Page 781 of 1484 FirstFirst ... 2816817317717797807817827837918318811281 ... LastLast
Results 23,401 to 23,430 of 44506

Thread: Secular Confessions

  1. #23401
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Location
    In a van, DOWN BY THE RIVER!
    Posts
    8,435

    Default

    Those are awesome crafts, Molly! I really wish that I could be so creative with crafts like that. Maybe one of these days I'll try it but I don't think I have the concentration level for it!

  2. #23402
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Location
    Avoiding Work
    Posts
    14,719

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by AbbeysMom View Post
    I'm getting Abbey's cold. Staying up until 3 to finish sewing my new bag didn't help.

    But look at how cute it turned out!
    http://www.americanpregnancy.org/for...d.php?t=332783
    Those are SO beautiful! You did a great job

    Things are a little crazy, but I'm loving every minute of it My Blog


  3. #23403
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    In front of my computer
    Posts
    29,722

    Default

    Wow-I'm impressed! Great job!!

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  4. #23404
    3andMe's Avatar
    3andMe is offline Every day is a gift. It's just... does it have to be a pair of socks? Hopelessly Devoted
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    21,511

    Default

    I LOVE that quilt!!!!!!

    We went to Tahoe for the weekend because I had a conference. Dh came along with the twins, and Grandma stayed at our house to take care of Soren for his first nights without us. We took the long way up there to stop and do a cave tour. Dh's camera is broken so I gave him my camera to use on Saturday and told him to take some pictures of the twins in the beautiful scenery for my blog. As you may or may not know, he is an excellent and practiced photographer. He took NO pictures. He said, "It is just too difficult managing two children and taking pictures as well."

    I met someone who is hiring people like me only a few miles away, so I'm going to dust off my resume (I haven't updated it in 14 years) and send it in. I think it may not pay as much, but it's worth checking out.


  5. #23405
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Posts
    14,691

    Default

    Very pretty quilting!

    L, that is a good idea to dust off the resume. Never hurts to send it out and less pay (if it is less pay) might be worth having the commute gone.
    That sucks that he didn't take pictures. Did they like the cave? We have a couple by me and I really like going on them....well in ones with things like stairs and railings and paths and lighting! I could do without the bats though.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  6. #23406
    3andMe's Avatar
    3andMe is offline Every day is a gift. It's just... does it have to be a pair of socks? Hopelessly Devoted
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    21,511

    Default

    There were no bats in this cave. It is too vertical to have bats. It was a beautiful cave, but the tour itself was really lame. Dh said they gave a lot of erroneous scientific information about the processes for crystal formation. And then they filled up a lot of the time by pointing out how various formations looked like stuff. Like, this formation looks like Lady and the Tramp. "You all know Lady and the Tramp, right?" "Right?" The twins stared blankly at her. We shook our heads no. Later on, she pointed out another structure and talked about the reindeer that helps Santa Claus. "You know who that is, right?" The twins again just stared at her. "The reindeer with the red nose?" "Rudolph?" Dh and I again shook our heads, and stage-whispered, "There is a story about a reindeer with a nose that glows red, and they think this crystalline formation looks like it. But don't you think this stalactite over here is very interesting?"

    Anyway, dh and I could have done the tour in about half the time, with fewer references to whatever the original tour guides were hallucinating on the cave walls.



    Last edited by 3andMe; 09-26-2011 at 03:48 PM.


  7. #23407
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Posts
    14,691

    Default

    Aww that is too bad that the tour was lame. I know that the ones we went on by us were pretty good. Not that I would notice but DH would since his masters is in geology and geophysics. LOL

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  8. #23408
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    In my head
    Posts
    11,932

    Default

    Lovely quilt! Great job.

    L, sorry about the cave tour. But it looks like it was fun, despite the extraneous references. But no bats? What a shame!
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  9. #23409

    Default

    Molly that is SO beautiful! Love them.

    Lydia, how annoying about the cave tour. I know when I took Savana to get her haircut the poor women was failing every attempt at getting Savana to talk. "What's your favorite cartoon? What did Santa bring you? What's your favorite candy?"

  10. #23410

    Default

    L, I think I told you his before, but I love the way R always keeps his baby look about him. Love the pic of him in the cave.

