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Thread: Secular Confessions

  1. #17401

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    Oh, and Texas is REALLY warm if you are interested in getting out of the cold! Austin is like Tucson, I think. A blue dot in a sea of red.

    "Any idiot can face a crisis; it is this day-to-day living that wears you out." -Anton Chekhov


  2. #17402
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    omg, that's awful. I'm sad for little you.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  3. #17403
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    I love traveling alone. I traveled around Europe for 3 months by myself when I was 15, and it continued throughout the years. I went to Indonesia for 3 weeks by myself at age 34 when I canceled my wedding but decided to go on the honeymoon anyway. I went to Thailand and Cambodia before that. I meet more people when I travel by myself and even if I can't lean over to someone and share a meaningful or beautiful or frustrating or hilarious moment, I can record it in a journal or in a photo or just treasure it as a unique memory. I love it, and definitely miss it, because I can't see traveling alone any time again in the next 18 years.


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    Quote Originally Posted by missychrissy View Post
    I love AZ so much, I fully intend on retiring and buying a class a motor home to live in. We'll spend 6 months of the year there, and the other half of the year here in Upstate NY.
    Wimp.

    Quote Originally Posted by missychrissy View Post


    When we went, we crossed the state. We started in Phoenix and drove to Tombstone. We stopped on our way at a cave outside to Tuscon (maybe a couple hours? I can't remember). Then we headed back to Phoenix for 1 night and continued on to the Grand Canyon the next day. We stayed on Route 66 in Williams, AZ and Shannon took us through Sedona and Jerome. omg---talk about breathtaking! Any one of those places I could stay a week in. I loved Flagstaff and really think we could live there.

    I really can't say enough about AZ. Easily my favorite place to visit.
    Wow, you really did see the whole state! Sedona - OMG, when you are driving north on I17 and pull around the corner and suddenly see those red rocks - breathtaking is the only word for it. I don't know that I've seen anything more beautiful.

    My sister and brother both live in NY and visit here yearly. They both consider it this amazing vacation spot (so strange to me!)

    Quote Originally Posted by missychrissy View Post
    GA is a warm state...and it's closer than AZ. Just sayin.


    Quote Originally Posted by katycat24 View Post
    My brother and I used to fly by ourselves as very small children. Like I can't believe that we were so young. Divorce. I remember when I was 7 and I flew to visit my Dad and after landing I waited and waited in the gate area until an employee finally noticed I had been sitting there for at least an hour and took me to an office area, gave me a coke and called my dad. I hope she made him feel terrible. He had forgotten I was coming that day or some nonsense. I can't imagine not paying attention to that kind of thing. He used to forget me all the time and I would have to sit and wait until it was past dinner time and he would finally notice that I wasn't there.
    That makes me so sad for you. I'm sorry your dad was such a jerk.

    Quote Originally Posted by katycat24 View Post
    Oh, and Texas is REALLY warm if you are interested in getting out of the cold! Austin is like Tucson, I think. A blue dot in a sea of red.
    Similar, but honestly I believe Austin is more sophisticated than Tucson. But there is a similar vibe.
    Me (39) DH (46) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  5. #17405
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    Now I have wanderlust.

    Conner just asked me, seriously, if I ever rode a dinosaur's back.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  6. #17406

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    I have never traveled by myself, save for a plane ride by myself to my aunt in Cali when I was 16, and a couple bus rides to Washington DC when I was in college to meet up with boyfriends It wasn't far when I was in college in Maryland and it was so fun, so much to do. I also took lots of trips on the T to Boston to meet DH when we were first dating...
    Does a high school trip to Spain count? That was awesome.

    I'm sorry Katycat I don't know how parents forget their children either...I can't forget Josh...even when I drop him off at school I get halfway home before I realize the children's music is still playing

    So yeah we had a great day and then all breaks loose when DH comes home. Josh wants to talk over me, I want to tell DH about the day, Josh needs a snack and his evening tv show, then he doesn't want to go to bed...it's just hectic!

