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Thread: Secular Confessions

  1. #25201
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    Quote Originally Posted by AbbeysMom View Post
    The test this morning is super light still, maybe even lighter than yesterday. And the digital test says "No". I'm not bleeding anymore though. Right now I think I either caught the pregnancy super early or I had an early mc. I'm going to guess my beta numbers are very low, and that I won't really know anything until after the second one.
    I'm thinking of you and hoping for the best.

    Quote Originally Posted by Bridget View Post
    I could read when I started Kindergarten and my teachers thought my mom was full of it since I wouldn't do it at school until months into the school year. I was way too shy to show my skillz.
    That's how my Jesi was in K. She didn't start out being able to read, but she could definitely count to 100. She never did throughout her entire first year of K though, even though she did it all the time at home. I think 'officially' they said she could only count to 10

    It's really unseasonably warm here...near 70 today. I'm loving it and to celebrate the occasion I wore my miniskirt to work. One of my favorite job perks is that there is no dress code here whatsoever.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  2. #25202
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    Quote Originally Posted by missychrissy View Post
    It's really unseasonably warm here...near 70 today. I'm loving it and to celebrate the occasion I wore my miniskirt to work. One of my favorite job perks is that there is no dress code here whatsoever.
    Luck you!

    We have a Busniess Casual attire here. Which isn't too bad, but some days I would really like to wear my flip flops

    Things are a little crazy, but I'm loving every minute of it My Blog


  3. #25203
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    I wear flip flops, short-shorts and tank tops all summer here.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  4. #25204
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    Just rub it in why don't you Chrissy!

    Things are a little crazy, but I'm loving every minute of it My Blog


  5. #25205
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    Well summer is a mere 8-10 weeks here, if that helps.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  6. #25206

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    I don't have a dress code either.
    Today I am wearing my comfiest jeans and a bob marley tshirt I have had for about 100 years, with my lambskin slippers. It's freezing rain here. Yuck. And I have a full house today. My 3 plus 5 more. Inside all day.

  7. #25207
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    Quote Originally Posted by missychrissy View Post
    Well summer is a mere 8-10 weeks here, if that helps.
    Well that does make me feel a little better William was talking the other day that he would like to move WAY up North I don't know what I would do with myself, without it being Sunny and Hot all 4 seasons of the year

    Quote Originally Posted by Bridget View Post
    I don't have a dress code either.
    Today I am wearing my comfiest jeans and a bob marley tshirt I have had for about 100 years, with my lambskin slippers. It's freezing rain here. Yuck. And I have a full house today. My 3 plus 5 more. Inside all day.
    Wow 8kids inside all day! You poor thing! What kind of activities do you do on rainy days???

    I've been looking at plane tickets for our trip to GA in April. It looks like were driving again since the tickets are $300 each. With it being me and my mom we can split the case and it be under $200 each AND we'll have my vehicle so we can run away if the family gets too crazy She was also talking about wanting to go walking around underground Atlanta so that'll be neat and we can take our time coming home

    Things are a little crazy, but I'm loving every minute of it My Blog


  8. #25208

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    Suja, the pictures are gorgeous! Thanks so much for sharing. My fil, who died this summer at age 92, lived in India as a child. His father was the Harbormaster in Bombay for many years, beginning in the 1920's. My fil's father moved to India from England, when he was about 3 years old. When fil turned 7, his parents decided it was best to send him back home to England for boarding school. At age 7. Can you even imagine sending your 7 year old child to boarding school, and you see him once a year. It was a different time back then. My fil was a fascinating man, I once asked him about living so far from his family, he just shrugged and said that is all he knew. He had extended family still living in England. But since the journey from India to England took 6 weeks, he only saw his parents once a year, sometimes every other year. My fil and mil traveled to India in the 1980's, and my mil fell in love with the country. She has been many many times since. She has asked us that she take Gilly to India when he's 7. Not sure how I feel about G traveling alone with her in India, at that time she will be 76 years old.

    L, that is too funny about baby ds.

    This morning at barely 6am, I heard something in my room, I opened my eyes and G was inches from my face, asking "is it morningtime Mommy?!!" oh daylight savings you are cruel.

