Secular Confessions

[Ky'sMom]

I only had to wait 2 hours last night, which was good. Luckily my aunt was taken to the "good" jail. At the county facility they won't let people out as quickly.

And I took the job thing well because I was sick of them anyway. DH has even told me to quit because they were getting on my nerves so much. I still haven't received my separation letter. I asked for a severence package so I am sure that is the reason for the hold up. I didn't ask for much though, only 3 months pay. Last time they fired a bunch of people they gave those employees 6-12 months. My former boss got 2 years pay and 6 months full benefits package, so I feel I was generous. I rarely get upsets over jobs though. I have worked from home doing things often and I can just do that if I want to and I know a lot of people who have asked me to come work for them. So losing jobs really isn't a huge deal. Luckily, DH also makes enough money to float us along as we have less expenses now than we did when I was a SAHM since we got our assessed value on the house lowered. Our mortgage is really low and we only have electric and water bills so I don't really worry about money since we live really cheaply anyway. I try to have us live off of only $30K per year and it is doable because of our low housing expenses.

Chrissy, good luck on the job interview!!! keeping my fingers crossed for you.

Suja, I hope Khan is on the mend and am happy he is getting good care.

That reminds me as well that our dog was cleared from heartworms. So his treatment was successful. The vet talked DH into giving him Heartguard Plus, which I am wary of since he was on the regular Heartguard before. I may switch it sooner then the 6 month period is up. They did reimburse us for the treatment though and lucky for them, our vet is pretty cheap so it was only about $900. I have heard that it can cost up to $2K for heartworm treatment.

Erin

[Bridget]

What did you decide about your aunt? Are you going to encourage her to find somewhere else to live? I have to say, you are a really good friend/family member. Seems like you have enought to deal with on your own without the added stress.

[missychrissy]

glad your doggie is better Erin.

I'm on break during my interview day. the last woman flat out asked me if I had family. when I smiled and nodded, she said, "kids?" I was shocked and didn't think fast enough. I could have laughed it off and said I thought that was one of the taboo topics, but instead I told her, "you can't ask me that."

me and my direct mouth. :p

[dana_renay]

Chrissy - When is the wedding? If you come to St. Louis, we should meet up. Let me know if you're interested.

Erin - I can't believe your job just up and fired you, although it sounds like you are fine with it. You should definitely press them for severance...is there a corporate severance policy? I'm guessing no, since they sound so disorganized and messed up. I hope you are able to work things out with your aunt. It was nice of you to pay the fine to get her out.

Suja - I hope Khan rallies again. I'm sorry you're in the position of having to make that hard decision.

I have been really feeling blue the last few weeks. Lots of stories I wish I hadn't heard or looked at about little kids being killed in one way or another. Shot, drowned, hit by a car, left in a car, crushed by their furniture...I think about my beautiful DD and how she is my whole world and I would die if anything ever happened to her. I can't seem to shake the sadness. I hope it is just a little seasonal blues, like Chrissy said, and not the beginning of another depressive episode. I haven't had one in a long time, and I've been off all my meds for over a year. I live in fear of the downward spiral.

[Cosmosmom]

Good luck Chrissy and Kate! Chrissy did she seriously ask that as an interview question? Or was it just a more casual curious thing making conversation?

Suja, I'm hoping that Khan feels better quickly and is ok.

Erin that is crazy....but your calm attitude is even more crazy! You are so lucky to have that. We would be freaking out about something like that. You had been talking about them lately and how much they were annoying you so it sounds like good thing.

[Suja]

I can't believe she asked you that, Chrissy! I hope your interview goes really well otherwise.

Erin, I like how unstressed you are about the job thing. Those idiots don't deserve you anyway.

Khan is no better this morning. Last time, he bounced back very quickly, so I'm really worried that he won't pull through. You see, he had a small episode yesterday the morning that he recovered from really quickly, then again this one, which got better by the time we got to the vet, but by the time we came home, it's as bad as it has ever been, and I think it has stayed that way. I'm worried that he's having a series of mini strokes. He is eating and drinking. For now, that'll have to do, but I have a bad feeling about this thing.

[Cosmosmom]

Oh Suja I'm sorry. I'm still going to hope that he gets better soon. Maybe the UTI is making it so much worse? That once that antibiotics kick in on that, he will bounce back more?

