great places in the UK to camp out.

    Y'all, I cut my hair even shorter today...please, tell me it looks OK? This is the shortest I've ever had my hair in my life...I love it at the minute but then I keep looking at myself and thinking 'what did YOU do to your hair?' lol

    It is very cute!!! I like the length on you. It frames your face. Plus hair will always grow back.

    Erin

  2. #17702
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    I agree Ashley....hair looks very cute on you!

    OMG, we were with the doctor like over 2 hours. Various tests. Got to have the TB read monday and get the labs done. Plus she thinks DH has a hydrocele so he's getting an ultrasound on that monday. He hurt his groin pretty well in 2006 and while he had it looked at in 2008, it wasn't acting up. Every so often if he sneezes funny or moves weird, it will bother him for a while and than go away. I suspect he's had a minor inguinal hernia. Not sure if they will recommend wait and see or surgery...hopefully not surgery as he doesn't have much time off work left.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  3. #17703

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    Remember the little boy who told Savana and Kai if they are bad that they go to the devil?
    Well today he ventured to think about how cool it would be if his flashlight could shine so bright he would see what was underground. I was like, "Oh cool, what do you think you would see?"
    "The Devil."

    I said I wondered if he'd see any worms or hibernating animals which turned the conversation around nicely. Then he said that if we shined it up we might see God. Savana asked me who God was. He told her God is a magic guy in heaven and so she asked me what heaven is.
    I couldn't say anything in front of him because I just can't have kids going home telling their parents that I said this or that about God. So I told her we'd talk about it later because it's private.
    So I just told her that some people believe that God made everything in the world including people and animals and flowers and trees. She laughed and said, "Well that's not true at all. People were first so tiny they weren't people and then they looked like monkeys for awhile.
    I told her that's what I think too. I hope I didn't go against dbf too much by that conversation. He wants me to tell her God is real so I don't influence her too much and she can decide for herself. He has no idea what he believes. I've asked him several times. He doesn't think about stuff like that.
    I don't want to tell her God is real. I don't want to tell her my mom is heaven. I don't think that means she can't decide for herself when she's older. I just won't lie to her and tell her I believe something I don't believe.
    Just thinking outloud here.
    Last edited by Bridget; 03-04-2011 at 03:40 PM.

  4. #17704
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    Quote Originally Posted by daylilies View Post
    I just applied for a DJ position on an online radio station that plays NKOTB and related musicians. It took me a few takes to get audio samples of myself that I liked, but I'm proud that I did it. I'd be shocked if I got a show, but it was fun to go out of my comfort level!
    Woo hoo! How fun!

    Quote Originally Posted by AmeriBrit View Post

    Very cute!! I'm getting mine cut this weekend.

    Bridget, I wouldn't tell the kids something I don't believe either.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  5. #17705

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    Josh made his first comment about how someone looks today We were at the library and a bunch of special needs people walked in. One guy in the back had Down's syndrome but I wasn't really worried because he'd seen them before and never said anything. However the man was also overweight and Josh kind of laughed, pointed and said "Look mommy, I see a big fat man." I was mortified. I pulled him aside and said that we don't laugh or make comments about how people look. I don't know why he picked that particular guy to say something about. It's not like he'd never seen a fat person before!
    I just went on to explain that everyone looks different and it's not something to laugh at. Mommy and Daddy look different from each other, some of his friends look different, etc.

  6. #17706

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    I love the haircut Ashley!
    As for telling the kids something I don't believe--I believe in making kids aware of different beliefs and letting them decide for themselves. I know he'll learn all kinds of religions at church school and in school itself. I forget what class we took but it was either middle school or early high school and we read a bunch of different religions' creation stories. I don't really understand why you wouldn't tell your child about something you don't believe in.

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    Quote Originally Posted by missychrissy View Post
    In fact, my original plan for AZ was to go hiking/camping on some trail with Shannon myself...leaving the kids and dh behind in NY. Then she started talking about bringing her gun to protect us from illegals and I lost my nerve! And, she really did want to meet my kids too.
    What season was it? I remember some friends of my sister and brother visiting AZ from NY in summer and they all went camping. And ended up packing up their tents and going to a movie theatre just for the air conditioning! It was 110+ and baking inside the tent - they couldn't even sleep!

