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Thread: Secular Confessions

  1. #31471

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    WAHHHH! I am sick now. It hit me out nowhere on our walk. Good times. I had to rush all the kids back home so I could get into the bathroom.
    Parents had to come and pick up. I feel awful and of course cannot stop thinking this is how Savana felt sitting in class

  2. #31472
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    Thanks for the advice and experiences ladies! I kind of feel more unease about it now, but thanks

    I know without a doubt I want to stay in the business field, just not sure what I would specifically like to do. We actually are more than willing to relocate, it's something we've already discussed. DH would prefer not too, but if that is what it takes, than we will in a heart beat. More than likely it won't be that huge of an issue though since we do live fairly close to a larger city.

    Things are a little crazy, but I'm loving every minute of it My Blog


  3. #31473
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    Oh, and Erin best of luck! I hope that you get accepted!!

    Things are a little crazy, but I'm loving every minute of it My Blog


  4. #31474
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    With an MBA....I would probably work and go to grad school part time. I have some friends who did that. And most in the classes are also probably doing that.....I was told that their frequently used their jobs for examples and such.
    Accounting, I don't know anything about that.
    At least you do have an idea of field! And you have time to decide.

    with my degree, we were pretty certain relocation was in the cards. I lived in Milwaukee and there are two library schools in WI...there and Madison. Those cities because of the schools tend to have a lot of job seekers in the field and well it's a more specific field.


    The other thing I had considered doing was a PhD in philosphy. DH wasn't as keen on that idea though.....lot of work, lot of years, would have to learn to read two languages.....and than jobs are sparse. I suggested library school and he liked that a LOT more (though I was going to be a childrens librarian at first). Less school....more job options.
    Funny enough my mom read an article when I was 10 about philosophy majors at a local school and thought that sounded like me. And I thought I was having a big epiphany when I decided on library school....and pretty much everyone was like, oh yeah we always thought you should be a librarian ever since you were little. Well they could have saved me a lot of stress if they had told me that! LOL

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  5. #31475
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    Bridget I hope you feel better soon. And just maybe Savana was just feeling the tummy pressure that comes before needing a bathroom. And hopefully the teacher thought that if she needed a bathroom and the stomach ache was bad she was ask to go to the bathroom or to call you. Did the teacher ever respond to you about this?

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  6. #31476

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    She did. She was very apologetic and said that really just thought it was a nervous tummy ache from the emotional week. In my email I told her that if Savana ever complains that she does not feel well, be it emotional or physical that I would like her to ask, "Do you want me to call your mom?" She said she would absolutely do that.

  7. #31477
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    Oh that sounds pretty reasonable. I'm betting a lot of those poor kids were saying that they had stomachaches this past week. It's probably been an awful week for everyone.

    Though next year it will be a new school!!!!

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

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    Thanks Jennifer, I do have plenty of time to decide. I'm just so used to having everything planned and knowing exactly what I want to do. This unsureness (is that a word ) really bothers. *sigh* If everything goes according to "plan" I'll be a sahm by the time I start my Masters. So if nothing else it'll keep my brain stimulated since I am a bit worried about getting bored....

    I have to make an apponitment with an advisor this summer anyway and I'll talk to them briefly about more specifics regarding the Masters program. I thought when I transferred in it would be easy since I had my AA and would just need to meet the BA reqs and be about my way. Well, apparently when I finished at the Community College I never submitted the application for my AA, so it might affect some of the reqs. The school I am attending is a private, catholic school. There Genderal Ed Reqs include a bunch of religion courses that I do NOT want to have to take. So we'll see.....

    Things are a little crazy, but I'm loving every minute of it My Blog


  9. #31479
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    Oh yeah I went to a private catholic school for my BA too. I was a transfer but from two other colleges, didn't have an AA. I did HAVE to take their required classes. One was called mans search for meaning (funny being it was a women's college!) that was half religion, half philosophy. Than I had to take an additional class in each area (where I found I LOVED philosophy). for religion I was able to take World Religions....taught by a nun but a nun who was really open to many paths being equally valid.
    this was my third college...first semester was state school, second two were local lutheran school and finally ended up at a women's catholic college...and I LOVE that school. It's the one I would donate money too if I ever became a lottery winner.....or finish paying off my student loans. LOL

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  10. #31480

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    Bo chews up everything. If Josh leaves anything on the floor Bo eats it up. My MIL bought him a chew toy, I gave it to him and five minutes later he had shredded it up. He rips holes in his cloth toys, so we can't get anything that's stuffed or he'll eat the stuffing. He pulls things off the dining room table, like any plastic shopping bags we have up there with stuff in them, or the placemats, or papers. Anything.

