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Thread: Secular Confessions

  1. #37801

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    DH still uses a bottle to get ash to sleep for naps (he's 19 months) and he still nurses to sleep for bed and lately, all.night.long. I'm exhausted too. If I try to slowly pull it out of his mouth, he grabs chunks of my boobs with both hands and follows it, not letting go. Last night I spent significant chunks of the night in 3 different beds. And I'm on week 3 of this **** flu.
    AKA Lisa724

  2. #37802
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    Oh no!

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  3. #37803

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    I'm scared of the flu. But we didn't get the shot. I have mixed feelings about it and I really feel at this point if we didn't get the shot yet and it takes a couple of weeks to be effective, I'm just going to do what we've done every year and be really diligent about hand washing and we take extra immunity stuff during these months anyway. I won't even take Sawyer to his well child visit until after winter because I can't see going to the clinic and risking exposure.

    I have nothing against bottles at all. I never pushed Kai to be done with his night bottle and he did water in a bottle for a long time until he was ready to just bring a cup of water to his bedside table. But I don't think I'd like to start one at 2 years old, you know? Then I'd have to pump and put bm in anyway since Sawyer doesn't drink anything else. Well, water but he drinks from a regular cup so a bottle would just feel like regression at this point. I dunno. He's extra fussy in general too so something must be up. We just had to pack up and leave the library after only about 15 minutes because he wouldn't stop screaming and crying and I couldn't do anything to comfort him but nurse him and even though I will nurse him in public if I need to, I don't love it as he's so wriggly and gets mad if I try to cover him at all.
    Just the other night I was nursing him in the living room and dbf came out and said how he seems to be fussy lately and I said, "Yeah, all he wants to do is nurse and it's seriously draining."
    He popped off and said, "Mommy. Top! (stop)" Lol! He was like, "don't you be talking about me like that." Dbf and I both got a good laugh at that.
    I made the call to early intervention for his speech as well. It just keeps nagging at me. The woman I spoke to was great and I explained to her how I was really on the fence and that I hesitated to make the call and she was telling me how it's nothing lost to just have him evaluated and even if he doesn't qualify they can give me some ideas on how to help him. I feel like I should know all of this already working with kids for so long but it can't hurt.

  4. #37804
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    B, I think in your shoes, I would hold off on the well visit for him too! I would think it should start peaking here hopefully soon. I know it has gotten pretty bad in Milwaukee and it seems like it travels east to west.
    I am really wishing that I would have pushed my DH to get the shot. He gets sick and is out a week or two and we have no vacation this year. So we have been avoiding being in public as much as possible.
    Last edited by Cosmosmom; 01-11-2013 at 01:33 PM.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  5. #37805
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    We were just talking about that at work Bridget. I'm in the same boat as you are. I'm so on the fence about the shot and every year I have a lot of inner turmoil about whether or not to do it...and every year it seems they're saying it's worse than the year before and they talk about all the deaths. It's frightening. But, like you, I've decided it's probably too late now anyway so we're just gonna hope for the best. I really hate this.

    Yeah, 2 is definitely a bit old for starting a bottle. What about trying to just unlatch him but keeping him close to you? You could slowly inch away a little bit at a time...?

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  6. #37806

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    Lol, Chrissy are you peeking in my bedroom window right now? What you described is what I have been doing for 15 minutes now trying to get this kid to take his nap!!! ARGHHHH!

  7. #37807

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    Lisa sorry about the flu, that really sucks. I hope you guys are on the mend.