[Suja]

Oh Suja I'm sorry. I'm still going to hope that he gets better soon. Maybe the UTI is making it so much worse? That once that antibiotics kick in on that, he will bounce back more?

That's the hope, but the two things are unrelated. At least with the UTI under control, he won't be in any pain or discomfort.

[Cosmosmom]

Suja that is true (I had to look it up as I hadn't heard of that in dogs before). But I still think that when your body is fighting an infection and is stressed, it makes you more prone to other issues and harder to bounce back.

[missychrissy]

Suja.

Yes, Jennifer. It was an interview question. I mean, she was only trying to be friendly, but it was in the midst of the technical questions others were asking me. Another man, Ron, spoke right up behind me and let her know she couldn't ask that and said, "Let the jury strike that from the record" or something like that, and we all laughed. There was one other hiccup. I didn't understand where one guy was coming from, or what he was really asking me. The way he phrased the question made me think he was asking about programming (it was regarding proprietary software some professors designed years and years ago and is still utilizing Windows 2000 servers). He kept asking me what I'd say to the professors to make them understand how it would work on a modern desktop....? I'm help desk. I don't do programming. I tried to clarify, thinking maybe there would be security issues and asked if the same computers would need access to the internet, specific ports open? But I just wasn't 'getting' it because he wouldn't clarify-just repeat the same question. So I finally said that it sounded like a programming thing to me and I'd likely be the last person the professor would be chatting with about that. :shrug:

Otherwise, I think I did very well and he was just one of a dozen that I spoke to. I impressed all the others so I guess I can hope that someone else called him on his poorly worded question and that won't count against me. They can't count the "do you have kids?" against me or else they'll be in HUGE trouble!

[Suja]

Did you like the people you interviewed with? Can you foresee working with them?

[Ky'sMom]

I did bring up to my aunt that she needs to consider moving back to our hometown and that her attitude and refusal to follow common laws and regulations here, even though they are minor things, are the main reasons she is having so many issues, both financially, with the law, and at jobs that she obtains. She just complains about how things are here and speaks about how unfair it is instead of taking responsibility for her actions in the situation. Like with this ticket and with her not having insurance on her car or an up to date tag. In Atlanta you will go to jail for both of those things and you will have to pay hundreds if not thousands of dollars in fines, here it is more outrageous than in Ohio for these sorts or things in comparison, also Detroit is not as harsh on traffic things either and she lived in Detroit for a couple years before moving down here. But IMO you have to adjust. She knows that things here are more stringent for traffic issues. She needs to accept that and take responsibility for her actions. We have a subway system. If you cannot afford to pay your insurance/tag fee, take the freaking train. I did it for years when I couldn't afford a car/fees associated with car ownership. I have told her that she can use my vehicle. Since I only lived about a mile from my job, she could have taken a bus directly downtown and gotten my vehicle and driven it around to interviews and such. I have insurance that will cover her so it is no big deal and I have said that to her. But she doesn't want to use my vehicle because she "doesn't feel comfortable driving other people's cars." I'm like, whatever. I would drive someone's vehicle who offered it to me if I had no tag or insurance because I don't want to go to jail. So she has options and just didn't take them. Even with this fine she had to pay. It was originally only $150. She should have made her son pay it and even if she didn't have him pay it, she could have asked me to put $25 to $50 on the fee and I would have and wouldn't even have asked for the money back. She just ranted on and on about how unfair and stupid the traffic probation thing is here. I agree it is stupid - they put people on probation who cannot pay the full amount of a ticket as if not having money is a crime worthy of probation, this is something that does not happen where we are from - the court will usually just give you the option of paying it by a certain date, usually about 3-6 months and you bring it down when you have the money and all is well unless you go over 6 months, then they will put out a warrant for you. So she kept talking about that versus the stupid probation system here and speaking of how they criminalize poor people and put fees on you since those on probation have to pay more than the actual fine, something that also doesn't happen in our hometown.

There are other things she has done where she just complains and complains and compares and feels sorry for herself and says she is "unlucky." After our conversation she did say she would consider moving back to Ohio if she didn't get a job within the next few weeks. Luckily, she got a job offer today. She is an RN so jobs for her are not hard to find. But she is picky and won't take anything less than $30 an hour usually. I told her she better take a job and get some money and she did so I am glad.

