L, you have the most amazing stories. What a bathroom break!
Omg, L. I don't know what to say to your bathroom story! That's just crazy! I love C's rendition of the 12 day's of Xmas. It reminded me of how I used to sing that song "My country tis of thee." The part that says "of thee I sing" was interpreted by me as "of DIC." I always wondered what DIC stood for. I was about 16 before it just occurred to me that that's not what the lyric was!
I'll have to log on to my laptop later to type more. Typing ony phone is so tedious, but I have more to share later. Cash is at daycare today, so it's just me and Travis at home today, and we are going to have a tidying up day.
We've had a pretty good day of tidying; I got the ironing done and washed all the bedding. Travis has just been making a list of who he wants at his birthday party (it's not til May). He keeps insisting that he only wants the boys to come-no girls allowed. He also said that he doesn't want *Tommy* to be there because he's the one who is smelly. He does make me laugh some times. Last night, I had just finished shampooing both his and Cash's hair so I left the room for a minute only to hear him scream at the top of his lungs, "POO! POO! POOOOOOOOOOOO!" DH and I ran to the bathroom at the same time to see Cash sitting there surrounded by a few turds and Travis glued to the wall like Spiderman (he was standing on the edge of the tub and looked like he was stuck to the wall). I think I should be trying a little harder to potty train Cash, but we haven't put much effort in to it just yet.
Travis is wanting me to pretend to be a dog now, so I'll have to finish my post later! (Probably tonight when he is in bed!)
Happy New Year's Eve everyone!!! I have also been out of town. We got back on Saturday and I had a great time with my family, joking around and all. I think I told you all I had to have my aunt move in with me so I have also been dealing with that, which isn't too bad since I grew up in a really large family where people always stayed with us when they needed a place to crash in hard times. I have been worried about DH dealing with it, but he has been great. My dad said he had a good heart to heart with DH and dad told me that he is so happy and it almost made him tear up over how much he can see that DH loves and cares about me. I know this as well but I forget sometimes when he is being a butthead. Since our trip DH has been good and we didn't have any issues at all on the trip and I am grateful for that.
I got a "smoking" illness from my family members who smoke in the house and I am just getting over it. I get a head cold of sorts anytime I am around smokers in the house for an hour or more. Sometimes less than that. I had a good time at my mom's sister's house though where they got me sick with their smoking so I am just trying to get over the smoking illness quickly and looking on the bright side of things.
Like you Chrissy, I don't want to go back to work. My former boss has said she is pushing to get me started with her at her current place of employment but that it would probably be less money than she initially thought she would be able to get for me salary wise. That's disappointing since she worked in a suburb and I'd have an actual commute over 10 minutes with that position. I would actually just take the subway out there since it is an "inner" suburb and easily accessible via transit but that would be an extra $100 a month in transit fees. The position would only be about $6K more but honestly I am getting sick of my current job and the people there. They were actually calling me on my vacation, when I have told them that I am not the one to call on vacation as I will not respond. Everyone knows this about me, yet they call me anyway when I am out of town about payroll of all things, something I am not even involved in anymore since I trained the new girl to do it. Plus the situation was about someone not getting their full amount of money on their direct deposit and issues like that go through our corporate office. All of the managers know this, yet they still contact me. One was funny because they said "I contacted X in corporate but she is out of the office on vacation." I found that hilarious since I am also out on vacation and X is the only person who can remedy that situation so they will have to wait until she gets back. It is such a little thing but they are just really getting on my nerves so I am ready for a change even for less money and a farther commute. I am already dreading them calling me when I leave about stupid things they can't figure out for themselves.
Oh L! I don't know what I woulda done at that bathroom!
I'd love to read and catch up but of course Conner noticed I was comfy and settling in and thus needs me to help him clean bbq sauce off his new shirt. It's imperative, ya know.
Hi Erin! Was wondering how your holidays fared.
We were also out of town for the weekend, with my mom's family for their Christmas party. It was fun but apparently wore out the men in the family as today they are both moaning and groaning about headaches and scolding the kids for being too loud. I had quite enough of that bs and asked all those with headaches to leave the main living area.
We went to our neighbor's for wine and pizza and of course dbf over indulged on both counts so he went to bed and so I am watching Outfoxed with dss. Happy New year!
