Secular Confessions

[Cosmosmom]

So do you think that color really affects babies? I have already gotten this set for the nursery http://www.babysupermall.com/main/pr...lai43006v.html and am glad I did as it's been discontinued and I don't like the new one. In the picture they have a yellow room. Currently our guest room is light grey and I don't plan on keeping it...just doesn't look right with this set. Don't want to go light green as the office next door is light green. Oh and the room has one window that faces north so it tends to feel a bit dark in there. Carpet is the same one that the dogs on lying on so nice and neutral.
So trying to decide between a super light blue or a really pale yellow. Still lots of time to decide but work is slow today and I'm online window shopping.

Trying to think of what I will need to buy and getting ideas of prices. So far have the carseat/stroller picked out and pack n play. And likely the high chair. I will most definitely NOT be a co-sleeper (just not safe at all with me and I don't even really like DH in the bed with me....plus our new mattress is a foam one and that seems unsafe for a baby) so looking at cribs too.
Dh HATES clutter and wasting money...so not looking to have every thing there is to have.
What are some favorites or must haves you all found?

[missychrissy]

...we are all very forgiving in that we do not expect a response to everything.

Erin

I do!! j/k

So do you think that color really affects babies?

Short answer-no.

And you don't need a lot of stuff with a baby. It's all a gimmick. It's typical to buy a whole lot of stuff with the first one, but you end up not using it as much as you thought. When I look back on all my kids, the only things (besides food/clothes obviously) that I could not have lived (happily) without were the swings my kids had as babies. And of course the car seats. But crib, changing table, strollers? Not so much.

[daylilies]

It all depends on preference. I needed a changing table because it's uncomfortable for me to be down on the floor (my legs fall asleep even after a minute). We still have the set of furniture we got for Josh's nursery, in fact. The changing table has drawers underneath it and we use the top for books now.

We had a swing, and an exersaucer but Josh didn't love either one of those. I guess you could go without, at first, and if you really want something later on, get it. We also had a rocking chair but didn't use it much either.
A light yellow or blue would look nice, either way. I don't think it really matters to the baby, though.

[Smplyme89]

I think that set is adorable! And no I don't think color affects babies.

We could not have lived without our swing either, Nolan loved that thing! He slept in it til he was 6 months old! We never used the changing table, even now he just gets changed on our bed or on the floor while he tries to crawl away from me

I miss you ladies! I keep up with reading the posts, but don't interject too often since I feel bad jumping in the middle of a conversation!

[Cosmosmom]

I

And you don't need a lot of stuff with a baby. It's all a gimmick. It's typical to buy a whole lot of stuff with the first one, but you end up not using it as much as you thought. When I look back on all my kids, the only things (besides food/clothes obviously) that I could not have lived (happily) without were the swings my kids had as babies. And of course the car seats. But crib, changing table, strollers? Not so much.

And see I was thinking swing might be optional! LOL I just know that when my cousisns were little my aunts had "stations" that took up the whole house and baby would go from station to station. Various saucers, bouncers, jumpers, chairs.....yeah my DH is so not going to go for that!

We live in a neighborhood with sidewalks and do walk when nice out with the dogs or I will go and walk the mall so I know a stroller is needed.
Crib...well baby needs a place to sleep and it's not with me.
Changing table, probably not doing that. Pack n Play has one attached. I'm too lazy to get on the floor all the time for that and I can't see MIL doing that either. I like that it's portable too....so it could be in the living room if DH is sleeping on the other side of the house, can use in my room with baby when really little (we don't get to bring baby home for a few weeks), or downstairs with MIL once that is set up there and she is with us.
I already have a rocking chair for myself.

Definitely want to not spend too much on totally unnecessary things though that will clutter the house...especially being we are only doing this once and adoption is expensive. And I want a minivan so we are saving for that...we take 5 hour trips back home many times a year and with the dogs...not all that much space for a baby and their stuff.

[Smplyme89]

I really think it depends on the baby Jennifer! Every baby is different. Some like swings, bouncies, exercausers, etc. It just depends. Our walker has been a life saver as well since Nolan took so long to get mobile. It makes him feel like he is going somewhere

[Cosmosmom]

Good to hear about the color. My preference is for a light yellow.

I am tempted sometimes to go ahead and paint and set up the nursery now so I can look at it....since I know baby doesn't use the quilt and all that. But on the other hand, my guest room is nice to look at and it's handy to have (we also have a futon in the office and will just use that later on). Well anyway I will leave it for now....might still be a long time.