    Molly, I commented on the other thread, but I just want to say again how fantastically the projects turned out. I am sad that you & I are both on a sewing bender and are so far from one another. I too was up late last night. I broke 3 needles on a sweater project. The universe might be telling me to trade up on my sewing machines. Now I'll have to share what I made with you ladies too.

    I don't know how much I want/don't want anyone else to reprimand my kid, because I imagine I can't be objective about it. At school, I don't mind him being corrected. There's a good listener board, and it doesn't bother me that his name gets taken off if he doesn't listen, because I just see it as another game, and there's no penalty associated with it. But anyone acting angrily or snottily or dismissively to my son? That would really chap my hide, mainly because I wouldn't treat another adult that way.
    Last edited by demigraf; 09-26-2011 at 10:57 PM.

  11. #23411

    Default

    So what do you guys think about this:
    I took Josh to his new swim class today, it was the first week I have taken him because DH took him the first week and he was sick last week. So there was one other boy, the only other kid in the class, who was crying and really unhappy. It's the class where the parents don't go in with the kids. Josh was fine, but the other kid did not want to go in. The teacher scooped him up and brought him in the water. Basically dragged him.

    I'll tell you, I was personally not happy with this, but his mom just looked on. The boy cried for about 10 minutes and then he was fine. I think Josh helped him because he was so happy and talked to the other kid and everything.

    But would you let someone else handle your kid like that? I wouldn't.

  12. #23412

    Default

    No way I would not! We pulled Savana from one of the programs here because one of the teachers hoisted Savana up under her arm and took her to the water kicking and screaming specifically after dbf had told them to let her sit off to the side until she was ready. I was steamed. When I called her to speak to her about it she said that most parents want them to "get the kids in the water."

    I just think it goes against everything we try to teach our children about who is in charge of their bodies and that no means NO. And no means no very specifically in regard to another adult (a stranger nonetheless) forcing them into a situation they are not comfortable with. Gah, I get so angry about that!

  13. #23413

    Default

    No, you won't be bodily forcing my child to do anything. That is such a violation of their personhood.

    "Any idiot can face a crisis; it is this day-to-day living that wears you out." -Anton Chekhov


  14. #23414

    Default

    I have never run into a situation like that Kate. I know I wouldn't want anyone doing anything like that to one of my kids. A lot of kids in my family are terrified of water and I admit I do attempt to get them to go in the water but I don't drag them kicking and screaming. I just ask them to put their feet in, if they want me to hold them, can I rub water on their face. If they say no, I am like Bridget and will back off. It is so disrespectful to do something like that to a child, not only disrespectful but maybe even traumatic for the child. Elle is kind of leery of water. She isn't as crazy over water getting on her as she used to be but she will tell everyone she doesn't like water on her face, on her arms, on her whatever. She will actually go swimming though. She sat at the edge of the pool and we talked about it all summer and I am proud that she will go in the water now. When we went on vacation this summer at a waterpark she even went down a water slide about 6 times. I was just amazed and proud of her. The teacher could have just let the boy sit for a while until he was calm and worked with Josh. More than likely the boy would have seen Josh having a good time and eventually joined in and if not, he is entitled to one of those days just like anyone else at some time.


    Erin

  15. #23415

    Default

    I have never run into a situation like that Kate. I know I wouldn't want anyone doing anything like that to one of my kids. A lot of kids in my family are terrified of water and I admit I do attempt to get them to go in the water but I don't drag them kicking and screaming. I just ask them to put their feet in, if they want me to hold them, can I rub water on their face. If they say no, I am like Bridget and will back off. It is so disrespectful to do something like that to a child, not only disrespectful but maybe even traumatic for the child. Elle is kind of leery of water. She isn't as crazy over water getting on her as she used to be but she will tell everyone she doesn't like water on her face, on her arms, on her whatever. She will actually go swimming though. She sat at the edge of the pool and we talked about it all summer and I am proud that she will go in the water now. When we went on vacation this summer at a waterpark she even went down a water slide about 6 times. I was just amazed and proud of her. The teacher could have just let the boy sit for a while until he was calm and worked with Josh. More than likely the boy would have seen Josh having a good time and eventually joined in and if not, he is entitled to one of those days just like anyone else at some time.


