Josh is four right? Been a while since I have been around four year olds but when I was (usually 50 hours a week or more...though one I had so much she had a bed in my room), I used the corner for time outs. Four yrs old got four minutes. I gave warnings and if they didn't listen, time out in the corner. I don't personally like sending to the room....they have too much fun stuff in their rooms. One never went to time out, one had to twice I think, and the other was a bit more stubborn had to go a little more often....
Dh asked me how do you make them stay....I said I don't know, I just told them to go into time out and stay until the timer was off and they did. Did not have to yell, just used a firm tone and gave "the look" that they knew I meant business. If they turned around or tried to leave, they were directed back into time out. My mom always told me that if you expect certain behavior from a kid, you are more likely to get it (though not always of course!).
that said, I thought my bff's kid was a brat when she was four. She was over for the holidays and is 7 now and was very nice and polite and social and listened pretty well...especially being the only child and it's not like I have a whole room of toys.
So I guess Chrissy is right, it does eventually get better.