    He doesn't always pee in the same place. Sometimes we'll take him out to pee and he won't but he will on the floor 5 minutes later. We have that enzyme spray that we use whenever we goes. We have one for rugs and one for hardwood. If we leave any clothes on the floor he pees on them, too.

  11. #31481
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    I really love the school, but I am not taking the religion classes. I'll go somewhere else and finish up my BA if I have too. It's like 5 classes and that's alot of money to waste!

    Things are a little crazy, but I'm loving every minute of it My Blog


  12. #31482
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    have you gone through training classes with him? I have never had to train an older dog but being a rescue it sounds like his missed puppy training.

    I wonder if you could almost go back and start with that again. His behaviors are not acceptable and no wonder you think cats are easier!

    I would start off crating him at all times unless you are directly watching him. Also get a good shake can (pop can filled with some pennies). When you see him pulling stuff off the table, throw the can at him...not to hit him but close to him and that should startle him. he's probably very food motivated....one thing we used was a treat called Zukes....small but highly rewarding for the doggie. Everytime he potties outside, practically throw him a party and give him a treat right away. since it's summer, I would take him out on a leash for now and once he potties, he gets off leash and plays for a bit. He probably doesn't want to come back in the house and knows if he potties he might go in right away.

    Chewing stuff, I would try to keep as much away from as possible. Like Molly never got to chew up our shoes because they were never available. They also have toys that are tough and don't have stuffing. I have one that is for tough chewers and it's got an empty plastic bottle inside that I can replace. I also have some rope ones. he should have some kong type ones. Praise heavily when he's doing good and chewing the right stuff.
    Some of the stuffed ones just are not well made and I toss them or have been known to sew the holes if not too bad. Something like this is great http://www.busybuddytoys.com/View.as...ys/description We have the waggle and I put food in the ends and it keeps the girls busy....they LOVE to push it around and get to the food and will play with this to get food even if their dish is full. I got probably the medium sized one at Menards.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  13. #31483
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    Wow FIVE? I only had to do 1.5. I hope that they don't make you transfer!

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  14. #31484
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    I hope not too! I am hoping that since I did have all the credits for my AA, they will not make me do them. All I can do is wait and see

    Things are a little crazy, but I'm loving every minute of it My Blog


  15. #31485

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    His crate is upstairs at the moment, since that's where he sleeps. If he's in his crate while we're at home he barks. I mean most of the time we are there to constantly watch him. But if we're just not in the same room with him we'll see him walking by with something in his mouth. If we're not at home, he's in his crate.

    Bo would also like to remind us that he likes to take stuff out of the trash. Not just food, but papers and everything.

  16. #31486
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    Sorry, I missed a ton and am just jumping in here. Erin, I'm so sorry about your loss. My father has PTSD from Vietnam as well. Many vets turned to drugs and/or alcohol to cope with the things they saw.

    I smoke after quitting for 5.5 years. I suck. I like it and don't have any intention of quitting any time soon...but some day I will quit. When I did before I didn't think it was that hard. I did it cold turkey and without any help. I was ready.

    As for education, I have a 2 year degree and make more than those with a masters in social work. Or teaching. Or a multitude of other careers. Computers will do that I suppose.

    I'm sorry if I've missed some important stuff. I'm swamped at work and swamped at home It sucks.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  17. #31487
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    Just posting really quickly to say that you should tether Bo to an adult when he is out of the crate. Much easier to keep an eye on a dog that has no choice but to be right next to you.

  18. #31488

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    Like, put him on a leash and have me hold it?

  19. #31489
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    Erin, I'm sorry about your FIL.

    Quote Originally Posted by Smplyme89 View Post
    It does Erin, thank you Most of the people I know are just like "Eh, I knew you could". It's fantastic that they *think* I am just that smart, but really I don't feel it and doubt myself regularly. DH and I have been talking about how we are going to pay for Grad school. He's really pushing me to go for it as soon as I am done with my BA. Which should correlate to right after I start staying home. I don't think my Fed Loans will cover me going FT so I might just go PT. The thought of Grad school makes my stomach woozy....
    I financed grad school through loans and a tuition waiver scholarship I was awarded through my department. You are allowed to take out much more in federal loans for grad school than you can for undergrad, because it is much harder to work and do grad school at the same time. When I was in grad school I believe you could get up to 18K per year. Since I didn't go into debt for my bachelor's, it was worth it to me.