    Erin

  16. #23416
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    In my head
    Posts
    11,932

    Default

    That is so sad. I can't believe someone would haul a kid around like that, especially in a case like Savana's when you told them to let her sit out and watch. I would have lost it completely.

    But that's so great that Josh is doing well and being a good example for the other kids!
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  17. #23417

    Default

    I have to wonder what part of kicking and screaming in protest the teacher didn't understand. I mean, really?!? How has that worked for the teacher so far?

    Erin, Elle can already swim?

    Bodhi is on week 4 of his swim lessons and we're thinking they're not worth the time and we should go to another swim school. The pool is in a high school gym and so huge that there are a million other activities going on at the same time. It's horribly loud in there. The noise level is bad enough. But then they have this crate of water toys, and Bodhi gets fixated on them. He's completely distracted the whole time. All he wants is the toys. And the water is too cold. Normally B likes to be in the water in pools with me, but this one is not is happy place. He does have a lot of fun in the locker room, though. Everyone seems to dote on him in there.

    Speaking of Walmart, have any of you guys seen the documentary "Walmart: The High Cost of a Low, Low Price?" It makes you never want to shop there again. The thing is, Target employs a bunch of the same business practices. And yet I still shop there at times for household stuff because - in a nutshell - I like their marketing better. How's that for a confession?

  18. #23418
    3andMe's Avatar
    3andMe is offline Every day is a gift. It's just... does it have to be a pair of socks? Hopelessly Devoted
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    21,511

    Default

    The twins had their first swimming lesson last week. It's pretty nice. Only five kids in the entire pool, no toys, warm-ish water, only one other kid in their class. But the instructors just asked them to start kicking toward them, and they don't know how to swim at all. They don't even get their faces wet. They're scared of getting water in their ears. The other kid starts kicking away. I told the teachers they'd never had a single swimming lesson before. They tried to get them to blow bubbles in the water. DD kept putting her face close and then giggling. They wouldn't hold on to the edge because they were hopping around and excited, and DD fell into the water off the platform at one point--came up gasping and crying. I tossed the baby to DH, ready to go to her, but the teacher handled it and I was glad she let him comfort her.

    I think being forced into the water would be very counter-productive for any kind of learning.

    Molly, I read a while back when I was in Tahoe I think about how you appreciated it when other moms pitched in to help discipline your daughter, and I have to say it was interesting seeing your perspective. I liked it. I don't ever mind it when my mom disciplines any of my children, but she is essentially the third caregiver at our house so she needs to be able to discipline them. It's never come up that someone else has had to. We're not around anyone else enough, and I'm never far enough removed that someone else needs to. My mom tends to discipline less than dh and I do, and will not call the kids on rude behavior like yelling and demanding more of something instead of asking nicely.

    I realize as I write this that at a playground today I told a complete stranger (a 3-year-old boy) that he needed to get off the slide because his turn was over and other children wanted to come down the slide. He was just hanging out on it, blocking it.


  19. #23419

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by demigraf View Post
    L, I think I told you his before, but I love the way R always keeps his baby look about him. Love the pic of him in the cave.

    Molly, I commented on the other thread, but I just want to say again how fantastically the projects turned out. I am sad that you & I are both on a sewing bender and are so far from one another. I too was up late last night. I broke 3 needles on a sweater project. The universe might be telling me to trade up on my sewing machines. Now I'll have to share what I made with you ladies too.

    I don't know how much I want/don't want anyone else to reprimand my kid, because I imagine I can't be objective about it. At school, I don't mind him being corrected. There's a good listener board, and it doesn't bother me that his name gets taken off if he doesn't listen, because I just see it as another game, and there's no penalty associated with it. But anyone acting angrily or snottily or dismissively to my son? That would really chap my hide, mainly because I wouldn't treat another adult that way.
    My MIL randomly gave me her 1 year old Janome Platinum machine and that has fueled a lot of sewing projects lately. It's a super simple machine that works incredibly well (with the walking foot attachment it managed through 4 layers of batting on that bag I made). Love, Love, Love it. <3 And no kidding about living far apart. You would have loved the impromptu quilting bee in Colorado this summer too.