    That said, I have been camping in AZ up in the mountains. It was beautiful there but a long trip. We used to camp at least yearly in NY but only once since moving west in 1987.

    Quote Originally Posted by daylilies View Post
    Okay I'm done...Who did you guys want to go through who didn't?
    I actually wanted to see the red-headed kid go through. I liked him, and I liked that he wrote his own music. But he probably couldn't have won being so openly gay. I'm certain that's why Adam didn't win a few years ago and although he didn't hide the fact he was gay, he didn't write songs about it and perform them on Idol, either. The whole thing makes me angry.

    Quote Originally Posted by missychrissy View Post
    I have no desire to go to Vegas at all.
    Have to agree with you. I'm not into gambling and I just don't "get" Vegas.

    Quote Originally Posted by daylilies View Post
    I didn't like Clint...he might have been a good singer but he didn't have the presence and he seemed too nervous and unstable to me. I'm glad they saved Ashthon. I like James the best.
    Love James. And love that he has Aspergers!

    Quote Originally Posted by katycat24 View Post
    I don't like camping. I think a lot of it depends on where you are camping. Texas in the summer is humid and 100 degrees, and sleeping in a tent is simply suffocating. Plus the wildlife - scorpions in your shoes, rattlesnakes love to snuggle up in sleeping bags with sleeping people to get warm, water moccasins in the swimming holes, tarantulas everywhere. I don't remember getting a lot of sleep on those camping trips. Plus Dad wasn't good with bringing food. One trip he brought water, marshmallows and squirrel stew.
    Sounds much like AZ camping! Although we don't have a lot of squirrel stew here. Not enough squirrels. It would have to be rattlesnake stew or something.

    Quote Originally Posted by daylilies View Post
    I just applied for a DJ position on an online radio station that plays NKOTB and related musicians. It took me a few takes to get audio samples of myself that I liked, but I'm proud that I did it. I'd be shocked if I got a show, but it was fun to go out of my comfort level!
    Awesome, Kate!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by AmeriBrit View Post
    That's cool, Kate; sounds like a fun job!

    I love camping but my DH is a city boy, so I've never been with him, but me and my cousins and sister used to camp out in the woods behind our houses all the time when we were teenagers....and there were bears in those woods...we were very naive! When my boys get a bit older, I'm sure I'll convince DH to go camping; there are some great places in the UK to camp out.

    Y'all, I cut my hair even shorter today...please, tell me it looks OK? This is the shortest I've ever had my hair in my life...I love it at the minute but then I keep looking at myself and thinking 'what did YOU do to your hair?' lol

    Okay, you are gorgeous and the hair totally suits you.

    My linguist mind is curious so I hope you don't mind my asking. Is "at the minute" a Southern or British expression? It's not something I hear a lot.

    Quote Originally Posted by daylilies View Post
    I love the haircut Ashley!
    As for telling the kids something I don't believe--I believe in making kids aware of different beliefs and letting them decide for themselves. I know he'll learn all kinds of religions at church school and in school itself. I forget what class we took but it was either middle school or early high school and we read a bunch of different religions' creation stories. I don't really understand why you wouldn't tell your child about something you don't believe in.
    I think she meant she wasn't going to expect them to believe something she didn't believe - not that she was going to hide it from them. If that is what you meant, Bridget. I completely understand that.
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  8. #17708
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    I feel pretty good about myself today. I did an evaluation for a child and found that due to some very upsetting family circumstances that left the mother with absolutely no support system, she is leaving the state. So we rushed through her evaluation and did an IEP for her (we don't normally write those and leave them up to the teacher, but I was afraid the teacher wouldn't do it or she wouldn't enroll him because she was leaving), and even finalized all the paperwork so it was legally binding while she was at the meeting so she could have it in hand and not wait for it to come in the mail. That way she could get her child services immediately in his new school. Otherwise I was afraid he would slip through the cracks in the system. She was really grateful. Afterwards an email came through from my former principal to the list-serv with some preachy message to think about what it means to exceed the expectations for your job. Well, I think I did that, and I felt really good about it.
    Last edited by Gwenn; 03-04-2011 at 06:33 PM.
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  9. #17709

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    I don't remember if I commented on your hair Ashley, but I think it looks great. You're adorable.
    Good for you, Gwenn!

