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Thread: Secular Confessions

  1. #10651
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    Quote Originally Posted by daylilies View Post
    LOL...Josh does that with food too. He wants to have raw meat, or frozen food, or uncooked oatmeal...anything that doesn't make sense!

    I can't tell you it ends soon, but you do kind of get used to it, and come up with clever ways to get around the tantrum some of the time.
    Thanks Kate. It's not like tantrums are a new thing, but right now it's one after the other with barely a breather in between. I feel so helpless.


  2. #10652

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    LOL No sadly they are not hot. It's ok though, they can cook a good burger!

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    There was a 5 guys less than a mile from my house in KC, and I never ate there...

    Lydia - If the meat yesterday was horse, I kinda doubt it was bought commercially or by special order. There are TONS of wild horses here, and I can totally imagine them going out and slaughtering one themselves...

    We had a place in Alaska that was shut down because it was discovered that they were capturing stray cats, and cooking/serving them... and my homestay family in Japan offered me dog. (Which I didn't eat btw) This was the day after they served up the goldfish that had been in the fish tank in the hallway.

  4. #10654

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    I know Sarah. It's tough. All I can tell you is, pick your battles! Or you'll be battling all day.

    Speaking of battles, the other day I told Josh to go up and pick out a shirt. It was hot out, and he came out with a sweatshirt on. He was so proud that he picked it out and put it on all by himself, but DH was afraid we'd look like bad parents if we took him out in a sweatshirt in 70 degree weather. He managed to coax Josh into a T shirt but I thought it would have been better to let him stay in it and if he got hot he'd learn not to pick out a sweatshirt when it's hot out. (we did tell him he would be hot in it and he still wanted to wear it) What do you guys think of situations like that?

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    oh.. and I LOVE me some buffalo, and moose, and elk.....

  6. #10656
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    Quote Originally Posted by MammaMia View Post



    Why not be a vegetarian then?


    Because I like chicken and I like beef too much. I just feel bad eating it but not quite bad enough. I don't really know how to do things vegetarian style like with beans and soy. I don't like eggs. and with the gastric bypass I have to be careful to get in my protein (because food bypasses the first 5 ft of upper intestine, I have to be careful for absorption issues). I do LOVE cheese but have to be careful with milk (surgery left me somewhat lactose intolerant)....and I like nuts.

    so yeah I like the idea in theory and wish I could do it but I just don't think that I could realistically.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  7. #10657
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    Quote Originally Posted by daylilies View Post
    LOL No sadly they are not hot. It's ok though, they can cook a good burger!
    That's way better! Dammit, now I want a burger.

    Quote Originally Posted by atenielle View Post
    There was a 5 guys less than a mile from my house in KC, and I never ate there...

    Lydia - If the meat yesterday was horse, I kinda doubt it was bought commercially or by special order. There are TONS of wild horses here, and I can totally imagine them going out and slaughtering one themselves...

    We had a place in Alaska that was shut down because it was discovered that they were capturing stray cats, and cooking/serving them... and my homestay family in Japan offered me dog. (Which I didn't eat btw) This was the day after they served up the goldfish that had been in the fish tank in the hallway.
    Eeeww.

    Quote Originally Posted by daylilies View Post
    I know Sarah. It's tough. All I can tell you is, pick your battles! Or you'll be battling all day.

    Speaking of battles, the other day I told Josh to go up and pick out a shirt. It was hot out, and he came out with a sweatshirt on. He was so proud that he picked it out and put it on all by himself, but DH was afraid we'd look like bad parents if we took him out in a sweatshirt in 70 degree weather. He managed to coax Josh into a T shirt but I thought it would have been better to let him stay in it and if he got hot he'd learn not to pick out a sweatshirt when it's hot out. (we did tell him he would be hot in it and he still wanted to wear it) What do you guys think of situations like that?
    I agree with you. I think it would have been a great opportunity for him to learn by experience.


  8. #10658
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    Moose and elk, didn't even think of those!

    OMG I would so lose a lot of weight if the options were dog and goldfish and horse.....

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  9. #10659
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cosmosmom View Post
    Because I like chicken and I like beef too much. I just feel bad eating it but not quite bad enough. I don't really know how to do things vegetarian style like with beans and soy. I don't like eggs. and with the gastric bypass I have to be careful to get in my protein (because food bypasses the first 5 ft of upper intestine, I have to be careful for absorption issues). I do LOVE cheese but have to be careful with milk (surgery left me somewhat lactose intolerant)....and I like nuts.

    so yeah I like the idea in theory and wish I could do it but I just don't think that I could realistically.
    I'm the same way. I was a vegetarian for years, and I could go back, but I just don't care enough to make it a priority.