    Quote Originally Posted by daylilies View Post
    So what do you guys think about this:
    I took Josh to his new swim class today, it was the first week I have taken him because DH took him the first week and he was sick last week. So there was one other boy, the only other kid in the class, who was crying and really unhappy. It's the class where the parents don't go in with the kids. Josh was fine, but the other kid did not want to go in. The teacher scooped him up and brought him in the water. Basically dragged him.

    I'll tell you, I was personally not happy with this, but his mom just looked on. The boy cried for about 10 minutes and then he was fine. I think Josh helped him because he was so happy and talked to the other kid and everything.

    But would you let someone else handle your kid like that? I wouldn't.
    Hell no. Stories like this are why we have stayed away from swimming lessons altogether.

    Quote Originally Posted by 3andMe View Post

    Molly, I read a while back when I was in Tahoe I think about how you appreciated it when other moms pitched in to help discipline your daughter, and I have to say it was interesting seeing your perspective. I liked it. I don't ever mind it when my mom disciplines any of my children, but she is essentially the third caregiver at our house so she needs to be able to discipline them. It's never come up that someone else has had to. We're not around anyone else enough, and I'm never far enough removed that someone else needs to. My mom tends to discipline less than dh and I do, and will not call the kids on rude behavior like yelling and demanding more of something instead of asking nicely.

    I realize as I write this that at a playground today I told a complete stranger (a 3-year-old boy) that he needed to get off the slide because his turn was over and other children wanted to come down the slide. He was just hanging out on it, blocking it.
    I should clarify that I belong to a moms group that specifically caters to natural-family-gentle-parenting moms. I like that when I hang out with a couple different close friends from the group, I can let Abbey eat whatever anyone brings without cringing, and I like that if she doesn't share or whatever, another mom will get down on her level and talk to her about it if I'm not right there. I guess it makes a huge difference that my friends tend to parent similarly and my extended family tends to respect our parenting choices.

    I also think I would be totally into a communal living situation, and have tried to talk DH into it several times, but he is firmly against it. He's more of the "live on 100 acres off the grid with no neighbors to speak of" kind of guy, lol.

    On that note, we were all brushing our teeth tonight, I usually help Abbey and use my toothpaste but sometimes DH brushes her teeth too. I use Burt's Bees toothpaste and he uses Crest or whatever. Tonight when I put toothpaste on Abbey's brush she told me "No, no, no, I don't want your hippie-dippie toothpaste. Want Daddy's toothpaste." DH obviously had called it that at some point and she picked it up.



    lost our bean to Triploidy Sep 2010

  20. #23420

    Default

    Abbey! How funny. Savana got a little tube of crest toothpaste at her last dentist appt and she came up to me with a very serious face that she needed to talk to me about something. She then let me know that she was going to use this toothpaste, just this once, and promised not to swallow a bit. It was like she was letting me down gently that the Waleda toothpaste just wasn't going to cut it anymore.

    I am exhausted. Why, you ask? Is it my teething non sleeping 8 month old? My tempermental four year old? The never ending chores?
    Nope. Dbf. It is so hard to parent with someone who is so different. I am at a total loss as to how to make it work! It's the simplest things that turn into knock down drag out tantrums. For example, Kai was in the bath last night in a very involved game he had invented with his little toy animals riding inside his hardhat like a boat. So I go in and say, "In five minutes we are going to load everyone up on the boat and bring them to dry land so that we can have a bedtime story."
    "Okay mom"
    Then I go to read to Savana and I foolishly tell dbf that I gave Kai his five minute warning and that he'll probably need help getting out of the tub and drying off. Dbf goes in and says, "Kai. Out. Now. Bedtime." He reaches in the bath and takes the hardhat out and sets it on the counter. Kai freaks and starts to cry and swats at dbf and tells him to go away. So dbf freaks right back and starts yelling at him that he loses his hardhat forever for hitting.

    Of course I go in and kneel down next to the tub and talk Kai down and he tells me he just needed one more minute to load up all the animals and daddy came in and ruined it. Dbf is in the background going off on me about how their has to be consequences for hitting. And he's right about that but at the same time if he would just pay attention he would know that Kai was in the middle of something. And if he would get off the whole "they need to learn to listen" kick and just follow my lead. He thinks it's so cut and dry that they do as directed or they get punished. It's just not that simple with young children. They listen to me, almost every single time and if they don't I find a way without reducing them to tears.