    Bridget, I so feel for ya. BTDT with Gilly at that age, I swear there were times he nursed at that age more than when he was a newborn. Does he have his 2 year molars? I remember G being so needy and grumpy and wanting to nurse so much at that time. It seemed like it took forever for those molars to come through.

    sigh. I just talked to my dad and he wants to take step-mother to Hawaii. That is where we all went together as a family. My mother LOVED Hawaii so much. Now he's talking about taking "J" to all the places we used to go, all the places my mom loved. It makes me melancholy and miss my mom so much. I suggested he come here to Florida instead. We have nice weather this time of year and all us kids are here. sigh.
    Shelley-mom to DS, 6

  8. #37808
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bridget View Post
    Lol, Chrissy are you peeking in my bedroom window right now? What you described is what I have been doing for 15 minutes now trying to get this kid to take his nap!!! ARGHHHH!
    No comment.


    Seriously, I feel for you. I don't know how you do it. Dbf should really step it up around the house.

    Quote Originally Posted by raspberry View Post
    sigh. I just talked to my dad and he wants to take step-mother to Hawaii. That is where we all went together as a family. My mother LOVED Hawaii so much. Now he's talking about taking "J" to all the places we used to go, all the places my mom loved. It makes me melancholy and miss my mom so much. I suggested he come here to Florida instead. We have nice weather this time of year and all us kids are here. sigh.
    That would be so incredibly hard.

    Slight update on my interview from yesterday....2 of my 3 references aren't in the office today and the guy that would be my manager indicated they were hoping to call references and make a decision today. My current manager, Faye, called in to her office phone to check and she didn't have a voice mail. So it's looking like I'm not a contender after all. I'm not upset about it because I honestly didn't want to work there, but was kinda hoping to get an offer just to see if I could leverage more $ from my current position. That would have been a dangerous game to play though because if they said, "Nope, sorry" I would have had to take the other job that I really don't want. So it's probably for the best they're not calling my references.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  9. #37809
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    I went and took the flu shot on Monday, because I couldn't imagine caring for everyone in my charge if I were to get as sick as the flu is making everyone. And I'm glad, because now Khan is even more sick, and there is just no earthly way I'd be coherent enough to get him up, feed him, turn him, change his diaper, clean up, etc. and take care of Mira, Pan, Finn, and DH too, if I were to get sick at all. As it is, I'm exhausted, and barely hanging on.

    Shelley, I'm so sorry. Maybe you need to talk to your dad about how you feel, and how it might be best if he kept that sort of information to himself, because of how hurtful it can be.

  10. #37810

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    I never get flu shots and never worry about getting the flu anymore. I used to because I remember getting it when I was 13, I had it and strep at the same time and it was horrible. But they have a lot of medications now that one can take that will lessen the flu's effects and I would rather take those than the shot. I hate shots. If I get any sort of flu symptom I will just go and ask for tamiflu or something. I have asthma and am considered "high risk" but always risk myself with the flu. Elle got swine flu in 2009 when it first popped up again and she was so miserable I wished I would have gotten her the flu shot but really I wouldn't even have thought about giving her the shot at that particular time. It was early September so way too early for flu IMO. Ky never gets sick but if shows some symptoms I'd get him tamiflu as well. DH was sick recently but didn't have a fever so I didn't think it was the flu, just a cold and he is better now. I am hoping the kids don't bring home anything from school but I will stay chicken when it comes to shots and such.

    I got done with the majority of my cleaning today. I did the living room, front bathroom, kitchen, and my storage closet, which was jammed full of junk that I threw out that I know DH will be mad about. I feel kind of bad since I dumped some stuff in our garbage that I know if he saw, he would want. They are tiles, like for walls, that he found on the street 5 years ago saying he would "make a table" with them. He never did and they were taking up space so I trashed them. My storage closet has a door in it that leads to the downstairs furnace and there was so much junk in there, you couldn't see the door. We need to change our furnace filter as we haven't in over a year, we are so bad. I have been thinking about how bad we have been and how I've been having some allergy issues and I know it is probably related to the filter. You are suppose to change them monthly. I know it will be disgusting when DH pulls it out.

    Hugs to you Shelley. I would also speak to your dad about how you feel. But that is tricky since his own feelings may be hurt as well. He may also have good memories of those places that he wants to share with your step mom.

