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Thread: Secular Confessions

  1. #31531
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gwenn View Post
    In terms of IT in general for my employer, it's a huge unwieldy organization. The special ed department does have a small number of their own, dedicated tech people though and the one who deals with our computers is aware of the situation and she's the one who I check my laptop out from each year. I feel pretty comfortable with her ...I just don't know what decisions may or may not be made above her. She's really cool, though.
    That's just it...something could be true today and change tomorrow. I'd keep the laptop in a desk and not mention it unless asked about it. Even when I didn't work in IT, I worked in offices that had IT depts and they all seemed to be changing their rules all the time.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  2. #31532
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    You're probably right.

    They have a summer session and I won't be working summer session at all. So if there is no computer there, it would be a huge pain in the butt for whoever uses that desk over the summer if they don't have their own laptop. I think the person who worked at my desk last summer has her own laptop as well, though, if it ends up being the same person. I give up. There's only a few weeks left until the end of the year anyway, and I will have to turn in the laptop for the summer then.
    Me (39) DH (46) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  3. #31533
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    I agree with Chrissy on the laptop. Hang on to it if you can. It's not like someone else is going without because you have a spare machine.

  4. #31534
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    3andMe is offline Every day is a gift. It's just... does it have to be a pair of socks? Hopelessly Devoted
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    Belated condolences for your father in law, Erin.

    Bridget, how are you feeling? I'm sick, too, and I've been thinking about you. You probably don't want me to be thinking about you in this context, though. In fact, I have spent half the night in the bathroom and I'm really annoyed about it. If I forget to take an Immodium before bed, I'm awake half the night. It's been all week.

    My kids have been fighting so much lately. I had requested on the kindergarten application that they be put in the same class, but I've been having second thoughts about it.

    DH has been gone for the past few days (he's back today) and between being sick and getting little sleep and the children fighting and needing to be told things way more often than usual, I am continuing with my less than patient streak. I feel crummy, emotionally and physically. And Baby S. is turning 2 next week and I haven't planned anything for his birthday.


  5. #31535

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    Thanks for asking, Lydia! I feel so much better.
    Sorry to hear you're feeling lousy
    Last edited by Bridget; 05-05-2012 at 10:45 AM.

  6. #31536
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    ((hugs)) L. I wish I could come and help so you could rest.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  7. #31537
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    I hope you feel better soon, and the children stop fighting so much.
    Me (39) DH (46) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  8. #31538
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    Good morning everyone! Happy Monday! What did y'all do this weekend? I spent mine working on computers But hopefully it's done and out of the way for a while. Conner's PC had a virus and it was a stinker. I worked on it all week after working all day and finally finished that Friday night. Saturday I set my dad's new Optiplex 990 up (nice machine!) and as payment he gave me his wife's laptop that she bought 7 months ago and never used. I wanted to set that up for Bobbie because her laptop is an old Latitude D810 that was going to be tossed from my other office and the battery was completely dead. But Rich kinda whined that he wanted it so I set it up for him. I took his 4 year old HP and wiped it and reinstalled everything for Bobbie. His (now Bobbie's) only has 2 gb of RAM so it's kinda slow. I was getting irritable with Rich last night because he only uses his laptop to check email and facebook, and pay his credit card bill once a month. Bobbie is actually in school and uses Dreamweaver and Photoshop-two resource hogs-for her digital photography classes. I was more than miffed that he thought he needed the better computer.

    It's the same old thing with him though...he was raised in a family where the parents ate steak while the kids ate hamburger. This is an issue we've never fully resolved and I'm just sick of it. My dad would try to always give my brother and I the best of what he could afford. That's how I prefer to be as well. It's not something I care to argue about any more so I didn't say anything until I was having problems getting Adobe CS 5.5 installed on Bobbie's new-to-her laptop.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  9. #31539

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    I feel like I've been out of the loop for a few days. I hope everyone is well!

    On Friday we went to Boston for dinner and to see another comedian, then on Saturday we picked out a Ford Focus. It's not ready yet because we want some features that aren't on the model they had, but it should be ready in a few weeks. Yesterday we planted the garden and I did my church class thing. I had a last minute panic where I wasn't sure if I asked my co-teacher to pick up some more food for the tasting, but she came with a good bit of stuff including plantains she had fried.

