Secular Confessions

[Bridget]

Oh.My.God.
I'm shaking with silent laughter while nursing SAwyer.

Also currently watching Clinton's speech at the dem convention and totally seeing why my bro said on fb the other night he had a crush on bill clinton. Who knew what a big ol' hippy Bill is? Kumbaya!
Very inspiring speech.

[Suja]

Oh Lydia!

Actually, I wouldn't mind a little assistance. I had such a hard time sliding the applicator in all the way and keeping it there while I pushed the plunger thingy. Either the whole thing would go in too much, or it would all come sliding out.

Bridget, have you seen the comparison between Clinton's prepared speech and the version he actually did? That man has excellent instincts. http://www.usnews.com/news/blogs/was...epared-remarks

[Bridget]

Suja, i've had to waste a tampon before on a failed mission.
Off topic but can I ask you what I hope is not a stupid question? In the other thread, you said you know who you are voting for because you are a single issue voter. What is that single issue? IF you don't want to answer, of course that is totally fine.

[Suja]

Roe v. Wade. The next president could potentially appoint 4 justices to the SCOTUS.

[daylilies]

Both sides lie, both sides mudsling, both sides try to make themselves look good however they can. Neither side will do everything (if anything) they promised. Politics all around just suck. That's how I feel about the whole thing right now.

[AmeriBrit]

I've loved Bill Clinton since I was 12. Lol. I used to have a t-shirt with him on it with the state of Arkansas that I wore to school a lot and my cousin used to laugh at me for it.

[missychrissy]

Suja, have you tried different brands? OB has an applicator free one. It's an icky thought to insert with just your finger, but my daughter has better luck with them than trying to use an applicator. She doesn't use them all the time, but when she was in high school she was on the swim team. And they're really tiny (in comparison to other brands) so I image that makes them easier to get up in there. Of course, they expand like any other tampon.

As far as presidents go, I can't really say Obama has outright lied or failed to live up to his campaign promises. He's definitely tried and has been shot down by congress over and over. I've been disappointed-I didn't like him appointing the GE guy. I thought he compromised too much on the health care plan and it's nowhere near what I would have liked...but, it was his first term. He had to compromise. I'm just not sure he had to do it so much. He hasn't pulled us out of Afganistan like I would have liked either (by 2014? really? wtf?). And the economy...ugh. It's a mess. I cringe though when people harp about this administration blaming Bush for Obama's failures because things like the economy do take years to recover from. There's little doubt Bush started it and it's the worst economic state we've been in since the depression-so DUH, it's going to take a while to recover from that. There's little the president can do about it as far as speeding things up.

And Suja, I agree. Even if I were not into politics at all, the whole debate about women's rights regarding their healthcare is enough for me to vote for Obama all by itself.

[Cosmosmom]

Roe v. Wade. The next president could potentially appoint 4 justices to the SCOTUS.

That is a deal breaker to me too. Much as I want a baby and hope that women pick adoption, I don't want that to be the only choice.

[3andMe]

L's TAMPON PRIMER

I have been having better luck with plastic applicators, lately (I recommend the Tampax Pearls, unscented). Despite being bad for the environment and not flushable, and having used tampons successfully since I was 14 with cardboard, lately I have been having a lot of difficulty with the cardboard applicators getting stuck and not sliding through and depositing the tampon in. I have to pull the whole thing out and hope I have another one within reach, and often the second one is more difficult because everything has been mopped up a little bit so it's like.... (grr, all of my analogies were funny but removed, one after the other, because, well, gross and inappropriate, and the ones that were polite enough for this forum just didn't fit quite as well--just like that second tampon).

So, anyway, start with the proper tools for the job. I have used applicator-less tampons also, like OB, but for me it's important to have clean hands while inserting. I have had a personal friend who was hospitalized with toxic shock syndrome, so I'm always concerned with cleanliness before as well as after, and I don't like to have my finger there in any public restroom where I have to touch doors and doorknobs and kids and then put it in, and hold all of my kids in place during and after. It's too hard.