    It's just gotten to the point where i don't even want to ask him to help anymore. It's so much easier to just do it myself and keep my childrens' dignities intact along with my home peaceful.
    Last edited by Bridget; 09-27-2011 at 06:27 AM.

  21. #23421
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    In front of my computer
    Posts
    29,722

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by 3andMe View Post
    I LOVE that quilt!!!!!!

    We went to Tahoe for the weekend because I had a conference. Dh came along with the twins, and Grandma stayed at our house to take care of Soren for his first nights without us. We took the long way up there to stop and do a cave tour. Dh's camera is broken so I gave him my camera to use on Saturday and told him to take some pictures of the twins in the beautiful scenery for my blog. As you may or may not know, he is an excellent and practiced photographer. He took NO pictures. He said, "It is just too difficult managing two children and taking pictures as well."

    I met someone who is hiring people like me only a few miles away, so I'm going to dust off my resume (I haven't updated it in 14 years) and send it in. I think it may not pay as much, but it's worth checking out.
    What is "people like me" exactly?

    I think it's funny that your dh can't handle the twins and photo taking at the same time. You seem to manage very well!!

    Quote Originally Posted by demigraf View Post
    I don't know how much I want/don't want anyone else to reprimand my kid, because I imagine I can't be objective about it. At school, I don't mind him being corrected. There's a good listener board, and it doesn't bother me that his name gets taken off if he doesn't listen, because I just see it as another game, and there's no penalty associated with it. But anyone acting angrily or snottily or dismissively to my son? That would really chap my hide, mainly because I wouldn't treat another adult that way.
    I didn't even think about school situations or daycare when I commented before. Of course I expect my kids to listen at school and if they get in trouble they will suffer the consequences there. That doesn't bother me at all.

    Quote Originally Posted by demigraf View Post
    Speaking of Walmart, have any of you guys seen the documentary "Walmart: The High Cost of a Low, Low Price?" It makes you never want to shop there again. The thing is, Target employs a bunch of the same business practices. And yet I still shop there at times for household stuff because - in a nutshell - I like their marketing better. How's that for a confession?
    That's why I continue shopping at Walmart-Target, Kmart, etc...they're all the same. The products come from virtually the same conditions-if not the exact same conditions. Walmart just has the reputation for it. Not that it's right-it's not. I just don't know what we can do about it unless we only buy homemade clothing etc from local people. Hemp dresses? They have them in Ithaca!!

    Quote Originally Posted by 3andMe View Post
    Molly, I read a while back when I was in Tahoe I think about how you appreciated it when other moms pitched in to help discipline your daughter, and I have to say it was interesting seeing your perspective. I liked it. I don't ever mind it when my mom disciplines any of my children, but she is essentially the third caregiver at our house so she needs to be able to discipline them. It's never come up that someone else has had to. We're not around anyone else enough, and I'm never far enough removed that someone else needs to. My mom tends to discipline less than dh and I do, and will not call the kids on rude behavior like yelling and demanding more of something instead of asking nicely.

    I realize as I write this that at a playground today I told a complete stranger (a 3-year-old boy) that he needed to get off the slide because his turn was over and other children wanted to come down the slide. He was just hanging out on it, blocking it.
    That also wouldn't bother me. I guess I don't think of that as discipline as much as I think of it as guidance and reminding the kids how to take turns. It's really all about the tone and manner. When I think discipline, I think "mom voice" which I reserve for myself to use. Unless, of course, my kid was running into traffic and I wasn't aware of it, of course. There are always exceptions I suppose.