  7. #17407

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    I love traveling alone. I think maybe it's because I love the feeling of being completely removed from all that's familiar. My first alone trip was as a teen to India, though, and I confess I was in over my head. A camel driver ejaculated on me one night while asleep on the desert floor. Does anyone have the same disturbing tale to tell? I didn't think so.

  8. #17408

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    Wait, what?

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    Quote Originally Posted by demigraf View Post
    I love traveling alone. I think maybe it's because I love the feeling of being completely removed from all that's familiar. My first alone trip was as a teen to India, though, and I confess I was in over my head. A camel driver ejaculated on me one night while asleep on the desert floor. Does anyone have the same disturbing tale to tell? I didn't think so.
    I remember a linguistics professor once describing the ability of language to create sentences that have never been spoken before. That is an excellent example of what she was talking about. I'm quite certain no one has created that sentence before you did!
    Me (39) DH (46) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  10. #17410
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    Quote Originally Posted by demigraf View Post
    A camel driver ejaculated on me one night while asleep on the desert floor. Does anyone have the same disturbing tale to tell? I didn't think so.
    I can't help but think that wasn't a serious question! I don't think I've ever met a camel driver. It is disturbing tale, though. Hopefully not as much anymore as the years have passed. I bet it has taken on some weird dreamlike quality. The second time I was traveling around in Europe as a teenager--age 17- I was raped by a stranger after I got off a train. Just before that point, I'd decided to stay in Europe and work helping to restore a villa in Italy instead of going back to the US and going to college. Instead, I kept my plane ticket and went back home to lick my wounds. Interesting how entire futures can spin on random acts.

    ETA: And STILL I love traveling alone. That didn't make me change my mind at all.
    Last edited by 3andMe; 02-22-2011 at 09:54 PM.


  11. #17411

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    Wow - the people with the worst experiences enjoy traveling alone the most. That is unexpected. I'm glad you were able to not let affect you, Lydia, at least in terms of your love of traveling. And demigraph, what on earth did you do?

    "Any idiot can face a crisis; it is this day-to-day living that wears you out." -Anton Chekhov


  12. #17412

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    Oh, Lydia that's so awful. I can't imagine how hard that was to move past in your life. But looking at your considerate hubby and 3 beautiful kids now, it's evident that you didn't allow that experiemce to hold you back.

    katy, I couldn't really do anything, as the guy was there to get me out of the desert alive. I was at least 40km from the nearest village and didn't know my way. I was so young and reckless, that I don't think I really processed what a violation it was until weeks later. When I woke up and found what he'd done, I yelled "What are you doing?!?", threw the piece of clothing that he'd messed up at him angrily, and all he said was "I'm sorry. My body." I was kind of numb and already shocked from other experiences I'd had on that trip, so I guess I responded to him the way I would have if he'd dropped something heavy on my toe, not like he'd done something that would have landed him in jail in the US, not to mention was extremely gross. I was with 2 gay Swiss guys in our camel train, so I slept between them the next couple nights. Then the monsoon hit, and at that point, the 3 of us just decided to leave the guy and the camels, walk the 3 km back to the road and hitchhike back to town. It was not fun for any of us. Wrote my best- IMHO- (and practically only) poem about that experience.

    But no, like Lydia, I'm not down on traveling alone at all after that. My 2nd favorite way to travel is with 2 girlfriends. That way, I can go off on my own without feeling bad about it, but have fun friends to go out with when I feel like. Traveling with 1 friend can get claustrophobic really quickly.

    I love to tell stories about my travels, but feel kind of self-indulgent doing so. My DH thru-hiked the Appalachian Trail, and tells excruciatingly detailed stories...often poorly... about his 2300-mile trek. So I try not to be like him in that sometimes he seems to be holding you captive while he empties his head of every detail. Generally my friends will tell you that my stories come out over time.

    Also, I don't really know of snorkeling spots off PDC, katy, apart from the underwater caverns, which allow for some snorkeling. I remember one spot had a cavern called Dos Ojos and another called The Bat Cave I always thought of the area as better for diving, but I may just not know it that well. Let me check my dive log or Google to refresh my memory and I'll get the name of the spot to you.