Putting it in. Don't just aim and shove. You don't have to use both hands if you don't want to, but take the tip and nudge around a little bit so the area is exposed (I'm trying to be delicate with my words AND my actions here). It hurts if a little bit of skin is pulled the wrong way. Once it's clear, go in and aim toward the small of your back. I have my thumb and middle finger around the ridged base of the stable support section, and my index finger ready to deploy the part where the string is hanging out. Start deploying the tampon with your index finger. If you run into your cervix, don't stop, just angle to the right or the left or up or down until you find a more comfortable position. When it is fully deployed, the ridged base and your fingers should be close to/touching your body and the tampon should be fully inside and you cannot feel the end of it just by lightly touching the outside. If it's not in far enough, it's uncomfortable. Do NOT give the string a tug to make sure it's secure, because that could just pull it out more.

I know that my cervix is low and to the right, so often my tampons are most comfortable lying alongside the left of it, but they always bump into it on the way in unless I specifically angle away from it. Another way it can be uncomfortable with insertion is if a tampon was recently removed that was still pretty dry. It's a good idea to be aware of your flow and use the right size that you need. If you tend to have really light periods, there are smaller sizes. Before I started having all of these really heavy periods, I used to use the smallest size (Lites) and Regulars most of the time. Lites are actually shorter than a regular one, also.

Anyone else have any tips, feel free to add them.

ETA: I know how to spell LIGHT, but I looked up the brand and they actually called them LITES, so that is what I wrote. I hate it when companies use the phonetic spelling for the word, like lite or nite or drive-thru. It annoys me and I think it's really confusing to people who are learning to read and write and spell, like children or ESLs. End rant.

[Cosmosmom]

So DH and I were watching Bill Maher last night and this guy who created the show Treme was on. David Simon might be his name. They were talking about the economy and he said people expect annuals to be planted and fix everything....but really someone needs to plant an olive tree that doesn't give you a freaking olive for seven years. We thought that was a really good point.

[missychrissy]

I just read the first line

L's TAMPON PRIMER

and snorted, laughed so hard I cried, and bounced on my couch cushion 'cause I couldn't barely stand it.

Now I'm going back to read L's tampon primer. God I love this board.

[missychrissy]

L, you are awesome. Excellent advice. I forgot I actually use the lights or 'for teens' ones myself because my AF visits are so light.

[raspberry]

My friends call it SNN-shaking no noise.

Now who is going to do a Diva cup primer? I need that soon.

[missychrissy]

I was all gung-ho to use a Diva Cup but thought I'd practice with the disposable Instead Cup first. Brenda (our mod on here) sent me a box of them. I was on the 3rd one when I had an 'incident' in the grocery store. Mine aren't particularly heavy, but this one was more so than others and I'd bent down to get something off a lower shelf and felt the gushing. It was so bad, I had to leave my stuff and go home...there was no recovering from it. It freaked me out enough that I never did try the Diva Cup.

They say you're not supposed to use them with the Mirena IUD anyway, but I figured as long as I was careful not to pull those strings it couldn't hurt anything.

[Gwenn]

O. M. G. L, your tampon primer deserves to be immortalized. It is a serious contribution to the betterment of womankind.

Oh, and I agree about Tampax Pearls. I hate that I can't flush the applicator, but they are SO much more comfortable and go in easier.

[AmeriBrit]

Big props to L for the tampon primer. You have helped us all, L! I love the Tampax Pearls as well and use the plastic ones, too. They have a better "glide" than cardboard ones. You mentioned "unscented." I didn't know they make scented ones. Now I'm imagining strawberry smelling tampons.

[Suja]

Now that Lydia has covered the ground pretty thoroughly on what to do, I can go over what not to do.