    As for difference in salary, it's hard to compare my field directly because the Master's is an entry level degree. People in my field have a range of salaries from maybe 30K at the low end (I think a friend made in the 20's working for the VA Hospital) to 100K+ in certain areas. I believe the median salary in my field is around 50K. I work for the public schools so I'm not on the high end of the salary scale, but I make 12-15K more than a new teacher with a bachelor's degree in my district, which includes a $2K stipend for my master's. I make less than a school psychologist, but they are required to have education beyond the master's level (a Ph.D or an Ed.S. which is basically everything for needed for a Ph.D. except the thesis).

    Is it worth it? I think it really depends on your field. In my case it wasn't an option and I love my job so I wouldn't trade my degree for the world. I'm not certain I would get an MBA, though. I think it does help you, but I have heard that in business it's often experience that makes the difference. I do believe education is worth the price you pay, even in loans. When I was applying to grad schools, one of my professors gave us some advice and I clearly remember her estimating 30K for a graduate degree, and comparing what else you would buy for $30K. The price of a new car with financing. How long would you drive/own that car, as compared to the value you would get out of that degree? To me, the investment in my education is more than worth the price of a car. I think it's a good analogy.
    Last edited by Gwenn; 05-03-2012 at 06:22 PM.
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  20. #31490
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    Quote Originally Posted by daylilies View Post
    His crate is upstairs at the moment, since that's where he sleeps. If he's in his crate while we're at home he barks. I mean most of the time we are there to constantly watch him. But if we're just not in the same room with him we'll see him walking by with something in his mouth. If we're not at home, he's in his crate.

    Bo would also like to remind us that he likes to take stuff out of the trash. Not just food, but papers and everything.
    Get a second crate for downstairs. Put him in and if he's barking he cannot come out. Might take a long time but he will learn to be quiet. Molly is almost 8 months old and she still goes in when we eat dinner most of the time. She used to spend the time whining and still tries it but doesn't come out until she's quiet. I just had her locked in the one downstairs as I was on the elliptical and we don't have drywall (open insulation) and I couldn't watch her. We keep one in the basement and have the upstairs one which moves from room to room as needed.

    As far as trash...that is common. Keep lids on them or empty them a lot. I used to keep the bathroom on the counter. Molly liked q-tips. Catch him with it, firmly say no and naughty and put him in a time out. Just have to be a tad more stubborn than him!

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  21. #31491
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    Quote Originally Posted by Suja View Post
    Just posting really quickly to say that you should tether Bo to an adult when he is out of the crate. Much easier to keep an eye on a dog that has no choice but to be right next to you.

    Oh yeah that is a great idea!

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  22. #31492
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gwenn View Post

    As for difference in salary, it's hard to compare my field directly because the Master's is an entry level degree. People in my field have a range of salaries from maybe 30K at the low end (I think a friend made in the 20's working for the VA Hospital) to 100K+ in certain areas. I believe the median salary in my field is around 50K. I work for the public schools so I'm not on the high end of the salary scale, but I make 12-15K more than a new teacher with a bachelor's degree in my district, which includes a $2K stipend for my master's. I make less than a school psychologist, but they are required to have education beyond the master's level (a Ph.D or an Ed.S. which is basically everything for needed for a Ph.D. except the thesis).

    .
    that is pretty similar to my field as well. MLIS is required for a professional position and pay is pretty close. If you do certain things like systems (computers and web stuff) you make more or if you are a director of a big library of course you make more. Big difference is I know slps are way more in demand than librarians.

    Even with scholarships and help from my parents I still ended up with a lot of loans from undergrad and than adding grad to it was hard. ended up working out for me but still at one point I had almost 60K. Had I not gotten a job with the degree, it wouldn't have been worth it, that is half a house.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  23. #31493
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    Quote Originally Posted by daylilies View Post
    Like, put him on a leash and have me hold it?
    Put the leash around your belt loop (thread the end of the leash through the handle of the leash). Hook him up to the other end. This way, he is attached to you, but your hands are free. Never, ever leave an un-housetrained dog unsupervised, unless he is in a crate.

