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Thread: Secular Confessions

  1. #43471

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    Good to know, good to know. Thanks y'all.

  2. #43472
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    Quote Originally Posted by Suja View Post
    One thing that hasn't been brought up. Little dogs are exponentially harder to reliably toilet train than larger dogs. It can be done, but with being right on top of the dog for a good 6 months. I would think that it would be challenging with the kids around. IMO, the best things for families are older dogs that are already house trained, with known temperaments. That way, you'll know if they are good with cats, dogs, chicken, kids, etc.
    True THAT! My parents shih tzu bichon mix....OMG it was well over a year before he was mostly potty trained. He like to leave presents on the brick on the fireplace. He was lucky he was cute. The tinier the dog, the harder it was to tell if it was squating. Cosmo was super easy and Molly wasn't bad either but I was on top of them pretty much all the time and taking them to the litter box every 20-30 minutes, after eating, after playing....spent a LOT of time at the litter box.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  3. #43473
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    Quote Originally Posted by Suja View Post
    There are many, many, many small dogs that are hunting dogs. Lots in the terrier family. They would NOT be small animal safe, including cats and chicken. Considering all the two and four legged you have to worry about, in your shoes, I'd worry primarily about temperament, and then everything else, including size. Pan, my Great Dane, was completely safe with every living creature. She had no prey drive to speak of. By contrast, my friend's 10 pound Miniature Pinscher, is good with dogs, but would kill cats, rabbits, frogs, whatever he can catch.

    Agree again. My parents other dog...the street dog my sister found and brought home and he sort of stayed is a mix of chichuaha and doxie....he has no fear and hardcore hunts birds in the yard. All 12 lbs of him. He is great with other dogs but that is it. Sister's lab mix goes after bunnies and such....but he LOVES cats (just not Cosmo!). His cats are his best friends.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  4. #43474

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    We had a Great Dane when DD1 was a little girl. He was an absolute sweetheart, like Pan. Never hurt a fly. Let all the neighborhood children, kids at the park, our cat, etc. just hang and lay all over him. They take up quite a bit of space, and obviously there's a lot of crap to shovel (I used to joke it was like going around after the elephant at the zoo) but oh, what a darling.
    -- mom to DD1 1/98 and DD2 10/09


  5. #43475

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    Phew, things are finally calming down here a bit. Yay! I've missed you ladies.

    Good job on your first day of school, Noe! Poor sweet girl, that is so sweet that she loved school so much. I don't blame you for the bribe at all! If it helps, Maiya started out that way. She'd ask me when I was going to leave, then wouldn't want to come home (never really cried, though). Her teachers warned me that a lot of kids think school and getting away from mom is SO AWESOME. At first. Then they realize it's real, and happening all the time, and then the honeymoon period comes crashing down. We are at that point now! She still doesn't cry, but she tells me constantly that she doesn't want to go to school because I have to leave her... She loves school and has lots of fun there, she just wishes I could stay. She says she'd even rather be home doing dishes with me! But this place has been SO GOOD for her that she's stuck!

    Bridget, I never knew DBF had another kid, either. I do hope you get to meet- and get to know- the babies!

    Oh, L, where and when are you going camping? We may be all camped out, and our schedules are still pretty busy, but Maiya STILL asks why your kids didn't go camping with us, haha. She obviously missed you guys!

    Bridget, I agree with the others about dogs. Bigger and older is the way to go! I also STRONGLY advocate rescuing or adopting, instead of buying (or just getting free) from a breeder, but I won't get on my soap box about that. One thing I do want to mention is that, like everything else, don't take the words of others about ANY dog's temperament. Get to know the dog yourself. Which of course is another reason why older is better- because with a young pup, you never know for sure how they'll turn out. I just remember, when we adopted our dog Quincy, they said a bunch of things that are just plain not true (both good things and bad, hah).



  6. #43476

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    Nice to see you back!
    I totally agree that rescue is the way to go and have never gotten a furry Pet any other way. This puppy was offered 3rd hand and I don't know much about the owners. I have given a definitive no.