    As for physically forcing my child into the water? No.freaking.way. I remember when I was just learning to swim on my own and an older kid (teenager) thought I was a better swimmer than I was. He actually threw me out into a pond away from the dock. It was a distance I could have covered, but I was so stunned and scared I forgot how to swim. I remember clearly going under, coming up, going under again. My mother was in one of her manic moods...some other Dad had to jump in and save me and the first words out of Mom's mouth was about how she was wearing her leather belt and didn't want it ruined by the water. I'm not exaggerating-she would have stood there and watched me drown rather than get her belt wet. Why don't I hate her? lol

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  22. #23422
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    In front of my computer
    Posts
    29,722

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by AbbeysMom View Post
    On that note, we were all brushing our teeth tonight, I usually help Abbey and use my toothpaste but sometimes DH brushes her teeth too. I use Burt's Bees toothpaste and he uses Crest or whatever. Tonight when I put toothpaste on Abbey's brush she told me "No, no, no, I don't want your hippie-dippie toothpaste. Want Daddy's toothpaste." DH obviously had called it that at some point and she picked it up.
    that is too funny!!! hippie-dippie toothpaste!! lol

    Bridget-just I wish I had some great words of wisdom. You do have my empathy. You know you and the kids deserve better. I wish I knew what his deal was...that whole, "out. now" thing sounds very much like Rich. He was bad about it when Bobbie and Jessie were little, then he backed off and followed my lead (for the most part) for a number of years...but lately he's really started slipping back into that pattern again.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  23. #23423
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Location
    Avoiding Work
    Posts
    14,719

    Default

    No way on the forcing kids into water! There is no call for it, I'm scared of heights I don't want someone dragging me up a billboard!

    Bridget I'm sorry your going through that, it must be hard to have two so very different parenting styles. I agree with Chrissy that you deserve much better. I honestly don't know how you do all that you do-running a daycare all day while taking care of your 3 LO's, you are amazing mama

    DH and I agree alot on most parenting issues, thank goodness! Although I know for him working on delivery and listening is going to be difficult. He's pretty good about following my lead though and even if he disagrees after a conversation about my "whys" and "hows" he's usually right on board with me. Heck he's the biggest breastfeeding, cloth diapering, natural birth advocate you'd ever seen and he never knew a thing about any of them a year or so ago

    Things are a little crazy, but I'm loving every minute of it My Blog


  24. #23424

    Default

    Bridget. It seems like your dbf uses parenting to feel like he has authority (or control). IMO I think people who were raised by strict parents tend to subconsciously think it's their turn to "be in charge" or whatever.

    TBH I can see it being a really difficult relationship to be in because your dbf doesn't do anything on a daily basis that is so outrageously wrong that it makes it easy to leave, he just seems to have a short temper and low patience and not a lot of appreciation for your work. Basically he just makes it hard to live with him. again.



    lost our bean to Triploidy Sep 2010

  25. #23425
    3andMe's Avatar
    3andMe is offline Every day is a gift. It's just... does it have to be a pair of socks? Hopelessly Devoted
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    21,511

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by missychrissy View Post
    What is "people like me" exactly?
    = My job specialty + my experience + wanting to work 3 days a week. I'm still trying out being discreet on the internet.

    Bridget, that bath does sound awful. Not just for its own sake and for Kai and you, but also for the bigger picture of having your children see you and dbf so obviously at loggerheads on so many basic things. I agree with what Molly said above.


  26. #23426
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Posts
    14,691

    Default

    I don't think that it would even occur to me to discipline someone elses kid at their house. Of course if they were about to run into traffic like Chrissy said that is different. But I figure, their house, their kid......I'm not going to say anything though I probably will talk about it with DH on the ride home!
    Now if the kid is in MY house, I would say something but do it nicely like Johnny please don't throw things in the house. Johnny pet the doggie nicely....that sort of thing.

    I agree. NO WAY is someone forcing my kid into the water. I do plan on doing swimming lessons from infant on though (unless kid is one prone to ear infections...that makes it hard). I grew up with a swimming pool and taught a couple of kids I watched how to swim. And I never had to force any of them into the water.

    Jennifer, 35, DH 36

  27. #23427

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by demigraf View Post
    Erin, Elle can already swim?
    She thinks she can swim ! She has one of those suits with the life jacket in it and she does kick and move her arms in a little doggy paddle but she won't put her face in the water voluntarily. When she went down the water slides her face got wet and she did seem bothered by it but was okay. I taught her how to hold her breath so water in her nose doesn't bother her as much anymore either.

    She will start formal swimming lessons around 4 years old. At that time I figure she will be receptive enough and used to the water enough to be able to follow directions and not be so apprehensive about putting her face in the water. She will go to our neighborhood rec center which gives swimming lessons for youth 4 and above in small classes of 5 kids or less. Ky has had 3 years of swimming lessons and usually there are 3 kids in the class.