    Ashley, that would bother me too about the letter. Children that age need to just play. I just finished reading "Boys Adrift". I feel like buying the book in bulk and giving copies to G's future teachers, coaches, any other adult in his life.
    Shelley-mom to DS, 6

  9. #25209
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gilly'sMom View Post
    Suja, the pictures are gorgeous! Thanks so much for sharing. My fil, who died this summer at age 92, lived in India as a child. His father was the Harbormaster in Bombay for many years, beginning in the 1920's. My fil's father moved to India from England, when he was about 3 years old. When fil turned 7, his parents decided it was best to send him back home to England for boarding school. At age 7. Can you even imagine sending your 7 year old child to boarding school, and you see him once a year. It was a different time back then. My fil was a fascinating man, I once asked him about living so far from his family, he just shrugged and said that is all he knew. He had extended family still living in England. But since the journey from India to England took 6 weeks, he only saw his parents once a year, sometimes every other year. My fil and mil traveled to India in the 1980's, and my mil fell in love with the country. She has been many many times since. She has asked us that she take Gilly to India when he's 7. Not sure how I feel about G traveling alone with her in India, at that time she will be 76 years old.

    L, that is too funny about baby ds.

    This morning at barely 6am, I heard something in my room, I opened my eyes and G was inches from my face, asking "is it morningtime Mommy?!!" oh daylight savings you are cruel.

    Ashley, that would bother me too about the letter. Children that age need to just play. I just finished reading "Boys Adrift". I feel like buying the book in bulk and giving copies to G's future teachers, coaches, any other adult in his life.
    I couldn't imagine only getting to see my parents once a year/every other year!

    HA! Daylight savings has been kicking our butt too! N is ready for at like 6 o'clock since the time change, so I have to keep his cranky whiney butt up for an extra hour or so before we can do bedtime. He already wakes up at 5a.m. I am not going to put him to bed earlier so that he wakes up any earlier!

    Things are a little crazy, but I'm loving every minute of it My Blog


  10. #25210
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    Quote Originally Posted by Smplyme89 View Post
    I couldn't imagine only getting to see my parents once a year/every other year!
    My heart hurt just thinking about it.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  11. #25211

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    Quote Originally Posted by Smplyme89 View Post
    Wow 8kids inside all day! You poor thing! What kind of activities do you do on rainy days???

    It's not as bad as you might imagine. I have many, many things to keep them busy. And they are all truly great kids. I adore them. The hard part is going to be getting them all around the table at meal time! I can't wait to get my new table!!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Bridget View Post
    It's not as bad as you might imagine. I have many, many things to keep them busy. And they are all truly great kids. I adore them. The hard part is going to be getting them all around the table at meal time! I can't wait to get my new table!!
    I remember you talking about the talbe! You definitely have to post pics when you get it all set up

    Things are a little crazy, but I'm loving every minute of it My Blog


  13. #25213
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    There are still quite a few people who send their children to boarding school here. I could never do that. A lot of military families do it, apparently, to give their kids stability instead of moving them around with them.

    Thanks for mentioning that book, Shelley. I'll have to read that since I have 2 boys and one of them is turning out to be the quiet brooding type. Lol. I'm afraid for Travis' sake that school will be boring for him like it was for me. I turned into a daydreamer but I can imagine with him being a boy, he might act out or something.

  14. #25214

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    Quote Originally Posted by missychrissy View Post
    It's really unseasonably warm here...near 70 today. I'm loving it and to celebrate the occasion I wore my miniskirt to work. One of my favorite job perks is that there is no dress code here whatsoever.
    It's goign to be 80 here on Saturday, and raining. Warm and raining is something I really don't like. We're still planning on starting back to Colorado on Saturday too, for our Two week Thanksgiving trip. DH talked to his cousin yesterday and it was 28 degrees there. Don't know how I'm goignt o acclimate to that.

    Abbey is still a little sick, the pedi gave a scrip for abx and told me to wait 24 hours to start. She thinks it's still viral but A's body has a tendency to move into pneumonia. Right now she just coughing occasionally, but it sounds horrible. Not to mention she's sleeping way more. :fingercrossed: her immune system fights this one off!