    We went to the fair and Savana could speak of nothing but trying to win a goldfish. I bought a couple buckets of balls. After Savana won, Kai wanted to try so I got 5 balls. He asked me to throw some too and wouldn't you know it, we both hit at the same time. "Mine" has died but we have 2 goldfish, 2 saltwater tanks, a beta fish, 5 chickens and 2 cats. We've been discussing a lizard or 2 baby chicks. It's not th right time for a dog so unless the perfect mutt falls into our laps we're putting that on hold.

    I have been under the weather the past 2 days and today I am just wiped and was looking forward to an early bedtime. But Sawyer slept until 6pm his nap! I thought I waS going to cry with his demands and hardships when all I want is sleep. I asked if we could lay on the couch and watch tv. He doesn't want anything to do with cartoons. I put an old 1970's Ike and Tina concert on and he is mesmerized! Has not tore his eyes away or made a peep.

  7. #43477

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    Good to be back, hope to stick around a bit this time!

    Aw, see, I knew I liked the way you think. Hope the sweet little pup finds a home, but it certainly sounds like you made the right choice! I've had this crazy thought lately about getting an aquarium... Probably salt water. That would be so cool! Maiya would love it. Ever since holding them in Hawaii, I've wanted a sea horse, and so does Maiya. Hah! Where would I put anything at all in our tiny, stuffed little house??

    How funny, Sawyer! No cartoons, but a concert... He has good taste! Hope it keeps him mesmerized so you can at least rest... Hope you feel better soon!

    I'm currently working on uploading billions of pictures and videos from the last few months... I apologize to any of you who are my friends on FB!!



  8. #43478
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    With regards to the pet issue, I am feeling so guilty right now because Travis desperately wants a cat and a girl I know is getting divorced and moving back to America, forcing her to have to rehome her 3 cats and 2 dogs. She's offered us her youngest cat that is 2 years old. He's a big, fat orange cat, and I've always loved orange kitties. I grew up with loads of cats and dogs and other various pets; I've told you all about the squirrels we had and the fox. I just can't picture having any pets now. I don't think it's the right time in my life to take on another responsibility. 2 boys, a husband and full-time job keep me busy enough, but I feel bad about not taking the cat that needs a home and I feel bad for saying no to Travis. He loves animals so much. We'll probably end up with a gerbil to appease him. I suggested it to Rich, actually, and he was like, "But what do gerbils do?" He is very anti-pet because he doesn't want anything that would mess up the house/furniture and have to remember to feed it and all that.

    Any how, I have a minute to type since both kids are out of the house right now, so I'll quickly tell you all about camping, or glamping as we call it here. We had a great time while we were away. It was better than what I thought it would be. We drove in to the site and checked in at reception. They told us to drive through the gates and a warden would meet us in a few minutes and we could follow him in our car to where our pitch would be. We got a really good spot on a corner right near the shower/toilet blocks. We were camping with 2 other families we know from Travis' school. We've gotten to know them a little bit through the past 2 years. They arrived about half an hour after us and we all helped each other put the tents up. Actually, we let the men do most of the work while we took the kids for a wander around the site. We ended up finding a play area right outside the pub (yes, there was a pub on site-this is England, you know!) and the kids spent an hour playing there while we all had a drink!

    The first day was good and we spent it all on site; the mums took the kids swimming in the afternoon and then we hung out at our pitches in the evening while the kids played (fought, mostly!) and we just chilled. We ended up retreating to our tents around 11pm because it started to rain a little. The second day was good because we got up, had breakfast, got showered, and then went to a nearby attraction that was a massive nature reserve type place with gigantic rock formations to climb on. The kids loved it. My sister-in-law and her family met us there, and it felt like the more, the merrier then. We ended up going back to the pitches in the evening and having a big barbecue. The kids played on their scooters and played cricket. There was less fighting amongst the kids when there was more of them around. We stayed up til nearly midnight drinking wine and having a laugh about all sorts of stuff.

