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Thread: Secular Confessions

  1. #17551
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    Wow, that's awesome, Bridget about the home schooling. I'm sure your kids will love being home schooled since you're such a good teacher to them already!

  2. #17552

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    That group of homeschool moms sounds really cool, bridget. I hope you get a lot out of hanging with them.

    I just wanted to share one more link of Bodhi from last week: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nz_iOLiV74A I love how he makes me do something that I really don't want to do because it makes me feel silly, and then he has a way of looking at me that says "Woman?!? What are you doing, you nutjob?!?"

    Got lots of work to do today. I really should skedaddle...

  3. #17553
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    Awww...I lol'd at that look he gave you!! Too cute and funny

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  4. #17554
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    Quote Originally Posted by missychrissy View Post
    All hair texture is different and I simply have fine, thin hair. It's sensitive to just about anything. I know it needs a cut, but if I had it trimmed every 7-8 weeks it simply wouldn't grow. My hair grows painfully slow as it is. My goal is to get a good cut and find a regime that works without destroying my hair in the process so I can hopefully go longer than 8 weeks between trims.
    Last night I mixed up a batch of egg whites and mayonnaise. This is the best my hair has felt in years, so my tentative plan is to get a good cut and do this treatment once a week.
    Oh I must have missed the part about your hair being fine. I hear the words wavy and I just picture something else. Do you have a good stylist? They might have some ideas of the right products and style that would work for you.
    It does take forever to grow out hair when you trim it a lot....I have bangs which is why I have to go in every 7-8 weeks and long as I'm there, I get the back trimmed also....kept it healthy but it's taken years to get it this long.

    Eggs whites and mayo...never tried that one myself is that for conditioning?

    I am irritated because my Pantane recently changed and I'm not sure that I like it now....might be on the hunt for new products.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  5. #17555
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    I used the salon products for well over a year, probably closer to 2. They didn't make any difference in the health of my hair at all, and I was more religious about having it cut/trimmed then too. After all that time and money I decided it's not worth the effort. I'm just going to do my home remedies for a while and see if that makes a difference.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  6. #17556

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    Keep up with the home remedies. You will find something that works. My aunt here is ALWAYS telling me I need to go get my hair done (even though she also constantly complains about how there are no good hairdressers in Atlanta ) especially after I had Elle and my hair was a big, balding (due to PP hormones and BFing) frizz ball.

    I really got into natural haircare at that time and finding things that worked without costing a ton of money. Everyone compliments me on my hair now and it is my most loved physical feature about myself, even though I wish it were nappier sometimes, a term black people despise and think I am nuts for because I would like thicker nappier hair.

    Egg/mayo combos are great for the hair. In a haircare forum I'm a part of, they are considered a protein treatment and strengthen the hair. I know there are some commercial protein treatments as well like Awapuhi that I have heard good things about working on fine hair.

    Erin

  7. #17557
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    Thanks Erin

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  8. #17558
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    Thanks for the congrats everyone. DH won't be home right away - I can't post specific travel dates but it's roughly a month and a half to two months before he'll be home home although he'll be in the country before then. But they make them start early. I just love that it's the beginning of the end. And yes, his deployment is over (until/unless he's sent again) and since he's National Guard, he'll be de-activated and eligible for unemployment. Not crazy about losing the paycheck, but having him home more than makes up for it and then this fall/winter likely we'll be moving to GA unless the budget is cut to they point they aren't hiring for the position he's being considered for.

    Myles, Bodhi is adorable. Thanks for sharing the video. Ashley, so is Cash - forgot to say earlier. Everyone's kids are gorgeous (including Cosmo).

    Ashley, I'm continuing with the hair envy, curly or straight.

    Erin, I'm considering trying co-washing. I'm intrigued by it, and I've found that I do better with conditioner than shampoo most of the time anyway. So I'm thinking about washing with shampoo maybe 1-2 times per week then co-washing in between.

    Jennifer, I had to laugh at your comments about your family. I made the decision that politics and family don't mix for me. I'm more conservative than my parents and siblings and I just don't want to get into heated discussions with my loved ones (well, I love heated discussions with DH but that's different). So I never, ever talk politics with family. I was amused last week when my brother's girlfriend told me I would have to hide my liberal views if I moved to Georgia. I wanted to laugh so hard. But honestly, she's probably correct and I would be way more liberal than most there. Which is even funnier.
    Last edited by Gwenn; 02-28-2011 at 06:34 PM.
    Me (39) DH (46) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  9. #17559
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    I always forget something when I post.