    I got my outfit for 90's night on the cruise, and bought two dresses for formal night. I seriously tried on at least 20 dresses and kind of hated them all in one way or another. I brought home two and DH said he liked one, so I'm keeping that one and I hope to lose a few lbs. in the next month so I can look a little better in it. I'm going to do that couch to 5k thing every day (or at least 5 times a week) and change the routine every week, and I'm seriously cutting down on carbs. Really this time.

    Oh, and I got a haircut that I'm not sure I like. It took her forever to style it and I told her I didn't want to have to style it too much. I told her I wanted long side bangs that I could tuck behind my ear and she did short side bangs. I'm mostly just mad that she didn't do what I asked.
    Last edited by daylilies; 05-07-2012 at 07:57 AM.

  10. #31540
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    We had Travis' 4th birthday party yesterday at one of those Chuck E Cheese type places and it was brilliant. I invited 15 kids thinking that maybe 10 would show up, but they all came! Travis was being his typical moody shy self at first, but he finally came out of his shell eventually and had a great time playing with everyone.

    It's been a strange weekend, though. Dh has been so moody lately. Since he totalled his car, actually. I figure it's the stress of it all. The insurance company only gave us half of what it's going to take to fix the car, so it's quite a lump of money we're having to shell out to fix the car. Any how, dh has been really impatient with the kids lately. He was really bad tempered with them while we were on the cruise. (We were all crammed together in a tiny room so that didn't help either.) It's really upset me though because dh is usually so laid back and easy going. I don't like his new attitude one bit.

    I guess coming back from a vacation is always a little bit of a let down, but it feels even more depressing with the car situation, dh being a jack a ss, and having to strategize about going back to work and childcare. On top of all that, my mom told me my dad is having eye problems, so it's not been great.

    I'd like to run away right now.

  11. #31541
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    We had Travis' 4th birthday party yesterday at one of those Chuck E Cheese type places and it was brilliant. I invited 15 kids thinking that maybe 10 would show up, but they all came! Travis was being his typical moody shy self at first, but he finally came out of his shell eventually and had a great time playing with everyone.

    It's been a strange weekend, though. Dh has been so moody lately. Since he totalled his car, actually. I figure it's the stress of it all. The insurance company only gave us half of what it's going to take to fix the car, so it's quite a lump of money we're having to shell out to fix the car. Any how, dh has been really impatient with the kids lately. He was really bad tempered with them while we were on the cruise. (We were all crammed together in a tiny room so that didn't help either.) It's really upset me though because dh is usually so laid back and easy going. I don't like his new attitude one bit.

    I guess coming back from a vacation is always a little bit of a let down, but it feels even more depressing with the car situation, dh being a jack a ss, and having to strategize about going back to work and childcare. On top of all that, my mom told me my dad is having eye problems, so it's not been great.

    I'd like to run away right now.

  12. #31542

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    Erin, sorry about your FIL. It's nice that he had the recent with your dh and your kids.

    Happy Birthday to Travis! sorry about your dh being an @ss.

    We had a pretty good weekend, on Saturday G started his swimming lessons. He never wants his face or eyes to get wet, so I was impressed when they instructor got him to do both. Could also be there was a little girl G's age, who had no problem getting her face wet. Already at this age, he wants to impress the girls. Daddy cut G's hair yesterday, and his curls are gone. I know they will grow back, but it makes me miss my baby boy with curls. He looks so much older with short hair.

    Saturday night, dh annoyed me. It was a really nice evening and G wanted to ride his bike around our neighborhood. My dh has a hard time relaxing sometimes, and the stalling of the 3 year old can completely annoy him. Which annoys me. Anyway, when it came time for G to cross the street and ride his bike onto the sidewalk, dh was adamant that he do it on his own. Gilly can actually do it on his own, but sometimes when I am there he becomes a whiny crying mess. So we told G to pedal onto the sidewalk, or walk his bike, but that we wouldn't help him. No big deal, he does it all the time. Well he whined and fussed about it. My dh gave me a look, like don't you dare give in and help him. And I did not, and G pushed his bike. Fine, let's move on and enjoy the rest of the walk home. No, dh decided to tell me all the things I do wrong. That G knows how to get his way with me. When it's just dh and G, there is no whining and fussing. And lately G has been really whiny and he will burst into tears easily. But the thing is, I don't give in to the whining. I tell G that I will help him when he asks in a normal voice. To which dh tells me I help G too much. I finally said look at that gorgeous super moon rising over there. It was really pretty.