    I actually have disciplined (I guess) plenty of kids at the park and at other people's houses and in stores and malls and all sorts of places. But I run across a lot of people who ignore what their kids are doing or kids who don't have parents around them especially at the park a lot of kids come to one specific park on Fridays that we go to and do not have any adult or older person with them so when they start throwing dirt at Elle or rocks at Ky or think it is funny to pester Elle who is easily bothered, I do have long conversations with them and tell them about respect and ask them about what their parents would say if they were there. Most of the time the kids will respond positively and I make a new little friend and they go out of their way to show me how respectful and courteous they are being (my words to them). We have a good time. I have done this with adults there as well and they are not bothered by it. I don't hit children or yell at them or make them sit or anything. I have told them to not come around me or one of my kids though if they are one of those kids who don't like to listen and I will put on my stern voice (which is scary to kids and they usually do as I say even though I do not yell) when I tell them this. I also have a stern look and I have never had any problems, even with rowdy, smoking teenagers even though once I did tell one of them that I would call the police if they didn't leave. They left. If one of my kids does something they shouldn't be doing, I don't mind if someone tells them in a respectful way not to do that. I would mind it if is in a snotty, yelling sort of a way. People have said things to Ky about throwing mulch and I didn't have a problem with that. I usually heard it and reminded him about how I have also told him not to throw mulch because it is not a nice thing to do.

    Erin
    Last edited by Ky'sMom; 09-27-2011 at 10:49 AM.

  28. #23428
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    In front of my computer
    Posts
    29,722

    Default

    I threatened to kick a 14-year-old off his bicycle if he spun rocks at me one more time when I was jogging at the park. After that, he always smiled and waved very nicely at me. I bet his parents wouldn't have thought I was so funny.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  29. #23429

    Default


    I have spoken to kids at the park and at play areas if they are doing something that's not ok and their parents aren't paying attention. Around here that means they are busy smoking a cigarette. In fact, the last time we were at the park there was this granny there with 5 kids and they were all just rough and tumble. She chain smoked at the picnic table and was more than happy to let me correct the children. The one time she came over to do something she brought her cigarette with her and Savana yelled, "GROSS she is smoking around her KIDS!". Savana will always call people out for smoking around kids. She rocks.
    Once at an airport play area I was totally regulating the slide since the older kids were basically steamrolling the toddlers to go down it and all of the other parents were either reading or on electronic devices. One of the kids asked me if I was the teacher.
    Last edited by Bridget; 09-27-2011 at 12:40 PM.

  30. #23430

    Default

    Oh, tween and teenage punk kids? I definitely speak up to them if they're up to no good, especially if their parents aren't around. They're old enough to know better and I think you can assume they can be spoken to practically like adults. I do tend to be fairly gentle and with them too, though. That's the way I deal with conflict in general (but my inner snark comes out at times before I can help it). There were some age 13-ish boys on the beach the other day who started mouthing off to DH and he fought back. DH, can regress into a kid and sometimes get into weird pissing matches with little punks, but that's not all the time. I've seen him take the "Gidget's Dad" role with kids he was correcting too (he was my role model for a kind-but-still-authoritative parental figure while growing up).

    Bridget, I can totally see my DH doing something like M did with the tub. I think the menfolk tend to take things way more literally and don't pick up on the little nuances of our children's needs. Which is unfortunate, because kids are full of nuance. A few weeks back, I was singing to B at night, and he was tired but wanted to stay up to "chat" with me. When I kept insisting he just sleep - and knowing DH is the best person at lulling him to slumberland - B whispered: "Mommy. I don't like you. I want Daddy." And I went out of the room to get DH. I giggled and told DH verbatim what Bodhi said. I was relaying the story mainly because I was excited that B showed a preference for DH at that time (still rare), but DH must have mistook it as my feelings being hurt, because he barged in and loudly scolded B: "Why'd you have to say that to Mommy? That's not nice to say something like that!" and probably upset/stimulated B when I already had him nice and sleepy. I keep wondering if I should have known DH was going to do that and not said anything about B's choice of words that night. And not sure if I should have expected DH to have the same appreciation for what Bodhi said as I did. See? Nuances.

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •