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Thread: Secular Confessions

  1. #37951

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    I know. I haven't been able to stop thinking about him posting them and wondering how he could think like that. I knew that our politics were very different but we've always gotten along really well. We are the same age and grew up as buddies so I really love him. Just keep going back to how I just saw him a few weeks ago and we had a great time so I'm trying to hold onto that memory and not the stupid fb post.

  2. #37952
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    "FOX is the only place that has the courage to address what the other networks avoid when it comes to Obama, the Entertainment Industry, and other liberal bastions. MSNBC is about as trustworthy as a rattlesnake."

    Quote from a friend of a friend (who was complaining about the biased coverage on MSNBC).

  3. #37953

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    I laugh at the nutty posts on FB most of the time when I see them. Luckily there aren't too many. I have a guy that is going on and on about how the Newtown shooting was a conspiracy and that it either 1- never occurred and was fabricated by the government or 2-occurred but on a much smaller scale but is being blown up because Obama and "liberals" want to "take our guns." lol. The bad thing is my DH is, what I consider somewhat naive, and he was watching some videos about the conspiracy and then questioning me about if I thought the videos were true, then being mad that I wouldn't consider them to be true. FWIW, I believe a lot of things about our government that people see as big conspiracies, but I just won't believe that people are faking the deaths of children and educators, that is just sick to me.

    Sorry haven't had time to check in often. Bridget sorry you had to deal with that lady being a butthead over Sawyer's weight. FWIW, Elle was 20lbs at 2 years old as well. She was little but has really shot up recently. She went up to 30lbs recently and even past that on some days and has grown about 4 inches since she was 2 so is a normal size 4 year old, when at 2 she was considered below average for height and weight. Last time I weighed her she was 33 lbs. I know some 5 year olds who are only 35lbs, while Ky was 32lbs at 12 months so everyone comes in different sizes.

    Erin

  4. #37954
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    Those conspiracy theories are driving me the most nuts I think. They're the craziest of the crazies (those that believe that). Talk about wanting to live in denial with their heads buried in the sand. And how disrespectful to the grieving families. I cannot fathom how I'd feel to be one of the family members that lost someone and have to read about that crap. I think it would anger me enough that I'd be tempted to buy a gun of my own. Just to wave it at them and scream like a lunatic, of course. I doubt I could ever actually shoot a person.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  5. #37955

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    Really polarizing topics are kind of helpful to suss out the crazies on one's friend list. You just learn a lot about people from their rhetoric. Like with your co-worker, Faye. I would just be scratching my head if one of my friends posted one of those stupid comparisons to Hitler. I know you love her, and I’m sure she’s got a lot of positives, but seeing that would totally diminish her in my eyes, not even because of her position (I believe there are valid points to be made on both sides of the debate, though you guys know where I tend to fall on the issue) but because of the ham-handed way it was expressed.

    Shelley, hooray for a good first day on the job!!

    Bridget, that woman was out of line. I hope there’s more than one person who works there, so you don’t have to deal with her again. She was just obnoxious. I wonder what would happen in a situation like that if you just smiled and told her, “Thanks, but you’re being a little obnoxious.” I have never said anything so bluntly to an obnoxious person, but I’ve been tempted to. I know sometimes I blurt out a lot of confrontational things to strangers when I’m feeling particularly indignant about something, but never just call someone out when they’re overstepping conversational boundaries like she was doing. My guess is that it’d shut that person up from the shock of being called to the mat like that. I think I’m going to rehearse the line in front of the mirror, so the next time I have an occasion to use it, it’ll roll smoothly off the tongue. LOL. Sawyer never struck me as unusually small for his age. Are your really concerned about it, Bridget?

    Speaking of confrontation, most of you guys know what’s going on with my sister. I really gave it to her yesterday… she got so ridiculous that I started to feel stupid for even engaging her. She’d start off by texting me, I would respond with exactly what I thought about her lying and wrecking a home with small children in it. Then she’d act self-righteously wounded, tell me she was too hurt to even read my texts and that she was going to delete them and please leave her alone. Then some time would go by, and she’d text me AGAIN. I’d respond bluntly again. Same thing from her: “You’re being so hurtful. I’m not reading your texts (but here’s a response to something you said to show I did read them) please leave me alone, you big meanie!” Hours go by. Then texts AGAIN, this time, bringing her HUSBAND up – y’know, the guy she cheated on - saying he supports her and he thinks I’m a “bad sister”. He was amazed at how badly we treated her 2 years ago, when we were defending him. Honestly, I didn’t believe her, but I actually got a voicemail from him this morning asking me to stay out of things while they sorted things out.