  24. #31494
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    Quote Originally Posted by Suja View Post
    Put the leash around your belt loop (thread the end of the leash through the handle of the leash). Hook him up to the other end. This way, he is attached to you, but your hands are free. Never, ever leave an un-housetrained dog unsupervised, unless he is in a crate.
    I did this with Nero as a puppy and can recommend it. It really helps.
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  25. #31495
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    I want a dog! But as sad as it is we can't get one right now. Dbf says not until one of our cats is gone. Plus, our landlady says we can only get a dog over 1 year old, and we really want a Golden Retriever, but there are hardly ever any at shelters which I personally prefer a rescue dog. He is certain we're giving one of our cats back to the people who used to own him/where he was born, because he keeps peeing on everything. Well, not everything, but in one corner of the house behind a chair. I'm really at my wits end about it too, so I'm leaning towards telling him it is ok. He really is not a horrible cat, but I've learned from him that I am definitely more of a dog person. He scratches up lots of things, despite me keeping his nails trimmed, the peeing, chasing and tormenting the older cat, sneaking outside. The thing I'm most sad about the situation though is that Remy and the daycare kids likes the cat and Seren likes him too. She actually loves both the cats, but the other one stays away from her mostly because he is old. The one in question is younger and will lay there while she crawls on him and doesn't even bat an eye when she pulls his ears (but of course I move her or the cat when this happens) so yeah... I'm just tired of me cleaning up a pee spot just to have him do it again 2 days later. No matter how clean the litter box is. And I know part of it is because it smells like "his area" but he still did it despite us cleaning the carpet a couple months ago, which we'll now have to do again soon and really really saturate the area well to get the smell up. It just peeves me too that the area is right by the front door, so I'm almost positive the daycare parents can smell it and I can only imagine what they think. Luckily it's not in an area where the kids are, but still. I have an interview tonight and it's super humid here and the humidity really makes the stink more noticeable.

    Oh and I remember a few pages back someone asked about dbf and I, and I'm happy to say we're doing good/better. I mean, not 100%, but there have been no fights or arguments or anything like that since the one I posted about, around Remy's birthday time. He had a concern over something I said, or "liked" on a friend's facebook and we talked about why I "liked it" and it was a productive conversation rather than laced with accusations and insinuations like so often are our arguments. (from his side, not mine, lol)

    **Lizzo**

  26. #31496
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gwenn View Post
    I financed grad school through loans and a tuition waiver scholarship I was awarded through my department. You are allowed to take out much more in federal loans for grad school than you can for undergrad, because it is much harder to work and do grad school at the same time. When I was in grad school I believe you could get up to 18K per year. Since I didn't go into debt for my bachelor's, it was worth it to me.

    As for difference in salary, it's hard to compare my field directly because the Master's is an entry level degree. People in my field have a range of salaries from maybe 30K at the low end (I think a friend made in the 20's working for the VA Hospital) to 100K+ in certain areas. I believe the median salary in my field is around 50K. I work for the public schools so I'm not on the high end of the salary scale, but I make 12-15K more than a new teacher with a bachelor's degree in my district, which includes a $2K stipend for my master's. I make less than a school psychologist, but they are required to have education beyond the master's level (a Ph.D or an Ed.S. which is basically everything for needed for a Ph.D. except the thesis).

    Is it worth it? I think it really depends on your field. In my case it wasn't an option and I love my job so I wouldn't trade my degree for the world. I'm not certain I would get an MBA, though. I think it does help you, but I have heard that in business it's often experience that makes the difference. I do believe education is worth the price you pay, even in loans. When I was applying to grad schools, one of my professors gave us some advice and I clearly remember her estimating 30K for a graduate degree, and comparing what else you would buy for $30K. The price of a new car with financing. How long would you drive/own that car, as compared to the value you would get out of that degree? To me, the investment in my education is more than worth the price of a car. I think it's a good analogy.
    Quote Originally Posted by Cosmosmom View Post
    that is pretty similar to my field as well. MLIS is required for a professional position and pay is pretty close. If you do certain things like systems (computers and web stuff) you make more or if you are a director of a big library of course you make more. Big difference is I know slps are way more in demand than librarians.