[Suja]

In general, babies don't need too much stuff. IMO, fancy bedding is a total waste. You can't put *anything* in a crib when they're babies, so just stock up on crib sheets. You'll be changing that a lot. Once they get old enough, they are still little mess factories, so you can expect fancy bedding to get puked/pooped/peed on with some frequency. And by the time they've outgrown all that, they'll in all likelihood have outgrown the crib too. Mira didn't use the swing too much, but when she did, it came in really handy (she was much higher needs as an infant, and she is a high needs toddler). I much preferred wearing the kid to putting her in a stroller when she was young. It was way easier to have two hands free to do what I wanted to do, like walking the dogs. And it's much easier to go shopping; stores aren't always setup to accommodate strollers well. The only stroller we have is a cheapo umbrella stroller (passed down by SIL), and I take it with us these days when we're doing longer walks with the dogs 'cause the kid gets too tired after some time.

I'm planning to put together a gift basket of sorts for a friend who is having a baby in June. If you'd like, I can let you know what's in it once I'm done. I can pretty much guarantee that it will be mostly practical things, not cutesy things (well...*some* cutesy things).

[Suja]

I don't know what's gotten into me, but I'm on a de-cluttering streak now. I'm hoping to have our house much better organized by the time DH returns. I never realized how much you can get done by putting in a few hours everyday towards taking things apart and trashing stuff that hasn't been used in ages. Also, I think that I'm doing this now 'cause DH is a packrat and would have a heart attack if he actually was here to witness what I'm doing.

My office is a disaster area, and will probably take a good week to set right. We have SO MUCH paper stuff everywhere. What do you guys do with all your mail and such? How do you store things like bank statements, CC statements, financial statements, etc.? That's what's causing everything to be so horrible - there is just no place to put all this junk.

[Cosmosmom]

Ha, I know the fancy bedding is a waste but it's for me. I already bought it like a year ago (along with all the accessories like the lamp and rug and wallpaper border and valance). I might just end up hanging the quilt on the wall once baby is home and using the crib.

I do know I like using strollers. I used to use them all the time when I was babysitting my teen/early 20's years. I like pushing things and will almost always get a cart at the store even for a few items. Also gives me a place for my purse...which tends to be heavy as I carry a water bottle. I have a hard time seeing me wearing a baby...I have to watch out for my back as it is being front heavy. I could see DH wearing though.
Now the trick will be to get the dogs to walk nicely with a stroller. Cosmo isn't so bad as she used to be being older. Going to work on Molly though...she hasn't done much leash work yet.

I like practical ideas too. It's weird because I know my family...my sister, mom, MIL will be throwing us a shower BUT I'm pretty sure that it will not happen until baby is home with us (baby will not come home until birth parents have signed the termination and have gone to court which is why baby will be 3-5 weeks old). So I'm sure that I will get a lot of clothes and toys and cute stuff like that. But I have to have a few bigger things and of course necessary things before the shower. Diapers, bottles....all that kind of stuff.

Our office is very clean and looks like this office.jpgoffice 2.jpgoffice 3.jpg
So we have a file cabinet for all our paperwork and statements that we keep. In there are hanging files that are labeled for various things. I do have a pile that gets on the kitchen counter (we have a long bar) and when that gets a bit high DH freaks and I go through it. But really most mail gets looked at and bills go in the desk drawer that need to be paid still and once paid or whatever, it goes right to the file cabinet.
It has helped in being organized though that we have moved quite a few times...usually ever three years but now we hope to never move again.
Dh gets very stressed about clutter so I have learned to be better organized. He also has a thing of not buying stuff unless there is a need for it AND I know where I am going to put it. Like I picked up some new pans and he was concerned about where they would go. But I already knew that a few were getting tossed (nonstick that wasn't nonstick anymore and another had a broken handle) and I also knew that with a little rearranging that the there would be plenty of space. Why I am thinking about what baby stuff we would actually really need and really use.

[raspberry]

Love the Snoopy bedding, very cute. I think a light blue is a really nice color, and it can be used for a boy or girl. I definitely agree with not needing a lot of stuff. My son loved his swing, he slept in it when he was itty bitty. But then some babies don't like them at all. We got a lot of baby gear from a consignment shop, I definitely recommend those, because babies grow so fast. I remember in my birth room most of the babies had a jumperoo and loved it, well we got one for G and he cried everytime I put him in it!! Luckily we got one at a garage sale and only paid $5, so it was no biggie. But if we had paid retail for that thing ($100), I would have cried myself. The one thing that I used a lot was Gerber cloth diapers-used it for cleaning up baby messes-I used those things for years. And now they are my rags.

So glad to hear that Kai is doing well on the gf diet. Sending him grow grow vibes to Kai.

Suja, my dh and I were just talking last night about ideas for our mail/paperwork. We don't have a lot really, we mostly use ebills or estatement, but still we need some help. We need a filing cabinet. Maybe some racks to put on the computer desk. But then I can see that just being a big messy pile.

