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Thread: Secular Confessions

  1. #40291

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    That's so sad about all the schools closing... You are so right, the ones that need it most are the ones that don't get it. It takes money to get services, and if you don't have money, you don't get anything! It's a vicious cycle. My dad used to work for a public school system, and he has watched (and relayed to me) this whole cycle, getting worse and worse all the time. I would say that I don't know how they stay afloat- but they didn't. The city school was bought out by the state quite a while ago. You all will be completely shocked to hear that the state really isn't doing much better!

    Mandy, do you think there's any chance the mom told that kid to not say anything? Maybe she knows he doesn't qualify, but wants him in for some reason? Free day care? Munchausans? That's so odd... As for a 2 year old needing to be translated... That was my 2 year old! Very few people (including Daddy) understood her enough to not need me to translate. Even now at 3 a lot of people don't understand her. I've even noticed that her really sweet, experienced preschool teacher only gets about 60% of what she says... She has, from what I can tell, pretty decent language skills, just horrible pronunciation...

    Myles, that is great about your accountant! I've been using the same one FOREVER. In fact, my parents used her before they had me... And yet, there was an error in our 2012 taxes, so the IRS sent us a notice to pay. I sent it to her, and she said she took care of it. SHE DID NOT. Now it's due like NOW and I'm in panic mode because she blew us off. I'm so irritated!!

    Aw, Chrissy, that's sweet of you to stick with the volunteering! I'm like you, I am NOT a morning person. In fact, I'm debating putting Maiya in the next level up of preschool next quarter because it STARTS at 8 AM. 8 AM!! And it's across town, at rush hour, so we would literally have to leave the house about 7... Maiya wakes up between 8 and 9 most days! And I'm not usually up much before her, hah. So I feel ya...

    And yeah, I wish Maiya would sleep with me, too... She DOES NOT sleep AT ALL if I'm in the same room as her. We've tried many times, and she never even doses off... And to think, this is the girl that used to not sleep AT ALL unless she was somehow touching me! Preferably on the boob... What a complete 180!

    L, I'm so sorry to hear things have been so rough!! Glad you at least got some down time at Maiya's party. We can set up a regular play date for Maiya and S, if you promise me that you'll just sit on your butt and relax! I know, you drop him off at my house, then you can go hang out at the local star bucks and read for a bit. Or go watch TV at my parents' house. Or go feed ducks at the lake! Hope you find some way to take a load off regularly, sounds like you need it.



  2. #40292

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    Mandy, I would SO consider it! I'd need a ton more details before deciding, of course, but it sounds like it's right up my worth-considering ally!



  3. #40293

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    Quote Originally Posted by daylilies View Post
    Those links...I'm going to pass on the eel story too. I did see the one about the ferrets and it made me LOL. They don't even look like dogs! Did you guys see the one about the dog that was shaved to look like a lion? People thought it actually was a lion, except it's cub sized and it has a full grown lion's mane, so...
    Did it look kinda like this?



    This is posted on FB under the caption "My husband gets bored when I leave town with the baby."

    I think I sleep a little better on some nights when I'm in Bodhi's bed.

    Oy, Chrissy - that's quite a commitment! I'll bet Connor will remember you were always there, though.

    Mandy, it may be beautiful, but I imagine you'll come across a lot of heartbreak living at the reservation. Are you ready for that much emotional investment?

  4. #40294

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    Quote Originally Posted by Krystal5 View Post
    Myles, that is great about your accountant! I've been using the same one FOREVER. In fact, my parents used her before they had me... And yet, there was an error in our 2012 taxes, so the IRS sent us a notice to pay. I sent it to her, and she said she took care of it. SHE DID NOT. Now it's due like NOW and I'm in panic mode because she blew us off. I'm so irritated!!
    Ooooooooh. That's not cool! She MUST be fired.

  5. #40295
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    Janet, about that mom, no chance. She seemed so embarrassed and frustrated. Even if I did suspect her of being up to no good, though, I don't think I know a single two-year-old who could refuse to talk for over an hour despite us really trying hard to engage him just because his mother told him not to talk. I'm just WAY too much fun, at least to a two-year-old!