    When we got home I said to Rich that being around the other couples made me realize how lucky I am to be married to such a nice guy. The other two husbands were good enough people, but they just sat there and shouted at their kids when they were being a bit cheeky or whatever. One of the men never seemed to get up from his camping chair. Rich is such an active dad. He took the boys to the park at one point and was always trying to find ways to keep the peace and keep them entertained. During one of our evening chats, the lazy husband was sort of bragging about how much he knew about drugs, and Rich stopped him and said, "We have no experience with that kind of stuff so you could be telling me anything." I smiled when he said that because for so long I've always thought that people seem so worldly who go off and experiment with drugs and travel and all that, and it's only just recently that I realize that I am happy with who I am and I think that I am cool for having my own convictions and beliefs and I can stand by them.

    So, all-in-all, it was a good little mini trip and we'll definitely go camping again. I did miss my makeup and hair straightener though, so I wouldn't go for longer than 2 or 3 days. And I did miss checking in with you guys as well!

  9. #43479

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    Sounds awesome, Ash! I am jealous of a pub on grounds! I think the fact that you ate so aware of how awesome you and your dh are, and so able to see the and appreciate the gifts in your life, speaks so much as to what a beautiful soul you are. A lot of people have so many blessings right under their nose and can't even see it.

  10. #43480
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    I think that people who do rescues are great. My sister is like that...both her cats and her dog were from the shelter. Plus she did foster with a mama kitty and the babies. Still has the mama kitty for now as the shelter is pretty full but the kittens have gotten homes.
    I have looked at them many times but it's always been big dogs, pits or pit mixes, or very tiny yappy dogs. None of which I want. Or if it's the kind of dog I want, it's got a lot of issues.....no kids, doesn't like other dogs, that sort of thing. So I have always ended up with a puppy. There is just something about getting that bond going from the start and being able to have more control shaping and molding into the dog that fits us. In some ways Cosmo and Molly are very different in their personalities. But in some ways they are two the same. And well now that it's been almost 2 years since we had a puppy, I can say that they are really cute and fun. LOL In a few more years I will be ready to do it again.
    In many ways, it's like how we feel with adoption....great that there people who feel able and want to adopt teenagers....but we really want want to start with a new baby.

    Ash, glad that you such a great time! Question...do you see as many bugs there? It seems like I remember seeing a lot less bugs when I was in France and thinking at the time that it would maybe be fun to camp someplace less buggy. We have too many bugs.
    And yeah for your awesome DH! I can really relate to what you said yours....except that I haven't seen mine be a parent to a human yet. We have never been ones to go to a bar and party and are homebodies....but I like it like that. And no drama. He's got his quirks and i have been annoyed with him, not sure that I have been outright angry and pissed off at him. I have always felt so lucky to have gotten together so early on. And he cleans.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  11. #43481
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    Jennifer, there aren't really any crazy bugs like there are inthe USA. The only thing there is is something called midges. I've never been bitten by one or really seen one, but I think they are something like a tiny mosquito or gnat. They make itchy patches on whomever they bite. They only come around in the warmer summer weeks.

  12. #43482
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    OH see that is much better for something like camping....I would maybe even try it. I don't often like being in my own yard with all the dang bugs. It just seemed like I don't remember that many screens on windows when I was in France and our french girl being shocked by the bugs here....and she had pretty strong reactions to all the mosquito bites she got the three times she was with us over the summer.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  13. #43483
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    Ash you camping trip sounds like heaven! I'm soooo jealous of the pub on the campground, and right next to the play area?! Woo hoo!! Although, you know if they had that in America, all the rednecks would get wild and ruin it for everyone. Which is probably why no park I've ever been do had such a setup.