  13. #17413

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    Quote Originally Posted by demigraf View Post
    Oh, Lydia that's so awful. I can't imagine how hard that was to move past in your life. But looking at your considerate hubby and 3 beautiful kids now, it's evident that you didn't allow that experiemce to hold you back.

    katy, I couldn't really do anything, as the guy was there to get me out of the desert alive. I was at least 40km from the nearest village and didn't know my way. I was so young and reckless, that I don't think I really processed what a violation it was until weeks later. When I woke up and found what he'd done, I yelled "What are you doing?!?", threw the piece of clothing that he'd messed up at him angrily, and all he said was "I'm sorry. My body." I was kind of numb and already shocked from other experiences I'd had on that trip, so I guess I responded to him the way I would have if he'd dropped something heavy on my toe, not like he'd done something that would have landed him in jail in the US, not to mention was extremely gross. I was with 2 gay Swiss guys in our camel train, so I slept between them the next couple nights. Then the monsoon hit, and at that point, the 3 of us just decided to leave the guy and the camels, walk the 3 km back to the road and hitchhike back to town. It was not fun for any of us. Wrote my best- IMHO- (and practically only) poem about that experience.

    But no, like Lydia, I'm not down on traveling alone at all after that. My 2nd favorite way to travel is with 2 girlfriends. That way, I can go off on my own without feeling bad about it, but have fun friends to go out with when I feel like. Traveling with 1 friend can get claustrophobic really quickly.

    I love to tell stories about my travels, but feel kind of self-indulgent doing so. My DH thru-hiked the Appalachian Trail, and tells excruciatingly detailed stories...often poorly... about his 2300-mile trek. So I try not to be like him in that sometimes he seems to be holding you captive while he empties his head of every detail. Generally my friends will tell you that my stories come out over time.

    Also, I don't really know of snorkeling spots off PDC, katy, apart from the underwater caverns, which allow for some snorkeling. I remember one spot had a cavern called Dos Ojos and another called The Bat Cave I always thought of the area as better for diving, but I may just not know it that well. Let me check my dive log or Google to refresh my memory and I'll get the name of the spot to you.
    I've been reading and wanted to respond, but I'm having trouble lately thinking beyond any kind of surface level, so I usually just read in this room then go somewhere else on APA and post about toddler crafts or how to use time-outs effectively. I think my mind may have turned to mush when I quit working. I want to say I've read this poem but I can't find any record of it, so maybe not. Anyway, I can't imagine how those experiences would've scared me off traveling in general, so I'm amazed you are still the explorers you both are. to you and Lydia both.

    ETA:
    ...In looking through old emails though, I found one where you compared a two month old Bohdi to a pic of Chairman Mao, a back and forth exchange about an idea called "Knork" and accidentally blowing up a duck while locked out of your house. You are one entertaining friend.
    Last edited by AbbeysMom; 02-23-2011 at 02:18 AM.



    lost our bean to Triploidy Sep 2010

  14. #17414
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    Gosh, Myles and Lydia, y'all have had some tales to tell for sure! My 2 adventures out on my own were nothing really to talk about other than I missed my second bus from St. Louis to Arkansas, so I did have to sit outside a McDonald's til 2 in the morning for my parents to pick me up (a 5 hour drive for them.) I sat at a picnic table outside the place with a can of pepper spray in my hand til they arrived...lol

    Looking back at my first trip to England, I was such a country bumpkin back then.

  15. #17415
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    oh my goodness I'm sorry either of you experienced those awful things.

    Bobbie wants to travel the world. I won't tell her these stories (as if it would deter her anyway) but I'm going to worry about her like I've never worried in my life. *gulp* Did either of you tell your parents what happened?

    I found myself in a bad situation with a guy once and it didn't stop me from dating in general. I can see how loving to travel is a separate thing from what those men did. Just because they victimized you while traveling doesn't make traveling bad. It makes those men bad.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  16. #17416

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    Myles and Lydia

  17. #17417
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    Wow. Some of you have gone through some really awful things.

