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Thread: Secular Confessions

  1. #23251
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    I love Everybody Hates Chris. Chris Rock is so funny. I love watching him do stand up, too.

    Y'all talking about your husbands working more than one job make me smile at the American work ethic. My husband complains when he has to work more than 38 hours a week. Lol. That's one of the reasons we'll probably never live in the USA. I don't think he could adjust to the work expectations over there. I've become used to European ways, too, though!

  2. #23252
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    I love Everybody Hates Chris. Chris Rock is so funny. I love watching him do stand up, too.

    Y'all talking about your husbands working more than one job make me smile at the American work ethic. My husband complains when he has to work more than 38 hours a week. Lol. That's one of the reasons we'll probably never live in the USA. I don't think he could adjust to the work expectations over there. I've become used to European ways, too, though!

  3. #23253
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    Quote Originally Posted by missychrissy View Post
    I don't mind Rich working extra. He used to do it a lot more than he does now. But I did mind it a few weeks ago when he worked extra and then drank all the $ he made.



    I wish DH had less of a work ethic he drives me crazy sometimes! He easily puts in 60 hours during the week and than is wanting to do side work on the weekends, like really dude take a day off. It's been killing him just to stay home on Sundays so he can take Nolan off my hands while I do my course work I've been trying to con him all week to take the whole weekend off, but we will see

    Things are a little crazy, but I'm loving every minute of it My Blog


  4. #23254

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    My DH used to drive me crazy too with all of his jobs. I even told him that I felt like he tried to work to get away from us. I really believed it at the time as well, even though he said it wasn't true.

    DH also likes to sell things on top of working 2-3 jobs so really he is working 3-4 jobs sometimes. Right now he is only working 1 job and I think he likes it because now that Ky is older they do a lot together. He actually helped create a cub scouts troop at Ky's school. I don't like the BSA much but since DH is the den leader I don't object to Ky being involved. I am happy that DH now has time to spend with him and Elle.

    I always think I should move to Europe since I also don't like to work much. I think the majority of the day in my job at least is a waste of time. I could easily do a whole day's work in 4-5 hours.

    Erin

  5. #23255
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    I can imagine working in Spain would be nice with the afternoon siestas they take. I never want to leave Spain when we go...one of the biggest reasons I was so happy to get Brit citizenship was because it will make it easier to move to Spain (hypothetically!)

  6. #23256

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    I am stressssed!
    I have been taking care of a 9 month old 4 days a week for a little over a month. I keep hoping it will get easier but it isn't. She's a really sweet mellow baby but I didn't take into account all of those time consuming little tasks that would be taking up my whole day with 2 babies.
    I have hardly gotten to do any of my lesson plans with the older kids on the days I have the 9 month old and it's been weighing on my mind, yet I kept thinking it would get better. Well, this week the older children have said several comments to me and to each other that made me know for sure that I am not giving them enough. I have 2 children that I have to make sure are ready for kindergarten as well as homeschooling Savana and Kai.
    So...I told the girl's mom at pick up that I just couldn't do it. I was totally honest and said that because her baby is so mellow and sweet and that I was often plopping her down with a basket of toys and letting her play and didn't feel like I was ever playing with her, only feeding, rocking, changing..the necessities. And that the older children were basically on there own most of the day. They are well behaved of course that is not the issue but I want to be excellent, not half assed.
    Ugh. She said she understood and appreciated my honesty but I could see in her face she was upset. I know she was very happy bringing her here. But seriously this whole week I did one lesson plan the day she wasn't here and it was supposed to be a whole week of balance experiments.
    It's been just meeting the babies needs and then when they are content or sleeping, doing the clean up from meals and such.

    I thought I could do it but I can't.
    Last edited by Bridget; 09-15-2011 at 12:48 PM.