    Your dh sounds like a dream.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  14. #43484
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    Uggg, Molly has gotten in a bit of trouble with the litter box last night. Or really this morning at 5am. I am not sure what I'm going to do. I could try closing the laundry room door...and maybe if Cosmo or her really have to go they will wake me up and I can take them. Or I could start kenneling Molly at night but have gotten really used to her sleeping against my legs so don't like that option. Really I don't think that there is a reason that they need to be going in the middle of the night other than they can so they do. I just heard Cosmo get up at 5am and didn't get in there fast enough and ended up having to yell at Molly and she had to go in her house until I got up in two hours.
    Molly is really a sweet and awesome little dog....except this one thing (ok maybe a few things like being so nervous in the car but that is showing some improvement). She knows it's not good. It doesn't seem to make her sick. But it's DISGUSTING. And she is going to be 2 yrs old in a month so she shouldn't be doing this but doesn't seem to be outgrowing it. Just when we think it's finally done....she does it again. Of course the easiest is to limit access and we generally pick up right away but when I'm half asleep she is faster than me!

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

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    I'd restrict access to the litterbox. Like you said, they really shouldn't have to go except in an emergency, and hopefully, they know how to wake you up. Do they have access to it during the day, when you're both at work? Because this could be going on when no one is around to watch as well.

  16. #43486
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    Cosmo does but Molly is usually kenneled....mostly because we don't want her to accidentally push Cosmo off the back of the couch. Dh works third and I'm first so one if us is home most of the time. Cos mostly goes outside and usually more predictable. But I was thinking I might keep the laundry room and box closed when there is a mobile baby...so this might help them get used to asking instead of running in whenever.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  17. #43487
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    So last night the door was closed and it seemed to work. Molly did wake me up at 5am to go. Not sure if Cosmo knows how to wake me up or not. I think she would probably just stare at me where Molly will get up by my face and whine. Just wish I could figure out why Molly does that. So gross and they eat mostly the same foods...but it's only Cosmo's that Molly goes after, never her own. Blech.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  18. #43488
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    I saw my SIL this morning, and she was telling me about what happened at her house in the early hours of this morning. She lives on a main street where lots of people walk past because there are lots of little side streets in her neighborhood. It was about 4AM and she heard someone outside her house sobbing loudly and shouting. She looked out and it was a teenage girl all on her own with a phone in her hand and soaking wet (we had a massive downpour that woke us all up just after midnight).

    The girl had no idea where she was. She was on the phone to her mother spelling the name of the street sign she was standing by. SIL went to her and asked her if she was ok. She said she'd been out with her friends in the local attraction that is 5 miles from SIL's house and had somehow gotten separated from them all. She was lost and trying to find home. And she'd been drinking.

    SIL got on the phone to this girl's mom and told her that she'd stand out with her until she got there (and the girl's mom had called the police as well). SIL said she didn't feel like it was the right thing to do to ask her in to her house, but she did bring her a towel to dry off. She said the policeman pulled up, asked if she was ok and then left, which she thought wasn't very thorough of him. Her parents then put her in their car and drove off. No one else on the street bothered to do anything, which I suppose they were probably still sleeping. SIL is a very light sleeper.

    Any how. That was their drama for the day. It's safe to say that things like that don't happen in my hood which is full of oldies!

  19. #43489

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    Scary! Poor girl

  20. #43490
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    That poor girl. I'm so glad it was your SIL who found her.
    Me (39) DH (46) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

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    Goodness, how scary! Glad she was okay.

  22. #43492
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    I'm surprised the officer just left her like that. It must be a very safe area. Even where I live, where nothing ever happens, an officer would generally either offer the teen a ride home or wait with her for her parents. Bobbie hit a deer when she was in college and living at the dorm. She was very upset and the officer offered to follow her the 5 miles back to school. She was so shaken up, though, she said she wanted to wait for us to get to her (35 miles!). He stayed right there until we arrived. I thought that was very sweet of him.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  23. #43493
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    Yeah, SIL was not happy that the policeman was so nonchalant about.it. She was saying that it was a good thing that the girl hadn't been harmed in any way because he acted like he didn't care at all. I think the police are a bit jaded with the drinking culture over here. The only time I've ever been to the ER (or A&E as they call it here) was a few years ago when Travis had croup (and I was 7months ppregnant with Cash) and we saw loads of teens and younger people wheeled in on stretchers from alcohol abuse.

    Having said all that, I've just arrived home from a wedding evening function and have had a lovely time drinking wine! I hope what I've typed is coherent!

