Long and stressful day today. ********WARNING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!This involves death, so please don't read any further if it bothers you. ********* Got a call at 8:30 from my dh, who is traveling out of town for his job. He was choking back tears and told me that his uncle killed himself. Not a blood uncle, but as close as you can get. A neighbor who DH has known since he was tiny. It was a shock and not what I could have envisioned for him. Apparently he had been very depressed for a couple of weeks about a diagnosis of dementia. He didn't want to be a burden on him family. So last night he got up from bed at about 10, told his wife "Mary, I'm going to go kill myself." She called my in-laws and 911, but by the time my FIL got over there, W had gone out to the shed, loaded a shotgun, sat down outside against the wall and pulled the trigger. My poor FIL did CPR until the ambulance got there. Then the body had to stay there on the ground until the ME could declare it a suicide and apparently it took hours and hours, so everyone saw the scene (W's kids and grandkids and anyone else driving by). Just awful. I just found tonight out about the dementia diagnosis, and that for some reason really helps because now I know that he had a good reason in his own mind why he was doing it. But it is still so sad and awful to think about. My MIL was demanding that she have all her family there with her because she was so upset. At first I was trying to figure out a way to get there, trying to get a pet sitter for my cat, etc. but after about an hour of thinking about it I realized that the last place I want to take J is a place where she will more than likely overhear a conversation about a guy shooting himself in the head, etc. So DH will stay in Dallas until Sunday evening and we will have to go back another weekend in June. It does make me sad that W won't be there. He was a pretty interesting guy - so lively and a forceful strong personality. We were completely on opposite sides politically but I really enjoyed talking with him about his woodworking projects. He was the only person who I have ever heard say without irony or raised eyebrow: "Want a snort?" while holding out a gigantic tumbler of whisky rocks. My dh and I used to giggle about that, but he said it every time we were at his house. I don't know how his wife will do without him. She had a stroke about three years ago and he was just devoted to her. Sad.
"Any idiot can face a crisis; it is this day-to-day living that wears you out." -Anton Chekhov