  7. #23257
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    Bridget

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  8. #23258
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    3andMe is offline Every day is a gift. It's just... does it have to be a pair of socks? Hopelessly Devoted
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    Bridget, I feel that way with just the ones I have. I am so amazed that people can actually run daycares or preschools by themselves. There is pretty much no time to actually do a single task or project or experiment in between snacks or cleaning up messes or changing diapers or dealing with whatever hurt at that moment or whatever tragedy struck right then or whatever interpersonal conflict happened. I realize every moment can be a learning moment, but it is so hard to do any of the fun, relaxing, entertaining and directed educational stuff when you have to react or cope with all the things that are happening around you. It's not always like that, of course, and there are times that I am completely astounded that everyone is happily playing and nothing is going on that I have to actually deal with, but those moments are so rare that I actually notice them.


  9. #23259
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    Hugs, Bridget!

  10. #23260
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    In NY even the home daycare centers are expected to have, and follow, lesson plans. I don't know how the heck they do it.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  11. #23261

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    I think it's great that you acknowledge that you can't handle it, Bridget I think a lot of day cares would half ass it and not care.

    DH works a lot, too. He takes the pager as often as he can which means he's on call for the amount of time he has the pager. He can get called in to cover someone who called out or someone who is running behind on jobs. (he's a cable guy) For the next two weeks he's on call, and he went in at 7:30 today and it's 7 pm. and he's not back yet. On call days are long for both of us.
    Last edited by daylilies; 09-15-2011 at 05:05 PM.

  12. #23262
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    Bridget. I think its really sweet of you to admit that you don't feel like you are doing all you can for the older kids. Maybe when the LO gets a little older you can have the mom start bringing her back again??

    Things are a little crazy, but I'm loving every minute of it My Blog


  13. #23263
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    Bridget, you really are an insipiration. Good for you for acknowledging that you weren't meeting everyone's needs.
    Me (40) DH (47) & furbabies * m/c 7/08 4/12 11/12

  14. #23264

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    Thank you, ladies. I did tell her to keep me in mind if she needed me when her daughter was a bit older. She said she absolutely would. I asked her if she had any prospects because I knew she'd looked at several places and she said no not really. I really feel terrible. I do know it's for the best. I felt myself getting really stressed yesterday and there have been a couple of times where I had to let her or Sawyer cry for a few minutes while I tended to the other and that's not cool with me in a daycare setting. Then last night in bed I remembered that the older kids had asked me if they could paint and I'd asked them to wait and so much time passed that we all forgot. Not cool!
    I think dbf is a little annoyed that I'm giving up the money but to his credit he's not saying anything and just said that I have to do what I think is best.

    A few minutes ago I went to check on Savana and she was in her bed crying. When I walked in closer to see what was going on I saw she had a photo album of pictures and was looking at one of her and my mom. I sat her on my lap and we cried together. She was very upset and told me she couldn't stop feeling sad. Nothing I said comforted her, which i totally understand. I told her I was going to leave and let her be with her sadness for a little while. When I walked out she said, "I'm just going to let it all out." So sad and sweet.

  15. #23265

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    Hi everyone! I'm back on APA because I guess we will be TTC this month. But because this is where the cool people hang out, I though I'd just post here.

    I have like 35 pages to read and then I'll jump in with some comments, ha.

    AFM Today I took my cats to the vet and they have fleas, which they got from the boarders we took them to while we went to Colorado for 4 weeks. The vet scolded me and said "You didn't notice her scratching all the time?" No, I didn't. I'm the worst cat mom ever. And I'm really unhappy about putting insecticide on my kitties too.

    And now I get to steam clean my whole house and do about 55 loads of laundry to make sure we don't have them inside the house.



    lost our bean to Triploidy Sep 2010

  16. #23266

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    Yay! Glad you are back! Sorry about the fleas.

  17. #23267
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    Awww Savanna is such a mature little girl. It must be hard to have her hurting and not being able to "fix" it

    Sorry about the fleas, what a pain!! I would be calling where you had them boarded and complaining, there is no excuse for that Congrats on your TTC journey, I hope its a quick one!

