Katy, . I'm so sorry that such a sad and disturbing event had to happen to you and your loved ones this week. I would have made the exact same decision that you did, keeping J away from the center of it all. Everyone needs to process grief in their own way. I can totally see why your MIL would want to have family near her to help process it, but I also hope she'll understand your reasoning, which makes perfect sense to me.