Erin, I'm glad your vacation went so well. I know you had some reservations about how your dh would behave since it was your family. I'm so glad he behaved and y'all had a great time. I wish you family wouldn't smoke in their house though. I smoke-but never in my house. I don't in my car when other people are with me either.
That's a bummer about the job maybe not being as much as you'd hoped...but who knows? Maybe they'll come up with something before an official offer is made. I'm kinda dreading my interview on the 7th...not because I get nervous, but because I don't want to make that decision right now. Faye just became my manager. Maybe things would be better under her? And have I mentioned I love her? I really, truly do. She's such an awesome person. The flip side is, I'm really living paycheck to paycheck and the Johnson School (I probably mentioned) pays very well across the board. If they offered a significant amount more, I'd have no choice but to take it. I'm trying to think of what that 'significant amount' should be. 10,000-definitely. But is it worth leaving an IT team that I truly love for just 5,000? I don't know. Less than that, absolutely not.
I know I've probably already said it, but good luck with your interview, Chrissy! Mine is also on the 7th. I have to write a short essay, do a 30 minute interview with 2 teaching staff and then give a 5 minute presentation on an object of my choice that would be a good teaching resource. I haven't thought too much about the interview. I think I'll do a crash revision weekend this coming weekend where I'll do all the prep for it. I always do a lot better in interviews when I think up of as many hypothetical questions in my head and write down what I think I should say. I'm never great at answering things so eloquently on the spot. I think for my object, I might take a Christmas card that my Grandma sent to me from the USA. It's a typical Americana type card with a little white house with a flag on the porch surrounded by snow with a cardinal bird sitting on a branch of a tree. I figure I can talk about how I could use this card for religious education, geography, art, and even to use it as a writing prompt for an English/literacy lesson.
DH and I have been discussing finances. We did OK this year with me going back to work in September. I think this year will be tough as well, though, if I get on to a teaching program because I'll have to get a loan to cover the cost of that and won't be working/paid at all while training. I hate how tight money is right now. When I look back to just a few years ago and we could do 3 big vacations a year and now we only just get by. I started feeling really down in the dumps about it the other day because I really miss my family. I started feeling like I was wallowing in misery. I hate that kind of feeling; the one where you know there is nothing that is going to change your circumstances. DH tried to cheer me up by saying about how we're lucky that our kids are healthy and that we have a nice house and lots of things that other people don't have, but I didn't want to hear it. I just needed to feel sorry for myself. I think as the year goes on, I'll get over it. For one thing, I'll be too busy to think about people back home too much. And then with time, things ease a little. I think what makes it hard for me is how well off most of our friends are compared to us. Mostly, my BIL and SIL. He is very high up in his company is very well paid, so she doesn't work. They're talking about going to Disneyland Paris and somewhere else this year. I'm pretty sure we won't be doing any vacations. We used to all go together as a family, but ever since I gave up my office job, we can't keep up with them any more in regards to vacations. I know that eventually I'll be on a teacher's salary and the kids' childcare costs will decrease, but in the meantime, finances at our just plain suck.
Ashley, school is such an investment in your future and in the greater scheme of things it is such a short time. I remember when I was in school and living on loans it seemed like my finances would be that way forever. Trust me, when you are done and have that paycheck rolling in you will see why it was worth it. It won't be that way forever, I promise!
That's a great idea about the Christmas card! Love it!
Ash, I can't imagine how hard it is to live so far from your family. I do know how difficult it is to live paycheck to paycheck, without even a glimmer of hope that there will be a nice vacation in the upcoming year. It really sucks, but there's nothing to do but keep on keepin on. This too shall pass & all that.
My freaking interview is literally going to be all day. Well, 5 hours. I have never had an interview like this one is going to be. I'm looking forward to the experience of it, but not if it ends up in an offer. Here's the agenda the HR rep emailed me before our break:
She later wrote and requested the 7th instead, but still the same agenda. I'm still not nervous at all. I'm not sure I could get nervous at an interview. I know what I know, and I'm confident in my abilities. Lucky for me, every place I ever worked people love me so it helps me 'sell' myself I guess. I simply do not get intimidated by people.Good afternoon, Christina –
I am pleased to tell you that you have been selected as one of the final candidates for the Technology & Computer Lab Specialist position at Johnson. I would like to invite you to an in-person interview. This interview will consist of several separate meetings, as outlined below. Might you be available on Wednesday, January 3 from 9 am – 1:45 pm?