    Things are a little crazy, but I'm loving every minute of it My Blog


  18. #23268

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    Bridget: If your space can allow more kiddos would you considering hiring help? Maybe more people in your area need a good place to take their kids...

    Erin: LOL at "I do like J does and I lock the door and turn out the lights." Did she ask to have you write it down?

    and your DH being friends with homeless people: My mom was like that, she gave addiction recovery classes at the rehab center in the city where I grew up. A lot of homeless people would have to go there after they dried out in the ER after a night of drinking. I would walk up the street and all these bums would be calling out hello to my mom, this little old lady. She would always stop and chat and offer to buy them food.

    Myles: Where you at? I miss you and now that the weather is cooling off, I want you to come visit again. I swear I've found cool places outside of the suburban wasteland.
    Last edited by AbbeysMom; 09-15-2011 at 09:28 PM.



    lost our bean to Triploidy Sep 2010

  19. #23269

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    Quote Originally Posted by Smplyme89 View Post
    Awww Savanna is such a mature little girl. It must be hard to have her hurting and not being able to "fix" it

    Sorry about the fleas, what a pain!! I would be calling where you had them boarded and complaining, there is no excuse for that Congrats on your TTC journey, I hope its a quick one!
    I'm not that confrontational, so I'll probably just leave a really scathing anonymous google review. That will show them!

    I agree about Savana, I just read your last post. How is she doing with her anxiety issues?



    lost our bean to Triploidy Sep 2010

  20. #23270

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    She is doing so much better it's amazing. I have you to thank for that. Honestly, you really gave me some great advice, all of which I followed. No more hand washing, no more wiping her nose, she's taking dance, the total meltdowns are very very rare. I am so proud of her and relieved that we found a way to help her.

    I can only have 8 kids total no matter how many adults I have. Plus, I could never afford to pay someone for the money I make. But we are keeping our eyes peeled for the perfect spot to open a daycare center.

  21. #23271

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    Quote Originally Posted by AbbeysMom View Post
    Erin: LOL at "I do like J does and I lock the door and turn out the lights." Did she ask to have you write it down?
    Yes, I had to write an "office closing procedure" it is official that we now lock the door and turn out the lights when we leave LOL!!

    Welcome back to the group. Nice to see you around!

    Erin

  22. #23272

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    , Erin. That is too much.
    Sawyer is attached to my boob and will not go to sleep! I'm tired!

  23. #23273
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    We had a rough night last night. Cash was up to his usual antics of getting up 3 times in the night and taking lots of time going back to sleep. Added on to that was Travis coming to our room to say that a mister was in his room hitting him. He must have been dreaming. He then came back out of his room about an hour later to use the bathroom but didn't want to go back to his room, so I turned on his night light. All the while Cash was screaming the place down and dh was losing patience with him, so I had to go diffuse the situation and he ended up in our bed. Now I am so tired.

  24. #23274

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    Quote Originally Posted by AmeriBrit View Post
    We had a rough night last night. Cash was up to his usual antics of getting up 3 times in the night and taking lots of time going back to sleep. Added on to that was Travis coming to our room to say that a mister was in his room hitting him. He must have been dreaming. He then came back out of his room about an hour later to use the bathroom but didn't want to go back to his room, so I turned on his night light. All the while Cash was screaming the place down and dh was losing patience with him, so I had to go diffuse the situation and he ended up in our bed. Now I am so tired.
    I am with you. Sawyer was up all night because his nose his stuffy and he couldn't breathe well.
    How is Travis doing at school? Drop off still hard?

  25. #23275
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    Savannah. What a darling, sweet girl.

    Welcome back!!

    Ash. Sorry you had a rough night last night.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  26. #23276
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    Thanks for asking, Bridget. His last day was Wednesday and that was his half day. I picked him up at lunchtime and told him he was finished at school for the week until next Monday and he was excited and said, "No more school ever?" So I had to explain that he'd be going back next week. His teacher said he's gotten better every day that he's been there. He only cries at drop off time, so it's not too bad. I'm hoping this week or next week will see the end of tears, but Iknow it just takes some time to adjust to school.