Erin

[daylilies]

Hi guys, I am back and feeling pretty good. They couldn't do anything, though. They weren't able to do it because my bladder is not normal since I have had various surgeries on it to augment it and to tighten the urethra (I used to have a big problem with wetting myself when I was a kid and they had to do a number of surgeries to finally make it so I wouldn't leak). They just couldn't do it with the standard equipment so they put me under for nothing, which actually went smoother than I expected. The nurse got the IV in on the first try which is very unusual for me. I asked her if I could take her with me next time I need another one. I remember being wheeled into the room but I don't remember falling asleep. I've always been a little freaked out about how that works. I'd rather remember than feel like that chunk of time is just missing from my memory!

But anyway, I have a rx for pills I'm supposed to take for 3 months to see if they will dissolve the stones, and if they don't, I'll probably have to have surgery to remove them.

So, I woke up crying as I usually do when I've been under anesthesia. DH came in a few minutes later and I got cleared to go with my rx and we got something to eat and came home. I feel a bit tired which could also just be because I have my period.

Oh, and DH redeemed himself for whatever wrongs he's done lately by walking to Target to get pads for me because one of our cars got a flat on the way home from the doctor and the other one wouldn't start. Oy.

The anesthesiologist asked me something funny. When I told him I have spina bifida, he said, I've always been curious, does everything in girl-town work properly? It was just so funny how he asked.

[missychrissy]

Kate, that's funny! I'm sorry you went through all that and they couldn't do anything though What a bummer.

Erin, I'm with you about people needing to take responsibility for themselves, and whether they agree or not, it's best to just conform to the norms society dictates. Or, relocate.

[Cosmosmom]

Kate I'm glad it went well but not that they couldn't do much about it. Ummm....obviously some things must work pretty well since you have Josh! LOL

[daylilies]

Well I did have to have a c-section since I don't really have the ability to use those muscles. And missing out on the whole enjoyment aspect is a bummer. But everyone expected me to be on bedrest for months and I made it to 37 weeks with no problems, so I was pretty happy with that!

[Ky'sMom]

Kate that is pretty funny the anesthesiologist asked that lol. Girl town...too funny.

Today I am going to do a deep clean of my house. It will probably take all day, so I am sure to be tired this weekend. I am looking forward to it, but also not looking forward to it so sigh for me. I hate cleaning but am good at it, the conundrums of live I tell you.

Erin

[missychrissy]

Can you all do me a favor? If you ever need help with your IT dept, resist the urge to go running to them and poking your head in their cube or office and blurting out your issue. Unless, of course it's on fire but even then you really should't be going to IT. Just unplug it and get a fire extinguisher yourself.

I spent 6-8 hours troubleshooting something that has all of us stymied. I was researching, clicking things, making changes...completely hosed my own Internet Explorer for a solid hour. I finally got mine to work in this certain way that has everyone stumped, and someone poked her head in and said all hyper-like, "My Outlook is funny colors!" I know I smiled, because I'm professional, but it was totally a frozen, "I cannot believe you think this is a f'n emergency!" smile. My colleague swept her off to go have a look (bless his heart) but when I went back to test my browser/download and it worked, I couldn't remember what changes I'd just made to make it work.

It's been 2 days. I cannot get any others to work but even after doing group policy updates and restarting my machine a bunch of times, it's working as it should. No one else's is and I need to figure out what I did to fix it. Now, I'm resorting to imaging a brand new desktop just so I can remote into it and look at each and every Windows Security setting as well as IE setting side by side and see what's different. If I'm lucky, I'll find it by the end of today.

I'm so flipping mad at this one woman (whom I usually love) because her little 'emergency' lost me hours (if not days) worth of work.

[Cosmosmom]

Yikes Chrissy that is frustrating!

I don't have the option to go to IT in person. We HAVE to call on the phone and only sometimes do I get someone local....most of the time I get someone in another state since they converged our various location IT people.

[Bridget]

ARgh! I had a response all typed out and my computer shut down without warning me first!

Chrissy, that sounds so frustrating and I know just the type of smile your are talking about that you gave her.