    Even with scholarships and help from my parents I still ended up with a lot of loans from undergrad and than adding grad to it was hard. ended up working out for me but still at one point I had almost 60K. Had I not gotten a job with the degree, it wouldn't have been worth it, that is half a house.
    I'm trying to keep the cost of grad school in perspective as you ladies have talked to me about salary ranges. I make roughly about 22k/year (a little less since I'm technically "part time" so they just work me an hour or two short of 40). I will have about 10-12K coming out from my bachelors and grad school is roughly 25K. Going in debt 35+k just to make 30k/year is not really all that appealing to me. Over the course of a lifetime I suppose it could be worth it and I will "break even" in about 5 years (or more if they raise the interest rates ). Plus with experience you get paid more, etc....

    I think I'll start browsing some job hunting websites and see what ranges I am looking at locally. I know that, that makes a huge difference upon pay. Also Gwenn I realy liked that analogy, it is a good one! Thanks for talking me through this ladies. I really appreciate it. I don't really have anyone to talk to about this sort of thing, since no one in my family has ever attended anything beyond technical school so they are all kind of clueless

    Things are a little crazy, but I'm loving every minute of it My Blog


  27. #31497
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    Liz have you tried baking soda? More than likely the reason the cat keeps returning to that spot is because the cat can still 'smell' the urine. Or at least that has been my experience. Have you tried moving the litter box to that spot?

    What type of flooring do you have. If you have carpet you'll have to steam clean (and maybe even remove the layer and put baking soda or something of that sort of the foam underneath). When we moved into where we are now, the laundry room stunk SO bad of cat piss!! We had to rip out the lineoleum bleach/spread baking soda a couple times to get rid of it. That was years of allowing the cats to urinate there though, not just a few incidences.

    Things are a little crazy, but I'm loving every minute of it My Blog


  28. #31498
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    I thought about leashing Molly to me when she was younger but ended up just using doors being closed and a baby gate. That meant she only had the living room and kitchen/dining room....and those rooms are pretty open. And we just made sure that one of us was following her around. The first few weeks were exhausting between that and putting her potty every 30 minutes or less. And trying to say her name all the time so she would learn it.

    Kate this site has excellent advice and was recommeded by the trainers we saw....and used many of the methods on Molly. After time, patience and consistency, it does work. http://www.dogstardaily.com/training...uctive-chewing


    At this point Molly is doing pretty good. But I still am like what is in your mouth....and will pull out a hair ball (usually my hair) or a piece of string on a pretty regular basis. If there is something on the floor, she will find it. She gets crated at night (or in the day when DH is sleeping), when we are not home, during dinner (starting to not do that so much), when downstairs to exercise, when I'm in the shower. She's only just now starting to get freedom to be in all the rooms of the house when we aren't in those rooms. And the house is fairly dog proof (clothes and shoes are always in closets, we don't have kids leaving toys out).
    Training is so much work but worth it to get a dog that listens and that you can trust.....I'm starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel with my little Poogle.....we have had her almost 6 months now!

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  29. #31499
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    You're welcome Christina! I know how you feel. I was the first in my family to attend college as was my DH. We didn't have anyone to guide us and bought into the BS about finding what you love and do it and everything will fall into place. There is so much more to it than that.
    I knew going in, that I was not going into a high paying field. But it is a rewarding career and I really like it. Stability is so so....too many people think that everything is on the internet and can be googled for free. So far from the truth. But at least our administration seems to realize that and we are used and appreciated for now.
    I did not graduating with so much debt but my parents made too much for grants and since I wasn't married or had a baby, I had to use them for financial aid. I did get lucky and consolidated my loans at less than 3% so the payments are affordable. Sadly I am paying on them for something like 25 years.

    Pay varies so much by field and definitely by location. I have a friend who is management at target at corporate, not a retail store. He has an MBA and has worked his way up a bit....I don't know exactly but I believe that he makes something like 70 to maybe 80K a year. But he's salaried and basically works almost every weekend either going in or bring it from home. If his upper emails him on Sunday at 5pm, he will work and get back to her right away. It's really affected his family life.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  30. #31500
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    Quote Originally Posted by Inca View Post
    \Plus, our landlady says we can only get a dog over 1 year old, and we really want a Golden Retriever, but there are hardly ever any at shelters which I personally prefer a rescue dog.
    There has got to be a GR rescue near you. They are extremely popular dogs, and there are always tons in rescues. Where do you live? I have a friend that is involved with GR rescue and can pick her brain if you'd like.

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