He has a son who is 22, about to have a 2nd baby. Super long story short is that dbf missed J's childhood. After Savana was born I really wanted her to meet her bro so we flew him to HI. So, since then we have seen him only 4 times. It kills me, but it's not my place to push things, though I have. Every time we see him, it's great. Him and I really get along well. He is a bit of a tortured soul but I can understand, in spite of all dbf' s protests that it wasn't his fault, he grew up likely thinking his dad didn't give a ****. It has to be hard to heal from that. So when he leaves after his visits, he pretty much disappears. He won't answer calls or texts but will randomly call or text telling us how much he loves us along with a dozen reasons he hasn't called (his phone is "broken" a lot). And we haven't even met his son. His break up with mom was ugly and custody is complicated. I'm sure we don't have the full story. I feel mostly like I wish he knew he could be genuine without judgement, at least from me. I hope that someday he will be around more. His little brothers and sisters worship.the ground he walks on. I think underneath the bravado, denial,substance abuse, and occasional laziness, there's a pretty spectacular man in there. I'm hoping he realizes that soon, especially with another 'lil one on the way.
And I WANT to meet the BABIES!