  10. #17710

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    I must have missed it when Brett wrote and performed a song about being gay...I also hate to that that's what stopped him or Adam (Lambert, I assume) from going farther in the competition.
    I think, gay or not, Brett just wasn't the type to be on that show.

  11. #17711
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    Quote Originally Posted by daylilies View Post
    I must have missed it when Brett wrote and performed a song about being gay...I also hate to that that's what stopped him or Adam (Lambert, I assume) from going farther in the competition.
    I think, gay or not, Brett just wasn't the type to be on that show.
    It was his last song in Hollywood week. He wrote a song about being in love and referred to the one he loved as "he" and was about being true to yourself. They didn't play it up much but if you listened to the lyrics it was pretty obvious. But you're probably right - although I think he was talented.

    Yes, I meant Adam Lambert but couldn't remember his last name.
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  12. #17712
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    Quote Originally Posted by daylilies View Post
    Josh made his first comment about how someone looks today We were at the library and a bunch of special needs people walked in. One guy in the back had Down's syndrome but I wasn't really worried because he'd seen them before and never said anything. However the man was also overweight and Josh kind of laughed, pointed and said "Look mommy, I see a big fat man." I was mortified. I pulled him aside and said that we don't laugh or make comments about how people look. I don't know why he picked that particular guy to say something about. It's not like he'd never seen a fat person before!
    I just went on to explain that everyone looks different and it's not something to laugh at. Mommy and Daddy look different from each other, some of his friends look different, etc.
    Aw that's rough. I remember being humiliated when my girls first saw an African American woman. They pointed at her and I can't remember exactly what they said...nothing disparaging or anything, but noting that she was 'different' from us. I said, "I know, isn't she beautiful?" and then saved the talk about not pointing at people or commenting on their appearances for the car. I never fully felt like I handled that quite right, but I was at a loss.

    Quote Originally Posted by daylilies View Post
    I don't really understand why you wouldn't tell your child about something you don't believe in.
    I'll tell my kids what others believe, but I wouldn't ever tell them there is a God because I don't believe that. I think that's what Bridget meant as well.

    Quote Originally Posted by Gwenn View Post
    I feel pretty good about myself today. I did an evaluation for a child and found that due to some very upsetting family circumstances that left the mother with absolutely no support system, she is leaving the state. So we rushed through her evaluation and did an IEP for her (we don't normally write those and leave them up to the teacher, but I was afraid the teacher wouldn't do it or she wouldn't enroll him because she was leaving), and even finalized all the paperwork so it was legally binding while she was at the meeting so she could have it in hand and not wait for it to come in the mail. That way she could get her child services immediately in his new school. Otherwise I was afraid he would slip through the cracks in the system. She was really grateful. Afterwards an email came through from my former principal to the list-serv with some preachy message to think about what it means to exceed the expectations for your job. Well, I think I did that, and I felt really good about it.
    That's really incredible! I got a warm feeling in my heart just reading that. I'm sure you've made such a positive impact in their life. It's really hard to measure.

    My brother is taking me out. I need it.
    Last edited by missychrissy; 03-04-2011 at 07:23 PM. Reason: used the wrong "there"? wtf? lol

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  13. #17713

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    I see what you mean about telling the kids what other people believe. Have fun with your brother!

  14. #17714
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    Quote Originally Posted by missychrissy View Post
    That's really incredible! I got a warm feeling in my heart just reading that. I'm sure you've made such a positive impact in their life. It's really hard to measure.

    My brother is taking me out. I need it.
    Awww...thanks.

    Have a great time with your brother! I had so much fun with my brother while he was here. I miss him. We've come a long way from when we were always at each others' throats as kids!
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  15. #17715

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    Who won during Adam's season?
    We don't really hear from a lot of the actual winners...I think the runners up do better because they don't have to stick to whatever Idol contract they have. Daughtry and Kelly Clarkson (although she won) are the biggest...and I think a couple winners or runners up went to country music.

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    Carrie Underwood has made a ton more money that Kelly Clarkson, I believe ... she's certainly more talented. But she is a country singer.