    I confess that I drank way too much coffee this afternoon, and now I can't sleep (it's nearly 2am here).


  10. #10660
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    All this talk about unusual food sources has made me hungry for duck. I LOVE duck. Not that you were talking about duck, but someone mentioned not liking it up thread! I like buffalo and elk, too, but I don't care for fish/seafood. I don't know that horse would necessarily be any worse than other similar animals, but horses seem to have a lot of personality to me. I'd have a hard time eating horse just like I know I could never eat dog or cat. Then again, pigs are very intelligent animals and I love bacon! I guess it's just all about what you are comfortable with, in the end.

    Goldfish, though? Is there even enough meat on a goldfish to justify cooking it? I ate quail once and I just felt guilty. We have lots of quail living wild here and they are so cute, and the quail was just so small and sad on my plate I hated to waste it. I won't ever eat that again.
    Me (39) DH (46) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  11. #10661

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    I love duck!
    Every year around Christmas I go back to my hometown and meet my dad and stepmom at this awesome Chinese restaurant and we get Peking duck to share.

  12. #10662

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    Quote Originally Posted by gwennero View Post
    All this talk about unusual food sources has made me hungry for duck. I LOVE duck.
    Yum!!!! I want some duck breast confit right now! Yummy salty fatty amazing yum...

    "Any idiot can face a crisis; it is this day-to-day living that wears you out." -Anton Chekhov


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    Quote Originally Posted by katycat24 View Post
    Yum!!!! I want some duck breast confit right now! Yummy salty fatty amazing yum...
    Oh, YUM!!!
    Me (39) DH (46) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  14. #10664

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    You guys, I totally lost my cool tonight in front of the kids. Dbf left to go pick up our milk a half hour away and was gone for 4 hours. For 2 1/2 of those hours he wasn't answering his phone. I was beyond worried. I heard all of these sirens...just thinking the absolute worst because I knew he picked up the milk at 3:30 and here it is 7:00 and I'm thinking something terrible must have happened. Finally he comes home telling me how he was helping a friend look at apts. But after listening to him talk for a bit I can tell he he's had drinks. So I ask and he stumbles over his words saying he was here and there and when I question the indiscrepency he gets really, really mad. Asking me why am I doing this? Like it's me! He's lying! Again. Lying. And when I ask him why he is lying he walks away from me and as he's going down the hall I hear him say, "Why can't I just have a good woman? Why? I'm such a good person. I need a good woman."
    I lost it. And I hate myself for it. I'm so sorry, you guys, that I am forever in here complaining about him.
    Last edited by Bridget; 05-03-2010 at 08:37 PM.

  15. #10665

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    Bridget, really, don't worry about it. I think you should go out one night and do the same thing to him and see how he feels.

  16. #10666

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    Quote Originally Posted by bridgetwu75 View Post
    You guys, I totally lost my cool tonight in front of the kids. Dbf left to go pick up our milk a half hour away and was gone for 4 hours. For 2 1/2 of those hours he wasn't answering his phone. I was beyond worried. I heard all of these sirens...just thinking the absolute worst because I knew he picked up the milk at 3:30 and here it is 7:00 and I'm thinking something terrible must have happened. Finally he comes home telling me how he was helping a friend look at apts. But after listening to him talk for a bit I can tell he he's had drinks. So I ask and he stumbles over his words saying he was here and there and when I question the indiscrepency he gets really, really mad. Asking me why am I doing this? Like it's me! He's lying! Again. Lying. And when I ask him why he is lying he walks away from me and as he's going down the hall I hear him say, "Why can't I just have a good woman? Why? I'm such a good person. I need a good woman."
    I lost it. And I hate myself for it. I'm so sorry, you guys, that I am forever in here complaining about him.
    Oh, Bridget. HUGE hugs. He's such an idiot. He shouldn't have done what he did. Not one bit. He could have at least answered his phone or let you know what he was doing. Just disappearing for four hours without letting you know about it is unacceptable.



    And for the record, you are free to vent about it or anything else as much as you want, whenever you need to. We are all here.
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  17. #10667

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    Bridget - I think that it is perfectly fine you were upset. Seriously, even in front of the kids. Because what he did was wrong. Not just leaving and not answering the phone, but I think it is worse that he then tried to somehow blame you for lacking something (goodness of all things!), as if that would keep him from doing these bad things.

    It think it is worse for your kids to see one adult treat another adult like that and everyone act as if it is normal. That is NOT normal and I would hate it if your kids thought that it was.