    And about the reservation - I'll share the website with you privately. It looks awesome. And they have "teacher housing" rentals on the res (crappy mobile homes, admittedly) for like a couple of hundred dollars a month. That pretty well makes up for the cut in pay! LOL!
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  6. #40296
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    Myles, I come across a lot of heartbreak NOW! Seriously, but working where I work I see so much tragedy. I know there are all sorts of negatives but I see them now, too. Hard to say, though.

    Love the dog pic! I saw that lion dog thing, too, and your dog actually does look quite similar.
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  7. #40297

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    I thought you might find the level of heartbreak comparable, Mandy. I know you love your job very much and the amount of passion you have for it is awe-inspiring. Do you ever worry, though, that all the sad stories you encounter day after day are taking too much of a toll on you? I know you're making a genuine difference in the lives of other people, and that must be among the most fulfilling experiences in the world. But are you taking any measures to stay ... buoyant ... in the face of all the frustration and tragedy?

    If you need me to make a clown of myself to add a little levity to your day, I think I'm well suited for the job.

  8. #40298
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    At the moment, I am not feeling particularly buoyant, no. Thanks for thinking of me, though. You girls always brighten my day.
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  9. #40299

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    Quote Originally Posted by Gwenn View Post
    At the moment, I am not feeling particularly buoyant, no. Thanks for thinking of me, though. You girls always brighten my day.
    I know it sounds silly, but I was talking more about making it part of your regular routine to do something totally just for yourself, something you might even call "frivolous", mainly to counterbalance all the heavy stuff you see each day and own your own happiness. That is, if we're not frivolity enough for you.

  10. #40300
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    I have a friend who is a social worker and her workplace requires them to see a psychiatrist every so often because they see such horrific things. Does your work not provide anything like that, Mandy?

    Myles, the picture of the dog made me laugh. Speaking of dogs, I keep seeing chihuahuas everywhere I go, and it makes me want one so bad! I had a chihuahua for 17 years before moving to England and I miss her so much. Travis is desperate for a pet, and I would love to just say yes to him. The problem is that we both work full time, so it doesn't feel like we'd give any pet the proper attention it would need since we're all out of the house from 7am til 5 pm. Do you ladies with pets think that it's possible to have a pet and work full time?

  11. #40301
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gwenn View Post
    So...would I be insane to apply for a job on the Apache reservation? It would mean a move. To a reservation. Like, a real one. And a pay cut.

    Balanced against one of the most beautiful areas in the state, snow, and a much lower cost of living. And a much more laid back way of life!

    Would anyone consider that?
    I think you should apply for it and if you get interviewed and get the sense that an offer would become a very likely possibility, research research research! You can always say no at the end if you come across a bit of information that you know you couldn't live happily with.

    Quote Originally Posted by demigraf View Post
    I know it sounds silly, but I was talking more about making it part of your regular routine to do something totally just for yourself, something you might even call "frivolous", mainly to counterbalance all the heavy stuff you see each day and own your own happiness. That is, if we're not frivolity enough for you.
    Yes, like take a random day off from work to meet up with a fellow APAer. I have my final itinerary down for my trip and unfortunately I won't be in Phoenix and available on a Friday after all. But I'll really be heartbroken if I can't squeeze a visit in with you somehow!

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  12. #40302

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    More like this...

  13. #40303

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    Mandy, I'd totally consider it if they had electricity and wifi.

    And real bathrooms.
    Last edited by daylilies; 04-11-2013 at 07:54 AM.

  14. #40304
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    Quote Originally Posted by daylilies View Post
    More like this...

    Awww!!! That is cute!

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  15. #40305
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    Quote Originally Posted by AmeriBrit View Post
    The problem is that we both work full time, so it doesn't feel like we'd give any pet the proper attention it would need since we're all out of the house from 7am til 5 pm. Do you ladies with pets think that it's possible to have a pet and work full time?
    Ash, it would be possible to make that work. But, keep in mind that it would mean you have to get up extra early to take the dog out, rush home to take him out, possibly find someone to walk the dog around noon, and might cut into your other (outside) activities. And people on the other side of the pond tend to be quite reluctant about owning pets in a two worker home; it's cultural, I think.

    Shelters in the US are overrun with Chis. It's good that you don't have that problem there.