    I'm so the opposite....never had anything bad happen but I do not travel alone. I mean I went to France at 16 and stayed with a family over the summer but it was with school plus I knew the girl as she stayed with my family the summer before. I live in a pretty safe medium sized city....yet I will not go out alone after dark...maybe to the grocery if I REALLY need to go. I am not a good driver in the dark. I will barely go to the mall alone...usually try to wait until my sister or my MIL or my parents are visiting or DH is in the mood to come with me. I do not drive the 90 minutes to Minneapolis to visit my BFF unless DH is coming with because well I am not much for driving over 45 or driving on the interstate.
    I'm a homebody...who likes occasional travel.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  18. #17418

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    I've had some run ins while traveling when I was 18 and 19 but nothing really horrible. One guy pulled out his penis and was rubbing my leg way to close to my favorite girl parts and I had to hit him on a plane once, but that was it.

    I'm very cautious and untrusting though, more so when I was younger. I used to always expect horrible things to happen to me, it was scary and exciting at the same time. So I rarely let people get close to me who I don't know when I'm travelling. I stay in my own little world and watch every with caution. I wish I have gone somewhere out of the ordinary like Indonesia or even ride on a camel. I have only been to Canada and different states in the Midwest. Bus tickets were cheap so I would take trips to Detroit or Chicago or Cleveland or Cinncinnati (my favorite city in OH) for a couple days just to do something when I was bored. Tickets were usually $30 one way. I always met interesting people on the busses and at museums I went to.

    I like being by myself a lot though as I don't have the feeling that I have to be entertaining or social. I am entertaining or social a lot on the outside and people would never believe that I feel I am an introvert. I don't like to talk much and like to really observe and think about things like history or art or music or even just the way someone looks (like fashion or how someone's eye is shaped) and DH knows I am like that. He also knows he is a party animal and vacation to him means dancing and drinking and loud music, to me that is work. We often travel alone but try to take a family vacation every year as well.

    I confess that I still think about a man I met on a bus when I was 19 on my way to Detroit. He confessed to me he was a drug addict. He was very dark skinned with very light green, hazel colored eyes and he reminded me of a black cat. I talked to him for a short time and since then I still think of him and wonder how his life turned out. He was lamenting about a woman he had been with years and years ago. He was probably about 50 though maybe younger since drugs make people look more aged. It amazes me sometimes that I still think of people like him that I've met only for brief periods. I feel it brings me closer to understanding humanity in a way. This is the main reason why I like going places myself. I would never have time for such contemplation about strangers with DH who would butt in on a lot of conversations I have with people. I'm sure he would have told that drug addict to stop talking to me. The man was asking me for money and DH hates it when men ask me for money and will proceed to lecture them about work, so it would have ruined the whole trip in my mind.

    Erin
    Last edited by Ky'sMom; 02-23-2011 at 10:36 AM.

  19. #17419

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    I have never traveled alone nor lived alone. Most of both have been with my best girlfriend. The one time I broached the subject of living alone with my friend, she started to cry so that put the kabosh on it. It wasn't a huge hardship for me because I really love her and loved living with her. I just wanted the experience of living alone.
    A have had a few really bad things happen to me that hardly anyone knows about but they were a direct result of my own reckless behavior.

  20. #17420
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ky'sMom View Post
    I like being by myself a lot though as I don't have the feeling that I have to be entertaining or social. I am entertaining or social a lot on the outside and people would never believe that I feel I am an introvert. I don't like to talk much and like to really observe and think about things like history or art or music or even just the way someone looks (like fashion or how someone's eye is shaped) and DH knows I am like that. He also knows he is a party animal and vacation to him means dancing and drinking and loud music, to me that is work. We often travel alone but try to take a family vacation every year as well.

    Erin
    I can do either one and have a good time. I like to go out and dance and party, but I also like to be by myself and just observe people and things around me. I don't get bored easy. I imagine if we traveled together, we could sit in companionable silence and have an excellent time!