    Myles, small talk for me is an acquired skill. I used to be really terrible at it. I guess somewhere along the way in my studies with all these speech pathologists (who tend to be a really talkative crowd, if eccentric) I got in enough practice at it to feel comfortable doing it. Now I only have a problem with it if the other person is struggling on their end - then I'm not sure what to do!
    Me (39) DH (46) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  10. #17560

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    So here's an interesting twist in the whole bday party faux pas.
    The mom works at a food production factory and when her daughter attended my daycare she used to bring me cases of organic frozen pizzas. Apparently they were a poor sell and her boss would let the employees buy them for a quarter a pizza but once he learned of her daughter attending an "organic" daycare he said she could take them. Super nice.
    Well I'm in the kitchen today with two huge milk spots on the chest of my tank top, scrubbing the **** out my wok that dbf burned food onto, kind of sweating and my hair half in a pony tail and half out and not at all in a cute wispy way more of an I ran into a brick wall sort of way. I only mention this because said mom is always hair, nails and make up done. Always. So I felt slightly self concious and totally speechless when suddenly she's at my kitchen door with a case of pizzas! I said I was sorry we couldn't make it to the party and she just blew it off and said "Oh it's fine! Don't worry!"
    Handed me the pizzas and she was off!
    Huh?

  11. #17561

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    And can I just say the idea that we all suck at small talk makes me really want to get us all in room together?

  12. #17562
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    Quote Originally Posted by bridgetwu75 View Post
    And can I just say the idea that we all suck at small talk makes me really want to get us all in room together?
    I would so love to have a secular meet-up. We're all so far apart!
    Me (39) DH (46) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  13. #17563
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    Bridget that's sweet she brought you those pizzas. My kids have had many parties through the years and people don't attend for a whole variety of reasons. I know I never take it personally, and it sounds like she didn't either.

    I'd also love a secular meet-up. I'm willing to travel anywhere!!

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  14. #17564

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    LOL Bridget, I was laughing at your story about being all disheveled when the mom showed up. That always seems to happen to me. (not that I ever really look put together but it seems to be worse when I run into someone I know)
    I think us all getting together would be hilarious! Especially if we brought the kids. I think we should have one with kids and one without.

  15. #17565
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    We should all meet up in London for the 2012 Olympic games!!! Just a thought...lol

  16. #17566
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    Boy don't I wish.

    I have a Mac that has exceeded 20 gig of data in a month (a short month at that). It's in the grad student's lounge. wtf are they downloading?

    ...that's just a rhetorical question. I hate that we have to police the graduate students.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  17. #17567

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    I confess my extended family is getting all heated with each other on facebook regarding the whole Scott Walker bs.
    Here's the thing. I know how I feel about and of course I think I'm right but I am able to also see the opposing side and why they think they are right, It really bothers me when people are so closed minded that they won't try to understand and agree to disagree.

  18. #17568
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    I don't get Walker's side at all, but I'm not going to argue with my family about it. I'm bent at the idea that 'they' felt like it was ok to extend Bush's tax cuts to those making over 250,000/year because those 'poor rich folks' needed the money and it wasn't fair to make them pay, yet 'they' think that it's ok to take away from people making $50,000/year or less. It burns my goad, actually.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  19. #17569

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    Oh you know I agree with you, Chrissy.
    I really think some of my republican relatives are assholes but I know how they think and I know why they think they are right so I'm not wasting my energy trying to argue.

  20. #17570

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    Quote Originally Posted by bridgetwu75 View Post
    Oh you know I agree with you, Chrissy.
    I really think some of my republican relatives are assholes but I know how they think and I know why they think they are right so I'm not wasting my energy trying to argue.
    This is how I usually feel about everyone who disagrees with my political leanings. I don't consider myself a democrat because I have met quite a few of them as well who are VERY closed minded about situations that don't follow their party lines. But usually with both sides, only if someone asks, Iwill say my peace and then not argue anything else because I feel it is a waste.

    Oh and wanted to mention, if we ever met up, I will be the queen of small talk. Even though I usually don't like it, I am VERY good at it. DH and a literature teacher who was also head of our drama department in college both say that I have a natural acting ability and I am great at being "Social Erin" the one who is all bubbly and will talk about most anything. I just pretend I am this professional socialite party woman and I go around the room and introduce myself and talk about all kinds of subjects of all kinds of people. It really tires me out though which is why I don't party often or even go outside of my circle when it comes to social gatherings.