    On to some good news, we're going to Disney World!!! They have a special deal for Florida residents going on right now, so we decided to just do it. We were going to camp at the DW campground, but we can only go for 3 nights, and we would arrive late at night, we didn't want to set up a tent in the dark. So we got a deal on a hotel. We're so excited, it's been a few years since we have been, and it will be Gilly's first trip.
    Shelley-mom to DS, 6

  13. #31543

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    So sorry Ash It's definitely hard coming back from a vacation especially with all that stress piled on. I'm glad the party went well though.

  14. #31544

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    Shelley, that's so cool that you're going to Disney! When are you going?

    Sorry your DH is being a pain too. Mine also has little patience and like you said, in turn that annoys me and then I'm short on patience. I hate that effect.

  15. #31545
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    Chrissy...my parents would have given me the older laptop as well. I just felt so lucky at college to have a computer in my room. No way would my dad have given me a better computer and taken the older one himself.

    Kate, could you try spanx or something if you feel the dress needs to fit a bit better? When is the cruise? Cool about the new car!

    Ash, sorry your DH is being a grouch. It's hard dealing with a car accident on a beloved car. And it's HARD to vacation together! Vacations are supposed to be relaxing but are so often the opposite.

    As for me, the weekend was nice. DH was down 5 lbs this past week, I was up about 1.5 lbs but I'm also due for AF any second and tend to retain a lot of water. Hopefully that gets out of me by class on Wednesday. We did errands....went to this kind of country bulk store ran by Mennonites. Great prices. Got things like quinoa, wild rice pilaf, nuts, dried cranberries, bulger, whole wheat couscous for good prices. All things I cannot find in a local grocery store....or if I can, these are several dollars cheaper per pound This country store is about 10 miles from my town. It was funny as we had on 90's rock, go in the store where they play mennonite church music, back in the car and turned it on and Offspring was playing right at a swear word part. LOL

    Bought some veggies to plant...so far broccoli and brussel sprouts but it rained and poured for the past few days so too muddy out there. I might be able to get them in the ground tonight though.

    Gave Molly a bath Saturday....she looked so cute and fuzzy! Than we tried to clip her nails. My first time doing it while DH held her down. She was pretty good but I'm afraid that he nails scratch even worse now that I trimmed them. She's got some white ones and a couple black ones and a couple that are mixed. I didn't get any bleeders so that at least was good.

    I also made two mothers day cards this weekend....I make DH help on the one for his mom. And have most of my sister's birthday card done. Getting a little better at it. Had to make an emergency Joann run as I needed grey paper and forgot to buy it. I also managed to not have any pastels and had all neutral or primary or brights for solid paper. Didn't have what I needed there and they closed in 15 minutes and DH was like, lets hurry and go to Michaels. It was just across the highway and we had like 10 minutes. They had what I needed though! I took pictures of the cards and will post them later (camera is at home).

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  16. #31546
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    Yeah for Disney!!! I really want to go before baby turns 3....course we need to get baby first!

    Um yeah we have the same disagreement as well....except ours is over a dog and not a child! I think he expects a bit much and isn't patient enough, he thinks I'm too easy and soft and give in too much and don't expect enough.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  17. #31547

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    The thing with my dh is that he has spent many years volunteering his time with preteen/teen boys, and he sees so many young boys that are completely dependent on their mothers. He does not want me to cater to DS every whim. Which I do not. Not at all. When DH gets like this, he drives me crazy. I wonder if I can get him to have a drink before we go to the parks at DW!!! Joking, well sorta.
    Shelley-mom to DS, 6

  18. #31548
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    ((hugs)) Ash

    for Disney!

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  19. #31549
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    for Disney!! I know ya'll will have loads of fun

    We weren't even allowed to drink milk when we were growing up. "Dad" needed it for his coffee, so it was "off limits" When I tell my mom things like that now she just gets this really confused/ashamed look on her face. Kind of like "was I really that blind?" Um... Yes, yes you were.

