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Thread: Secular Confessions

  1. #34441

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    I don't either, Chrissy!

    I hope you can work out those charges and get it back to your account. Money is so stressful. We are struggling right now too and it sort of follows one around like a little cloud doesn't it? I can't wait for dbf to start that job and have a steady paycheck. Today he has a few things to do for an elderly couple that pays him for home repairs so that will buy some groceries!

  2. #34442
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    When does he start his job?

    I'm hoping Rich accidentally paid one of his bills with my account (he's still on it) and I can just make him give me the money. Otherwise, I'll only have $23 for groceries & gas for 2 weeks. I know disputing charges takes forever to resolve. I have no hope of getting access to that money before my next payday.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  3. #34443

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    I remember one of my favorite teachers in high school telling our physical science class about his bidet experience in Europe on a ski trip with a friend of his. He was a young teacher at the time, around 24 so we all liked him because he was pretty cool. He even brought the first CD any of us had ever seen before when I was in 9th grade and it was the size of an LP record!! But he said him and his friend were standing over the toilet, after he had pooped mind you, and he was embarrassed at first to ask his friend - a guy, how to use the bidet because there was no toilet paper and how they were standing over it looking at it saying "maybe you do this....maybe you do that....I don't know you try this....No you try that...." and him putting his butt over it and getting poopy water all over the place. It was freaking hilarious!!! He was a funny teacher, Mr. Fisher. I wonder what happened to him.

    Chrissy, can you call your bank to ask them what the charge is? A charge like that would scare me, any unauthorized ACH transactions are scary. Do you write checks and if so, have you lost any checks? I don't keep them around because people can wipe your account clean with those numbers (routing and account) at the bottom of your check by buying a bunch of stuff online and some banks will not cover those charges like they will when a debit card gets stolen as Mastercard/Visa give fraud protection usually on debit cards but if they don't have a Master/Visa logo or if it is an ACH it goes by the bank's policy. When I worked for the bank we had a few people lose a lot via ACH transactions. Luckily our bank would cover most of the charges, but if they were over a certain amount, we wouldn't. Luckily the amount was $5000 but I did have a customer once who was taken for way more than that (over $20K) and they only got $5K back.

    Please call and check as soon as you can if you haven't already. If they try to say they can't tell, ask if they have an ACH department. They can call them and get the info from whoever processes their ACH transactions and can give time, date, and vendor as well as a contact number for the vendor in that department. If necessary, and I know it is a pain, but if you don't recognize it, I would have them close that account and give you a new one just for piece of mind.

    Erin

  4. #34444

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    Oh and regardless of what they say about fraud, they can give you a "provisional credit" to cover the charges the same day, including reversing any overdraft charges due to the fraudulent purchases. They will post within 24 hours. I always feel lucky that I used to work for the bank that I currently bank with, so any time something happens, I know what they can do and they usually try to give me the run around and I'll tell them to call a specific department to get done what I want done at that particular time.

    A couple years ago a lady stole my debit card and I got a provisional credit within 24 hours for over $1000 so it can be done. It was the same week as Thanksgiving so I knew that if it wasn't done that day that it would be held up over the holiday. A lot of the tellers at the bank didn't even know about getting the credit or who to call and I had to help them look up the number on their intranet lol! I used to know it by heart as I was a supervisor in customer service for a couple years and used to memorize all the important numbers to help customers. I wish more people in all industries, especially banking would go above and beyond what they normally to to help people when they are the victim of fraud especially. All of my customers got a provisional credit within 24 hours and I consistently had high rankings in "quality" and "client satisfaction." Most of my customers were referred to me after the lower level employees told them they had to wait 5-7 days for the fraud department investigation and many were unaware of other steps we could take to help customers while the investigation was ongoing so I would ask customers to forgive them.

    Erin

  5. #34445
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    I'm going to call them soon Erin. I was waiting till after 9 when I knew people would be there...it is an ACH withdrawal. Ugh.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  6. #34446
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    There was one in my bathroom when I was 15 and an exchange student in Spain. I assumed it was some sort of fancy urinal for the longest time. I got a condescending talking-to from the maid and the mom in my host family, with some pointed remarks about how it would help especially during 'that time of the month' for girls to be less stinky down there.

    I have used the fancy toilets in Japan with the warm water auto-rinse and the hot air dryer afterward, even available at gas stations (contrasting remarkably with average bathrooms without even soap or hot water at the sinks).

    I have used squat toilets in Asia.

    A lot of bathrooms in Asia have a simple hand-held showerhead sort of thing that is attached to the toilet and you can use it to either rinse yourself with clean water or wash off the toilet or spray the floor or your feet if they're dirty (it doesn't reach very far, but it's on a short flexible hose, and most bathroom floors are tiled. slightly sloped and have a drain in the middle and no bathmats or anything like that). I think it's one of the best inventions, ever, and I think it should be world-wide. It's far better than a bidet because it's more versatile. It may not have the posh status, but it's one less basin to have to clean, and it actually helps clean other things.