    Oh, and in an lol moment, as we walked out of the doctor's office, she says to the receptionist "I saw the doctor! That was so much fun!" The receptionist turned to me and said "You sure know how to show her a good time!"



    lost our bean to Triploidy Sep 2010

  15. #25215

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    Quote Originally Posted by 3andMe View Post
    The funniest thing Baby S. has been doing lately is yelling out "Mommy, wipe me!" when he wants me to come to him. The twins yell that to me when they are done pooping (yeah, I know they need to learn!) and he has somehow decided that THIS expression is what he needs to say when he wants Mommy to come running. I'm laughing just thinking about him waking up at night in his crib and yelling, "Mommy, wipe me!"
    That is funny!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by Bridget View Post
    Lydia, that is hilarious!
    And for what it's worth, I still wipe Kai. He sits on the toilet plugging his nose and telling me to hurry up because it stinks.
    LOL, that is funny too!!! I love potty talk, especially from little kids. Elle also still asks me to wipe her even though she knows how to do it. I think she just likes me in the bathroom with her. I can tell she will be one of those girls who likes to go in the bathroom and talk to her friends. She already does it at daycare and she always is telling me something as a secret when I go in to help her in the restroom. When she wants me to help her she will just say "Mommy, I'm doooonnnnneeee!" and I always say, "done what," and she will say, "done pooping silly! What else do I do in the bathroom?" And look at me like I'm crazy.

    Quote Originally Posted by Smplyme89 View Post
    I've been looking at plane tickets for our trip to GA in April. It looks like were driving again since the tickets are $300 each. With it being me and my mom we can split the case and it be under $200 each AND we'll have my vehicle so we can run away if the family gets too crazy She was also talking about wanting to go walking around underground Atlanta so that'll be neat and we can take our time coming home
    If you come to Atlanta, let me know. If I'm still working where I work (I say this because one never knows) I can get us some free tickets to the zoo or something. I work down the street from underground Atlanta.

    And Molly thinking soooo many positive sticky vibes for you. I hope it is just early and that all is well. to you.

    Erin

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    I hope Abbey feels better soon.

    I wish Conner would ask me to wipe him. I still cannot get him to poop on the potty. I have to confess a moment of frustration over the whole thing over the weekend. I really snapped. I wasn't yelling, but I was using the 'stern mommy voice' about it while cleaning him off at 2:00 a.m. I told him me and daddy were sick of it and that he really needed to start sitting on the potty. I kept going and going until I went to put his pj bottoms on and saw his face. omg-I immediately felt horrible. I broke his heart

    I am absolutely at a loss as to what to do about this. We've tried everything except punishment...and even though it's against everything I believe in, in the back of my mind I have a tiny little voice telling me that maybe I should be hard on him about this. I can't do it though, so Rich & I continue taking turns changing poopy pants every other day.
    Last edited by missychrissy; 11-09-2011 at 09:30 AM.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  17. #25217

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    I'm loving the weather! I feel a little conflicted, actually, because I want to take him to see Puss in Boots before it's gone, but it seems a shame to spend an afternoon inside!

    He's at a friend's house this morning, and she's taking them to the zoo and park so that should be fun.

    DH got sent to work in Connecticut until Friday night. When the storm hit up here they got it really bad so he'll be out there fixing downed cable lines and stuff. So if I start posting at 2 a.m. it's because I've never spent the night without him in this house and I'm a little freaked out ;)

    One of the Backstreet Boys (sort of the nkotb of the late 90's/2000's) followed me on twitter a couple days ago..I don't even know why because I wasn't following him. LOL

  18. #25218

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    Aw Chrissy. I have those moments with Josh too. He still pees his pants, although he's getting a lot better about going when he needs to since we reintroduced the M&M rewards. I know how frustrating it is.

  19. #25219
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    Which BSboy was it, Kate? I had a teenage crush on Kevin. Lol.

    Sorry about the potty training stress, y'all. I'd like to offer some advice but I'm sure you've tried everything. What did the trick for us was going bottom-less and staying home for a few days.

  20. #25220
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    Conner is very uncomfortable going without clothes on. He absolutely refuses to do it. Even when it was 100 and we didn't have ac in our house, he would not sleep without both shorts and a t-shirt on.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  21. #25221

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    Howie Kevin's not with them anymore, I think he left quite a while ago.

  22. #25222
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ky'sMom View Post
    If you come to Atlanta, let me know. If I'm still working where I work (I say this because one never knows) I can get us some free tickets to the zoo or something. I work down the street from underground Atlanta.
    If it's free I'm there I didn't know you worked in Atlanta though! We'll be in Gainesville for a few days, stopping in Atlanta for a few, and down to Valdolsta (somewhere in that area) for a day or so

    Quote Originally Posted by missychrissy View Post
    I wish Conner would ask me to wipe him. I still cannot get him to poop on the potty. I have to confess a moment of frustration over the whole thing over the weekend. I really snapped. I wasn't yelling, but I was using the 'stern mommy voice' about it while cleaning him off at 2:00 a.m. I told him me and daddy were sick of it and that he really needed to start sitting on the potty. I kept going and going until I went to put his pj bottoms on and saw his face. omg-I immediately felt horrible. I broke his heart

    I am absolutely at a loss as to what to do about this. We've tried everything except punishment...and even though it's against everything I believe in, in the back of my mind I have a tiny little voice telling me that maybe I should be hard on him about this. I can't do it though, so Rich & I continue taking turns changing poopy pants every other day.
    I wish I had some advice, that has to be so hard

    Things are a little crazy, but I'm loving every minute of it My Blog


  23. #25223
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    Fingers crossed for you, Molly.