  24. #43494
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    Just wanted to pop in and say Classes officially start back today so I probably won't be around too much until we get a good flow going.

    Things are a little crazy, but I'm loving every minute of it My Blog


  25. #43495
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    I'm working from the office now, so not around much either.

  26. #43496
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    I think I have officially crossed over into the older age....I didn't care about the VMA's and don't like half the new stuff. I don't mind a performance that is sexy or edgy....but found the Miley thing totally disgusting. Mostly the stuff she was doing with the foam finger. And this twerking nonsense...blech. The thing just wasn't cool or hot or edgy...it was just stripper slutty.

    I was also looking at baby stuff online again the past few days. Things like bouncers, jumpers, swings. My DH doesn't like how that stuff looks and is more a minimalist. I would want all three. He will not go for a big swing but I did find one that I think he will go for that swings and is a bouncer and is portable. The jumperoos he thinks are ugly....and doesn't want the entire house taken over with baby gear. It took forever before we found a pack n play that he agreed to in terms of looks. And OMG the highchair. Almost all got an ugly remark from him. Finally he liked this one because it matches our kitchen/dining room...the dark wood with the taupe pad. http://www.amazon.com/OXO-Sprout-Cha...oxo+high+chair
    I get that none of that stuff is necessary but wouldn't mind a few things to make life a little easier.
    I like to be prepared and while I don't have a project right now so looking at baby stuff is something to do. Plus I like to put stuff in my amazon cart and wait for a good price.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  27. #43497
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    I honestly don't understand the uproar, nor the double standard. It's okay for the guys be lewd and vulgar, but not the girls? She can neither sing, nor dance, IMO. And she really doesn't seem to be able to pull of sexy - the whole thing came off as over produced, stiff (Ha!) and not altogether attractive.

    This, OTOH, is food for thought: http://groupthink.jezebel.com/solida...rus-1203666732

    Don't sweat the baby stuff, Jennifer. Some of this will be sequential. Your baby will likely outgrow the bouncy/swing WELL before you need to add jumperoos/swings/high chair. We have a version of this, as the high chair: http://www.amazon.com/Fisher-Price-S...7621152&sr=1-3 Takes up WAY less space.

  28. #43498
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    Oh that was interesting. And something I didn't really notice but in a way I did. I knew something other than the foam finger made me uncomfortable and didn't seem right.
    And no, I don't like it when men get really raunchy either.
    Just something is different when it's a talented dancer/performer doing something edgey vs someone without so much talent being a stripper on stage and just trying to be trashy to be shocking. Blech.

    I love him, I really do. But he can drive me a tad crazy. Carseats...he actually cared if they clashed or matched the cars. OMG. LOL
    Nope, he wouldn't like the space saver one. The dining room is one area where space isn't so much an issue. He just wanted something wood that would look nice. Eventually I usually find something we both like and has good reviews. Just wish he didn't care so much.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  29. #43499
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    Ha, he thinks the house WON'T be taken over with baby gear??? Your poor naive hubby

    Swing, IMO, is a neccesity, but Nolan *loved* it. We are getting this one this time http://www.amazon.com/Fisher-Price-Z...=IUJWK4IY9JRWN I loved it for two reasons 1) it plugs in 2) the part the baby lays in comes out and functions kind of like a bouncer

    ETA We will be down sizing, item wise, compared to with Nolan though. Like with the swing (so we don't need a bouncer) and than we'll be getting a walker over an exercauser/jumper. Than again, you never know, this LO might hate the swing and love a jumper - flexibility is important
    Last edited by Smplyme89; 08-27-2013 at 12:04 PM.

    Things are a little crazy, but I'm loving every minute of it My Blog


  30. #43500
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    The Miley thing is so cringe worthy because she just looks like she's drugged up and doing whatever she can to get people to go, 'Wow, look at HER!' Bizarre. And I haaaate that Blurred Lines song! It makes my skin crawl.

    My uni course starts next week, so I probably won't have time to post much (as if I post that much any way!) I'll still be moderating but might not have time to post. I'll still be addicted to FB though!

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