    To be fair, she’s driving my parents home today, so we don’t want her driving upset, or for the whole car ride to be this big drama. But I had no plans to bring them into things, and I’m pretty offended that he was talking to me on the voicemail as though I was instigating/meddling in some way. He said a few other things, like how she’s not the only villain, so maybe he was alluding to him being equally dishonest about something with her. Maybe he cheated too. Who knows. Anyway, my response: “Hi C. Sorry all this is happening. I’m not sure exactly what M has been telling you about our exchange, but please consider that there may be some distortion of truth coming from her. Rest assured, Steve and I have been able to keep this “contained” (his words) for 2 years, so you don’t have to worry about us broadcasting anything now. Any words I’ve said to her have been in response to discussion she initiated, not me trying to start something. M says you think I’m a bad sister. I don’t even know why she brought that up, but I’m giving you the benefit of the doubt that it was said in a non-malicious context. I just want to get on with my kid’s birthday party, so I’m happy to leave you guys to it. Good luck to you, sincerely."

    That was 2 hours ago, and I’m still a little upset about it right now, mainly from feeling totally misunderstood and unappreciated for defending BIL all this time. However, I’m starting to feel relieved that we can just walk away from their drama, even with things left unsaid, and it won't make much of a difference for us either way. There’s a chance that text might be the last thing he ever hears from me, and I’m ok with him never hearing our version of events directly from us EVER. If it’s true that he thinks we were silly for turning on my sister on his behalf, maybe we weren’t really doing it for him all along, but just for ourselves and our sense of right and wrong. Steve & I were very clear and never disagreed on what we had to do under those circumstances (moving out of the house we were renting from them, not telling any mutual friends anything we knew) so if anything, maybe her whole affair was a bonding exercise for my marriage.

    DH & I did have some early morning “fun time” at 5 am, maybe out of solidarity on this whole matter, and I have to just tell you… it is so cool when you’re wearing fleece in the dark and as you’re peeling off the layers, the static electricity makes the prettiest little sparks. LOL.
    Last edited by demigraf; 01-18-2013 at 12:53 PM.

  6. #37956

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    That was a great response to him, Myles. You defended yourself very well without malice or defensiveness. Wtf with him sending that in the first place. Clearly he is working with blinders here. I hope you take comfort in the very sound choice you made to remove yourself from the whole thing when you left that house. Regardless of her ex's response to her betrayal, it would have eaten you guys up inside.

    People are so strange and I have given up trying to understand most of them.

    Oh, and I as m not overly concerned about Sawyer's size but her comments were a bit unsettling.

  7. #37957

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    Thanks, B! Yeah, I never heard you saying anything out of concern for Sawyer's size, so I think she was just getting all up in your business.

  8. #37958
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    I'm really confused about why your sister or her husband are dragging you into it. Whatever happened between them is between them. They should try to keep it that way. You were right to move out. I hope they leave you alone in the whole thing.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  9. #37959

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    My latest 3 texts from my sister: "Since for some reason you think you need to stay involved in some way, I am forwarding all correspondences from two years ago related to this topic to C including my therapist comments. Not certain why you think they paint you in a good or revelatory light or why C wants to be contacted by you. I do not want you to be derailed from what you need to focus on for the weekend unless it helps you to send them too. If it helps you in any way, please do."

    "I am leaving with mom and dad now. Please only contact me regarding them. The reason I don't read your texts (see only a smidgeon of your diatribes as I delete) is so that I can keep some semblance of good thoughts about you in my mind."

    "I do know C initiated the call, but only to tell you to stay out of it."


    My response: "C called me. I responded. Shut up already." <--- Yep, I have resorted to that tone with her.

    I'm not clear on why she thinks I want/need to send our old e-mails to her husband. Very weird. I want them to both just go away!!!! Yaaaargh!! This is so dang frustrating!!!

    BTW, I tried to block her number from texting me. I even called AT&T to sign up for "SmartList" service, but it doesn't work on an iPhone, and I would have to jailbreak mine and download a $15 app called iBlacklist if I want to block her. Just might do that.
    Last edited by demigraf; 01-18-2013 at 02:03 PM.

