Secular Confessions

[Ky'sMom]

Strippers and a poker game. Too bad you're not having twins.

Had to LOL at that!!!

But I agree Sierra and Sahara are way too close to Savana, you'd be tongue tying all the time.

I would try to get him to like Margaret or Margo. That is strange that he would veto naming a daughter after your mother IMO. Even if he thinks it's old fashioned or something. I have a nephew named after my dad, his name is Roscoe, which is WAY old fashioned and strange IMO. We call him Rocky. I just see Roscoe as an old man's name and so did my brother but my dad was going through some health problems before Rocky was born and my brother thought he was going to die so he named his last son after our father. He even broke his "A" tradition. His other 3 kids all have names that start with A like him.

Erin

[3andMe]

Strippers and a poker game. Too bad you're not having twins.

Hey Bridget, how old are you? Not to be rude, but I'm wondering if I'm the only old Mama here. I just turned 39

Remember me? I turned 40 last February. When I was six months pregnant.

One of my patients told me today that turning 40 was really hard, because it's the whole shock of middle age, but 50 is a blast because you're used to it by then and you can just enjoy it.

I really like the names Margaret and Margo/Margot. Two of the best people I have known have been Megs.

[Bridget]

Had to LOL at that!!!

But I agree Sierra and Sahara are way too close to Savana, you'd be tongue tying all the time.

I would try to get him to like Margaret or Margo. That is strange that he would veto naming a daughter after your mother IMO. Even if he thinks it's old fashioned or something. I have a nephew named after my dad, his name is Roscoe, which is WAY old fashioned and strange IMO. We call him Rocky. I just see Roscoe as an old man's name and so did my brother but my dad was going through some health problems before Rocky was born and my brother thought he was going to die so he named his last son after our father. He even broke his "A" tradition. His other 3 kids all have names that start with A like him.

Erin

I think it's strange too. I just feel like it makes sense. I found out I was pregnant just 2 weeks before she died. I'm due late Jan and her birthday is Feb 4.
But I've brought it up several times and he's not budging. He says middle name would be fine but we never use middle names around here. My kids don't even know theirs. Is that weird?

I need to get off my arse and try making this waffle batter for the morning. I just got an awesome old school cast iron waffle maker.

[Bridget]

Remember me? I turned 40 last February. When I was six months pregnant.

One of my patients told me today that turning 40 was really hard, because it's the whole shock of middle age, but 50 is a blast because you're used to it by then and you can just enjoy it.

I really like the names Margaret and Margo/Margot. Two of the best people I have known have been Megs.

I was going to mention you but didn't want to call you out that like that.
How are you feeling, Lydia?

[missychrissy]

Ah. So I AM old.

We'll be 35 in just over a month. I don't think 4 years quantifies you as 'older' than us. I think of you in the same age group as me anyway.

And I'm with Bridget...I really don't feel older than 20. I'm just a heckuva lot smarter and have more patience. Plus I'm more liberal. All improvements, imo.

[stash]

Of cooooouuurse I remember you, Lydia. I guess I just forgot you were so old. :p Did anyone give you any guff for being AMA when you were pregnant? I'd completely forgotten about it until today. I guess I thought once we'd passed the genetic roulette hurdle, that was it.

As for age in general, I couldn't care less. Dh had a moment about turning 40, but me? Whatever.

[girlwonder]

I'm 41.

I like Margaret and variations. Margo, Marjo, Greta, Marguerite, Margarita, Margita. I hope you get to name her after your mom (if it is a her)

[3andMe]

Improved (I think the meds are helping already) but not back to my normal self yet. I just wrote out two long paragraphs of examples and then realized how completely not like me I sounded, but I think I'm a little panicky about dh leaving for three weeks.

Wish me luck!

The good news is, I'm not huddled under the covers crying, Baby S. isn't crying either, I have 24 hours until dh leaves, and I think I'll probably survive until he gets back. And I met a cool 3-year-old girl and her sperm donor (he didn't want to be called Daddy, and I'm intrigued to find out more about the family dynamics) at the park the other day and we all got invited to her birthday party this weekend. So we have things to look forward to. Thanks for asking, Bridget. And last but not least, I'm only two pounds above my pre-pregnancy weight, and I think it's all in my vagina.