    Nolan is in full fledge walking (and climbing!) mode. It's a bit to keep up with, but I love it

    I kept busy and going all weekend, it made it easier. At least I made it through the weekend cigarette free I ordered a gazelle through Walmarts site to store and somehow it ended up in Atlanta GA I've only done site to store to MY store a million times and all of a sudden it changed my settings to GA and I guess I didn't notice

    I get off early today so Nolan and I are going to the park I love having free time to spend with my little man!!
    Last edited by Smplyme89; 05-07-2012 at 11:26 AM.

    Things are a little crazy, but I'm loving every minute of it My Blog


  20. #31550

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    SCUBJIA (well, sort of SCUBJIA). I caught up on my reading in here up to Wednesday. I wrote a post on the train, which got eaten by the subterranean signal gremlins. Then I got sucked in by the work undertow again. So I was only able to read 2 pages back from this page, and there's this gap somewhere between Wednesday and Friday of last week where I don't know what went down with you, my secular buds.

    I just wanted to say hi. I'm still pretty snowed under, but I'm sick right now. I was dropping Bodhi off at school today and he was saying his usual Monday morning "I don't want to go to school!". Except today, I noticed he really didn't want to play with his friends when we got in the door and was being clingy. So I stuck around for Circle Time while he sat in my lap, and he got limper and more lethargic, and felt warm to the touch. Since I'm sick, I figured he might be sick too, so I made the decision to bring him home with me for the day.

    Of course, once I got him home, our ear and oral thermometers both say he isn't running a temp. And he's not acting lethargically anymore. So my DH is giving me this vibe like "you had the wool pulled over your eyes". I'm still trying to get work done today, but it'll be with a lot of distraction.

    Erin, I missed the post about your FIL, but I saw others' responses. I'm very sorry for your loss. to you.

  21. #31551

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    Jennifer, I just got the Kohl's knockoff of Spanx (called Flexees) They do help but they don't work miracles My back sways in and I think that makes my belly look more pronounced (at least that's what I tell myself). If I don't constantly correct my posture it's not so good.

    I leave for the cruise the day before on June 6th. I get back on the 11th.

    Myles, I think better safe than sorry, with Bodhi possibly being sick.

  22. #31552
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    So my cycle started today and DH and I are planning to do another IUI this month. I'm looking at the calendar and I'm really frustrated. Usually I go in for monitoring around day 15, trigger that night, and do the IUI around day 17. You can't predict exactly what will happen, but that's the schedule my body typically runs on being fairly late in the cycle to O. Day 15 is the Monday of my last week at work before we break for summer and day 17 will be my second-to-last day of work. I'll be finishing everything up. There's no chance of my taking the day off or anything else that day.

    Argh! I really don't want to skip this month. What a pain. I'm doing it anyway, but I'm going to have to find a way to get all my crap done before I can go home for the year.
    Me (39) DH (46) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  23. #31553
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    Mandy. Somehow it will work out so you'll get it all done. I'm sure it's going to be a busy, stressful week though.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  24. #31554
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    Good luck, Mandy! You'll get it all sorted!

    I spoke to my DH last night and told him about how his attitude was affecting us all. We've agreed to try to be better supporters of each other when it comes to keeping our patience with the kids. I also spoke to my mom, who told me that my dad finally did go to the doctor about his eye issues and he has a cataract. He's going to a specialist at the end of the month to see what can be done about it. I'm relieved that that's all it is. He's smoked all his life, so every time he has something bothering him, I fear that he's going to have something terrible with him like a brain tumor or something.

    Cash is taking a nap now and Travis is at school, so I'm going to try to browse back at the pages of convo that I missed while I was away cruising. I'm also still working on typing up our cruise experience, so I'll share that when I get it done!

  25. #31555
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    mandy what days do you do clomid...wondering if maybe a change there would change up which days you need to go in? Has the doc mentioned using progesterone?

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  26. #31556

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    Ash, I hope the agreement your DH and you came up with holds up! I'm also glad your dad went to see the doctor about his eyes.
    Mandy, you can do it!

  27. #31557
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    Mandy, I know it's got to be stressful, but I know you can do it. Is there any leeway in rearranging that you can do? Go in later? Work different days or come in on the weekend? I know, you probably have thought over all of the options already. Best of luck to you.

    Ash, I'm glad it is just a cataract for your dad. I hope just talking over your issues with dh will get you on the path to mutual positivity again.