[Inca]

Both my kids never cared for swings. Maybe a few minutes here or there, but we could definitely live without it. The one we have now, is one of those space saver ones with a lock on the bottom so it can be a vibrating chair or a swing. Stroller was never too necessary, but it is nice when going on walks or to the zoo, or the mall. (all of which we don't do too often)

[Suja]

The one thing that I used a lot was Gerber cloth diapers-used it for cleaning up baby messes-I used those things for years. And now they are my rags

I have a dozen of those. They are GREAT. I got so sick of Mira puking on the carpet, and the room stinking like puke even after it has been steam cleaned (humidifier brings out the puke stench). Now, I have a system of towel on the floor with a receiving blanket on top with a bunch of the pre-folds on top of that. Usually, that contains puke to just the pre-folds, and every once in a while to the receiving blanket too.

Can you believe this? http://articles.boston.com/2012-02-1...nd-legislation I swear, Northern VA ought to cede from the rest of this stupid Commonwealth.

[demigraf]

Jennifer, for me, things started to click once I had one place to safely set Bodhi down in each room of the house. It could be as simple as a thick blanket in one spot (he didn't crawl until 7 months), but things like carseat, rolling bassinet, swing, bouncer, play-yard, tummy time mat were all nice supplemental tools. Kept him stimulated to move from one room to another too. I wore him a ton as it was because he was unputdownable most of the time. So when I had the opportunity to set him down, I did. Molly (Abbeysmom) can tell you what a freak I was about making wearable carriers. We even came up with a ring sling for wearing baby in the shower/bath.

[Ky'sMom]

Ky loved a swing but Elle not so much. She only wanted to be held. I did wear her a lot but she was so itty bitty and so light it didn't bother my back. Also I did not buy any sort of baby wearing gear, I used a king sized sheet that I cut in half to tie her to me. There are lots of websites that show you how to do it, plust I think all the baby wearing stuff is way too expensive.

I did use my crib because DH doesn't like sleeping long term with babies, but they both slept with me for the first 6 weeks then moved into a crib in our bedroom for 6 months until they moved into their own rooms. I still don't have fancy bedding. Elle has an Ikea Singlar crib that was $70 at the time and I bought about 5 different shades of sheets and that was that. She is still sleeping in the crib, it is now converted to a toddler bed. I only bought the crib/sheets/mattress for her (everything was under $100) and nothing else besides cloth diapers. I do think that crib bedding is cute and all though, just not practical and I also believe in getting toys/swings they enjoy or that comfort them.

For baby showers I am always a dud since I get diapers (either traditional or CDs if I know they are going to CD), lansinoh for my BFing friends, bottles for my formula feeding friends, and some baby legs since I can usually get a good deal on them and they are my cute factor.

Erin

[demigraf]

(So, uh, yeah, Jennifer. When baby comes, you can pretty much expect I'm going to make a carrier for you.)

[Bridget]

My kids were all different swings as well. Savana we didn't have one. Bare minimum with her since we lived in 500 square feet and that included the bathroom and lanaii.
Kai slept in a swing for 6 months.
Sawyer hated it.

I got my arse whooped today. Lol not really but it was such a busy day! I had Sawyer and Kai, of course, then another baby same age as Sawyer, a 2 year old, 2-3 year olds, five year old, 8 year old. I had to shower immediately after everyone left because I was sweating today!!

ETA: And I just drank a nut brown ale in about 4 and half minutes.

[Cosmosmom]

Baby legs?

Myles that is helpful to know. My house isn't big and I am either in the kitchen/dining (one big room) or the living room. So don't really need many stations. If MIL is with us at that time, we will have her living room downstairs as well. I spend very little time in my room or the office (it's mostly DH who goes in there)...only other is baby's room.

and that is very cool and sweet of you! i would definitely love to try a carrier...especially after waiting so long and being that I will be working...Not sure I will want to put baby down when I'm home.
Was just thinking that had we been normal and gotten pg easily, I would have a child turning 4 this year...but than again other things wouldn't have happened like getting our house built or getting Molly....It was already last year at this time I was getting started on the paperwork and getting ready for our classes in March. Time goes by quickly!

[daylilies]

Baby legs are like legwarmers, or very long socks without the feet. I bought a pair for Josh once and they were too small. I've heard people buy knee socks and cut out the feet.

Suja, we keep the important stuff in a safe.

Bridget-what's a lanaii?

I had a mei tai (a type of baby carrier) that DIVADLX made for me. Is she even here anymore? Anyway, it was beautiful, I requested a celestial print and she found a really beautiful one. Josh didn't like it and I never figured out how to put it on quickly and efficiently. I ended up giving it to a local mom when Josh got too big (which was pretty fast, it seemed)

[missychrissy]

Baby legs are like legwarmers, or very long socks without the feet. I bought a pair for Josh once and they were too small. I've heard people buy knee socks and cut out the feet.