    Chrissy, maybe they are just late in calling references. However it goes, I hope it works out for the best for you.

    Erin

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    Wow Erin, I'm exhausted just reading that! I wouldn't say anything about the tiles or other stuff...maybe he won't notice or remember on his own.

    I swear, every single year 'they' say the flu is the worst ever. I'm really trying hard to tune it out. I feel like it's one of those '****ed if you do, ****ed if you don't' scenarios.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  12. #37812
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    The kid had two of her favorite classes cancelled today, PE and music, because so many of the teachers are out sick, the sub pool is exhausted, and the teachers had to go fill in the missing spots. The assistant in her class just came back from a bout herself, and missing work for a week. All that had something to do with my decision to get the shot. I'm so stressed and sleep deprived, I'm sure my immune system is all shot to hell.
    Last edited by Suja; 01-11-2013 at 06:23 PM.

  13. #37813

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    Chrissy, just for the sake of argument, maybe they aren't calling your references but they are still interested anyway? I think some places don't actually call your references. They just want to see if there are 3 or 4 people outside of your family who can say good things about you. LOL

  14. #37814

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    I was thinking that too. I don't think references always even get called.
    Suja, I can see why you got the shot. If my kids were in daycare or even school I may have considered it earlier. And now I feel like it's too late anyway.

    It was eerily warm here today and everything was melting. Savana looked out the window and said, "The Earth is doing some weird stuff today." lol. She cracks me up. Also, she never lets me brush her hair. I should make her, I know, but certain battles I won't fight and to be honest, it's her body and her hair. I tell her it does not look nice and she hates it when people say anything to her about it and I just remind her it was her choice not to brush it. She came in my room and woke me up this morning so early and said, "I'm sorry I never let you brush my hair." And then she climbed in next to me and fell right to sleep. I sometimes wish I could just get up inside her head and see what the heck is going on in that mind of hers.

  15. #37815
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    Bridget, I started to say this in another thread but feel more comfortable offering in here. I spent some time at work today making a "hand washing" visual schedule. I can share if you like, although it's just the pictures. I printed them out, backed them with construction paper, laminated, and taped them to the wall in left to right sequence just over the sink.
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  16. #37816
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    Mandy, you're so sweet and I don't know why but that just sounds adorable to me.

    I'm sure the Johnson School would call for references. Maybe something did happen where they didn't get an opportunity to check references, but I'm really totally fine with them not giving me an offer. Really, I don't want that anxiety right now.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  17. #37817

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    That's good, Chrissy. I am glad you are at peace with it. That is all that really matters.

    Mandy, thank you so much. You will never believe that I just found a handwashing routine at visualaidsforlearning.com and printed it out. Like, just now. And a brushing teeth one. What I need is one that has: socks, shoes/boots, snowpants, hat, mittens, scarf, go potty. I'm thinking of just drawing them myself. I'd take photos put my camera is broken. It's that getting ready to go out that kills us. My patience runs thin when Savana is already in the car waiting for us and Kai is laying on the floor with one boot on telling me how dino bones turn into fossils. (This exact scenario happened today.) I have to get Sawyer ready so Kai NEEDS to help himself.
    Thanks for being so helpful!

  18. #37818

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    Hi guys. I've been lurking. Sometimes the thread gets ahead of me and I don't want to respond to only one person's issues and ignore the rest so i just lurk. I have not been able to get those Newtown babies out of my head and I think that is contributing to my slight malaise. I called my Congressmen this week, not one of whom would support any form of gun control. So that's kind of useless but important to do nonetheless. But it doesn't help me from feeling sad sad sad about those little children and their families.

    We just got home from seeing "The Hobbit" and it had to be one of the worst movies I have seen since I made the mistake of going to see "The Oogieloves" last" year. I am annoyed because it isn't cheap to go see movies and this was just awful. I think 3D is ruining movies - all these long, soaring establishing shots that are supposed to dazzle but just make me sick. I had to leave halfway through "Avatar" because I thought I was going to throw up. Now they are filming all these movies with 3D in mind so even though it isn't 3D all the shots make me feel queasy.