Search Committee (Tracy Bx, Tom Px, Dustin Rx, Kathy Dx, Mike Lx) - 45 minutes
Kerwin-Michael Sx, Sara Ax, Rob Px, Marcie Px – 45 minutes
Margaret Sx, Lakshmi Bx, Kevin Bx, Kassy Cx – 30 minutes
Todd Kx – 15 minutes
Sunny Dx – 15 minutes (if available)
Meal with Tom and Tracy – 1 hour
Wrap up with Mike – 15 minutes
I look forward to hearing from you,
Last edited by missychrissy; 01-01-2013 at 04:06 PM.
I wonder if they go to that much trouble to hire the university president! That's one hell of an interview schedule.
No kidding. They obviously take themselves very seriously, which already leads me to believe it probably won't be a good fit for me. I work hard, but I also like to be silly and playful. I laugh at myself a lot. And I'm used to a very relaxed atmosphere (remember, my IT colleague was sitting on my lap while I scratched his back ) I know that kind of shenanigans won't be able to happen anywhere else, but I would like to be able to have some fun. I'm not sure I'm 'business school' material. Not by a long shot!
There are a couple women in my building that are actually part of the Johnson School. They told me it's between me and one other person, so I have at least a 50% shot at it. Like I said before though, the money better be good or else no deal. I'd really like to see if the atmosphere in my current position changes now that Faye is the manager. If not, I can always look elsewhere again...and perhaps get a position in a department that isn't so professional.
That's almost like a Google interview! Way to go, Chrissy! They must think they're awesome, and if they think they are, they probably think you're pretty special just to get an interview with them.
Ashley, good luck with yours, too. You sound very prepared and I like your theme. Don't doubt yourself, for what you're doing now and in your life in general. You have a good plan and a secure life; overall you're a very positive person and many studies show that wealth is not correlated with happiness. You are probably doing better than most of the people you know who are able to take fancy vacations more often but who may not be as content with their lives or their spouses. It's hard to see what happens behind closed doors.
I told my DH today that I hoped it was okay I mentioned the story about the hooker in the playground bathroom to a couple of people, because it was such an awesome story. I wasn't sure if he'd approve of me talking about it, since it compromised his dignity a bit. He said sure, and asked if I was including the part about how he was carrying a poopy diaper at the time, since he'd just changed S. (I didn't know), and how the woman, trying to pretend like she wasn't doing anything, called him "Sir" and quickly blurted out that she had forgotten her purse in the men's room and had just gone in there to retrieve it. I told DH I didn't know that either, and he said he was so distressed at the time he must have not told me any more details, but she must have thought he was a cop.
Ash, I know nothing about teaching but your proposed idea impressed me. I'd love for you to be one of my kid's teacher, and that says a lot since I generally do not like or trust teachers as a general rule. Good luck!! I agree with L, too, in that you don't know how far in debt some people may be by trying to do it all and have it all. I make a decent wage, especially for my area. I make more than the household median income all by myself, and I still don't have extra spending money or vacations. I often wonder how the heck other people do it. Of course, they also don't have 4 kids...so, there's that.
Your poor dh. It just gets better and better.
I learned, on Facebook, that my grandfather passed away. I'm at work and I guess I'm just going to stay here since there's not much I can do. I'm really worried about my mom. I just sent a text asking my cousin to have someone please call my mom and tell her before she learns about her dad on Facebook. How sad is it I have to make that request? I told her I'd call her myself, but I don't know anything other than the fact that he's dead and Mom would probably appreciate some details. Man, that side of the family is all kinds of messed up. Melly posted that 7 hours ago and no one has called my mom. That part is actually killing me more than the fact that he died.
Jeez Chrissy, that is a shame! I hope someone reaches your mom before she sees it on facebook.
A cop carrying a poopy diaper is a great undercover disguise.
So sorry about your grandfather Chrissy. I so hope someone has contacted your mom via phone or in person about it as that is so tacky to even speak about the death of a loved one on FB when the immediate family has not been notified about the death yet. So tacky and sad. I will be thinking of your mom and hope she is okay.