    One of my pet peeves is talking in the car. It's not a horrible irritant for me, but if I had my druthers I'd drive silently for hours. I don't need to chatter incessantly...something I feel my children do often.

    My horrible experience happened in my own home when I lived alone. Well, I lived with Bobbie and Jessica. I was single then. I was too trusting. From that experience, everyone is a 'threat' to me until proven otherwise.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  21. #17421

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    I enjoy silence too, but DH thinks the silences we have are awkward. We're silent together most of the time, and I'm comfortable with that, but he's not. He also needs noise in the car. He has to have a podcast going or he asks me to talk to him or read to him.

  22. #17422

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    I cannot stand noise in the car either. It is very distracting for me. Sometimes I feel horrible because I do make the kids stay quiet in the car. I also now enjoy the back row of my minivan I bought last year because when Ky's friends come over and we go places they can do their endless talks further away from me.

    When we go on roadtrips, I purposefully drive at night so that I don't have to endure the noise.

    Oh, and I do enjoy a good party and socializing most of the time, but my DH is one of those people who has to be the first to arrive and the last to leave. Sometimes after 3am and I get bored of parties after a few hours. I sometimes think this is because I don't drink much. You know how some people just get livelier when they drink and it makes them more social...I am already social in social situations, plus I'd probably fall asleep if I drank at parties since alcohol makes me very drowsy...and horny and there is nothing worse than a horny, yet sleepy drunk lady LOL.

    Erin

  23. #17423

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    I have been thinking about horrible things happening to people in their lives. The majority of horrible experiences I have had involve growing up, my childhood of all things. When I turned 18 I was relieved because I felt that nothing else in the whole rest of my life could be more horrible than what I had already been through. I still believe that to a point since I feel if one of my children had a horrible tragedy happen to them, then it would be much more horrible for me, but in my own experiences and incidents, I can't imagine anything worst than some of the abuse I suffered as a child. And really compared to stories I read about other abused children, mine aren't that bad, but going through it was very difficult, the most difficult was making sense of what had happened when I was a teenager in regards to the sexual abuse I suffered when I was between 8 and 12 years old. So I see all of the crazy dealings I had after 18 as not being as horrible as all that. It is also the reason I am so untrusting of people and cautious about really everyone. My stepfather who abused me was a very nice, funny, all around great guy around everyone and I thought of him as a monster in disguise. I still think of all people in a similar way, you never know who someone is or what they will do and just like when I went places by myself that thought is both exciting and scary to me.

    Erin

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    Sorry, off-topic, ladies, but:
    I'm curious about how healthcare works in the US? My parents never had insurance, so I never went to the doctor in the US at all and only ever started seeing a doctor regularly when I moved to the UK when I was 21.

    I see people saying that they've gone to the ER for things like chest infections and flu...so, if you have insurance, wouldn't you just go see your normal doctor for that? That's how it works here...the ER is just for accidents and emergencies...if I'm sick, I'll call the doctor's office and they'll schedule me an appointment for that day. Just curious!

  25. #17425
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    Quote Originally Posted by AmeriBrit View Post
    Sorry, off-topic, ladies, but:
    I'm curious about how healthcare works in the US? My parents never had insurance, so I never went to the doctor in the US at all and only ever started seeing a doctor regularly when I moved to the UK when I was 21.

    I see people saying that they've gone to the ER for things like chest infections and flu...so, if you have insurance, wouldn't you just go see your normal doctor for that? That's how it works here...the ER is just for accidents and emergencies...if I'm sick, I'll call the doctor's office and they'll schedule me an appointment for that day. Just curious!
    If you have insurance, that is how it works too. Unless it is at night and you are really sick. I once when to an ER when I was 10 with really awful strep because it was a weekend.
    If you don't have insurance, people often go the ER because you will at least get seen and often the hospital has to write off that visit since there is no way they will get paid (than they charge everyone else more to help recoup costs). If you have no insurance and no way to pay....a regular family doc doesn't HAVE to see or treat you. We are now starting to see more walk in clinics that can treat minor things for older kids/adults that say charge 40-50 per appt.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  26. #17426

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    It is the same if you have insurance. But some things they will only do in the ER. A couple years ago Ky fell at the park and busted his chin and needed stitches. I called are pedi first since some pedi's do stitches, they don't since it is a small office so we had to go to the ER and had to pay an ER co-pay which is $100 versus a regular doctor co-pay of $15, which I think is some crap since we couldn't go to our regular doctor.