  10. #37960

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    I am annoyed at her just reading that. If I was living it, I'd be irate.

  11. #37961
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    Yikes on the drama. Hopefully the last one gets the message across to keep you out of it!
    I was thinking about it and I don't really know anyone who has cheated IRL that I know of...minus MIL's second husband (he was arrested for trying to hire a hooker for a bj...cept hooker was a cop LOL.....didn't tell MIL and oops I found out about it a few years later....was just looking up everyone I knew in the court database for fun. I told DH (well we had just gotten engaged)....and left it up to him to tell her. I thought maybe she knew and forgave or maybe not. Turns out not and that is when she kicked him to the curb. She hated him anyway but that was the final straw that pushed to take that step).

    I don't kow what happened but in five weeks Cosmo supposedly lost.... only .2 of a freaking pound. I swore it was going be more like 3-5 lbs. her harness was looser and I can feel the fatty lipomas on her belly much easier now. She is jumping up a little better and running more and eating less. Even both of us feel that she is lighter when we pick her up. But the good news is that the thyroid pills have certainly helped her be more alert and spunky again.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  12. #37962
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cosmosmom View Post
    I don't kow what happened but in five weeks Cosmo supposedly lost.... only .2 of a freaking pound. I swore it was going be more like 3-5 lbs. her harness was looser and I can feel the fatty lipomas on her belly much easier now. She is jumping up a little better and running more and eating less. Even both of us feel that she is lighter when we pick her up. But the good news is that the thyroid pills have certainly helped her be more alert and spunky again.
    At least she's more active...that's the most important part.

    Myles, I am really struggling to understand why they're dragging you into this? It's between them! Does your sister expect some kind of validation?

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  13. #37963
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    Myles, I am so sorry for what they are putting you through. What an odd dynamic between them where somehow directing their anger at you is becoming a bonding experience for them!
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  14. #37964

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    Wow, Jennifer. That's an incredible story about your MIL!! How uncomfortable for you. Glad Cosmo's not losing too fast!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Gwenn View Post
    Myles, I am so sorry for what they are putting you through. What an odd dynamic between them where somehow directing their anger at you is becoming a bonding experience for them!
    yeah, that too. maybe you'll save their marriage?

    sorry to poke fun, I know it's not for you. but it's just weird how they're dragging you into it.

  16. #37966
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    Too many drama queens in the family, Myles. I hope you can just ignore all texts from her. Have you tried this? http://www.att.net/smartcontrols-Sma...rWireless#none (Details are here: http://www.brighthub.com/mobile/ipho...es/105581.aspx) Verizon offers the same thing for free, I believe.

  17. #37967
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    It does sound like they're trying to villafy (sp?) you, Myles, so that all their anger can be directed towards you.

    I am just doing some late night crash studying for my skills tests that I'm taking tomorrow.

  18. #37968
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    Quote Originally Posted by demigraf View Post
    Wow, Jennifer. That's an incredible story about your MIL!! How uncomfortable for you. Glad Cosmo's not losing too fast!
    It wasn't too bad really. Just didn't expect to find much on people I knew...just things like when I had a car accident and got a ticket....not trying to solicit! Worst part was DH was away at field camp for six weeks and I didn't want to tell him on the phone. So I just kept it to myself. I was hoping he would tell his mom but left it to him...he knew her so much better (today I would tell her myself but we are quite close now....this was like 13 years ago). Helps he was a major a****** anyway. Abusive. He was ok to my face mostly because I think he was scared of my dad.... But there was this one time he went off I heard because he thought I ate an entire huge pack of kraft american cheese. Because of course the fat girl had to have done it. Turns out HE took it out and stuck it in a drawer by accident. Like seriously WHO would eat like 32 slices of american cheese at once? LOL
    Everyone was kind of hoping he would croak but unfortunately she had to divorce him to get rid of him (and that screwed her over financially). He's the one we are hoping and I believe she can collect SS on after she divorces husband number 3.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  19. #37969
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    Good luck Ashley!