    I bet all of us would get along great though. If not I would pull out Social Erin and you would see that I can talk in much longer paragraphs than I write out in this thread.

    Erin

  21. #17571
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    Quote Originally Posted by bridgetwu75 View Post
    I confess my extended family is getting all heated with each other on facebook regarding the whole Scott Walker bs.
    Here's the thing. I know how I feel about and of course I think I'm right but I am able to also see the opposing side and why they think they are right, It really bothers me when people are so closed minded that they won't try to understand and agree to disagree.
    Yeah that is some BS going on. Seems he came to my town yesterday but nobody really knew about it until he was gone.
    I am really lucky in that both our families....we all hate him and want him gone. Pretty much we all agree that they should have to pay more into retirement and health insurance...I make about what an experienced teacher makes with a masters...and yet I pay for retirement and insurance and I don't get that much vacation. I even sometimes bring work home or stay late or come in early as I am salaried. My DH got his pay cut and for a while had his hours cut in 2009. Now he has some mandatory overtime but they still haven't given them their pay back. That is pretty much the view of our families....can understand why people want them to pay in more since the rest of us pay in.
    The hate and trouble comes in when the unions have agreed to talk and agreed to concessions....and yet that little weasal won't talk unless it's to billionaires. He cares nothing for the working/middle class.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  22. #17572
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    I would be likely pretty quiet at first. Unless we get on the subject of dogs. I can talk tons about my Cosmo.

    I'm sorry for those of you have have conservative relatives. My family is so small and they are liberals and really not even religious at all...some are spiritual but that is it. My favorite uncle that died last year was a hippie back in his day, cared about the environment, cared about the average person a great deal and was gay. My auntie is a lesbian. My daddy was a steward in the United Auto Workers...one of my college scholarships was from the UAW that I won after writing an essay about unions. My sister doesn't care much about politics but I know she is very left when it comes to social issues.
    Dh's family is all working class...grandpa used to be union at Pabst brewery, his unions have been union before.

    And with DH, well I don't think that we would be together if we weren't pretty well alike in our politics...we are both pretty left and I'm probably just a tad bit more left him. The only thing I can think of that we don't agree on is death penalty (I'm against in all cases and he's for in a very limited amount of cases).

    I can't really imagine what it would be like to have heated discussions with family and disgree so much. AT least when I was complaining about DH's uncle, it was more him coming from a very strong Catholic position.

    The one thing DH can't stand is say for example all the Walker supporters....when you ask them why, most can't come up with a good logical reason why they support him. Or if you say, what is that going to do for YOU....they can't support their beliefs.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  23. #17573
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    Even my conservative family thinks that what's going on in WI is bs. The only ones I know I'd have a problem with would be Rich's extended family, which I have nil to do with, and my father's wife's family. I guess they're so conservative, one of her brothers actually poked my dad in the chest and got very confrontational because my dad wore an Obama hat. If I were there and seen that, it would have been on. I don't care who you are, you don't treat my dad like that without getting slapped flat.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  24. #17574

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    If we all had a meetup, I think I'd be a quiet observer at first. DH calls it "data gathering" when I'm quiet. But I'm told I'm cordial and make people feel comfortable right away (I'm pretty attuned to whether people are comfy or not, and tend to be the one to smooth out conversational awkwardness, so my guess is that you wouldn't see any discomfort on my part, even if I might feel it.) But we have an unfair advantage over most strangers. We know and like each other already.

    I've been fortunate enough to meet 9 moms from my DD room all over the country, and they've all been awesome, despite vast differences in parenting styles/politics etc. It's just cool to finally be face-to-face with someone who knows lots of personal things about your marriage and bladder.

    I have lots and lots of conservative in-laws. I think I have a strong grasp on fiscal conservativism, even if I feel I've gotten "over it" myself following my Ayn Rand years, so I can agree to disagree on a lot of things. And coming from my ultra-liberal alma mater, Berkeley, I know how obnoxious extremism can go both ways. So like Erin, I'm an equal opportunity contrarian when the situation calls for it. What I have a difficult time dealing with is when my FIL says stuff like "I won't read that article because it's from a liberal paper." Or my BIL tells his nephew he's silly for wanting to travel because "America is the best country in the world. Why go anywhere else?" when he himself hasn't been out of the country. Stuff like that is what qualifies as willful ignorance. And there's usually little point in telling them they lack the knowledge to make the judgments that they're making. Because they just get mad and defensive.