    Anytime we go to the doctor we have to pay a co-pay. Usually it is $15 for the kids to see the pedi for DH and I to see our doctor it is the same. If we go to a specialist (ob/gyn is considered a specialist with our plan now, it didn't used to be) we have to pay $20. For any minor surgery we have to pay $100 and for perscriptions the maximum we pay is $20 per Rx, which can add up if you get more than one. Once for Ky's chalazion stye I had to pay $60 in one day, $20 for a pedi opthamologist and $40 for 2 Rxs.

    We have a POS plan, which is a managed plan similar to an HMO where the insurance company makes contracts to pay certain service providers a certain amount for certain services. We are limited in what doctors we can see as they have to agree to participate in this plan and contract. If we go to someone else, they are considered "Out of Network" and we have to pay 20% of whatever the total cost of that providers charges for medical services. We are actually lucky in that regard being that it is not all that costly to go to an out of network doctor as a lot of people who I know with a PPO always have to pay 20% of their cost, even if they go to an "In Network" doctor. They also have to pay deductibles, meaning that their plan says they have to pay a certain amount out of their own pocket before the insurance company will pay for anything. A friend of mine has to pay a $5000 family deductible before their insurance will pay for anything. She is PG now and will have a c-section and will also have to pay 20% of the cost for the c-section after the $5000 deductible is paid.

    If all that was confusing, it's because insurance is pretty confusing.

    Erin

  27. #17427
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    OK, thanks, guys, that makes sense (I think!) The plus side to government run healthcare is not worrying about the bills. There are lots of negatives, as well, but me being the lazy person I am, love to not have any paperwork to deal with.

  28. #17428
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ky'sMom View Post
    ...there is nothing worse than a horny, yet sleepy drunk lady LOL.

    Erin


    Quote Originally Posted by Ky'sMom View Post
    I have been thinking about horrible things happening to people in their lives. The majority of horrible experiences I have had involve growing up, my childhood of all things. When I turned 18 I was relieved because I felt that nothing else in the whole rest of my life could be more horrible than what I had already been through. I still believe that to a point since I feel if one of my children had a horrible tragedy happen to them, then it would be much more horrible for me, but in my own experiences and incidents, I can't imagine anything worst than some of the abuse I suffered as a child. And really compared to stories I read about other abused children, mine aren't that bad, but going through it was very difficult, the most difficult was making sense of what had happened when I was a teenager in regards to the sexual abuse I suffered when I was between 8 and 12 years old. So I see all of the crazy dealings I had after 18 as not being as horrible as all that. It is also the reason I am so untrusting of people and cautious about really everyone. My stepfather who abused me was a very nice, funny, all around great guy around everyone and I thought of him as a monster in disguise. I still think of all people in a similar way, you never know who someone is or what they will do and just like when I went places by myself that thought is both exciting and scary to me.

    Erin
    Your stepfather is the worst kind...talk about ultimate betrayal. I think it's worse if the abuse is inflicted by someone that everyone else in the family adores.

    Quote Originally Posted by AmeriBrit View Post
    Sorry, off-topic, ladies, but:
    I'm curious about how healthcare works in the US? My parents never had insurance, so I never went to the doctor in the US at all and only ever started seeing a doctor regularly when I moved to the UK when I was 21.

    I see people saying that they've gone to the ER for things like chest infections and flu...so, if you have insurance, wouldn't you just go see your normal doctor for that? That's how it works here...the ER is just for accidents and emergencies...if I'm sick, I'll call the doctor's office and they'll schedule me an appointment for that day. Just curious!
    Most people that have insurance won't go to the ER unless it's after hours or their dr refers them...or, unless it's an emergency. Some communities have urgent care centers, but many do not. If their dr is filled for a few days, people may opt to utilize the ER instead.