    Mylah, don't feel bad that Bodhi was not obviously sick. He may have been feeling crummy. Viruses don't typically present with a fever. And maybe he bounced back after seeing how much you cared for him. I know that even when I am feeling really bad, I have periods of time when I get better and worse. I would not feel suckered in by him.

    My dh, on his own, came up with an action plan for our kids' fighting over the weekend. He thinks since we are so busy responding to one need or crisis after another, esp. with S. now taking his diapers off or climbing up into the sink and trying to wash his feet (don't ask me why) every few minutes, our kids are just getting louder and needier, trying to compete with each other for affection and attention, and it's no wonder they are pushing each other out of the way and feeling angry. Sure, we go for long walks with them on weekends and we do things with them, but a good deal of our time is spent saying, "Don't lick that!" or "Take that out of your mouth, please" or "If you want to jump, please go jump on the trampoline instead of on your brother" or "Don't pee on the floor!" or "Pens go on paper" or "Don't stick your hand in the rattlesnake hole."

    DH decided that we should implement Operation Attention, and we were determined to change the ratio of imperatives and have more conversation and less alarm, and have them feel useful and interesting and not like they were doing something wrong all the time. We lavished attention on them over the weekend. At any given moment, both of us had a child in our arms, or maybe even two, and we were having meaningful conversations or just snuggling, or going for short walks. They liked it, but it didn't seem to help the screaming and fighting. We had gone on a short road trip, and on the way back I had to put the entire car in time out because they wouldn't stop screaming at each other. I pulled off the highway and turned off the car and didn't go again until everyone was quiet. We ended up eating dinner in two separate restaurants because the twins couldn't agree on the type of food and they wouldn't stop fighting about it.
    Last edited by 3andMe; 05-08-2012 at 03:22 PM.


  28. #31558

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    That's awesome that your DH came up with that. Sorry it didn't work though maybe if you stick to it, things will start to improve.

    I have a question about bedtime, I am against crying it out but I think at a certain age maybe the rules bend a little? For the past....oh, 5 and a half years, Josh has had bedtime issues. We don't cosleep anymore (we haven't in years) so we ask that Josh ask all his questions, get all his talking done before we go downstairs. Josh agrees to this and then it's the same questions and fits and crying every night anyway. He's lonely, his stomach hurts, he wants to be tucked in, he needs a piece of paper, it goes on and on. We are really not open to cosleeping again or even lying down with him until he falls asleep-we used to do this and it took literally hours for him to fall asleep. I would fall asleep before he did. So how do we get him to understand with as little trauma as possible, that bedtime is bedtime and you can't drag it out for hours?

    The tickets don't work, he doesn't want to do that again.

  29. #31559

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    Oh boy, Lydia. A day in the life, eh? Your posts make me tired sometimes! Then again, most of them I can relate to. We have so much squabbling over here and dbf and I were just talking last night about how we don't want to be those parents that are constantly saying, "No, don't, stop" but it's really hard, especially with Kai because he is so dang loud. Everything he does is at high volume.

    Kate, I don't know man. Bedtimes around here have been really rough. We keep changing things around because the kids are happy with one arrangement for a night or 2 and then they say they are scared or whatever. I've resorted to letting them listen to audio books (Would Josh fall asleep to that?) but they keep them up later because they refuse to fall asleep until the end of the story. I probably don't have any good advice to give you about the crying though as I've been told several times lately by dbf that I baby our children too much. Perhaps I do but I cannot help it.

  30. #31560
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    L, that was a great idea. Maybe with time it will work? I would caution against going to different restaurants though. We did that once in similar circumstances (desperation, crabby kids, being HUNGRY!) and that just taught them to really pitch a fit to go to their chosen restaurant. For a while we did 2, sometimes 3, at a time until I said enough is enough and if they couldn't agree then they'd go without. I think once Jesi opted to have sandwiches while we got Chinese and then after that they were able to either agree, or make a deal where one would pick this time, but the other would choose next time. I only say that because it got to be quite a pita to run around town trying to make everyone happy, and then they started demanding the 3rd choice and I wasn't going there.

    Kate, I haven't a clue. As it is, if Conner is dead set on staying up I let him watch tv. I'm a horrible parent.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


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