Good luck to you Ash on your interview! I also think that you and your family probably have it going on more than others. I know for a fact that even when only my DH was working and we made substantially less money that we were doing better financially that friends/family I have that make way more than what he made. Mostly because I am very frugal and really stick to budgets and they do not. They also have a lot of debt or are house poor. One of DHs cousins lives in a McMansion and has a $50K SUV, they go on vacations 4-5 times per year, but are always talking about how their bills aren't paid. They also complain about how they cannot get their McMansion refinanced because they owe more than it is worth now due to the poor economy. They bought it in 2006 for about $500K, which was a ridiculous amount IMO even back then considering that city that they live in, which isn't all that great. The house doesn't really have any furniture in it at all and they recently had to trade in their $50K SUV for a smaller/cheaper vehicle. The wife is always bragging about stuff and vacations, but the husband is always lamenting about money and how they don't have enough. So even when people are spending like crazy, it doesn't mean they are financially better off than someone else. It may just mean they don't know how to manage their money. I know a lot of people that are "house poor" who still like to chide me and DH about where we live because we live in a poorer neighborhood. But our mortgage is very low and our house is very nice, even though it is small. It is fully furnished, we have 3 vehicles that are paid for and we have been on about 3-4 vacations in 2012. I am not a big vacation person though so I hope to not have more than one this year. I am more of a homebody. But all that to say that when we lived on one small income, we we did okay and didn't go anywhere and now, only 2 years later, we can afford to go on 3-4 vacations per year. DH went on 2 by himself and me on 1 by myself so really we went on more than 3-4 even though they were shorter than European vacations.
Chrissy, I am so sorry to hear about your grandfather. And that the family is being irresponsible douchebags about informing your mom.
Ash, I'm sorry you're feeling blue about the finances. This is just a temporary situation, and it too, shall pass. As the others have mentioned, perhaps the ones taking multiple vacations and having fancy cars/homes are not exactly being fiscally responsible. I think that I've mentioned this before, but when I worked at the NIH, the person at the department with the fanciest car (Acura) was the lady that washed the dishes. And a financial advisor friend tells me that she runs into people ALL the time with fancy jobs, lots of income, but no savings and loads of debts because they need 4 cars for two people, and live in a 14 million dollar house when a 4 million one would do just as well, and take multiple expensive vacations a year (the worst one she mentioned was a lawyer and partner in a law firm, whose take home after taxes was about 22K a month, but was spending 24K a month, had a completely unfunded 401k, no savings, and no money set aside for his two young kids' education). You seem to have a wonderful husband, two terrific kids, and your health. If you had absolutely nothing else at all you would still be richer than that of a lot of people.
Erin, it's funny you mention McMansion and 500k. Around here, it probably buys a slightly above starter home. For real McMansions, you'd have to tack on a '0' to the end of that number. And DH is carrying on about wanting one of those (not quite that high, but still very spendy). He does have a point in that it impacts his ability to do business when he cannot host clients in a certain way, but that's going to be one hell of a giant mortgage, and I am extremely, extremely, debt averse (we currently have no mortgage on our house, cars are fully paid up, etc.).
Last edited by Suja; 01-02-2013 at 09:53 AM.
I broke one of my own rules and posted a huge rant on FB about it. They can see it and I don't care. I saved the good stuff to tell them to their faces.
Chrissy, I'm so sorry for your loss and can't believe your mom's family. Unfortunately, I have similar family members like that. What can I say about certain people. I suppose it's better left unsaid.
Thank you all for giving me the kick up the bum that I needed. I refuse to begin the new year feeling so sorry for myself! Thank you, my good friends! I'm off now to cook some dinner for the family. I'm doing that sausage recipe from the skinny web site that Suja posted awhile back.
I got lucky in that my interview for my current position was barely even an interview. But most in my field have all day long interviews that often include lunch and sometimes dinner PLUS you have to have to give a presentation.