    I got into it once with that same BIL on FB about the so-called Ground Zero Mosque. Molly briefly hopped into the fray and it was fun. He didn't really present a real defense of his ideas. He just acted all offended and incredulous that I'd ask him to actually clarify why he was offended. Then he'd say things like "if you could only know what I know, but you don't know the whole story about that imam." (Of course, he didn't actually come out and tell me what he "knew" because then he'd have to validate it.) Then he tried to link me to an editorial that expressed his viewpoints for him, but naturally couldn't argue back when I gave him my rebuttal. He said some vaguely offensive things about Muslims, saying "If those people want to be considered Americans...", as though they're automatically "others" by default. And finally he resorted to the old standard "It's mostly gut. You just don't get it." To which I replied "Of course I don't get it because you never adequately explained yourself." We are no longer friends on FB.

    Last Christmas in Boston with the in-laws was awkward, especially because I ended up his Secret Santa.

    Anyway, so yeah, that's the perfect example of why it's not worth it to get into an argument with some folks, ... when they demonstrate that they lack the ability to have a well-reasoned argument. It's one thing to say, "Here's my well-informed POV, and there's your well-informed POV, and we'll disagree along these value lines." It's another thing to say "I disagree with you because you're just wrong and bad, even though I can't articulate why, but maybe you'll concede to my point if I act morally superior to you." I don't have much patience for that.

    Then there's the way my in-laws treat our atheism. I'll have to share that with you later.

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    I confess I bought plane tickets for the girls and I to go to KC, MO for my spring break.

    Right after I bought them I got a call that my BFF's trial will most likely not get postponed again, and I will be getting subpoenaed for March 7-11. My trip is planned for the 10-15.

  26. #17576
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    Quote Originally Posted by The10Eels View Post
    I confess I bought plane tickets for the girls and I to go to KC, MO for my spring break.

    Right after I bought them I got a call that my BFF's trial will most likely not get postponed again, and I will be getting subpoenaed for March 7-11. My trip is planned for the 10-15.
    Does this mean you're coming up? I hate to be happy when you used a sad face, but.... WEEEEE!!!!

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    Quote Originally Posted by The10Eels View Post
    I confess I bought plane tickets for the girls and I to go to KC, MO for my spring break.

    Right after I bought them I got a call that my BFF's trial will most likely not get postponed again, and I will be getting subpoenaed for March 7-11. My trip is planned for the 10-15.
    Oh no! Is there anything you can do?

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  28. #17578
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    Claire asked me tonight if fruit was alive, if it had ever been alive, and when we discussed it a little bit she said she wasn't going to eat it any more because it was something that was living. Instead, she was going to keep eating her hot dogs and stuff like that.

    So then we had a big melt down at the table. And we discussed the circle of life (I thought that might be the best way to put it) and decomposition, and the importance of the smallest bacteria all the way up the food chain. Life feeds on life.

    Whoever said she was destined to become a vegetarian when she freaked out because of the process of extinction may have been on the right track.

    It was interesting how Ronin kept nodding during this whole process and interjecting things like, "Didn't you know that, Claire?" and "Yeah, when you get old you just die--everybody dies, you know." I think he's been paying way more attention to the Discovery Channel wildlife shows than she has been.


  29. #17579
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lydia View Post
    Claire asked me tonight if fruit was alive, if it had ever been alive, and when we discussed it a little bit she said she wasn't going to eat it any more because it was something that was living. Instead, she was going to keep eating her hot dogs and stuff like that.

    So then we had a big melt down at the table. And we discussed the circle of life (I thought that might be the best way to put it) and decomposition, and the importance of the smallest bacteria all the way up the food chain. Life feeds on life.

    Whoever said she was destined to become a vegetarian when she freaked out because of the process of extinction may have been on the right track.

    It was interesting how Ronin kept nodding during this whole process and interjecting things like, "Didn't you know that, Claire?" and "Yeah, when you get old you just die--everybody dies, you know." I think he's been paying way more attention to the Discovery Channel wildlife shows than she has been.
    He's 3???

    All I can say is, I spend WAYYY to much time with communication impaired children. Which your children are clearly not!
    Me (39) DH (46) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

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    I don't think Conner realizes that everybody dies yet. And he's 4 and a half!

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


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