    He is incapable of being who you need him to be. I'm sorry if that is harsh, but he is simply not on your level in any way.

    "Any idiot can face a crisis; it is this day-to-day living that wears you out." -Anton Chekhov


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    Who the eff does he think he is?! He tried saying that you are not a GOOD woman!? If I were a man Bridget........................... seriously! lol and What did he do with the milk while he was "helping his friend"?

    And feel free to vent as much as you need to. Thats what we are here for.. to listen. (and sympathize) I know I vented quite a bit about B for a while... and I'm sure I will need to vent about him in the future...

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    Quote Originally Posted by gwennero View Post

    Goldfish, though? Is there even enough meat on a goldfish to justify cooking it? I ate quail once and I just felt guilty. We have lots of quail living wild here and they are so cute, and the quail was just so small and sad on my plate I hated to waste it. I won't ever eat that again.
    It wasn't like the tiny feeder goldfish.. It was one of those ones that gets HUGE.. now that I think about it, it really may not have been a goldfish, but that's what we've always called it, and what it looked like. Just big.

    I don't know that I have ever had quail, but have had ptarmigan. y-u-m!

  20. #10670
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    Quote Originally Posted by katycat24 View Post
    Bridget - I think that it is perfectly fine you were upset. Seriously, even in front of the kids. Because what he did was wrong. Not just leaving and not answering the phone, but I think it is worse that he then tried to somehow blame you for lacking something (goodness of all things!), as if that would keep him from doing these bad things.

    It think it is worse for your kids to see one adult treat another adult like that and everyone act as if it is normal. That is NOT normal and I would hate it if your kids thought that it was.

    He is incapable of being who you need him to be. I'm sorry if that is harsh, but he is simply not on your level in any way.
    I second this, 100%.

    Bridget, I don't know if I've told you my DH used to have a drinking problem (he's been sober for 18 months now) but for me it was the lying that was out of control. That was worse than the drinking. He would do things like tell me he was going to lunch with a friend, and I would tell him I needed him back by a certain time. Then he wouldn't show up so at 3:30 I'd call and he'd tell me he hadn't ordered yet. When he left the house at 11:30. The lying almost ended our marriage - it would have if he hadn't quit. When he quit, the random disappearances and the lying also stopped. Right away.
    Me (39) DH (46) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  21. #10671
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    Quote Originally Posted by atenielle View Post
    It wasn't like the tiny feeder goldfish.. It was one of those ones that gets HUGE.. now that I think about it, it really may not have been a goldfish, but that's what we've always called it, and what it looked like. Just big.

    I don't know that I have ever had quail, but have had ptarmigan. y-u-m!
    Oh, I know what you're talking about. They're called carp, or koi or something, but I think they're actually the same fish as goldfish. But still...
    Me (39) DH (46) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

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    Bridget, your dh makes me madder than anyone I know IRL.

    I've had quail, octopus, snails, pretty much lots of weird stuff. I'm an adventurous eater, but I can't say I'm too fond of any of the weirder foods I try. I don't even like game. It's too gamy. Japan has some really weird food, and I mostly lived on noodle soup when I was there. For the lack of ick factor, and because food is so pricey a $10 bowl of Ramen was about all I could afford at each meal. I don't get grossed out with the idea of other people eating cats, dogs, guinea pigs, or rats, but I think those are the animals I'd have the hardest time with. Oh, and I also passed up the fried bugs in Thailand. *Shudder*

    Dh thinks I'm being too brutally honest when I tell the children that beef is from a cow (and I moo for emphasis), etc. but I figure if they always know this, if they grow up knowing it, then there won't be this huge shock/betrayal when they realize meat is the same thing as animals.


  23. #10673
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lydia View Post
    Bridget, your dh makes me madder than anyone I know IRL.

    I've had quail, octopus, snails, pretty much lots of weird stuff. I'm an adventurous eater, but I can't say I'm too fond of any of the weirder foods I try. I don't even like game. It's too gamy. Japan has some really weird food, and I mostly lived on noodle soup when I was there. For the lack of ick factor, and because food is so pricey a $10 bowl of Ramen was about all I could afford at each meal. I don't get grossed out with the idea of other people eating cats, dogs, guinea pigs, or rats, but I think those are the animals I'd have the hardest time with. Oh, and I also passed up the fried bugs in Thailand. *Shudder*

    Dh thinks I'm being too brutally honest when I tell the children that beef is from a cow (and I moo for emphasis), etc. but I figure if they always know this, if they grow up knowing it, then there won't be this huge shock/betrayal when they realize meat is the same thing as animals.
    I actually think that's a really important concept for kids to learn. My parents both grew up on farms so they raised us with that knowledge and I'm glad they did.