Suja, we keep the important stuff in a safe.

Bridget-what's a lanaii?

I had a mei tai (a type of baby carrier) that DIVADLX made for me. Is she even here anymore? Anyway, it was beautiful, I requested a celestial print and she found a really beautiful one. Josh didn't like it and I never figured out how to put it on quickly and efficiently. I ended up giving it to a local mom when Josh got too big (which was pretty fast, it seemed)

I bought one from her too! I loved it! In fact, it's one of the few baby items I kept of Conner's. I wore him while we went hiking in the gorges till he was a year old.

[daylilies]

Aww. I kind of wish I had kept it, now, but I guess it's better off going to someone who will use it. Hopefully she liked it.

[missychrissy]

If someone close to me had a baby, I'd give it to them. Maybe I'll save it for a grandchild. We'll see.

[Bridget]

A lanaii is a porch/deck/balcony in Hawaii.

[missychrissy]

A lanaii is a porch/deck/balcony in Hawaii.

And on Golden Girls

[raspberry]

Gilly wanted to be held all the time, until he started crawling at 7.5 months. I used two different baby carriers, they were a lifesaver for me.
DIVADLX still posts, doulajenn, she doesn't have much time lately, she is in midwifery school!

[Bridget]

I had the mobywrap for Sawyer when he was an infant and it was the best thing out of all my baby stuff. Erin is right that all that stuff is way overpriced but no one uses it forever so easy to buy used.

[daylilies]

A lanaii is a porch/deck/balcony in Hawaii.

And on Golden Girls

Good to know!

If someone close to me had a baby, I'd give it to them. Maybe I'll save it for a grandchild. We'll see.

Aww!

[MashedUp]

I <3 babywearing. I HATED lugging the infant car seat around and very rarely took it out of the car when running errands and stuff. I use a mei tai when my babies are tiny and then the ergo. I still wear my almost 3yo occasionally. I hate lugging my stroller, but that's just me. I would put a good baby carrier on my must have list way before any other piece of equipment.

Bridget, now I want a beer. And I'm sitting at my desk at work!

[missychrissy]

I didn't babywear till I had Conner. I guess I never saw anyone do it (at that time I hadn't been in Ithaca much! ) I found it was much, much, much easier than lugging around a stroller. Even the lightweight ones are clunky. Besides, if you're in a crowded store it's easier to get around with the baby on.

My calendar is slowly filling up with things to do. I'm a little pleased to see there are needy ones here just like at my last job. One lady called in to complain about her computer running excessively slow. She has 2 gb ram, Win XP, and was streaming Pandora while Symantec was trying to do a scan. Yeah, that'll do it. Shut the Pandora down while Symantec runs, m'kay? Oiy.

[Bridget]

I <3 babywearing. I HATED lugging the infant car seat around and very rarely took it out of the car when running errands and stuff. I use a mei tai when my babies are tiny and then the ergo. I still wear my almost 3yo occasionally. I hate lugging my stroller, but that's just me. I would put a good baby carrier on my must have list way before any other piece of equipment.

Bridget, now I want a beer. And I'm sitting at my desk at work!

I had 2! I'm a party animal.
I never can understand how people carry the baby in the carseat. So heavy and awkward! I never do it. Also agree on the stroller front. The only time I've used ours in on walks through the neighborhood so Sawyer can look around but even then I bring the carrier so I can tie him on if he gets fussy.

Our darn cat shat all over the kitchen floor. PUKE. I have very low tolerance for animal stress. I just don't have it in me to clean up after animals since I really do feel like I give it all to my children and dbf. She had it all over he paws and I tried to wash them off and she scratched me. I started crying! lol. I put her out of the deck because I didn't know what else to do. Kai was up by this point and at first I put her in the bathroom and said to Kai, "I'm going to lock her in the bathroom until I figure out what to do." Then she promptly walked out the cat door --D'oh! Forgot about that! lol Then she went to the deck.
At that point I woke up dbf and he cleaned her. I also told him he either has to scrub the floors because gah knows where she trailed that crap or come down with the daycare kids while I do it. I also told him I want her to go to the vet. Something ain't right with her. Her poops and farts are enough to clear a room. Like we all gag and run when she farts. It's funny but awful. Of course he thinks she just needs different food because he doesn't want to pay for a vet visit.
I'm sorry if I seem cold about the cat. I do love her. It's just when I get up at 6 am for the sole purpose of having 20 minutes to myself before the kids wake up, taking care of a stinky, shatty cat is the LAST thing I want to deal with.