    I agree that it's usually the runner up who is better. I can't remember who won the year Adam was on ... some boring, noncontroversial guy. Which has happened 3 years in a row now.
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  17. #17717
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    Wait a minute, you mean Adam Lambert is gay??? Seriously, I really liked most of his album and actually was the last whole album I bought. Love me some Glambert.
    Kris Allen is the guy that he lost to.

    Eh I can't really stand Carrie Underwood. Loved Kelly though and DH and I did buy her albums. Course I just cannot stand country music (or most rap/r&b....only a few of those I like).

    And Kate, don't worry too much. I have been the "fat lady" where kids have said, daddy, look at the lady's huge tummy." Parent so embarrassed..... But really I am in denial...I do have a big tummy and back than I had a REALLY big tummy. I knew I was 360 lbs and fatter than the average fat person. It bothered me so much more when adults ignored me....it was weird because I lost so quickly that year and to go from nobody holding doors open or acknowledging me....to the opposite.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  18. #17718

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    Oh, Carrie Underwood! I can't stand her either.
    And Kris Allen, he had one song I kinda liked, but I haven't heard anything from him since.
    I admit I didn't "get" Adam Lambert for a long time. I didn't understand how he fit into today's music. He seemed very 80's glam to me. But I think he's grown on me.
    I understand there are fat people in the world, but that doesn't make it okay for kids to comment. I think I overreacted because when I spoke to him about what he said, he burst into tears I felt so bad. I don't think he knew any better.

  19. #17719
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    No I don't think that it's ok to comment about others either. Though I think that even as adults, we do that way more than we realize ourselves...we just usually have a tiny bit more tact to do it outside of the persons hearing.
    It sounds like he really didn't realize it wasn't nice (and I think that most kids that did say something to be back than were probably about 3-5 looking)....but what a good moment to talk about how we all have differences and that is ok but it's not nice to point out certain ones. it's pretty complicated to a little dude to realize it's not nice to say someone is fat even if it's true....yet if someone has a nice coat, that is ok to comment on because it's nice.
    And than you throw into the mix compliments that you say to be nice...even if don't really mean it. OMG, it gets complicated!

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

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    Quote Originally Posted by Cosmosmom View Post
    No I don't think that it's ok to comment about others either. Though I think that even as adults, we do that way more than we realize ourselves...we just usually have a tiny bit more tact to do it outside of the persons hearing.
    It sounds like he really didn't realize it wasn't nice (and I think that most kids that did say something to be back than were probably about 3-5 looking)....but what a good moment to talk about how we all have differences and that is ok but it's not nice to point out certain ones. it's pretty complicated to a little dude to realize it's not nice to say someone is fat even if it's true....yet if someone has a nice coat, that is ok to comment on because it's nice.
    And than you throw into the mix compliments that you say to be nice...even if don't really mean it. OMG, it gets complicated!
    This is the kind of stuff we try to teach our older kids with autism. I think all preschoolers have a point where they do this because they genuinely don't know it hurts someone's feelings. And they soon learn that it's not okay and stop. My kids don't learn it's not okay, even when people tell them that. Which makes it really challenging to teach!
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

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    Remember I posted earlier about DH always wanting to help animals and loaning people money he doesn't have?

    Well, he wants me to transfer money out of savings to pay to ship a puppy home from overseas for one of his friends. Not our puppy, the friend's puppy. But he's going to ship it home. We can afford it (for a loan, not to donate), and he says we'll be paid back, but I have to laugh that he said this within 24 hours of my posting that.
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

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    Edit that to say: he wants to pay about two weeks of my salary to ship this dog overseas. His money, but equivalent to that much of my salary. Yikes. Not so sure about this.

    He says the total cost is twice that, he is lending him half otherwise the puppy will be put to sleep. Puppy apparently saved his buddy's life (otherwise they can't take dogs home). Puppy will be driven in a truck across hostile territory, flown to the US and medically cleared, then flown to where his friend is.
    Last edited by Gwenn; 03-04-2011 at 11:00 PM.
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  23. #17723
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    If I was really attached to a dog, I would pay that. Shoot, if I went to the breeder we got cosmo from, his pups are now going for $800 and they are a mixed breed pups. So yeah i could see paying in the thousands for a dog that I loved that saved my life (especially if death was the dogs only other option )

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

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    I would do it in a heartbeat for a dog that saved DH's life. But this isn't our dog! But if I didn't have the cash I would want DH's friend (or his friend's wife) to pay to get the dog sent home so I could pay them back. Not sure if the dog is put to sleep or just left behind as a stray ... in a combat zone in the desert. Probably putting to sleep is the more humane option of the two.