  27. #23277

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    Welcome back Abbeysmom! I can't remember if I was KateS when you were on before...I think so...hi! :wave:

    Erin-that reminds me of when DH and I used to own a store...I wrote up a nice opening and closing procedure and our employees still wouldn't follow it. We'd come in the morning and the open sign would still be on, etc. Like how do you not see that when you're pulling out of the parking lot at the end of the shift? Sigh...

  28. #23278
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    Quote Originally Posted by AmeriBrit View Post
    Thanks for asking, Bridget. His last day was Wednesday and that was his half day. I picked him up at lunchtime and told him he was finished at school for the week until next Monday and he was excited and said, "No more school ever?" So I had to explain that he'd be going back next week. His teacher said he's gotten better every day that he's been there. He only cries at drop off time, so it's not too bad. I'm hoping this week or next week will see the end of tears, but Iknow it just takes some time to adjust to school.
    It's so rough leaving them when they're teary eyed. Probably one of the hardest parts of being a Mommy.

    Mama to Bobbie 20 ~ Jesi 18 ~ Syd 14 ~ Conner 6
    I'm gonna be a Gramama! Jesi is due 11/22/13


  29. #23279

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    Quote Originally Posted by bridgetwu75 View Post
    She is doing so much better it's amazing.
    yay!!! I'm so happy for her and you too.

    Quote Originally Posted by AmeriBrit View Post
    We had a rough night last night. Cash was up to his usual antics of getting up 3 times in the night and taking lots of time going back to sleep. Added on to that was Travis coming to our room to say that a mister was in his room hitting him. He must have been dreaming. He then came back out of his room about an hour later to use the bathroom but didn't want to go back to his room, so I turned on his night light. All the while Cash was screaming the place down and dh was losing patience with him, so I had to go diffuse the situation and he ended up in our bed. Now I am so tired.
    Hope tonight is better and you can all get some sleep!



    lost our bean to Triploidy Sep 2010

  30. #23280

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    Molly!! You see? I stay away from APA for a few days and I miss your big re-appearance. Not cool. You should have sent me a fax or skywritten or something to let me know this was happening. I'd have set my alarm.

    I thought about coming to visit you the other day. It kind of stinks now that Bodhi can't just sit in my lap anymore for free on a plane. It pushes the cost of a trip beyond the outer limits. But right now, what I'm most starved for is time. I have a "real job" now. I only work from home about once a week. I can't believe it was already last November when I was last there, and the kids have gotten so much more leggy and mouthy since then. I'm still trying to think up a way to get to TX. Our time together was so fun and relaxing!

    My parents are coming to stay for a month on Tuesday. Face is expressionless. LOL.

    Today (Saturday) actually worked out really well. For the first time ever, I hired a "mother's helper" to come and hang out with me and B this morning while I tried to get things done. So she was supposed to come at 9am. We got up super early and had breakfast and coffee on the beach by 8:30 am, and I was starting to regret I'd hired the helper, because it was so beautiful out that I just wanted to stay and play outside with Bodhi. Well, my helper totally flaked. She texted me at 8:30 to say she'd be late and get to my house at 9:30. I said fine. By 9:45, she was nowhere. I texted her again at 10:10 and told her we were too close to B's nap and we should just do it another time. I did tell her to text me to just let me know she was ok, because I hadn't heard a thing from her. She never got back to me. I don't know if I should contact someone, but don't know whom, or if she is just a tremendous flake. Anyhoo, I ended up using the rest of the morning riding Bodhi on our bike to the beach, where we ran into DH who was surfing. And we spent the rest of the morning together until B came home for his 3-hr nap. I got a project done while he was out. So it was a good morning so far.

    AmeriAsh, I hope the crying at preschool drop-off doesn't continue for too long. I wonder if Bridget has any pointers for how to ease him into being dropped off?

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