You know, the part where you're supposed to hold the applicator with your thumb and middle fingers while inserting? There is a reason for that, which is that if you use your thumb and index for inserting, now you've got to push the plunger with the middle finger (or the remaining two), and let me tell you, that does NOT work. I ended up using my other hand, because well, what I was doing wasn't working.

I realize that this is a waste of a tampon, but before you use one, you might want to unravel it and take a look at it. The reason being that when you go to remove it and find that the tip is kind of uneven looking, you don't have a total freakout (OMG! My tampon broke off! There is a piece inside of me and I'm going to die of Toxic Shock Syndrome), and start groping about inside, and finding nothing, come to the conclusion that as unlikely as it is, you must have somehow managed to shove the thing up through your cervix, and now you are REALLY screwed. Visions of ultrasounds and surgery dancing in your head 'cause your flow seems to be restored, and tip of the tampon must somehow be lodged inside your uterus. Since you're going to die anyway, might as well go through with the reason the tampon was bought for in the first place, and of course, discover during the course of removing that thing, that the tip of that tampon looks pretty much like the tip of the first one, and you either have TWO tampon tips stuck inside of you, or you're going to live and the tampon manufacturers have a sick sense of humor.

And yes folks, I have a graduate degree in Biology.

[missychrissy]

OMG. I'm sorry. That's is too f'n hysterical!

[Suja]

OMG. I'm sorry. That's is too f'n hysterical!

Oh, don't apologize. In retrospect, it's pretty funny.

[3andMe]

Oh, Suja. I can see why you wouldn't want to wear tampons. Hopefully that doesn't happen every time, at least. Right? Right?

The scented tampons are just awful. It's not like strawberries or anything, it's like deodorant trash bags. They also make the distinction between scented and unscented very difficult on the front of the box. I have stood in the store for minutes comparing two different boxes, trying to make sure I have the unscented kind. I end up with the scented one and regret it, but don't want to waste the huge box I got. I realized recently that the spare ones I was carrying around in my diaper bag, in the same pocket as my kleenex, had imbued my tissues with the odor of deodorant tampons and whenever I blew my nose I was inhaling that awful smell. I hate artificial scents anyway, and while I was sick and had that horrible 8-day headache and was blowing my nose all the time, that was the last thing I wanted. I finally said to heck with the wasted money, and threw the rest of my scented tampons away.

[Suja]

Forgot to mention that once I figured out that death was not imminent, we went on to have a very nice day.

Mira did beautifully in her first day of swim class, we had lunch at Red Robin, went to pick up DH and drove back in absolutely pouring rain. We get home, and power is gone. I realize it when my garage door refuses to open. And of course, I had left my keys INSIDE the house. And since DH was coming back from India, he had left his entire batch of keys at home as well. So, I go to the neighbor's house to confirm the power is gone, and to retrieve a spare key that was left there at least 10 years and one wife ago. No luck. But, he tells me how the paramedics broke into their house when his wife collapsed and needed urgent medical attention. Tried the same thing, and 30 seconds later, I'm inside the house. It was ridiculously easy, and I realized just how stupid we are to think that we are secure in our homes.

[Cosmosmom]

So nobody mentioned the best position to be in when trying to do this....standing? Sitting? One leg on the wall?

All the talk of swimming got me to think about maybe trying water aerobics again. I LOVE the water. I do not currently have a suit. So I ordered like 5 or 6 different ones online today and hope that one fits ok. It's so hard. My waist puts me in one size, my hips about 2 or 3 sizes bigger. Which is also 2 or 3 sizes bigger than most of the clothes in my closet that I'm currently wearing. Fingers crossed that at least one works and I will send back the rest of them.

I know summer isn't quite gone but it's like fall here. Have windows open and not even all of them as it would be too cold. And we made an apple pie today (crust too) so it smells so good in here.

Tomorrow it's back on WW for me. Took a break for the past 1.5 weeks because of being out of town.

[missychrissy]

I sit on the toilet & do it.