    Oh, Mylah, BTW, LOVED LOVED LOVED the windy/Wendy story.


  7. #34447
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    I don't even know what an ACH is.

    Money issues suck. Ours this month was getting a letter "friendly reminder" to pay our mortgage. This was like 13-14 days AFTER we mailed it. The other three bills mailed the exact same time got to their destinations. We still don't know where this check is. Our bank is a local credit union and I called them and they transferred the money for the mortgage directly from checking. So at least we didn't get a late fee. And we had to pay to get a stop order on that check. We have duplicates so know that it was definitely made out correctly to the bank and we know for sure that it had a stamp on the envelope.
    We are not at all happy that the post office seems to have lost it though!

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  8. #34448
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    L, that's the sort of setup that you see routinely in India. Either that or a faucet nearby with a bucket and a mug in it for the same purpose (that's how we grew up). People there think westerners are disgusting because they don't wash their behinds, only wipe them, and attribute the stench emanating from the hippy tourists to having unwashed behinds.

    Chrissy, I hope you were able to get to the bottom of the ACH withdrawal. Hopefully, the bank is willing to work with you on giving you provisional credit. When we've had similar trouble, the bank was excellent about reversing charges.

  9. #34449

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    ACH stands for American Clearinghouse. It's a backbone network across financial institutions for transferring money electronically.

    Chrissy, I hope you get that sorted out. Do you think it's possible that Rich did that on purpose, knowing that it'd make things difficult on you? Not to presume that he'd be that malicious, but I'm just curious if he'd go there. I'm pretty sure none of us here would let you starve if it really ever came down to it, so know that we're here for you.

    When my girlfriends and I first encountered a bidet in a hotel room, we were 15 and used it as an ashtray. I think I might still have the pictures, but I hate seeing photos of myself smoking as a teen.

    My kvetch for the day is about the woman who works reception on our floor. First of all she creeps me out because she says things to me when I pass by her without picking her head up, so it makes me feel like she's always watching me, even when she's not watching me. Secondly, at times I come into the office, she makes a wink-nudgy comment, like "Oh, your boss is in town today, so you come in." Well, yeah, duh. When someone from my team is in town, and if we'd be more efficient/productive working together in person, of course I'll come into the office. But my team is spread out all around the country. We do everything over the phone and desktop sharing. I hate her conspiratorial tone, like I'm getting away with not coming in when they're not there or something. Everyone is fully aware that I work from home 90% of the time, and it's sanctioned because we all do it. It's very annoying, but not worth the time to even casually explain my team's telecommuting policy to her. I'm guessing she just wishes she didn't have to come in every day. But her working from home would kinda defeat the purpose of being a receptionist... if she's not there to receive.

    OK, and that said, now I'm off to the office. Tomorrow, we are leaving early for Tahoe where there will be no internet, TV or phone where we're staying. I might take a "Yoga on a Standup Paddleboard" class. Anyway, if I don't check-in with you before then, have a great weekend.

  10. #34450
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    Myles, have an awesome weekend, dude!

    Here's a picture of Cash playing in my MIL's bidet; this is the only one I've ever seen-no one ever uses it:

  11. #34451
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    Rich wouldn't ever do that to me. I never considered that as a possibility...he might have paid one of his bills and accidentally used our account though. I was hoping that was the case because then it would be a matter of calling him and telling him what happened. He'd have given me the money. But no...that's not what happened. My life has all kinds of excitement and none of it is the good kind I googled the numbers that the ACH withdrawal came from and it's a scam. Ironically, they always take $210. And they've done it a LOT. My bank said they couldn't immediately trace it and there was no name, address or phone number associated with the withdrawal. I had to go there and fill out a dispute form. It could take weeks, like I feared. I opened a 2nd account and I'm transferring my direct deposit to that.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  12. #34452

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    Crap, Chrissy. That sucks.

  13. #34453

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    Oh, good. It's nice to be able to trust Rich with your joint accounts while you're going through this separation. But that stinks about the scam! Wow, our information is so vulnerable these days. I just did a keyword search on my bank account for ACH just to be sure. Were they able to give you a provisional credit in the meantime? I hope so!

  14. #34454
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    No, they couldn't.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  15. #34455

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    Quote Originally Posted by 3andMe View Post
    A lot of bathrooms in Asia have a simple hand-held showerhead sort of thing that is attached to the toilet and you can use it to either rinse yourself with clean water or wash off the toilet or spray the floor or your feet if they're dirty (it doesn't reach very far, but it's on a short flexible hose, and most bathroom floors are tiled. slightly sloped and have a drain in the middle and no bathmats or anything like that). I think it's one of the best inventions, ever, and I think it should be world-wide. It's far better than a bidet because it's more versatile. It may not have the posh status, but it's one less basin to have to clean, and it actually helps clean other things.