    As I said in the other thread, I had a good friend (healthy 40 year old) die from the flu so I always get the flu shot for myself and JoJo and DH. It hasn't ever made me sick and knock wood I haven't ever gotten the flu when i have had the shot. I would rather prevent than try to cure.

    Shelley, I'm sorry your Dad is taking his new girlfriend to the spots your Mom loved. That's painful. After my dad died, my stepmother actually married her current husband in the same place she married my dad (their house) in the same room in the exact same configuration (minus myself and my brother). Then she moved him in to the same room where my dad used to be. It's too weird - just like she replaced him. After I got over the initial shock when I found out, I was okay because I think she's crazy sociopath, so that helps me not be as hurt by it - she DID replace my dad with a new man who fit the general outline because we are all general outlines to her. If I loved her it would be harder for me to reconcile.

    I hope that Khan feels better and is not so agitated, Suja.

    Kate, I wish your procedure had been successful. I hope that it takes care of itself.

    Erin, I'm sorry about your job and I'm happy that you aren't concerned - it is so much easier for you that way. I need to learn how to not care the way you do about things that you can't change. It would be a much less stressful way to live.

    Bridget, I don't have any advice for you on nursing. It seems like a distant memory though it was only three years ago.

    I know I'm missing people and I'm sorry.

    "Any idiot can face a crisis; it is this day-to-day living that wears you out." -Anton Chekhov


  19. #37819
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    I've been feeling the same way about this thread lately, and have been having a hard time posting because I didn't want to miss anyone, but I have been reading and thinking about you all. And now K. did such a wonderful job of going through it all.

    I actually saw The Hobbit in the theater, first movie in years as part of my quest to do more stuff with DH, and enjoyed it. It think Avatar may have been our last movie together, actually. I get a little queasy from swoopy IMAX films, but I was more concerned about getting a headache from the glasses and the effect. My main complaint was the amount of violence and just picking themselves up and brushing themselves off without a scratch that they did. It was video-game like in that sense. But I thought it was beautiful.

    My DS asked me yesterday if I could paint a shark. Deliberately misunderstanding, I said it would be difficult, with the wet paint and being underwater, and the shark probably wouldn't hold still for it. Apparently I wasn't misunderstanding, though. He said we could catch the shark and put him up on land for long enough for me to paint him "to look like a race car" and then lower him back under water so he would be the coolest shark in the ocean.

    Bridget, I went straight to sippy cups of cow's milk in the night when I decided to night-wean.


  20. #37820

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    Lol on the racecar shark!

    I think I speak for us all when I say beg of you ladies not to hesitate to just pop in. There is no need to feel like you need to address what everyone said. I like to think of this as a big room where we all sit around and chat. If you left the room for a long stretch of time to go to work or tend to your family which I GUESS is a valid enough reason to leave the room...you would never come back in and comment on everything that was said while you were gone. You'd just join in at that moment. Isn't that what SCUBJIA is for? I for one never think of just jumping in and sharing as being self absorbed. I think that we all just need to share here so do it in the most convenient way possible, imo.

    Lydia, the times I've tried given Sawyer milk in a sippy he took one drink and threw it. I will have to try water although at this point he is too cool for a sippy and wants a glass like his bro and sis.

    I do not recall the last grown up movie I have seen in a theater.

  21. #37821
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    Quote Originally Posted by 3andMe View Post
    My DS asked me yesterday if I could paint a shark. Deliberately misunderstanding, I said it would be difficult, with the wet paint and being underwater, and the shark probably wouldn't hold still for it. Apparently I wasn't misunderstanding, though. He said we could catch the shark and put him up on land for long enough for me to paint him "to look like a race car" and then lower him back under water so he would be the coolest shark in the ocean.
    That is hilarious! And I love these little stories. They always give me a chuckle and warm my heart. I love 'our' kids.