I've officially shared more with you than I think Rich knows...and he lived with me for nearly 20 years. You're all special.

[Gwenn]

Sitting on toilet is the standard version.

Suja, DH has broken into our house before when we happened to lock ourselves out. You're right, it is ridiculously easy to do and rather frightening.

[3andMe]

Either sit with legs apart (it's much harder if they're together) or stand, with one leg up. If you're standing, though, you risk the drip. I don't risk the drip unless I'm fresh out of the shower and wasn't planning on being on the toilet anyway.

[demigraf]

You guys, this tampon discussion is super useful. I'll make sure to take all this info and stick it under my hat. Unless you think there's somewhere else I should stick it...

Suja, I'm bored with my running music mix, so I've been downloading some "mashups" that are mixed and shared by DJs to make a new playlist. This one by Metallica and Panjabi MC made me think of you. I wasn't sure if you'd dig it or if it'd make you cringe, but seems to be a good beat to set a pace to.

[Suja]

You guys, this tampon discussion is super useful. I'll make sure to take all this info and stick it under my hat. Unless you think there's somewhere else I should stick it...

Suja, I'm bored with my running music mix, so I've been downloading some "mashups" that are mixed and shared by DJs to make a new playlist. This one by Metallica and Panjabi MC made me think of you. I wasn't sure if you'd dig it or if it'd make you cringe, but seems to be a good beat to set a pace to.

As big an idiot as I am, even I know that if you're sticking it under your hat, U R doin' it WRONG

I'll check it out tomorrow. When others are awake. I'd also like to see Mira's reaction.

Jennifer, I have always found that swimwear runs at least one size bigger than regular clothes. Even when I was 90 some odd pounds in college, I was a size 6 in bathing suit (and this somehow brought back memories of my first one, that I tried to dry by ironing - the results were predictable). I finally fit back into it, but dang, my body parts are not where they used to be.

[3andMe]

Jennifer, I just ordered from Lands End a swim tank and skirt after having a bikini for many years. The 20 pounds I put on in the past year, plus being over 40, plus the elastic in my old swimming suit not working very well, made me go from being scant to matronly in no time flat. But it was super practical. I was at a pool party last week and I hung out (not literally, just time-wise) in the pool all day, and then felt totally comfortable actually driving home in my then-dry bathing suit, and actually stopping to get gas in it. I also got bikini bottoms for times that I might feel weird in a swim skirt, but I was very happy with the ensemble.

I got something kind of like this with a swim skirt. The reviews on the site state whether or not it seems to be true to size. I found (unfortunately) that it was true to the size that I seem to be right now. Sigh.

[Bridget]

Jennifer or L, I need you help. Can you point me to a reliable source to find out info on lichen planus as a side effect to any of the following vaccines? Hep B, DTap, MMR?

[Cosmosmom]

I will have to keep lands end in mind if these ones I ordered don't work out. They have a couple of bottoms that look like they might work but I need a few inches off my hips. Like this one http://www.landsend.com/pp/womens-aq...s&origin=index Normally I would say that they have my size but that is no stretch and probably a bit small just yet. I am really excited about that option though.....I didn't think to look there as I didn't realize that they plus sizes.

I have two issues working against me for suits. First is being plus sized with a body shape that doesn't have sizing that conforms...smaller shoulders, DDD bust, smaller waist, big hips. The second is I have to have something like shorts or an aquatard. I have hidradenitis suppurativa and the worst area is the inner thighs. The skin there isn't pretty and I cannot have anyone see it....it's not contagious at all but looks like it probably is.

Funny thing is being plus sized in a suit doesn't bother me....figure that I'm big in regular clothes too anyway. But really I cannot see anything without my glasses and I don't wear them in the pool....so I kind of think that if I cannot really see anyone else, they cannot see me. LOL

I really miss swimming and have not done it mostly because of the suit issue and lacking one....but if not this fall than definitely in the spring!