    Totally off on a tangent. When I buy things from Amazon, I sometimes get like a $ or two credit towards downloading MP3s, which I don't take advantage of, because I don't listen to music in that format anyway, and can't be bothered to look for stuff. Anyway, do you think I can give the credit to someone, or otherwise download it for someone else? I hate to see it wasted.
    Last edited by Suja; 04-11-2013 at 08:11 AM.

  16. #40306
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    I think that it's possible to work and have pets. Most people I know that have pets work full-time. The only problem really is if you got a puppy. THAT is hard to do unless you have someone at home most of the time. Though if you are off the summer, could get one at the beginning and at least get potty training out of the way. If you went smaller dog, you could train them to use a litter box. This is the litter we buy. http://www.doglitter.com/ It's great but not so much if the dog is much bigger than mine...they are 25 and 33 lbs but the 33 lbs mostly goes outside. DH has to change it every few days now because Molly just pees too much. Both girls ended up generally peeing in the exact same spot so he dishes out the wet and moves the other litter into it and puts the new in the back. The litter is so handy though....they don't HAVE to go out in yucky weather. Cosmo can go when she wants even if we are not home....Molly is still kenneled when we aren't home for now. Both of them sometimes get up and go potty in the middle of the night.
    Or the other thing would be to get a little older dog that can go in the morning and than at night soon as you get home from work.
    You live next to your inlaws, right? Maybe they would be willing to do a bathroom break mid-day?

    Mandy I would consider it too. Lower cost of living makes up for a LOT. Long as the housing would allow your furry babies, it wouldn't hurt to consider it. How far is that from your parents? Might be nice to get some distance from them a little.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  17. #40307
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    It really depends on the breed too Ashley. Some dogs are more attention needy than others. It's the same for parrots...when I was researching them, I learned that Eclectus parrots tolerate being alone for 8-9 hours better than other types of parrots do. That was one of the big reasons we chose to get a Solomon Island Eclectus. No one wants a depressed parrot.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  18. #40308
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    Good point Chrissy. I mean Molly is only 1.5 yrs old but the beagle in her leaves her pretty laid back and chill. She sleeps with me all night, is up for maybe 2 hours in the am, sleeps a good chunk of the day with her daddy, is awake when I get home and is active for maybe two hours, naps for an hour or two at night, up for another 30-60 minutes and then is down for the night with me again. She has moments of activity but REALLY loves to snuggle on my lap or on the couch with me....or sleeping in the bed or in her house. Some playtime each day is enough for her.....she is just happy to relax by the fire and watch that or play with her toys.


    Chrissy....did you try the cranberry vodka slushie?

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  19. #40309

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    Quote Originally Posted by daylilies View Post
    More like this...
    That dog looked way more stoked on its haircut than Lulu did. I wub doggie smiles!!!

  20. #40310

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    I think if you got a breed that didn't need a lot of exercise it would be feasible. But you'd still probably want someone to come let him out to pee at least once while you're gone. We really hesitate to leave Bo alone for more than 4 hours or so.

  21. #40311
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    That "lion dog" is awesome. I remember seeing the video and could see how someone who was half asleep might see a lion instead of a dog. LOL

    Cosmo has an great smile. And it comes out just when it should and she has a reason to smile. We think that she has a sense of humor and likes to play games and when she busts out the smile it looks like she is chuckling. So we started called her chuckles and eventually Chuckie or Chuckmo.
    Molly is funny and we laugh at her more but she doesn't have the sneaky game playing trickster side that Cosmo does.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  22. #40312
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    Ash, I agree it depends on the breed. You are on a teacher schedule, so if you get a puppy, get it at the beginning of your summer break and housetrain over the summer. By the time work rolls around again he should be a little more ready to go (especially if you can get your ILs to let it out in the yard for a break at lunchtime). Otherwise, I would get an older dog who is already housetrained.

    I mentioned the Apache reservation to G today. She didn't think I was crazy. She said doing various teacher developments, she has met a number of people who worked there. They all seemed happy. The drawback is that there is a lot of distance between the schools so I might be driving a l-o-n-g way.