    Oh, Mylah, BTW, LOVED LOVED LOVED the windy/Wendy story.
    I confess that I used our diaper sprayer one or 2 times like one would use a short, flexible hose in Asia. You just had to be careful to adjust the water pressure, because it was made to blast poop off a diaper. Anything less than a trickle was a world o' hurt.

    Glad you liked the Windy/Wendy story. Happy to be of service, m'lady.

    I just thought of a cute name for a little girl: "LaRue" (accent on the 2nd syllable). It's a French surname for someone who lives by a road, path or track, but also pronounced the same as/spelled differently from the word in my native language meaning "to play". DH & I have always thought that if we have a baby girl, we'd name her "Ruby Louella" or "Ruby Lou" for short. I think I'll run "Ruby LaRue" by him tonight. With hubby's unpronounceable French last name, her name could be quite the hilarious tongue-twister.

    I think we'd be at a loss for a boy's name. We gave both our favorites to Bodhi for his first and middle names.

    Speaking of which, I got my AF this morning. D'oh! Not that we've been trying consistently, but I'm more concerned about the fact that my period stayed "regular" this month, despite the fact that I didn't seed-cycle. If you recall, my period was irregular for decades until I started using the seeds my naturopath recommended this year. A regular period is incredibly new to me, and I was deliberately trying to make myself irregular again to guarantee I wouldn't get it during my half-marathon. I thought I would have to stay on the seeds to stay regular, but I guess the seeds have a more lasting effect than I'd supposed. Good to know if you do want to regulate your periods. But at this pace, I got mine exactly a month after my LMP, and I'm on track to get it on the day of the race. Boo!!!

  16. #34456

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    Quote Originally Posted by missychrissy View Post
    No, they couldn't.
    That totally sucks!

  17. #34457
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    Keep hope that it will be a day or two off still!

    I like Ruby LaRue! That is adorable. I love talking names. Dh is beyond tired of it. For us boy names are way easier than girl names.
    Boy name is Theodore and as a baby I'm calling him Teddy. Was going to be Theodore Wilson or Theodore Thomas (after my uncle). But now we are going to ask birth family if they want to give middle name. Second choice name if we had two boys was Harrison.
    Girl names we have been back and forth for a while and get on something until we change our minds. As of right now we would go with Cassandra and call her mostly Cassie.
    Girls we have considered strongly also have been Vanessa, Courtney, Holly (not now since we have a Molly for a dog), Rebecca, Rachel, Madeline, Katherine (this was actually the name for a number of years...going to be Katherine Cleo and I wanted to call her Kasey but too many people kept saying they would call her Katie and I didn't like that so much plus that is a coworkers daughter and once we decided on adoption I was probably going to lose the middle name rights so I nixed that one). Paige, Lucy, Juliet and Phoebe were ones I liked too but not DH. DH liked April, Mallory, Penelope and Autumn but I didn't. I like a lot of 80's names which aren't so popular now like Nicole, Stephanie, Lindsay, Megan, Melissa, Jessica.
    In general it seems that we like longer more traditional names with good nicknames....more like us with Jennifer and Anthony.
    Last edited by Cosmosmom; 08-16-2012 at 02:29 PM.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  18. #34458

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    Chrissy, that sucks.
    Shelley-mom to DS, 6

  19. #34459
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    Chrissy. That is just so sucky. I cannot believe that they are not willing to do more to help.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  20. #34460
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    Chrissy, I am so sorry. I admit I was worried Rich was behind it, too. Both good news and bad news that it was a scam.

    Quote Originally Posted by 3andMe View Post
    I have used the fancy toilets in Japan with the warm water auto-rinse and the hot air dryer afterward, even available at gas stations (contrasting remarkably with average bathrooms without even soap or hot water at the sinks).

    I have used squat toilets in Asia.
    I have a vivid memory of a fancy toilet experience in Japan. I was about 13 and it totally freaked me out. As did the squat toilets as well, on the same trip. What a contrast.

    Quote Originally Posted by demigraf View Post
    I just thought of a cute name for a little girl: "LaRue" (accent on the 2nd syllable). It's a French surname for someone who lives by a road, path or track, but also pronounced the same as/spelled differently from the word in my native language meaning "to play". DH & I have always thought that if we have a baby girl, we'd name her "Ruby Louella" or "Ruby Lou" for short. I think I'll run "Ruby LaRue" by him tonight. With hubby's unpronounceable French last name, her name could be quite the hilarious tongue-twister.