    Quote Originally Posted by Cosmosmom View Post
    If you have insurance, that is how it works too. Unless it is at night and you are really sick. I once when to an ER when I was 10 with really awful strep because it was a weekend.
    If you don't have insurance, people often go the ER because you will at least get seen and often the hospital has to write off that visit since there is no way they will get paid (than they charge everyone else more to help recoup costs). If you have no insurance and no way to pay....a regular family doc doesn't HAVE to see or treat you. We are now starting to see more walk in clinics that can treat minor things for older kids/adults that say charge 40-50 per appt.
    I've known people that were even turned away from ER after the nurse performed a triage and it was felt the patient without money or insurance wasn't really experiencing an emergency. It is an absolute myth that hospitals cannot deny to treat people...they can, and they do. They can't deny you if you're seriously at risk of death or loss of limb, but not if it's something they feel a general physician can treat the next day. Whether you have money or not isn't a concern of theirs.

    Quote Originally Posted by AmeriBrit View Post
    OK, thanks, guys, that makes sense (I think!) The plus side to government run healthcare is not worrying about the bills. There are lots of negatives, as well, but me being the lazy person I am, love to not have any paperwork to deal with.
    You get an appointment the day you make a call? Please scream that from the rooftops 'cause many here believe no one is seen in less than 6 weeks in countries with nationalized health care.

    I'd rather suffer some negatives than face dealing with mountains of unexpected bills, on top of the nearly $5,000/year I pay just for the privilege of having insurance. We're one medical disaster away from being destroyed and there's not a thing we can do about that.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  29. #17429
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    I am also sorry to hear of the negative experiences so many of you have had, but I have to say I am a little in awe of all of you and how you have not only recovered but lived your lives to the fullest. This is a group of such strong, amazing, interesting women and I actually feel a little lucky to know you all. There, I've said it.

    I am really frustrated right now. I've been feeding my cat canned food to get her to eat more since she got sick. She's eating her dry food again but she asks for the canned salmon (meows at me and when I bring it to her her whole face perks up when she recognizes the can) so because she is sick and despite that so sweet and easy to care for I will give her anything she wants. The dogs get dry food, rawhide chews 2x per day, and table scraps of whatever I am eating. Today is the third day that I have caught Nero climbing on top of the counter to eat the cat's food WHILE SHE WAS EATING IT. Yesterday and the day before I caught him red handed (pawed), swatted him, and put him outside on the porch where he whined continuously until I let him in. Today I shut the bathroom door so he couldn't get to her but it doesn't close properly (old house/door) and he OPENED THE DOOR and again stole her food while she was eating it. I put him back out and he's crying like a baby. He is so pushy I can't tolerate him. I've actually considered finding him a new home but DH would never forgive me. I don't know what to do.
    Me (39) DH (46) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  30. #17430
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    Quote Originally Posted by missychrissy View Post



    I've known people that were even turned away from ER after the nurse performed a triage and it was felt the patient without money or insurance wasn't really experiencing an emergency. It is an absolute myth that hospitals cannot deny to treat people...they can, and they do. They can't deny you if you're seriously at risk of death or loss of limb, but not if it's something they feel a general physician can treat the next day. Whether you have money or not isn't a concern of theirs.



    .
    Oh yeah that was what I was talking about....like really serious they treat you but once you aren't dying, forget you. I know one person who was basically told...well you have cervical and if you had insurance we would be doing this but since you don't, this is about all we can do. That actually started a research project I was working on....about quality of care from the uninsured patient perspective.
    I also know another person who was in a coma and family was told to say goodbye. She unexpectedly woke up and THAT day they kicked her out as she wasn't dying...didn't even wait for someone to drive and pick her up before she was in the lobby. If she had insurance, you can bet that she would have been kept at least one night for observation.

    I just wish that everyone on the right realized just how close they were...maybe they have decent insurance today but most of us are just one big medical disaster from losing it all.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

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