    I really don't like Japanese food. My sister's husband is from Japan and he is restaurant manager for a Japanese club/restaurant and brings my sister the weirdest food. She always treats me like I'm crazy or a wimp or something but I just don't like the style of food. Most cuisines I will find something I like but that one is hard for me. Sushi is so popular that people just don't understand my reaction, but I've been to Japan and I've eaten the food there. Don't care for it, not going to change my mind.
    Me (39) DH (46) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  24. #10674
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    Bridget, I don't even know what to say.

    I saw something last night about a book called "Why not eat Insects?". The author is making the case that we eat crustaceans (basically insects of the sea) , so why not insects?


  25. #10675

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    My kids are totally aware the meat is animals. In fact, almost any night that I cook they ask me, "What animal is this?" When Savana first discovered that chicken was chicken she said something like, "I don't know why I don't feel bad. I love animals so much. But I don't feel bad."
    And thanks for the support ladies.

  26. #10676

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    Quote Originally Posted by bridgetwu75 View Post
    My kids are totally aware the meat is animals. In fact, almost any night that I cook they ask me, "What animal is this?" When Savana first discovered that chicken was chicken she said something like, "I don't know why I don't feel bad. I love animals so much. But I don't feel bad."
    And thanks for the support ladies.
    That is so cute of Savana!!

    And I agree with the rest of the ladies that you had a right to be mad about that milk run.

    Erin

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    Quote Originally Posted by katycat24 View Post
    Bridget - I think that it is perfectly fine you were upset. Seriously, even in front of the kids. Because what he did was wrong. Not just leaving and not answering the phone, but I think it is worse that he then tried to somehow blame you for lacking something (goodness of all things!), as if that would keep him from doing these bad things.

    It think it is worse for your kids to see one adult treat another adult like that and everyone act as if it is normal. That is NOT normal and I would hate it if your kids thought that it was.

    He is incapable of being who you need him to be. I'm sorry if that is harsh, but he is simply not on your level in any way.
    ITA. Why can't you find a good man Bridget? (being spiteful here and sarcastic at him). You deserve more than what he's giving you. Look at all the heartache he causes you. Can he honestly say you cause any amount of grief in his life? I hardly think so. The only grief he has is because he wants to come and go without any accountability, and doesn't want to be questioned about it. Well, sorry buddy but that's not how a good man acts. He needs to straighten up.

    Quote Originally Posted by Lydia View Post
    Bridget, your dh makes me madder than anyone I know IRL.

    ...

    Dh thinks I'm being too brutally honest when I tell the children that beef is from a cow (and I moo for emphasis), etc. but I figure if they always know this, if they grow up knowing it, then there won't be this huge shock/betrayal when they realize meat is the same thing as animals.
    ITA with this too...

    and I don't ever remember a time not knowing where meet came from. There are really kids that didn't know?

    I grew up in the country, but my parents never strangled a chicken in the backyard either. Almost all our meet came from the grocery store, although my father did hunt. I've had wild turkey, deer, rabbit, and squirrel.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  28. #10678

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    My sil got upset with me for telling my nephew that beef was cow. Savana was a baby chewing on her stuffed cow and he said, "EWWWW. Eating cow??? That's disgusting" and I said, "A hamburger is cow." My sil cut me off and said they hadn't let him know that fact of life. I felt bad because I had no intention of overstepping my boundaries.
    When we go fishing and someone catches a fish Savana will yell, "Yum! Go cut the face off and we can eat it for dinner!"

  29. #10679
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    I never knew anyone who didn't tell their kids what a hamburger was. Why keep it a secret? It seems like it just makes things harder when they're older.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  30. #10680
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    Quote Originally Posted by daylilies View Post
    I know Sarah. It's tough. All I can tell you is, pick your battles! Or you'll be battling all day.

    Speaking of battles, the other day I told Josh to go up and pick out a shirt. It was hot out, and he came out with a sweatshirt on. He was so proud that he picked it out and put it on all by himself, but DH was afraid we'd look like bad parents if we took him out in a sweatshirt in 70 degree weather. He managed to coax Josh into a T shirt but I thought it would have been better to let him stay in it and if he got hot he'd learn not to pick out a sweatshirt when it's hot out. (we did tell him he would be hot in it and he still wanted to wear it) What do you guys think of situations like that?
    I would either have given him choices of t-shirts to wear and let him pick from that.....OR I would have just let him wear the sweatshirt and brought a t-shirt along for when he got too hot. Not something worth a battle over.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

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