    Quote Originally Posted by Bridget View Post
    Lol on the racecar shark!

    I think I speak for us all when I say beg of you ladies not to hesitate to just pop in. There is no need to feel like you need to address what everyone said. I like to think of this as a big room where we all sit around and chat. If you left the room for a long stretch of time to go to work or tend to your family which I GUESS is a valid enough reason to leave the room...you would never come back in and comment on everything that was said while you were gone. You'd just join in at that moment. Isn't that what SCUBJIA is for? I for one never think of just jumping in and sharing as being self absorbed. I think that we all just need to share here so do it in the most convenient way possible, imo.
    Bridget positively nailed it! That's exactly how I feel as well. I'm sorry if I'm posting so much so fast that it's making anyone feel overwhelmed with the idea of keeping up

    Katy, I'm really sorry you're having a hard time. I've had to mentally shut out the Sandyhook shootings because it was becoming too much for me as well. I feel kind of cold doing that, but I cannot spend every day curled up on my couch crying about it. It won't undo what happened. Good for you for being so proactive and at least trying to make calls. It must be incredibly hard to live in Texas with their pro-gun attitude (among other attitudes). Just remember you're not alone in believing how you believe, even if it must feel like it at times.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  22. #37822
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    Maybe it's a boy thing....the getting ready like that? My MIL tells me that she used to have the hardest time with my DH at that age. He used to tell her, mamma, I don't move that fast, I move at T(well his name) time. LOL Even now I have found that he gets annoyed with me if I try to rush him out the door when I want to go out and do something. Though if we have a time we have to be somewhere, I am the one usually holding that up and he's better at being on time for that.

    We tried to go see hobbit and it was so packed in the parking lot we couldn't find a spot and came home. Fine by me because I didn't really want to go. But we would have gone to the normal version. The 3D movies make him feel sick. I actually really don't like going to the movies. I like going to live things like a musical but not a movie in the theater. I prefer to watch those at home. That is one thing that will be nice when his mom is able to move up here.....she can go to the movies with him.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  23. #37823

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    Katy, I have been overcome with anxiety about these things as well. Like, not to the point that I let it affect our lives but to the point that I would have to have a mental discussion with myself before leaving the house with the kids because I was afraid. And with dbf traveling a lot, at night I sometimes feel terrified. I keep promoting this book but Protecting The Gift has helped me rationalize my worries and take action to talk to my kids about things that will help them stay safe.

  24. #37824

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    Dbf gets ready super fast and then goes outside to the car and gets annoyed *I* take so long. Nevermind I'm getting 2 other people ready besides myself. (Savana takes care of herself for the most part as long as she can find the right socks with NO seams!) And god forbid if I want to comb my hair.

    I will come out carrying Sawyer and 2 bags and he'll be like, "Oh, did you need some help?"

  25. #37825
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    I went to see Ted, and the movie before that was Titanic 3D. That gave poor Jesi a migraine I wish they didn't make so many 3D movies. I know a LOT of people that can't watch them. And they say that going to the movies is on the decline...well, make ones that people can watch without getting sick or a migraine! And, make them interesting.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  26. #37826
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bridget View Post
    Dbf gets ready super fast and then goes outside to the car and gets annoyed *I* take so long. Nevermind I'm getting 2 other people ready besides myself. (Savana takes care of herself for the most part as long as she can find the right socks with NO seams!) And god forbid if I want to comb my hair.

    I will come out carrying Sawyer and 2 bags and he'll be like, "Oh, did you need some help?"
    It's not like you sprung the kids on him by surprise...he should know the routine by now!

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  27. #37827
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cosmosmom View Post
    Maybe it's a boy thing....the getting ready like that? My MIL tells me that she used to have the hardest time with my DH at that age. He used to tell her, mamma, I don't move that fast, I move at T(well his name) time. LOL Even now I have found that he gets annoyed with me if I try to rush him out the door when I want to go out and do something. Though if we have a time we have to be somewhere, I am the one usually holding that up and he's better at being on time for that.