    On the questions about Hinduism, caste system, etc. - I'm going to do the best I can to capture the essence of all that stuff, but this is probably going to get long and possibly nonsensical.

    Hinduism is a polytheistic religion, with lots of mythology, lores, etc. surrounding it, kind of like the Greek and Roman mythologies. There is a 'holy trinity' of sorts - Brahma, the creator, Vishnu, the preserver, and Shiva, the destroyer. Of these, Vishnu and Shiva are the more popular deities, and there is actually only one temple to Brahma in India (there is a story about that, about how he bore false witness, was found out, and was cursed that people will not worship him. Because he begged for mercy, the one exception was made). Each of these gods has a consort. Brahma's is Saraswati, the goddess of wisdom. Vishnu's is Lakshmi, the goddess of wealth. Shiva's is Parvati, who in various avatars (each deity is capable of many, depending on the circumstances) often represents power. The avatars of the deities can be worshipped separately (Krishna is an avatar of Vishnu, Kali and Durga are avatars of Parvati, etc.). There is actually a concept of 'Ardhanareeshwara' - which literally means 'half woman god' - essentially, the men are incomplete without their consorts, and their powers really rest with the amalgam of the male and female halves. There are also 'devas' (usually not major deities, but gods nontheless) and 'asuras' (demons) in addition to all the stuff on earth, of course. The gods have children (also gods), some have children with mortals (mortal). Just because one is a deva does not necessarily mean that one acts ethically/morally, and just because one is an asura does not mean that one is unrefined/evil. Lots of gray areas everywhere.

    According to myth, back in the days, men used to live thousands of years. Through prayer and extreme meditation (and by extreme, I mean praying while standing on one leg with your arms held aloft, cutting off body parts and sacrificing oneself, etc.), one could force a god to appear, and grant one's wishes. Essentially, the power of prayer makes it uncomfortable for all living things to exist, so the god has no choice but to appear. The wish could be anything, except immortality and being made a god (which confers immortality). That which is born must die (including various avatars of the gods, if they are in human form), and no god can prevent death. This has been exploited by many asuras bent on getting up to no good, because they can force the gods to give them huge amounts of power and such (but no worries, the bad guys always lose).

    There were men among us that dedicated their entire lives to prayer (Maharshi), and they gain an enormous amount of power as a result. These select people can usually see gods, travel to where they live, talk to them, etc. And their power gives them the ability to put curses on anyone that crosses them (including gods). Most, because of the sort of discipline it requires, use their power with restraint, but there is a particular one who is known for his temper, and goes postal on the gods from time to time. The other thing is that a married woman who is pure (IOW, she has never strayed from her husband, not in thoughts, not in words, and certainly not in action) gets enormous powers by virtue of that. There is a particular one who could, for instance, just take ordinary soil from the riverbanks, fashion a pot out of it and bring water from the river back home for her needs.

    Now, the time on earth has been divided into yugas (epochs/eras). We are in the last one, the kali yuga, which is supposed to see moral and spiritual degeneration of society, and then it all ends and the clock gets reset. Next time around, we get a new creator - this one screwed up - and he's supposed to be better (Hanuman) because he is pure of heart.

    Now, what all this means in practical, day-to-day terms is that there is pretty much a god for everything, and of course, because they each have their own quirks, must be worshipped in certain specific ways. Although there is no requirement that you pray or go to the temple, if you do the rites the wrong way, you could end up pissing off the god, and that's always big trouble. The complicated caste structure likely has its origins in the need for people dedicated to the study of how worship should be done, as well as the need to maintain order/control of the general population. Those that are scholarly, well versed in worship, are the Brahmins, and the highest caste. The kings/rulers/warriors are a tier below, and they're the Kshatriyas. Merchants, tradespeople, farmers, etc. became Vaishyas, and the laborers became the Shudras. Within each of the castes, there are further subdivisions, and what these are vary from region to region (I'm a Kshatriya, but my particular sub-caste, known as 'Nair' is only seen in Kerala). You are born into a particular caste, and you stay there, and at least in the recent past, it came to define who you are, what you could do, etc. (Mythology does not seem to show the same kind of restrictions/barriers - there are cases of people moving up from the caste they were born - not a lot though). In practical terms, this became discriminatory, a way to stratify society and create divisions, with power and wealth concentrating in certain areas, and some people impoverished (and likely to stay that way) because of their birth.