    Yes, did I mention I'm supposed to be the one wiring the money.
    Last edited by Gwenn; 03-04-2011 at 11:42 PM.
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

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    Quote Originally Posted by Gwenn View Post
    Awww...thanks.

    Have a great time with your brother! I had so much fun with my brother while he was here. I miss him. We've come a long way from when we were always at each others' throats as kids!
    That's me & my brother. We fought when we were kids...actually, I was quite mean to him. But we're exceptionally close now and never fight. I think the last significant argument we had was in 1995 and I can't even remember what it was about...just that it broke my heart.

    Are you going to wire the money? It seems like a worthy cause...if you can afford it.




    My brother tried to burn my car up. Not on purpose...I was drinking so that means I was smoking. I was in the back seat and went to flick my cigarette at the same time he tried to tease me by putting my window up and then down. It crushed my newly lit cigarette, then broke it. When the window went down it fell between the seat and the side of the car. There was no way to get it and he poured soda down the side to put it out. We could see it burning against the side of the seat...but couldn't reach it. I know I'll be irritated with him in the morning. If it smolders and actually burns my car, I'll be much more than irritated.

    But other than that it was a good night.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


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    Oh...and I guess I should officially feel old because only 1 chick knew the electric slide and was trying to teach it to her 3 other friends. Oiy.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


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    Quote Originally Posted by missychrissy View Post
    Are you going to wire the money? It seems like a worthy cause...if you can afford it.
    My DH is fanatical about dogs. I think he'd divorce me if I didn't. We've been saving everything we can to pay for a kitchen and other repairs to get the house rental-ready, and he wants to buy a truck, plus he'll no longer be working and we're likely planning a move coming up ... so there is money but we can't afford not to be paid back because we really need that money.

    Quote Originally Posted by missychrissy View Post
    Oh...and I guess I should officially feel old because only 1 chick knew the electric slide and was trying to teach it to her 3 other friends. Oiy.
    Oy is right! Although I confess I actually don't know the electric slide despite being old. But I know I should know it!
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

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    Mandy, I hope you sort something out with the dog situation. I hope they pay you back in good time. About the phrase 'at the minute', it must be British English since that's mostly how I speak these days. The language is so different here. When i'm flustered, my brain struggles with what words to use. It's crazy how it's the same language but not really.

  29. #17729
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    Man, I was very busy for one day and I'm like 6 pages behind, and I don't watch American Idol. I feel so lost.

    CUTE haircut! It's definitely not too short.

    I kind of like camping. I like being out in the wilderness, but I also like being really comfortable, but I also dislike "car camping," so there is this struggle in me. I remember going camping with a group of friends after I moved to California, at a campground, and someone at an adjoining space had a tv playing that crackling fire program AT THEIR CAMPING SPOT OUT IN THE WOODS, right next to their fire pit. I don't know if the didn't want to be bothered actually making a real fire, if they didn't want to smell like smoke, or what.

    I grew up going camping after multi-mile hikes into the mountains, far away from everything else, eating real food (scrambled eggs with bacon cooked over a campfire), not being able to hear anything except the call of birds and the rustle of wind in the trees, but also being so tired my legs would shake and my dad saying we could only rest for five minutes every hour because any more and it's too hard to get up again. Having to undo my backpack to cross rivers because if I got swept under I would need to get it off my back quickly or I would get stuck and drown. I remember kind of living on the edge of pain, fear, and awe. It was kind of an Outward Bound experience every time.

    I'm old too, and I don't know the electric slide, although I do know people were doing it in my day.

    I hope you can decide on your dog dilemma without too much distress, Gwenn.


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    oh Lydia...that seems excessive to me! I could see the attraction as an adult, but I couldn't take my kids through that sort of thing. I'm afraid even if they liked it, I might not let them go.

    Whether you knew the electric slide or not, wasn't there usually an entire group when that song played? I swear just last month I was out and they played it and at least 30 people danced it Maybe I'm remembering wrong though.

    I did do the Macarena. There was a bunch that knew that song.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


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