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  20. #37970

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    Quote Originally Posted by Suja View Post
    Too many drama queens in the family, Myles. I hope you can just ignore all texts from her. Have you tried this? http://www.att.net/smartcontrols-Sma...rWireless#none (Details are here: http://www.brighthub.com/mobile/ipho...es/105581.aspx) Verizon offers the same thing for free, I believe.
    The first link is the service I tried to add to my plan, but when I called them, I was told it didn't work for iPhones. The second link lets you configure a block list for e-mails, but not text messages. I haven't gotten any texts from anyone after that last exchange, but I know she'll have a hard time controlling herself. She is mentally ill, after all. Hope I can ignore them too, Suja. That's my goal now, but honestly, I took a different tact last night. Two years ago, ignoring her was the name of the game. I bit my tongue so much at that time. So yesterday, I unleashed, partly because I felt like I'd held back so much over the course of 2 years. Perhaps that's why her husband saw it as me harrassing her, but despite what he thinks, there wasn't a single exchange that I initiated. I simply responded and she didn't like what I had to say.

    Here's an example of my "harrassment", which was in response to her describing our disagreement as "polarized world views and differing belief systems":



    I told you guys I was harsh, but I had wanted to say that for so long. For 20+ years now, any time she did something that involved lying or hurting someone else and I vocally opposed it, she'd always explain it away as "different world views".

    I'll try to stop talking about this now. My head is way too focused on them, and I really just want Bodhi to have a nice party on Sunday. L & pepperlu will be there! Yay!

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    Good luck on your skills test, tomorrow, Ashley. You got all kindsa mad ones.
    Last edited by demigraf; 01-18-2013 at 04:34 PM.

  21. #37971

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    Quote Originally Posted by Cosmosmom View Post
    It wasn't too bad really. Just didn't expect to find much on people I knew...just things like when I had a car accident and got a ticket....not trying to solicit! Worst part was DH was away at field camp for six weeks and I didn't want to tell him on the phone. So I just kept it to myself. I was hoping he would tell his mom but left it to him...he knew her so much better (today I would tell her myself but we are quite close now....this was like 13 years ago). Helps he was a major a****** anyway. Abusive. He was ok to my face mostly because I think he was scared of my dad.... But there was this one time he went off I heard because he thought I ate an entire huge pack of kraft american cheese. Because of course the fat girl had to have done it. Turns out HE took it out and stuck it in a drawer by accident. Like seriously WHO would eat like 32 slices of american cheese at once? LOL
    Everyone was kind of hoping he would croak but unfortunately she had to divorce him to get rid of him (and that screwed her over financially). He's the one we are hoping and I believe she can collect SS on after she divorces husband number 3.
    OMG, what a giant dill! Wish you'd found that cheese so you coulda crammed it where the sun don't shine.

  22. #37972

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    Wow, Myles. I'm sorry. It reminds me a bit of that woman I had to deal with a week or so ago who freaked out when I told her that asking me to go over to a stranger's house to pick up something she missent was not okay. People like that make me crazy because they make me feel crazy and I'm not crazy, YOU are crazy, Crazy! Ugh how awful. It may be something you just have to ignore because neither one of them seems capable of seeing things outside of their bizarro world.

    Jennifer, sorry Cosmo hasn't lost weight.

    "Any idiot can face a crisis; it is this day-to-day living that wears you out." -Anton Chekhov


  23. #37973

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    Katy, when you shared that woman's response, I thought she sounded so much like my sister, it was uncanny! You're absolutely right. I feel totally crazy from it all. I'm trying to ignore all this. Trying. Obviously, it's still fresh. We'll sort out future Thanksgivings and other family get-togethers later I guess. Ugh.

  24. #37974
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    I'm so sorry you're having to deal with all this while planning B's birthday, Mylah. I can see where it would be really hard to ignore. I can't wait to see you on Sunday just because I'm looking forward to seeing you, but I kind of wish you didn't have the stress of planning a birthday party on top of everything else that's going on.

    I love the spark story!!!!

    When I lived in WY, the heat was on so much and there was so little humidity, pretty much everything caused sparks. It drove me crazy. I hated the feeling of my hair crawling around on my head all the time, and I carried fabric softeners around with me to rub on my clothes as needed just to get rid of the static feeling. It doesn't help that I love wearing fleece because I get cold so easily but I hate wearing so many layers that I can't bend my arms or legs.


  25. #37975
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    Myles, I grinned about the sparks. Good for you, woman!

    I passed both my skills tests today. There was an English one composed of spelling, comprehension, and proofreading. The math one was half mental math where I had to listen to a recording of some questions and had 18 seconds to answer and then interpreting information from different types of graphs. So, I do indeed gots the mad skillz! Lol

    We are off out now to celebrate by going to TGI Fridays!