    In order to rectify this, the government instituted a quota system, wherein certain % of seats in institutions of higher learning were set aside for people from the lower castes. The biggest problem with it is that it uses caste as the basis, not economic status - so there are lots of wealthy merchants (Vaishyas) whose kids grow up enjoying every advantage, and while a Brahmin/Kshatriya kid needs to get upwards of 95% on a medical school entrance test, he only needs 60%. In the meantime, while the Brahmins enjoyed prestige, a lot of them are really impoverished - being a priest doesn't pay much.

    Kerala, the state I come from, is among the more evolved. It boasts 100% literacy rate (for some value of 'literate'), and has a big Christian and Muslim population without a whole lot of religious strife. As I mentioned previously, my particular caste exists in this state and nowhere else, and this caste (and certain closely related ones) are matriarchal. The basis for this is that back in the days, men used to be able to go to work and make money independently, but women could not. So the system was designed to protect their financial futures and those of their female offspring (especially). So for instance, let's say that there is a 'community property', which belongs to someone. Upon their death, the property will be divided among their children, grand children, great grand children, etc. However, whenever you hit a male as you traverse down that tree, you stop. So, for my parents' property, my brother gets a share, but his son, whereas I get a share, Mira gets a share, and so would her kids (and so on, as long as there is a girl in the branch). Now that we have wills and such, this sort of thing isn't really enforced much.

    There are lots of cool things about how things were done back in the days, how they changed, how a wife could tell the husband he was no longer welcome in the house, etc. But this has already become a novel, so I'll stop now. THE END.
    Last edited by Suja; 11-09-2011 at 11:41 AM.

  24. #25224
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    Wow, Suja. Thanks for the synopsis! One question from me for now: are you commanded to teach and convert people over like christians do?

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    Quote Originally Posted by AmeriBrit View Post
    Wow, Suja. Thanks for the synopsis! One question from me for now: are you commanded to teach and convert people over like christians do?
    No. There really is no scripture, per-se. What passes for it are usually epic stories - Ramayana and Mahabharatha, and the Bhagvad Gita, which is really the only 'word of god' (so to speak, it's part of the Mahabharatha, which is an absolutely fascinating read). And according to the Gita, 'All paths lead to me', so there really is no one prescribed way to reach god.

    Although there are deities and deities and more deities, there is sort of an overarching theme that they're all part of a whole, and you're free to worship (or not) whichever god/goddess you want.

  26. #25226

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    Very interesting! Thanks for sharing!

  27. #25227
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    Quote Originally Posted by missychrissy View Post
    It's really unseasonably warm here...near 70 today. I'm loving it and to celebrate the occasion I wore my miniskirt to work. One of my favorite job perks is that there is no dress code here whatsoever.
    The dress code is business casual, but it isn't really enforced. Unless one of the new hires shows up in his PJs (yes he did, and he complained bitterly when asked to actually put on some pants).

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    Wow Suja that is very interesting, I always enjoyed Greek Mythology and that reminds me alot of it.

    Things are a little crazy, but I'm loving every minute of it My Blog


  29. #25229

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    Great synopsis Suja!!

    I have a copy of the Bhagvad Gita at home that Ky is reading now. I went through a religious scripture phase as a girl and read a bunch of holy books/stories and still have a rather extensive collection of them. The Bhagvad Gita and the Tao Te Ching are my favorites.


    Erin

  30. #25230

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    Suja, thank you for sharing. I have so much to learn. I really want my kids to know about religions around the world so I need to learn myself.

    Chrissy, I don't know what to tell you. He is just not ready it seems. I'm sure that goes without saying. I used to take care of a little boy who was nearly five and still pooping in his pants. I used to offer him to put on a pull up when he needed to go because egads. Changing a four year old poopy is whole 'nother ball game.
    His mom and I tried everything (short of punishment) and nothing worked. Then one day he went. And the next day. And that was that. He decided he was ready.

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