    We tried to go see hobbit and it was so packed in the parking lot we couldn't find a spot and came home. Fine by me because I didn't really want to go. But we would have gone to the normal version. The 3D movies make him feel sick. I actually really don't like going to the movies. I like going to live things like a musical but not a movie in the theater. I prefer to watch those at home. That is one thing that will be nice when his mom is able to move up here.....she can go to the movies with him.
    Nope, not a boy thing. Plenty of boys who aren't that way. And girls who are.
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  28. #37828
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    Mine is really great and responsible at some things....like paying the bills on time. I never think about the bills or what is due when. But not something like looking down and seeing if the dogs have fresh water and food. Cosmo especially likes REALLY fresh water....she is just a more prissy dog. Molly will eat or drink just about anything. I have just learned do to that before I leave in the morning or he forgets.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  29. #37829

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    Last movie I saw was Django on Christmas. It was between that, Les Mis, and The Hobbit. I heard the Hobbit was really long and was kind of upset that they made it a 3 part movie since the book is so short. I can understand the Lord of the Rings being 3 movies since it was 3 books, but the Hobbit was only one book and I think they are just trying to take advantage of the viewing public making it 3 movies so I am boycotting it lol. I also heard it was horrible so am glad I have stayed away from it.

    We still may go see Les Mis. DH used to be an usher and saw it on stage many times. He knows the whole musical and it is funny because he is what I call a stereotypical "angry black man" (he can look mean over things he is passionate about so I joke with him that he is an angry black man) and I think it is cute that he knows every freaking line of Les Mis. He freaking loves that musical too. He is a horrible singer unfortunately so I have had to endure many horrendous renditions of every song. I told him we could only go if he promised not to sing. At first he did, but now he isn't so sure. I am thinking we may still go and just sit is seats away from each other lol.

    I LOVED Django. It was a really funny movie and I don't get all the controversy surrounding it either. But I am a fan of Tarantino, and so I knew what to expect when it came to comic style movies and bloody gore. It was very entertaining but I felt it could have been shorter. My butt started to hurt in the last 45 minutes. Sam Jackson was freaking hilarious in the movie IMO. He did a great "Uncle Ruckus" sort of character, the guy from The Boondocks cartoon. Don't know if you ladies watched that but it was also freaking hilarious to me and is one of my most frequently watched Netflix shows because I laugh all the time at them. Especially at the lawyer on Boondocks and his fear of going to prison as he has an extreme phobia of being "anally raped" lol. You have to watch it to appreciate it.


    Erin

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    I love the shark story. That would be so cool to do, but you'd probably get PETA after you if you did that.....

    I loved the Hobbit as a book, but I keep hearing how people hated it at the cinema, so I think I'll probably not waste my money on it. We watched the last of the Lord of the Rings trilogy at Christmas, and I was telling DH about how sad the ending is as I don't want to say goodbye to Frodo and Bilbo since they seem like my friends. He gave me one of those looks that looks like he's thinking, "I don't really understand you." I also hate 3D movies. DH thinks they are the bee's knees and he's all about HDTV, but I must have bad eyes because I don't see any difference in HDTV....and 3D movies do not look 3D to me!

    Argh, you guys, I think my car is dying or something. I dropped DH off in town to go out with his band mates for a night out pub hopping, and when I was driving back home, I noticed that the car started vibrating all funny. When I shifted gears, it would sputter. Then, when I got home, I got out of the car and it smelled like the car was on fire. I popped the hood thinking that I'd see flames or smoke, but there was nothing. The back tires smelled funny, so it seemed like it must be the breaks, but that wouldn't affect the gear box, would it? I'll have to take it in to get looked at, which is a pain since we don't really have much spare money lying around for car repairs. Daggum cars.

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