[3andMe]

Of cooooouuurse I remember you, Lydia. I guess I just forgot you were so old. :p Did anyone give you any guff for being AMA when you were pregnant? I'd completely forgotten about it until today. I guess I thought once we'd passed the genetic roulette hurdle, that was it.

They were very nice about NOT using the term ADVANCED maternal age around me. They figured I knew how old I was, since all of my pregnancies have been AMA. I've had genetic screenings offered at all of my pregnancies, and my MDs have been very good about working with me, letting me know what the risks and benefits of different options and screenings are without hitting me over the head with the age factor per se. My primary OB is a little overly cautious, but it's not because of my age but because of my personal history and because he's had some bad outcomes (me, and some other patients, and I think he's superstitious).

[Gwenn]

And last but not least, I'm only two pounds above my pre-pregnancy weight, and I think it's all in my vagina.

Thanks for the giggle! And I'm glad you're feeling improved. Hopefully you'll be back to your old self soon.

Bridget, the name Margo rocks. It's classic and modern at the same time, and it makes so much sense with the timing. Sierra/Sahara not only sound like stripper names but would leave me wondering why you didn't name Kai Jungle or Tundra or something. I'm not big on themes, personally.

I'm almost 37, although not a mama. Definitely concerned about the difficulties it will or may have already caused with conception and pregnancy but I can't rewind the clock. I want to have children so I'll take the risk.

My cousin is turning 50 and posted on my facebook about it. She's having a Zumba dance party for her birthday. I posted that it sounds like 50 was much more fun than 37. She said it definitely was for her! I'll probably be home sulking, then going to an autism conference the next day. Fun times.

[Cosmosmom]

Bridget couldn't you take this list http://www.ssa.gov/cgi-bin/popularnames.cgi with the top 1000 names and each of you write down any names you could like or at least live with. and than compare to see if there is anything on at all the same on your lists.
that is basically what we did and ended up with Theodore Wilson for a boy, a second boy is probably Harrison Christopher (when I did clomid I thought for sure we would get twins since I was at a higher risk than the average woman for twins with clomid).

For a girl we like Katherine Cleo (probably call her Kasey) and Penelope Rose.

another name for Margaret would be Megan.


As for age...not a mama either and never thought I would make it to 32 without a baby that doesn't have a tail. I turned 32 on Sunday. And proceeded to fight with DH big time the next day....I was annoyed that he basically ignored me all weekend playing his stupid online star fleet game...he thought it was fine since we were with my family and I was visiting with them. Than we got back home and had a huge fight about decorating and where to place our new paintings. I'm talking yelling, crying, accusing.... I know some of it was me annoyed from the weekend, some of it was hormones on my part, and some of it was turning 32 and still no baby (even though I know if he could change it he would).

Chrissy, my parents were pretty liberal and cool. I mean I had a car at 16 and no curfew, they didn't really control what I did or who I was with or what I read or thought.....I even got a boy/girl overnight party for new years eve at 16 (they checked with other parents first and they were home). But I still had to have my door open for the longest time. Even with DH, it wasn't until we were engaged that he could sleep over in my room with the door closed and I was in my 20's and even at that he had to sleep on the floor. I was mostly at college at that point and they knew were together all the time in my private dorm room except when we were in class or working (though he did have to leave by midnight weeknights and 2am weekends....it was still a Catholic college after all ). So yeah at 17 bedroom door open is pretty darn reasonable!

[Gwenn]

As for age...not a mama either and never thought I would make it to 32 without a baby that doesn't have a tail. I turned 32 on Sunday. And proceeded to fight with DH big time the next day....I was annoyed that he basically ignored me all weekend playing his stupid online star fleet game...he thought it was fine since we were with my family and I was visiting with them. Than we got back home and had a huge fight about decorating and where to place our new paintings. I'm talking yelling, crying, accusing.... I know some of it was me annoyed from the weekend, some of it was hormones on my part, and some of it was turning 32 and still no baby (even though I know if he could change it he would).

Yeah ... I hear you. At least you haven't hit that magic age of 35 yet. I'll be 37 day after tomorrow and won't even be able to TTC again until May at the earliest. But I can definitely relate.

[The10Eels]

Bridget, the name Margo rocks. It's classic and modern at the same time, and it makes so much sense with the timing. Sierra/Sahara not only sound like stripper names but would leave me wondering why you didn't name Kai Jungle or Tundra or something. I'm not big on themes, personally.