    The Apache reservation is about 5 hours from my parents. It's up in the mountains and there is a lot of tourism in the area. I went camping and fishing there as a teen. Beautiful, cool summers and pine forest. Also the ubiquitous casinos on the reservation. So I guess if I ever got a hankering for fine dining there would be somewhere to go. And yes, they have plumbing and electricity and stuff. At least in the schools and the "teacher housing area." It's quite possible many of the locals live without some of those things. I know there are parts of the Navajo reservation with no electricity or plumbing, at least there were in the 90s. You can't buy property on the reservation if you don't belong to the tribe, so you can rent in the designated housing area, or live in the town nearby off the res.
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  23. #40313
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    Chrissy, will you be in Phoenix at all? When? It's 100 miles away so it's not the easiest thing for me to get up there, but let me know what your schedule is like.
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  24. #40314
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    What does your DH think of the idea? He likes more outdoors things, right? I know a number of our staff drive between our locations on a regular basis and many of them use the time to listen to audio books. Not my thing but boy do some people love them.

    I'm five hours from my family. I would prefer 3 hours but 5 isn't bad. It's far enough that we don't feel obligated to come down to things we don't want to....but close enough that it's easy to visit on a 3 day weekend.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  25. #40315
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    Oh, he actually suggested that I look up there and I told him no. Then I was searching the job listings nationally and this job was advertised. I think he would be more excited about it than I would.

    You guys - I just made a completely ridiculous (and embarassing) mistake at work. I write my reports in a word document, then I copy and paste them into our computer database. I refuse to write the document in the database because we had all kinds of issues with editing and the computer timing out and losing all our data. Anyway - in a meeting with a parent, I went to present my portion of the report and it WASN'T THERE. I copy different pieces over in different sections. Instead of copy and then paste, I hit paste and then paste. So not only did I copy the same data into the database twice - I overwrote my original word document, saved it, and closed the document without noticing it. All my work is GONE! And it was the "meat" of the report, where I actually discuss what I did and how the child performed. I looked like a total idiot in front of this parent, and now I have to re-do all that work. Which I don't have time to do. I have never done anything like this before! Ugh!
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  26. #40316
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    If you've never done that before, Mandy, you're pretty much ahead of 99% of the population. Cut yourself some slack; you're human (I know, shocking!).

  27. #40317

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    What a bummer, Mandy. I hope the parent was understanding of things. I can't tell you how many times I've lost track of different document versions I'm working on and overwritten the latest work. I hope the reconstruction of the report goes quickly!

  28. #40318
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    Mandy, I know that really sucks the big one. We've all done it though and it almost always happens in situations that maximize on our embarrassment

    Quote Originally Posted by Cosmosmom View Post
    Chrissy....did you try the cranberry vodka slushie?
    I did. And Christen did. And they are yummy!!! So good in fact, I'm not sure I'm going to be able to make any other kind of vodka slushy to try out because I don't want to waste an opportunity to have a drink I know I'm gonna like. Yum!

    Quote Originally Posted by Gwenn View Post
    Chrissy, will you be in Phoenix at all? When? It's 100 miles away so it's not the easiest thing for me to get up there, but let me know what your schedule is like.
    I will be, but the only day I'll be there without anything already planned with be May 7th. I'm flying in late the 6th, and then on the 8th ShannonG & I are heading up to Pagosa Springs to be with sandersmommy. She offered to let me use her car on the 7th, but from the 8-13th I'm going to be traveling every day. I'm not sure adding 200 miles would be wise.

    Any possibility we could meet somewhere 1/2 way? Is there anything in between besides a cactus?

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  29. #40319
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    Well, there's Casa Grande ... Trust me, nobody wants to fly across a continent to see Casa Grande. Actually, 20 years ago it was just cactus. Now there's an outlet mall and several housing developments. It's kind of a stop on the road, pretty much. Although it's grown a lot! I don't think there's anything there besides houses, though. I think people who live there commute. And I can't imagine why you would move to Casa Grande to commute somewhere else. LOL!

    In other words, lets's not do that. Either way, I'll need to rent a car. Halfway or all the way doesn't make much difference beyond that. I need very, very clear directions to deal with driving on Phoenix, though. There's only a small part of the city I know at all. And I don't like to not know where I am!

    Are you sure that will be the day? I can take it off work if you're sure. Not feeling like worrying g about that right now.
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  30. #40320
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    I'm sure it's the 7th, but I did just send Shannon (yet another) email for her to verify. I'm 99.9% sure it's the 7th. I'm definitely flying into Phoenix on the 6th and staying there. She's not taking the 7th off of work, and I have no plans for the entire day.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


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