DH and I have had arguments occasionally about my online time - I have been known to be surreptitiously checking my phone for a response while DH was talking to me and then subjected myself to a lengthy rant about how I never pay attention to him. Admittedly guilty in that situation and I would have been upset, too, if he had done that to me. But the passive-agressive note-leaving would NOT fly with me, and so long as your children were cared for and the house isn't on fire, I honestly don't see that it is any of his business HOW you spend your time. Even if the house is messy. I agree, I'm very much live and let live in that department.
We do have an imbalance of power around here, as well. I work full time and DH does his National Guard one weekend a month, and is taking a couple of classes at the local community college (another sore point as he has withrawn from the same class two semesters in a row now without completing the class but past the deadline to drop the course and get a refund. And who is paying for this? cough, cough). I expect him to cook and he cleans as well, although we are messy. I feel caught between this societal double standard where I, as of course the wife with a messy home, should be cleaning more so I have a spotless home (ick) but then at the same time, what is he doing all day? Not working, and apparently not doing enough to keep up with his class, either. I told G at work today that I can't decide if I have ridiculously high expectations of him, or if I am entirely too forgiving. I just don't know what the answer is.
I actually had a freak-out moment today because I got a message on my phone letting me know that my apple ID had been used to order a movie (The Matrix) on a device that had never been associated with a purchase for this account before. I flew into a panic, changed my password, and was trying to go online from my phone to figure out how to dispute the charge. I was at work, too, and really shouldn't have been dealing with personal issues so eventually I texted DH and told him to go online and figure out how to get the charge removed. He replied back that he had ordered it (from our apple TV, which is set up with my account) and was watching it as I texted. Told G the whole story and she asked if I was okay with the fact that my DH was watching The Matrix at 10:30 on a Tuesday morning on my dime while I worked. Honestly, this has become so normalized for us, my mind didn't even go in that direction until she pointed it out. And I know DH was home sick with a cold today (same cold I had last week) so I'm sure he was feeling crappy. But she has a point. I just don't know what to make of it all anymore.
Myles, two words. Splinter skills. There you go.
I am fuming mad at this neurologist. He made the most idiotic mistake (seriously, major textbook rookie mistake, for a doctor who has been working in this city for 30 years or more) of diagnosing a child with COGNITIVE IMPAIRMENT (read: mental retardation) without testing him. Wrote a lengthy report of how this kid is academically behind and it is due to a cognitive impairment which is likely genetic in nature. Okay - yes, the kid can't count past two (he's in preschool, not even in kinder yet). After G and I spent two hours testing him with every test known to man, we determined that he has AVERAGE cognitive skills and difficulty with auditory processing and sequences. Such as remembering strings of numbers or reciting the alphabet. He can identify quantities ("That's three" when seeing three blocks) even though he can't count to three, and he can copy complex visual patterns, and other reasoning and problem-solving tasks. In other words, he has a language disorder and is cognitively normal. Any doctor, especially a neurologist, should know better than to tell a parent her child is mentally retarded if he hasn't ruled out a language disorder. Idiot, idiot, idiot. I feel like reporting him for malpractice. Did the doctor test his language skills? No, of course he has no idea how to do that. And no mention of language or auditory processing in his report. But a "prescription" that we give him an IEP to receive special education and also give him speech therapy to support that.
So there, doctor - kid DID NOT QUALIFY for pre-academics. Because he is cognitively normal. It's his language!!!! Sorry. Idiot. He should seriously know better.
Did I mention he should know better?
Suja, big . I'm thinking of you and Pan.
Last edited by Gwenn; 04-23-2013 at 06:04 PM.
Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12