I agree with this.. I too think Margo is AWESOME!!

I thought Charlene was a little old fashioned, but loved Charlie, so I agreed... and "Charlie" totally fits her!!

I confess in the past two days I have applied for a phlebotomist position and two property manager type positions (both come with super cheap rent on an apartment).
I am anxious to hear back on any of them...
though the one is in the next town over... so I'd have to get up, get the girls ready, drive them to grandma's (about 15 miles) drive back for work... then later drive back, pick the girls up and then drive the 15 miles back home.... so it would be 60 miles of driving per day, for a job that would be like 150 feet from my house.... (ok, so a little more than that...., but not much)

[daylilies]

I know you guys said a lot since I read this thread but the one thing I could not get past is Bridget's boyfriend being 45. The way you describe him sounds like he's in his mid 20's.

[Bridget]

I know you guys said a lot since I read this thread but the one thing I could not get past is Bridget's boyfriend being 45. The way you describe him sounds like he's in his mid 20's.

People in real life never believe it. Ever. He looks young too.

[missychrissy]

And last but not least, I'm only two pounds above my pre-pregnancy weight, and I think it's all in my vagina.

I'm glad you're starting to feel better and I hope your dh's time away is seamless for you.

...I'd have to get up, get the girls ready, drive them to grandma's (about 15 miles) drive back for work... then later drive back, pick the girls up and then drive the 15 miles back home.... so it would be 60 miles of driving per day, for a job that would be like 150 feet from my house.... (ok, so a little more than that...., but not much)

Oh, that sounds like a lot of running. I know people drive further than that regularly, but it would stink since you live so close. They wouldn't be able to pick the girls up? Or drop them off in the afternoon? Save you 1 trip at least. (?).

I know you guys said a lot since I read this thread but the one thing I could not get past is Bridget's boyfriend being 45. The way you describe him sounds like he's in his mid 20's.

ita

[intactivstmom]

Just out of curiosity, is that why your username is Shanna(h)? So it's not exactly her name? That's messed up that your dad named you after his mistress. Then again Josh's name comes from a couple celebrities I have crushes on (DH doesn't realize this though), so who am I to talk?

Kind of. Her name was AnnaMarie, and I'm Shanna Marie. I added the H unofficially in high school, but still had to turn in papers without the H at the end. Eventually my friends noticed and just started putting the extra H in parenthesis since they never knew which was right. Ever since then it's just stuck.

Bridget couldn't you take this list http://www.ssa.gov/cgi-bin/popularnames.cgi with the top 1000 names and each of you write down any names you could like or at least live with. and than compare to see if there is anything on at all the same on your lists.
that is basically what we did and ended up with Theodore Wilson for a boy, a second boy is probably Harrison Christopher (when I did clomid I thought for sure we would get twins since I was at a higher risk than the average woman for twins with clomid).

Dh and I did that, and still could not come up with one name we really liked. We only had about 30 each we could stand, but usually once we said them out loud one or two times we hated them.

Maybe I'm being naughty right now, but I would forget your dbf, and name the baby YOU carried for 9 months after your Mom. Usually I'm not one to advocate usurping you s/o, but I think Margo is such a cute name, and it has such a special meaning and significance too.

I know you guys said a lot since I read this thread but the one thing I could not get past is Bridget's boyfriend being 45. The way you describe him sounds like he's in his mid 20's.

Me too!

Oh, and it looks like I'm the baby of the group. I'm 22. But I've noticed I tend to connect a little more with the older moms. I love stalking the 35yrs+ mom room, and a lot of moms in my dd room that I feel a little closer too are all older too.

[missychrissy]

I agree, I think you should name your baby whatever you want Bridget. You're probably the only person I'd ever encourage to do that.

I dropped my cell phone in the toilet at work. yay.

[demigraf]

I like the name Margo/Margot, although it reminds me of these two yoga teacher sisters I knew named Margeaux and Rainbeau who were always trying to sell these stinky essential oils after class.

[stash]

I just found out my midwife (the first one, I have a great backup) is at a conference in Seattle 9/29-10-1. I can't go into labor then.

[daylilies]

No labor dust for you, then!

[girlwonder]

I just ate two homemade chocolate covered strawberry waffles. yum. I really enjoyed those waffles.

[Gwenn]

That. Sounds. Awesome. Yum.