    I think we'd be at a loss for a boy's name. We gave both our favorites to Bodhi for his first and middle names.
    I really hate to point this out, but Ruby LaRue just makes me think of Pepé LePew. Sorry. I have been meaning to ask, though - is the double L in your husband's last name pronounced or silent? French is totally inconsistent with that. Then add on names that become Americanized, and it's a nightmare.

    Question - would any of you computer people in here be able to help me install specialized international phonetic alphabet characters on my mac? I found a page that had step-by-step directions and attempted to follow them and just couldn't make headway, which almost never happens. For some reason, I just can't figure this one out.
    Last edited by Gwenn; 08-16-2012 at 07:03 PM.
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  21. #34461
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    Mandy, I'd love to help but I'm really feeling sick and need to get in bed. What does the step say, exactly, that you can't figure out? Could it be that the directions are for a different version than what you have? Maybe they were written for Snow Leopard and you have Lion? Or something like that?

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  22. #34462
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    This is the link I was using. http://linguisticmystic.com/2007/03/...hensive-guide/

    I managed to get the font in my font library correctly, and was able to double-check because I can see the "charis" font as a font option when I open Word or Pages. On my PC at work, I basically stopped after that step and use Insert/Symbol to get to the IPA characters I need not part of the regular alphabet. On my mac, for some reason I can't find those characters under Insert/Symbol when using "charis" and apparently I need a special keyboard layout and list of shortcuts. Where I'm stuck is under the paragraph "Installing the Layout." I'm running Lion, and looking at the instructions he lists for Lion, and I can't locate the library on my computer even after following the directions to unhide it.
    Last edited by Gwenn; 08-16-2012 at 10:02 PM.
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  23. #34463

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    Omgomgomg. I took a shower last night and on our tub, which is very old, is a sliding glass shower door. On the bottome of the door, where it's attached (was attached) to the tub, it is not sealed and it looks gross. I have gone at it with a toothbrush before but you just can't get to where it's gross. I've told dbf several times that I'd love to take those doors off, along with the frame and clean under there but he blows me off.
    So. I'm in the shower and I'm looking at the grossness and seeing little brown pieces floating around in the water that has accumulated on the inner edge of the tub. Then I'm like, "wait. Did that just move?" So I turn off the water and sure enough it's a tiny brown worm. A whole bunch of em. I freaked out. The kids were all in bed and I called dbf in to show him. He was like, "I'll take the door off this weekend."
    Ummm. Like hell. The door comes off now and you do it or I'll do it. He was not happy but I wouldn't relent so he took it off and I scrubbed the shiz out of it all. But it stlll looks dirty and I don't want him putting the door back on although he says he'll seal it all up really well so that won't happen again.
    *SHUDDER* I've been feeling all night like bug are crawling on me.

  24. #34464
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    Oh god Bridget!! Did you scream? I think I might have. Ick ick ick!!!

    Mandy, I had to help someone else get fonts on her Mac a couple months ago because it wasn't working as it should. I know I found another Fonts folder and stuck them in there and it worked, but for the life of me I cannot remember where it was. Maybe under System? I have a Mac at work but it's running Snow Leopard so I can't try to find it again myself right now, but I'd be willing to poke through mine at home (also runs Lion). If I can see the file structure, it might come back to me. I remember it was quite the pain and I spent considerable time on it, but it was the same thing. We were trying to install fonts she'd bought and putting them in the Font folder they listed didn't do the trick. There is definitely a 2nd one on Lion.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  25. #34465
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    Mandy, try to find /System/Library/Fonts/

    See if sticking them in there make those fonts work. You may have to restart your computer.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  26. #34466

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    I am not really a screamer. I quietly walked out to the living room with my towel wrapped around me and said, "Can you come here please? I have to show you something."
    The look on his face but quite like it would have been had I screamed though! lol He's like, "Wha???"

    On a more pleasant note he found a bow window for our living room that we are all very excited about. Our current living room window grows frost on the inside in the winter! Plus, I just love bow windows and have always wanted one. I think we are going to try to put it in this weekend. And when I say "we", I mean not me at all.

    Where is Christine?

  27. #34467
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    Bridget, that was soooo not what I wanted to read about first thing in the morning. *shudder*


  28. #34468

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    Bridget that would have freaked me out!!! Do you know what the worms were?

    Erin

  29. #34469

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    After today's research, which has my skin crawling, I believe they are drain fly larvae. They ususally lay their eggs inside a slimy drain but the environment created under that door was just as a slimy drain would be. At least they are harmless and easy to control. But still. Gag.

  30. #34470

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    Cool about the bow window!! Mech --- about the larvae. Glad your kids didn't want to keep them as pets.

    Mandy, Ruby LaRue is starting to sound more and more like a stripper name to me. But, mais non! I deed not ketch ze Pepe LePew similarity until you pointed it out, mon ami.

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