I agree that you can't really compare to the Jones because generally you don't know the reality. Just this past week I kind of went off a bit at the MIL because she kept saying how we were so well off. My DH is one of three cousins in that family and the one was just given grandpas car. She bought it for 5K but it's worth about 10-11K. Supposedly it's always poor her, her ex ruined her credit blah blah blah (doesn't help that I do not like this cousin at all and she is a Jenny so his family calls me that and I hate it. I go by Jennifer or sometimes Jen). Which would be ok but his family is all about keeping things equal and even. and her father is sitting on a LOT of money. And her fiance inherited a half a million and they brag about how he makes six figures (which is that area is a lot). Her brother, the other cousin, people were all like well he could use the help too. But DH and I are just so well off. Um no, we are fine but not rich. I pointed out that our house is the worth the same as his cousin and his wife makes about more than I do. We are probably pretty equal financially. It just looks like we are so well off because we built our house....which only happened because it was so cheap to do it where we live now. We don't take a lot of vacations....have only done two big ones in 9 years. Don't have cell phones and data plans and go out much. And we have the adoption that we have been saving for. I mean grandpa can do what he wants with his money but grandma wanted things equal. But the one sibling who is the father of the cousins is pushy and will screw over anyone to further his agenda (I don't really like him either). My MIL isn't one to make waves and really talks about her brother like he is some bully and if you stand up to him he will hate you for life. It just bugs me that my DH feels like once again he is overlooked and getting screwed over. Plus MIL wanted this car herself as it is better than her current one. Oh and Jenny was bragging on FB about what a great deal she got from her grandpa which was irritating MIL and I.
Ok so that is a bit of a long rant. LOL I just wish that DH could have gotten a free 5K (he would have put it towards the adoption) and people assuming that we are so well off. And as much as I love MIL....she has no backbone. Her brothers want her to move to Milwaukee (which she wants to get out of Chicago) to live with grandpa and take care of him. He's going to be 92 in a few days. I have tried to tell her that is fine and good but they need to compensate her. She will only be 62 in March so cannot get medicare and will need to buy insurance. Or find a new job. Her furniture will need to go into storage. They should have given her grandpa's car and she could have sold hers and not had a car payment. Oh and she still needs to get divorced. She WANTS to move only once and she wants to be with DH and I which is four hours from Milwaukee. I have tried to get her to do what she wants and what makes her happy. But the boys seem to think she should take care of grandpa because she is the girl....never mind that they both are retired and live in the same town he does.
I like DH's mom and his one uncle....rest of the family i could do without. Well grandpa is ok.
Suja, our housing market is one of the cheapest in the country and I believe you about the costs of the McMansions in your area where real estate is more of a hot commodity.
One can get a really nice house in a REALLY nice, old wealth neighborhood here for $500K. It won't be a huge house but those areas in that price range can get you into the best of the best school districts here, which is what drives most real estate in this area - the school district. Up to $1 million and you will get a real mansion that looks like a southern antebellum estate.
IMO a McMansion is one of those new, poorly built 5000 sq ft cookie cutter homes, totally not worth the $500K that you could spend on the good neighborhood and get an architecturally interesting, immaculate, beautiful home in the best school district in our area if you wanted. My DH's cousin has one of those cookie cutter McMansions. It is a decent house in a "not sought after" suburb, basically they just put up a bunch of huge houses in the middle of a lower income suburb. I think my own house had the same builder and I admit and noticed when we bought the house that it was not very well put together IMO. But we paid $80K for our house and I felt that was worth it since our house didn't need any work other than fixing the wiring that thieves had vandalized for copper, and the bank who owned the house at the time paid for it to be fixed for us before we moved in.
ETA: You speaking of the people making the $22K and spending $24K per month reminded me of an article I read a few months ago about "the rich" feeling affects of the bad economy. One of the couples mentioned something about not being able to afford the "$35K private school tuition" for their kids and how it was so sad that they might have to put their kids in public schools. I'm sorry if it offends anyone but that was so freaking hilarious to me!!! I'm like, if you are struggling why would you spend $35K on school and be sad about the prospect of public school. Hopefully you chose your home well and live in a decent school district or you can hire a private tutor to homeschool your kid for way less than $35K. Makes me think of Bridget with her homeschool budget, I bet she could do about 5 years worth of homeschool budgeting or more with $35K. It was pretty funny to me.
Last edited by Ky'sMom; 01-02-2013 at 12:16 PM.
The housing market is similar to that here too Erin. I, well we, me & Rich, could have gotten this gorgeous old Owego home for around 150,000. It was 4-5 bedrooms, office, formal dining, two car garage and inground pool with adjacent 'pool house.' It was absolutely stunning. Very little yard and taxes were over 8,000/year though.