  26. #37976
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    Go Ashley go! Great job!


    Um can I just say that I find it really cute that the CA ladies are wearing fleece. LOL I like fleece but rarely wear it because of the static it causes. Plus it's almost too warm. Mostly the biggest use we have for fleece is the doggies blankets. Molly has a fleece throw that goes in her kennel and she likes to drag it out and pull it around the house like she is Linus from the Peanuts. She will drag it over Cosmo until Cosmo grabs an end and plays tug of war with her.
    I bought this really cute red fleece knee length nightgown with penguins on it. I have been able to wear it twice but never to bed. And I keep my house at 65/66 degrees.

    Though I might use it when I come home from work Monday. Our HIGH Monday without any wind chill is supposed to be negative 2. Haven't seen a high that low in two years. I think I'm telling Cosmo she HAS to use the litter box....she mostly goes outside but that is just too cold I think.

    I think today we are taking our Christmas stuff down. Tomorrow we need to do a good deep cleaning. DH's mom is supposed to be coming on Thursday for the weekend long as the weather is ok for her to drive up.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  27. #37977
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    Way to go Ash!!!

    And oooo la la about the sparks Myles. I hope your sister and her husband just leave you alone. Whatever they got going on really isn't anyone else's business and they should just handle it among themselves.

    I left work 1/2 hour early yesterday and hit the bar. It felt good to just be silly and irresponsible. I was so buzzed that even after a 45 minute bus ride, I had to walk home. My car is on Front St and I'm feeling too lazy to go over and get it. But I have to. My mom is counting on me to take her shopping, and honestly I need to go buy some groceries myself. Ugh. Back to being responsible again.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


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    It must have been the weekend for 'trouble.' I learned that Friday night my brother was out with his buddy and they were going to a store to buy cigarettes for a chick (neither guy smokes) and they heard, "STOP!" and "FREEZE!" When they looked, they saw 1 guy running and the one police officer chasing after him. They happened to be closer to the guy than the officer was, so they took off after him. It was a convoluted mess and I'm not sure I have all the details, but it turned out there were 2 trying to outrun the police officer. Tim's buddy went after one, and he went after the other. One "bad guy" tried to climb the ladder to the roof of the local fire station and the officer went up after him. There was a 3rd guy and a car that another police officer (state trooper called in for backup) caught and they found a gun under the passenger seat of the car. The state police and sheriff's deputies all came in on it after the 3 were in custody and one was confused and pulled a gun on my brother.

    The way he tells the story makes me laugh. But I can't help but sorta shudder at the antics Tim seems to get himself into. I was just thinking I might go out with him and his friends again, but now I'm thinking probably not. Somehow he always finds the craziest stuff to get involved in and I'd rather just hear the stories after the fact than be involved in them. I did tell him that as long as he's running WITH the police, then it's all good. I don't want to hear about him being the one being chased by them.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  29. #37979
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    Man, Chrissy, I can definitely agree that it would give me the shudders to hear about those kind of antics, too, but I bet they could be told in a funny way, too. I have had my share of hair-raising moments, too, but mostly in my ill-spent youth. And my DH would be the first to say that some of it is in the story-telling, and a little exaggeration makes a story sound more compelling but not exactly completely, shall we say, unbiased and printable as a reliable nonfiction account (that's for my stories, not for Dr. Exacto-Factual).

    Speaking of compelling, we had a wonderful time at Mylah's party today! I was a little worried because DH is now saying he has broken a rib from coughing too much, and cannot move very well or breathe deeply or pick up the kids, and he's been very cranky, and he says his chest hurts more than his ankle, but I gave him a big pep talk before the party and told him we should try to let the kids just BE unless there was crying or injury and not micromanage them, and he should try to talk to adults and enjoy himself. The food was awesome, the kids were well-behaved, S. was pretty good (he's been in underwear for about two weeks now so I'm having to hover around him a bit about that), and DH actually managed to enjoy himself. He and DS painted a really cool t-shirt in the craft area.

    After that we went to a nearby beach and walked out onto the pier and watched some waves and the kids petted a crab. The spray was catching the sun and every time a wave broke, it was making a rainbow, and the children were screaming in delight every single time. "Rainbow! Rainbow! Rainbow!"



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    That sounds like so much fun! I'm envious that y'all live so close that it's even possible to share birthday parties. It sounds like Myles threw a great one

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


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