Erin, I am a little jealous of your deep cleaning opportunity. I hate cleaning too but when I know my house needs cleaning it makes me irratable. I'd love the chance to do it all in one sweep instead of a little bit at a time so that when I get back where I started, it's ready for cleaning again. I recently emptied out my hall closet that was the bane of dbf's existence because I was always throwing stuff in there when I didn't have any other place for it. It's right next to my kitchen so I turned it into my pantry. My kitchen storage is very limited which meant I always had stuff on the counters and so even when I cleaned, it still didn't look very clean. I mean, I didn't even have roomn to put all my groceries away! So I gutted the closet and then loaded it up again and now I my kitchen is almost spacious. I don't know why I didn't think of this a long time ago.

Sawyer is wearing me out, nursing half the night. Literally. He wakes around 2 am and I can't get him off me until morning. I'm torn between trying to do some gentle night weaning and then wondering if maybe he's going through something or coming down with something so needs to nurse to get through it. Either way, I'd LOVE some sleep.

[missychrissy]

Woo hoo on a clean, spacious kitchen!

Awww, hopefully this is a short lived phase Bridget. Did you do any weaning with the others?

[Bridget]

I pumped with them and gave them bottles. Neither of them were able to latch when they were born because I have inverted nipples and I had no one to help me figure it out so I just started pumping and once they got used to the bottle they wouldn't even try to nurse. Savana started sleeping through the night almost right away and gave up the bottle no problem around a year. Kai took years to sleep through the night.

[missychrissy]

Hmmm....that's a tough one. Poor little guy. Is he sleeping while nursing?

[Suja]

That sucks, Chrissy. I hope you get to the bottom of it soon. We are our own IT department, so we just interrupt ourselves.

We are doing a pilot for a big client, and ran into a problem with OS/compiler compatability. DH didn't get home until midnight, and then stayed up all night building a machine, downloading and installing the OS, configuring it, and then couldn't find a C Compiler. This would've broken the deal entirely, so in the 15 minutes I had this morning, did some search for him. 3 searches, 3 hits (the existing compiler needed updating, then the security key had to be re-installed, then something else that I can't remember), he was able to compile, no problems. My GoogleFu is AWESOME! I told him that he can pay me in diamonds.

My head is spinning from the lack of sleep. It probably doesn't help that because I spent my 'shower time' aGoogling, I'm a stinky mess (no one would know it, though).

[Bridget]

He is. Wakes up the second I try to ease away. He's always woken in the night to nurse but usually was easy to unlatch and get him back over in his crib (sidecarred).

[Suja]

He is. Wakes up the second I try to ease away. He's always woken in the night to nurse but usually was easy to unlatch and get him back over in his crib (sidecarred).

Will he take a bottle?

[missychrissy]

It's probably become a habit for him and is for comfort. That's gonna be rough.

Suja, we interrupt ourselves all the time too...even then, I had 4-5 other techs coming over with different ideas and going back to their spaces to try different things. But we can generally tell when someone is buried and leave them be. I think it's beyond rude for the users to just march back here for any little thing and demand instant attention.

[Bridget]

He has never had a bottle.

Chrissy, that does sound terribly rude.
Suja, I am a stinky mess today too but hoping to get a shower before we venture out.

[missychrissy]

When I first weaned Jesi, I started by giving her a bottle. She went through a period where she had to sleep with a bottle of water. It was very brief and I'm sure she wasless than 1 year of age. I'm not sure how well that would work for him...or if it's something you'd consider doing (absolutely ok with me if not, because we all do what we think is best for our own kids). So initially I'd breastfeed normally, then started offering a bottle every other feeding. At some point I couldn't get her to sleep very easy and ended up trying one of her bottles with just water in it (I was afraid of tooth decay) and that worked for her. Other parents used pacifiers but I think they have to be very young for that...and none of my kids took to them.

I think with Sawyer a large piece of it is probably just being near you. Have you tried just detaching him but not moving him? Or doesn't that work?

[Suja]

I wish I had stopped the bottle with Mira when she was younger. Now, I'm just going to let her do it when she's ready. It's a comfort thing for her to "Lie down on mama's lap and drink warm milkie", and although she knows she shouldn't be doing it, she wants to anyway. She's too big to fit on mama's lap comfortably as well.