I confess I had a huge pet peeve happen today. Had a meeting with a student's family and they brought along a consultant from a county agency that provides services to special needs kids. I introduced myself as the speech pathologist. Partway through the meeting, while the teacher was explaining the reading goals to the parents, the county lady turned to the school psychologist and asked, "What are you going to do to make her talk?"

Sooo many things that irritate me about that ... primarily that she asked the psych and not the speech pathologist! And I don't "make her talk." I help her learn to communicate, whether or not she is ever capable of learning to talk. And chances are good that she never will since she's 10 and is missing a good chunk of her frontal cortex. And finally, we hadn't even gotten to the communication section yet.

On an unrelated note, advice appreciated.

[intactivstmom]

My ob/gyn said the only thing in the way of me getting a vbac would be mal-presentation of the baby, a common problem with uterine malformations. Usually turning techniques don't work, since the baby doesn't have room to move.
Then she said with a vbac our hospital requires the doctor to be with their patient the ENTIRE time they are in labor for a vabc. So I took that to mean that if I really want a vbac that baby needs to come fast.
I'm not sure what that means for me if I'm in the hospital trying to stop labor. I'm guessing my ob is not going to move into my hospital room with me for a few days or weeks. There must be a difference between being in labor and having a baby, and being in labor trying to stop labor. I'll have to ask her about that as we get closer to viability. Since it is hospital policy I can't really do anything about it.

[AmeriBrit]

Good luck, Shannah, with your VBAC. I recently had one; my first was breech and delivered by c/s. I wanted an unmedicated VBAC but that didn't happen when they strapped me to the monitors. Ended up with an epidural and ventouse delivery, but I did get my VBAC, which was a lot better to me than having another c/s.

[missychrissy]

They told me an obgyn would have to be there the entire time I labored with Conner too. I was like, "so?" Let them be there. I was sure I wouldn't get talked into a c-section no matter how long it took, and I wasn't going to feel sorry for the obgyn if he/she got bored.

The way mine played out was the nurse kept insisting I wasn't in real labor. My midwife happened to call when I was having a bad contraction and heard me howling/yelling, and she knew from my voice that it was real or something was wrong so she went ahead and called the obgyn and started on her way herself. The OB lived closer, and when he arrived I was ready to deliver. I actually did deliver Conner before signing the paperwork to be admitted.

Stupid nurse. I still hate her. You cannot fathom what it does to a laboring woman when a 'professional' keeps insisting you're not really in labor. I started yelling and howling because I was losing it. I needed someone there, like my midwife, to talk to me and help me focus. That's another area where my dh totally lost brownie points. He was busy having his own melt-down and couldn't help me.

But I did vbac, so that's all that counts.

[midgeend]

My ob/gyn said the only thing in the way of me getting a vbac would be mal-presentation of the baby, a common problem with uterine malformations. Usually turning techniques don't work, since the baby doesn't have room to move.
Then she said with a vbac our hospital requires the doctor to be with their patient the ENTIRE time they are in labor for a vabc. So I took that to mean that if I really want a vbac that baby needs to come fast.
I'm not sure what that means for me if I'm in the hospital trying to stop labor. I'm guessing my ob is not going to move into my hospital room with me for a few days or weeks. There must be a difference between being in labor and having a baby, and being in labor trying to stop labor. I'll have to ask her about that as we get closer to viability. Since it is hospital policy I can't really do anything about it.

Go look for a really good doula, and see about doing a lot of your laboring at home!

[stash]

I third the "get a good doula" and YAY congrats on being cleared to try for a vbac! I wonder if your OB has a midwife in his practice? Sometimes (not always) they're more willing to sit with a patient during their "whole labor."

[missychrissy]

I agree with the others, try to get a good midwife and/or doula. She can help you in so many ways, and especially advocate on your behalf when things get going.

[missychrissy]

In other news...

I found out my precious angels (Bobbie and Jessica) have experimented with marijuana. I'm not as upset as I imagined I would be. As much as I believe kids will go through certain things, I was still incredulous because they've both been so adamant about not doing drugs. I realize it's not something that you run home and tell mom and dad about, but at the same time I cannot believe they kept it from me. We talk about everything. Or so I thought.

They are good girls, and I hope no one here thinks less of them. Bobbie did it a number of times, Jess tried it once and didn't like it. Bobbie is an advocate to make it legal...I told her until it's legal she better stay away from it.